Why am I not good enough for her?

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  1. #1

    Why am I not good enough for her?

    I met my girlfriend after browsing through dating sites online and finding her under the foreign women seeking men filter. We both live in the same city, so scheduling dates wasnít an issue. After about a month of going out, we made it official. However, I noticed that she hasnít been replying to my chats as much as she used to and she keeps making excuses not to go out. My friend told me that she saw her at a restaurant with another foreign man and they looked pretty sweet together.

    I confronted her about it and she simply told me that we never said we would be ďexclusiveĒ. She says she prefers to have an open relationship and if I canít handle that, I should just leave. I donít know what to do right now and honestly, Iím just left wondering why am I not good enough for her? I was really hoping that she could be the one, but I guess I was wrong.

  2. #2

    It's not a good mindset to think you're not "good enough" for anyone. You have to look at all dates as "what do YOU have to bring to the table to make ME happy". Maintain some mystery, mystique, and distance.

    Open relationships are not the same as casual dating - they are mLTRs and everyone knows the deal going into them.

    It takes more than a month to get to know someone and you really have to see them at their best and worst, even if she LJBFed you. If you're there through the good and bad (but not hearing her complain about her boyfriends, she has plenty of girlfriends and mom to discuss that crap with), all the other dudes wining and dining her go away fast.

    It takes a couple of years to see someone at their best and worst, and even then you're just getting to know them.

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