Project Rockstar 2017 Journals - Page 3

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  1. #201
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    Journal 18 September 11, 2017
    The land of milk and honey as some have put it. We are in Stockholm Sweden, the last leg of the official Rockstar program. Flying into Stockholm I saw all the farms and forests which reminded me of home. We landed and some of the guys and myself immediately started swiping on Tinder to sample what was waiting for us here. The shuttle ride from the airport to our hotel really reminded me of home in North Carolina. The exit ramps of the interstate was landscaped and a lot of trees and forests were present. My first thought was this reminds me so much of home, I could live here. A really big change form Budapest. I am looking forward to the beautiful blonde blue eyed girls everyone keeps talking about. After not much success in Budapest I am looking forward to some success stories. I should have used the time in Budapest to rest more and game less, but that’s what I came to work on. The girls in Budapest for the most part were not very open to talking or going home with random men. From what I hear the girls in Sweden will approach you and will be very attractive. The girls in Budapest were definitely not as attractive as the girl in Vegas or Mykonos. Swedish blondes should be a nice change of pace and scenery. I met a smoking hot girl in Mykonos and she was from Sweden. I hope she is an indicator of what types of girls will be here. Although she was not blonde she was a solid ten if you are in to the rating system. I am going to message her and see if I can capitalize on her in her home country.



  2. #202
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    Journal 19 September 13, 2017
    Swedish blondes, the tales might be true. We went out to dinner as group our first night in town and had a great meal. After that a couple of us went out to a bar I had saw earlier called the crazy horse saloon. It reminded me of a little country western bar that would be around my home town. It was pretty dead, of course it was a Sunday night. The first table we came to was three Swedish blondes. They were all cute but one in particular caught my eye. I approached them and made conversation then my friends joined in. We were having a good time and went and took shots with one of the girls. She was snap chatting all her friends and eating up my accent. We posed for selfies that got sent to no telling who. We chatted and flirted then her mom called her. I chatted with her mom for a minute and told her I was going to take her daughter back to North Carolina when I left. The girls eventually left and said they were going to a club called F12 and they were put on a list so they could get in. We left and made our way to the hostile we were staying at. The smart thing ti do was to lay down and get some rest for the night but I was excited and wanted to see the girl I had met again. Another rockstar and I decided to venture off and go to the club the girls were at. We researched it and read a lot of reviews which said that if you were not on the “list” then you couldn’t get in. I figured if we dressed nice and bantered a little with the door man then we cold surely get in. That was not the case. We got within about three or four hundred yards of the club and you could hear the music thumping. We thought, holy shit, that place is happening. We got to the entrance and was told we couldn’t get in. The reviews we read were right. There was some more people trying to get in and were arguing with the bouncer about why. We left and went by a couple more bars that were dead and then went back and tried again. This time I told them we would pay an entry fee. They told me we had to know the owner, manager or the dj to get in. I messaged the girl we met earlier to see if she would let us in but that didn’t work either.

  3. #203
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    Journal 19 September 15, 2017
    Circle of truth, an event that I have not been looking forward to. I first heard about it in 2015 when I was introduced to Project Rockstar at the Super Conference. I was told you would leave in tears and everyone would tell you what was wrong with you. It was actually a really positive experience. There isn’t as much wrong with me as I thought, at least that was the feedback I got. I expected way worse feedback than I received which tells me I have worked to overcome a lot of my short comings. For the most part I was told I need to focus on bonding with the guys and helping build them up. I had no idea most thought I was fun to be around and had a gift to bring people’s states up. I knew I was not an active part of the group sometime and ran rackets on people, which I need to actively try to catch they come up. I intend on using the time we have left to bond with the guys and get to know them better, after all we only get one rockstar. Girls will be around forever but the guys on this trip are special and will be my friends for life. The circle of truth was an eye opening experience and you got to find out some true feelings some people have been hiding. Some people had worse issues than others. After it was over I forgot the rackets I had developed and decided to start from scratch and catch any rackets as they came up. It’s funny how the majority of the group will pick up on many of the same flaws that each of us have. Some people it seemed held down right personal grudges on some of the others. Hopefully everyone can learn to let go and concentrate on moving forward without any grudges.

  4. #204
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    Sweden Entry #1

    Monday September 11, 2017.

    This is it. The last flight we will all take together as the Rockstar class of 2017.

    It’s devastating to think of it like that.

    It still feels like this summer will never end. And in a way it won’t because it’s going to shape the rest of my life, and it’s simply something I will never forget. But from here on out I’m going to put extra effort into appreciating every single fucking moment no matter how tedious or minute it feels.

    As we descended into Sweden I noticed we were flying past trees and lakes. The landscape reminded me a lot of where I grew up in Canada, and until now I didn’t realize that I missed it at all. I've been too busy to think about my old life. Vegas, Greece and Budapest aren’t like this. There's no trees or forrests that I saw. Instead they each have their unique climates and unique landscapes that are unlike where I’m from. But this was like getting a taste of home for the first time.

    The Swedish leg of the program doesn’t start until tomorrow, so we’ve got a hostel for the night. We took a shuttle from the airport to the hostel, and I caught myself a couple times mindlessly scrolling through my phone. I put it away and just tried to be present with the guys and take in the sights of the city and country.

    We got dropped off in the city center, and checked into our hostel. It’s close quarters, 7 per room each in bunk beds. A far cry from the Mansion in Vegas, the Villas in Mykonos and even the central apartments we had in Budapest. It’s only one night, but it’s funny how accustomed I’ve become to the lifestyle.

    We went out for a meal together at a nice steak house. We had some laughs and a great meal together. But once it was over, half the guys wanted to go out clubbing, and the other half wanted to go to a movie…

    The emphasis on game is still there for some guys, and it is for me too, but I want to get as much bonding time in with the guys as I can. Plus what’s the best case scenario? I go out, and pull a girl back to the hostel room? I think I’ll sleep instead.

    It doesn't matter how long I sleep for these days, when I wake up I’m still pretty fucking tired. When this programs done I’ll sleep for a week straight to catch up.


    Tuesday September 12, 2017

    We don’t really have anything planned for today. We’re checking into our hotel, where were staying for the remainder of the program at 3 P.M., but other than that the day is ours.

    The hotel is cool, and the location seems prime, but it’s Europe so everything is smaller. The beds are inches, literally inches, apart from each other. This is good opportunities for group situations. something I want to push for in the coming weeks…But for the rest of the time when we're just living, I'm pretty easy going. And I think I can adapt. But one thing I’ve realized sis that I don’t travel as well as I thought.

    It’s taking me longer than I expected to adapt to the new living environments and things like navigating the airport to the city center are irritating me. Probably from a lack of sleep, but it is what it is.

    I'm kind of getting antsy, sitting around for two nights now. So we’re going to a bar around the corner form the hotel to see what it’s about and to get a head star on these Swedish women we’ve heard so much about since day one...

  5. #205
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    Day 47-48 (12-13 Sep)

    We headed to the hotel and checked into where we’d be living for the next three weeks. It’s a really nice hotel, insanely close to the places we’ll be going out (between 200 and 500m in most cases) making logistics a breeze. The rooms are small though, and we’re sharing, which is going to make it interesting when bringing girls back – we’ll just have to do it together. I’m excited about rooming with one of the business mentors that I really look up to and respect, just because he’s an awesome, solid guy who’s a lot of fun once you know him. I headed out with some of the guys to get coffee and food, and just hung out for a few hours. I was still fairly exhausted, and still warming to the idea of being back in the environment with the instructors too. I caught up with one of the instructors, and saw most of them in passing as they were arriving; their breaks were good too. It felt like we hadn’t seen each other for months, not 2 weeks. I caught up on blogs and decided to head out for a casual night with some of the guys. Being a Tuesday, it was very quiet out, so we just went into a tiny bar/club and shared a soda water and chatted. Slowly more people came into the bar and between us we pretty much had every girl in the bar around us, it was cool to see. I was hanging out with a cute blonde and her friend, but told myself there was no way I was going to take her home. An hour later we’re laying in my bed, and I’m thinking wow ok this girl knows how to get laid. It’s so interesting here, the attitude toward sex is that it’s just assumed and is completely normal.

    We met up for the first day of seminars in Sweden, and basically just talked about Sweden, logistics, getting settled for the program for the next three weeks. It’s going to be a much more relaxed program, given we have covered much of the game component and now it’s more of a free form approach; the instructors will provide for where the class is at and what we need. Going out in Sweden is a very different vibe to where we’ve been so far; the focus for people going out is on having as much fun as possible, and we therefore need to have that vibe. We made a lot of progress as a group during the road trip to building that energy, but I still don’t think we’re there yet as a group. We’ll need to work on it.

    Our first official night out was interesting. We generally split the group into three, because the bars and clubs are relatively small. I opted for the table this night, as it was during the week and a bit cheaper, and given I’m on a budget I’ll have to watch how many I go to. We had a fun first night out, I really saw the need to be high energy and having fun; it’s more like a house party where most people know each other, than it is a nightclub. On Wednesday most of the girls are 18 or 19 as well, so that is a very different high energy vibe to play with (every 2 seconds its another snapchat, and they’ve just discovered alcohol). Vici and I were hanging with two gorgeous girls, they were both really into us, but at one point it got all weird with my girl basically pushing her friend out of the club and to go home; she went so far as to arrange for some guy to come pick her up, despite her being madly into Vici. Vici went home too, and I pushed on despite being annoyed. The way it generally works here is that going home together is assumed, but at the very end of the night once all the fun is over and all their friends find guys to go with too. So we went and danced some more, but I was over it and going to leave. She told me to find someone for her friend, so I texted another Rockstar and he was there within 2 minutes killing it. Then she still wasn’t ready to leave, so I saw the girl from the night before and went to chat to her. At this point I was ready to just sleep, so I told the original girl last chance, and left. Then she was messaging me asking where I was, if she could come over etc, and I was so over it at this point and just passed out. Confusing, frustrating, interesting, enlightening.

  6. #206
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    Day 49-50 (14 – 15 Sep)

    Today we had the circle of truth. When Sterling said it would be one of the most impactful days of the summer, I originally thought ‘yeah sure, whatever’. Afterwards, I wholeheartedly believe this to be the case. The premise of the circle of truth is to have a big group of your closest friends tell you all the shitty parts of your personality, the way you act, the things you do that rub people the wrong way, the risks they see in your current and future growth, all in the hope of giving you the leverage to clear off those layers of problems. There’s no pulling punches, no sugar coating, just straight up honest feedback. No where else in life will this opportunity ever be there again; it just doesn’t happen because your normal friends, your family, your girlfriend, they all want you to like them and don’t want to hurt your feelings, so they’ll keep all of this stuff to themselves. It’s so powerful to have all of your brothers tell you their honest thoughts, coming from a place of love.

    We started at 2pm and didn’t finish until around 3 or 4 am. It was a marathon. Some people were shorter than others, some were 2-3 hour marathon sessions in themselves. One thing is for sure, everyone left with a feeling of being humbled, having been shown many things they didn’t even realise, and many others that they knew they had to work on but hadn’t had the fire lit to make it happen. This was certainly true for me. I’m continually in awe of the power of this program, and I’m going to take a few days to work through the information and internalise it, to make myself a better friend, partner, student, mentor, and a better man.

    Sweden is a very different pace for the program than Vegas and the road trip. The instructors are making it a point to fit in and socialise with us more, and I went to lunch with Sterling. It’s great to get to know these people on a more personal level, where you realise while they’ve achieved massive success and growth in their lives, they’re still on their journeys and still learning every day. There’s always more levels, and to the effect of how Sterling put it during out lunch, there’s endless facets of life to explore, endless knowledge and understanding that gets found and lost throughout the ages, and happiness/life is in the process of learning and growing, not the destination. It’s living a full life.

    We had a relatively light seminar the day after the circle of truth, and then headed out. I ended up back at the same club again. I had a number of good interactions, where I just focus on bringing the fun. The banter here is required to be different; sarcasm generally doesn’t fly well (Swedes are too trusting?), and the first few nights out I’d underestimated how funny and fun the people here could be. Tonight it started to click into place; the silly literal funny things connect really well. Depth generally isn’t something that happens on a night out here, which is where some of my growth still lies, so that’s a bit different to deal with. That’s not to say the women here don’t have depth, but when they’re on a night out it’s all about the party and the fun. Communicating that you’re more than a pretty face is done through surface level explanations of who you are and why you’re here, in a way that in the other persons mind they think ‘oh interesting, maybe I’ll talk to him about that later’. I had a number of good interactions with gorgeous women, and toward the end of the night I was chatting to two girls at the bar. They seemed into me, but not that interested at the same time. I was too tired to see where it would go, so I just winged some of the guys around that area. Then, one of the instructors started chatting to one of them, but wouldn’t leave unless her friend found a guy. She pointed at me and then he told me to come back over, and a few minutes later we were leaving. We all headed to my room, and after a bit of logistics (like getting my roommate somewhere else to sleep), we all had an interesting morning. We put the girls in a cab and went for breakfast. We had a really great chat, about life, happiness, the brotherhood and bond of this network here, the future, the abundance in our lives, the amazing shit we’re all going to do together. His story of commitment and dedication to being here was inspiring. I cant wait to see the cool shit we do together in the coming lifetime.

  7. #207
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    Friday 9/15/17 Post:

    Our first official night out was Wednesday at a place called Cafe Opera. We had split up into 3 different groups because the clubs are quite small here in Stockholm. It’s not very practical for us all to go to the same club. We would basically over-run the entire place if we tried.

    Cafe Opera on a Wednesday is a very young crowd. Lots of 19 year old people. It was good to see the instructors and alumni again after coming back to this all after the break. We had a good time just hanging out with each other and bringing fun to the entire place.

    Some of us were starving when it came time to leave the club, so we hit Max Burger. I got a text message from my roommate that he had company in the room, so I took my time with the food. I headed for the hotel, but could not go up to the room yet. So I went to one of the other guy’s room to hang out for a while, until it was safe to go back to my own room. Eventually, I got another text from my roommate that it was safe to come back, so I did. I called it a night soon thereafter.

    Thursday was the day of the “Circle of Truth”. This is a 12 plus hour session of telling each other what about them bothers you. Essentially, every Rockstar gets to take a turn in the “Hot Seat”. Everybody (instructors included) takes their turn telling that person what they could work on about themselves.

    The Circle of Truth is a one of a kind opportunity for each person to learn how other people see them, and how they can improve as people. Insights are shared in quite a brutal fashion sometimes. Differences and misunderstandings get voiced by everybody to clear the air.

    Most Rockstars turn in the Hot Seat take around 30 minutes to 1 hour. There was one exception. His took two and one half hours total. Let’s just say he got lots of feedback. I don’t know how it was for this person to sit in that seat for as long as he did. I’m just glad I was not him.

  8. #208
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    Stockholm Diary #3

    Swedish clubs are definitely different than any other place we’ve been so far… a wild mixture of extremely well-dressed people and guys who look like they were in their best friends’ basement, DJs switching from house to hip hop to pop to 90s in no time… the interesting thing about Swedish people is that they are extremely shy when sober and turn into hyperactive jumping jack party animals once they’ve had enough vodka… Everyone seemingly just wants to get really wasted and wants to go bat shit crazy, so going very deep in interactions is not a route that works very well. And on the other hand, sarcasm rarely ever flies here, and not everyone’s level of English is sufficiently high to understand a more intricate humor, so Swedish flirting basically comes down to being high-energy, dancing, smiling and talking random funny bullshit… quite a change especially for those among us who have relied a lot on going deep so far… and interactions are far shorter here and mean a lot less. That makes it a lot harder to judge where you are at in the interaction – if grinding or making out does not mean much, girls will do it to several guys a night and generally won’t leave the club until closing hours anyway, game basically boils down to having fun and establish some sort of connection while showing intent with a lot of girls, and then using that 30-45 minutes window before closing time to track them down, hope that they haven’t found the one guy they want to spend the night with yet, and try to take them out of the club… so much different from the other places, where we would pick a girl fairly early on in the night and then establish a longer, deeper connection with her and knew where this would be going… learning: cultural differences matter a lot. On the other end, don’t get sucked too much into those stereotypes and don’t undersell your skills believing that shit won’t work… keep trying, keep pushing the thresholds, but just distance yourself from the results if you see the girl that you thought you had a connection with making out with another dude – that doesn’t mean much; that’s just how girls roll in Sweden…

  9. #209
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    Entry # 22

    Sep 14th

    Stockholm Day 3

    First night out with the whole group back together. We were told to expect a completely different culture and holly shit, was it.

    We went to a (supposedly very nice ) club called Solidaritet. It reminded me of a run-down watering spot in midtown Manhattan. I was by far the oldest person there. Most girls were LESS THAN half my age. Virtually no memorable sets. Tried to open maybe 20-25 girls. Some are very friendly and others are completely locked up. The friendly ones however, get absolutely no sarcasm and really evaporate 7 minutes after the standard conversation. Along with the less green ones, they all flock to the table to get fucked up on free booze and vanish once the next table lights up with roman candles and a fresh round of bottles. Some of them literally kiss your butt just to get a drink and then move on.

    Despite of all the difficulties, I actually had fun hanging out, getting shut out and talking to the guys about this new planet and its aliens, while back on the wagon. At some point I went up to the hottest girl I saw and opened her like we were in Vegas. Got shot down pretty fast, but hit state and rode it for the rest of the night. Really got me out of my post-Budapest funk.

    Lets get the takeaways:
    No sophisticated sarcasm.
    Tease them on how hot they are.
    Try and get physical before anything congeals, just to to check that out and feel the resistance.
    Dance more and move with them,

    Stockholm Day 4:

    Circle of truth: one of the most intense and humbling experiences of the program, as expected. We went for 13 hours. I was really looking forward to this. I like getting criticism and receiving it in such a structured and goal oriented (to help me become a better version of myself) forum proved to be invaluable. Overall, it was very constructive and revealing. I have been over-focusing on the game aspect of PR, instead of dedicating a necessary chunk of my time to getting to know the other amazing guys who are here with me. I've been consistently denying my progress, which other guys are noticing and appreciating. I've also over-consumed alcohol on the trip, something that I know I have a problem with. A byproduct of the circle of truth: A totally new higher level of appreciation for my PR brothers. I knew that I was here with some amazing people and that impression has been bolstered after 6 solid weeks. However, up to this point I could only appreciate these guys from a self-centric perspective. After circle of truth however, I got a glimpse of how each person sees me individually and how much they care about building our individual and group bonds. I got a glimpse of how I can appreciate my strength and weaknesses through many outside perspectives. I felt how much they care about me and and us as group. I have not experienced anything this enriching in my life.

  10. #210
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    Sweden Entry #2

    Thursday September 14, 2017


    Despite all the time we’ve spent in night clubs over the past couple months, I don’t look forward to going to night clubs. I don’t know that I ever will, but I’m learning to get past that little initial fear that hits me before we go out, and to trust that once I have a couple interactions I will have a good time.

    Last night was a perfect example of this. The bar we went to was awesome. I had a fucking blast with the guys, dancing and talking to girls it was effortless. And there was a point in the night when it was almost overwhelming the amount of women around us in the bar that I wanted to talk to. It was like there was a vortex around the guys and girls were just getting pulled into it.

    But as quickly as it started it was over, and the dance floor was empty. I guess people were going somewhere else for an afterparty, or just calling it a night becasue it was Wednesday.

    There was one girl that was hanging around toward the end of the night. So I talked to her. Turns out she's from Toronto, a couple blocks from where I live. She's travelling by herself and was out with a few girls from her hostel. I told her to bring her friends to an afterparty down the street. Her friends didn't want to come, so she joined us alone.

    We walked to the after hours bar, but it was closed.

    “Let’s go back to the hotel for an after party instead.”

    We went back and had our own after party, until she left around 5. I slept through breakfast and rushed off to one of the most transformative days of the program... The circle of truth.

    I’ve known about this day since the program started, but hadn’t thought about it much until the last week or so when I knew it was close.

    I was the first one to sit in the hotseat, which was perfect for me, I wanted to get it over with right away. And I'm glad I did.

    The first couple guys struggled to say things about me, but midway through the circle there was a reoccurring theme. I need to speak up more.

    I’m an introvert, with some background that has made it hard to open up so sharing and talking about myself in front of groups is hard for me. I tend to think that people don't want to hear what I have to say, so I should keep my thoughts and problems to myself and not bother others with them. But the group consensus was that I don’t talk enough, and they would like to hear more form me.

    It broke my heart a little bit hearing that guys i respect and admire so much feel like they don't know me. I want to know everyone in this room, and I want them to know me. That's my mission for the next couple weeks.

    I was done pretty quickly, but we sat in that circle until 3 am, sharing how we feel about each other. I made an extra effort to open and share how I feel about each of the guys when it was their turn. That's my way of implementing my personal feedback right away.

    This was an exhausting day, but we all benefitted from it. After hearing how everyone honestly feels about me, made me so much more relaxed and free to share my thoughts around the group. It's an awesome feeling and something I can do everyday from now on.

    Friday September 15, 2017

    I grabbed lunch with one of the guys and we had a really good chat. After yesterday the focus of the group seems to have switched more from game to bonding, and getting to know each other which is awesome. Over an hour and a half lunch I feel like we got to know each other better than we did while we were living together during the entire Budapest leg of the trip.

    We had a relatively light day in the seminar today because yesterday was so heavy. Looking back it maybe the most intense day we’ve spent together on the program.

    For the night out I wanted to go back to the same bar, as we went to on Wednesday for a couple reasons. It was casual, there was good music and a ton of hot women to talk to. Seeing that it’s Friday and not Wednesday my logic is that tonight is going to be even better.

    In a sense it was.

    Part of the feedback I got in the circle of truth was that I should be pushing myself more. Across all areas of my life I tend to stay where I’m comfortable and Women are just one example of this. Project Rockstar has done an amazing job of pushing me outside of my comfort zone, I need to keep pushing and expanding what I’m comfortable with. And approaching women that I feel are out of my league is a great vehicle for building trust with myself that I can leap out of my comfort zone. Plus I’m sure that once I start I’m sure I’ll find that I’m surprised with the results I get.

    I went out with that intent, and while I didn’t get the end result I would have liked I talked with some of the hottest girls I’ve ever talked to in my life.

    At one point I talked to a girl who wouldn’t leave me alone. She literally followed me around the bar. It felt weird to have that, because in the past I would have just left with her. But I wanted to stay and keep pushing. Having to repeatedly walk away from her and push myself into interactions with women that I felt challenged by was different but I’m glad I did it.

    At some point towards the end of the night she must have given up and gone home, because I couldn’t find her. I think I needed to let her go for my own growth. It was so obvious that she was into me, that it would have let me stay right in my comfort zone and neither of us would have gotten much out of it if we did go home together.

  11. #211
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    Sept 14 / 15
    Wednesday night tonight is our first official night out. We hit cafe opera in the non table group. I have a lot of fun. The place is very dynamic. Groups of girls move around constantly, they are with you, and then they move someone else, then come back and then leave around. I compare it to musical chairs where the girls have got ants in their pants. Matching the girls energy seems like a good idea. None of the interactions came close to a result for me. I struggled a little bit, approaching wasn’t as easy. I felt outside my comfort zone. Talking with the instructors they mentioned this is totally normal to feel. It takes a few days to adjust.

    Thursday is circle of truth. I tried to give as brutally honest feedback as I could and made it sharp. I’ve found 3 or 4 words that cut to the point are often what cuts through your shield and makes an impact that is memorable. I found giving and receiving feedback such a gift. It is a gift that unfortunately your normal friends and family are too polite to give. For my circle of truth, some of the feedback is surprising and cuts deep. My natural reaction is to fight back and give my perspective but the important bit is to listen and take your medicine. On reflection the important bit is to focus on overall themes and not as much the specific examples.

  12. #212
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    Blog 20
    Day 50, September 15, 2017
    after talking to some people, i came to the conclusion i needed to take the day to myself and just sit in silence for a change and let everything sink in. it felt good. i walked about for a bit, came back to the hotel and just sat in silence. well it the cafe downstairs stated blasting music. it’s Friday after all. eventually i found myself in fetus position and i went off to sleep for an hour or so. i’m still here in bed as i’m writing this. right now i just feel so calm and relaxed. like a huge weight was lifted off of me.
    at night i happen to go the the same spot as Wednesday and i was a bit nervous as there was no table there. my feelings were i’ll be left all alone to fend for myself and all the other guys would be busy doing their thing. it was quite the opposite. we stuck around with each other the entire time and winged too. i had a better time there than being in a table situation. towards the end of the night i had talked to probably every girl in the club at least once and for my own short falls failed to pull out a girl who was green for sure. at least later i realized that. over all a good night as i stayed till the end and just plowed through the night. something i haven’t done in last 2 weeks.

    Day 51, September 16, 2017
    i’m still soaking in the drilling from the circle of truth. there were moments when i didn’t think about those issues and those little times felt good. and then the sinking feeling came in. it was nice to go out for lunch with one of the guys i’ve bonded the most and just talking to him. at a point during the lunch tears were rolling out while we were taking and it felt good to share it some him. the seminar started late today and most of it i was out of state, just sitting on the side lines and not being to much a part of the group. but i needed that. i’ve made a point to write these blogs after seminar nowadays and right now as I’m trying, i feel a sense of me coming back to normal and going back to the group and joining them in all the activities and not just the required ones. i’ll take some time and let this take its natural course. one thing’s for sure tonight, i’m looking forward to going out as its a good away for me to get out of my head and just focus on other better problems, also known as blonds.
    the night stated out to be good, loved the new spot i was able to go to. unfortunately the main dance floor/club area was closed for a private event and we all had to make the best of it. the girl i met on Wednesday came out to see me but her friend was the biggest obstacle and about 2am i had to let them go. live to fight another day. went to soli later but it was kind of too late did the best i could with the given situation. some learnings about being masculine and leading confidently came out of last night.

    Day 52, September 17, 2017
    started the day with story time which is always fun, and then we just went into our debris. felt so good and such a change to the “back to the vegas” routine. just that made me feel good and happy. later we went out, but it was a dead night, all the bars and lounges we went to was quite empty, but made the best of the night and just took that time to hang out and bond more with some of the guys.

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    Day 51-53 (16-18 Sep)

    I’ve been enjoying the relatively different pace here in Stockholm. It’s given us all a lot more opportunities to just hang out, have lunches and dinners together, go for coffee, sit around and talk shit. The seminar today was very laid back, and we got an insight into the journey the senior instructors have taken so far, where they’re at, and reminisced over stories and experiences. The whole vibe here is perfect for where we’re all at; it’s starting to gear our minds back to life outside the program, but in a different way. None of us will be going back to our old lives in the same way; some of us have to go back home to sort a number of things out, many will continue to travel and work on themselves as they let the dust settle and determine what they want to do, but it’s safe to say no one will be the same or go back to their old lives. That’d be like asking to go back into the matrix; it’s impossible and besides, why would you want to?

    We went out again, I chose not to go to the club with the table (being on a budget I need to be reasonable with how many I go to). We had a great night, dancing and focussing on bringing the fun. After Budapest where I re-found my high energy fun streak, I’ve been bringing that to the party here in Sweden and it goes down well. A few times this night people commented on us being the life of the dance floor, and also noted we did it without drinks in our hands at any point. Another Rockstar and I met a cute girl that was instantly into both of us, and we had some great banter and fun, it was progressing quickly before we lost her but got numbers to continue another day. We stayed and hung out with a group of girls that had been hanging around looking at us for a lot of the night. After a number of logistics solving and leading, the four of us ended up back in my room. One of the girls was into her friend and both of us guys, but her friend was a bit taken back by the suggestion. My friend and her left shortly after.

    The next day I hung out with another Rockstar for a coffee, before one of the guys presented some of his prior experience with rapid language learning. The guy speaks something like 7 languages and has a very structured system for rapidly learning and integrating it. The meta learning process involved was interesting. The talent of the people on this program continually amazes me. The night was a night off, but we went and hung out at a small bar anyway. I wasn’t interested in talking to anyone but my friends, and I was still dealing with some sickness so we left early to hang out. I ended up getting inspired, talking about business and ideas with one of the instructors, and just bonding over life in general.

    This program is about so much more than game. It’s about helping people to see all the elements to live a good and fulfilling happy life, giving them to tools to make it happen. While only a small number of people get the opportunity to be moulded by this insane experience, the level of impact to each individual is so great that I honestly don’t think there’s anything else in the world that could do such a thing, in such a short period. Still so grateful and in shock that I’m here.

    Today we had the first of the business mentor seminars, and wow it was fantastic. The first mentor presenting is a very successful online entrepreneur, and watching him in his element was amazing. He was great at throwing all the puzzle pieces up on the board so we could see the full picture of how he made his success, knowing full well that we could drill down and spend months on each piece. It’s exciting and inspiring stuff for me, right before I head home to hustle and do something very similar. After seminar, a few of us had dinner and then met up with some of the guys and hang out at a coffee shop then a local pub (it was another night off). One of the guys was casually sitting next to a girl at the next table, and when I looked over about 20 minutes later they were gone, and none of us batted an eye; just the start of what becomes normal after being on Rockstar. It’s been great to hang with the guys in settings where we’re not interested in game at all, but if there’s a cute girl and it’s additive to our fun or vibe, someone will talk to her. It’s a big shift/relief from normal life where people have a bunch of anxiety making genuine connections with random strangers, or even during most of Rockstar when everyone is looking for people to talk to. We headed back to the hotel and hung out for a few more hours before sleep.

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    Stockholm Diary #4

    So, we have finally arrived at the business leg of this trip… a full week of millionaires telling stories of how they made it. From what we’ve heard so far, it seems to be all about dedication, tenacity and trial and error. Most of the insights shared are very valuable, but do not seem to be rocket science at all. At most, they are very counter-intuitive. Funny enough: in game and self-development, we’re being told to trust our guts all the time, and now our business gurus step up and tell us that in that domain, we have to put our assumptions and gut feelings aside and measures every little thing we do and blindly trust the data we’re getting.

    The biggest takeaway from all those business seminars will likely be another mindset shift – seeing that starting a multi-million-dollar business is not something reserved to the geniuses of this world, some exclusive few born with a certain understanding or only those with rich parents, but instead is a skill that can be learned. What is takes is some research, finding a mentor, a lot of network and focusing on the right aspects and not losing yourself in the nitty-gritty of menial daily tasks. And most importantly: starting, trying and tinkering with the approach on a daily basis instead of losing yourself in overthinking. And surrounding yourself with like-minded people who share the same approach of “I don’t know what I’m gonna do yet and I don’t have the faintest idea of how I’m gonna make it work, but I’m most definitely set on living my own life and finding my own ways.” That is crucial to keep yourself from giving in to your self-doubts that most certainly will eventually creep up time and again.

    We got less than 2 weeks left – incredible. The mindset shifts we’ve all experienced and the growth we’ve had as individuals and as a group are mind-blowing, but game-wise I feel so far from the hooking point, and business-wise I haven’t even started putting energy into it… It’s not that at the end of those 9 weeks we’ll be the rockstars we want to be; it’s rather that at the end of the formal part of PRS we’ll have opened up our minds to what might be possible and what it takes to get there. Develop the mindset of a rockstar first, then put all your effort into truly building the life of one. Stockholm is almost over, but the journey has just about begun…

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    Sweden #3

    Saturday September 15, 2017.



    I understand why we spend so much time on Rockstar in Sweden, the women are beautiul. This was highlighted on Saturday, when we walked into the club and it was kind of empty, but the women that were there were stunning.

    Within a half hour or so, our table was popping off, and a bunch of us were dancing on the booth bringing girls in and out. Just an awesome party vibe.

    I spent some time walking around with a couple of Rockstars, talking about the most random things we could think of, and to an extent it worked. But nothing was really "hitting". I would have a couple good interactions here and there but it wasn't hitting the way I knew it could. The problem was that I felt like I turned into too much of a “funny” guy, just spouting random crap, instead of bringing masculinity and realness in my conversations.

    This was highlited even further by an instructor who found he had the same problem. He had a smoking hot blonde girl he was with for the entire night and while things would ramp up with them, she would keep telling him she wasn’t going home with him. He realized once it was too late, that she told him this 4/5 times because he was being fun and funny, but not bringing anything that would show who he was. She didn’t see him as a real person.

    It’s interesting to hear about a guy who’s been in this so long is sitll constantly learning. It’s a never ending journey just like life.

    Sunday September 16, 2017.

    The thing I like about this leg of the trip is that it’s much similar to what my real life will look like.

    Vegas and Mykonos were hyper reality. Going out 6, sometimes 7 nights a week plus seminars. There was no time to breathe. Sure there might be times in my life when I go out that much, but the truth is if it was up to me I don't love going to night clubs.

    One of the instructors said the same thing today in seminar. Sure, going to a party with friends or going to a nightclub where he likes the music, but outside of that it's not his thing. And that’s totally fine.

    When I say I don’t love going to night clubs, I mean that it’s fun sometimes and there are nights I enjoy going out more than other, but I'm introverted by nature. There’s guys in this group that are more outgoing than most and who will enjoy it way more than I do and that’s ok. Understanding who we are as a person is a huge part of our journey and is going to help us with dating, but also with everything in life. Instead of trying to jam and round peg into a square hole, we will know where we fit and just slide right in.

    A couple of the guys were going out tonight, but I just didn’t feel up to it. I knew that I could push through it and go out giving it 50% of my best effort, or I could take the night off relax and be 100% ready for the next night out. So that's what I did.

    My feedback from the circle of truth was that I should open up more and getting to know the other guys a bit better. So I messaged another Rockstar who wasn’t going out, went over to his place and we chopped it up. Mostly about our lives pre Rockstar and what it’s going to be like post Rockstar.

    We came to the terrifying realization that there’s only two full weeks left, and the days are going by too fucking fast. But at the same time I get excited about my life after the program because it’s going to be fucking amazing...

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    PR Journal 20 Tuesday Sept 19

    After 7 years, I am ready to stop working on game. Don’t get me wrong, I still have a lot that I want to improve upon. But if I continue to work on those things, the fulfillment that I get from my life is going to decline. Sure, I can keep going out and smashing into really hot models. But if I want to do that, I will need to get a job, because I still have student loans to pay off, and will have little to no money once this program ends. I made a decision for myself that I never wanted to go back to a corporate job. I plan on living at home with my parents once I finish, and from there I will work from what little savings for as long as possible before looking at a freelance job.

    It’s just a matter of what I want my life to look like. I understand that one of my greatest drivers is attaining a sense of freedom in my life, to be able to choose where I live, what I do, who I hang out with. Getting a job satisfies the means of affording all of that, but it will never allow me to decide when I get to do those things. I want to live in a reality where I can live in another country, I can go eat at fancy restaurants, I can go back packing for 4 weeks, I can go spend a month with my family, I can take care of the people around with me without fear of how that will affect my own lifestyle. I can’t do that unless I am in control of both my finances and my time.

    Once I have that control, that is when I will be able to really push the boundaries of what is possible in my life. Because I will have the freedom to invest my time where I want to invest my time. Just from the work and money lens, being able to work at my own endeavor for 8 hours a day is allowing me to build an asset for myself that I can either sell down the line or realize a cash flow from. If I work for someone else, as soon as I leave I am back to square one.

    I can go work out at the gym 7 days a week, devote two hours there, hire a personal trainer, have time and/or money to do my food prep.

    I can afford to hang out with extraordinary people that are used to living a lifestyle that previously was out of my reach.

    When I think about the next time I’m going out or what I’m going to work on next, immediately my focus turns to working on business. This has never happened before. I have always looked at my time and thought about girls, hanging with them, banging with them. But I feel like I’m at a place now where I am comfortable with my skillset, and that by working on building the foundation of my financial future, I will be able to grow even faster when I get back into it. And then maybe a couple years down the line, I can dive back into this feeling fulfilled in the knowledge that I have the rest of my life in order.

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    Blog 21
    Day 53, September 18, 2017
    just 2 weeks left in the program and we are kicking this week off with the mentor seminars and learning how they made their wealth and how we can learn from them and get into similar businesses and do something like them or take help from them to progress in our respective fields. we have three mentors this year and each have been assigned two days of seminars to break down their journey and to learn from them and their experiences. later at night the guys all went out but i just was so tired that i fell asleep quite early. seems like my body is kind of giving up to the 3 hour a night sleep cycle so i just listened to his and pretty much slept fourteen hours.

    Day 54, September 19 2017
    Same mentor's seminar today and we went in depth in topics such as affiliate marketing and copywriting and how we ca use his knowledge to scale our business. I've already made a few pages of notes on my takeaways for my business already.
    At night some of us decided to go check out the strip club scene for a bit before heading to our usual weekday spot. Spoiler alert, it's not worth going there and you are better off just chilling with the boys at the bar close to the hotel like we usually do.

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    Day 54-55 (19 – 20 Sep)

    Hit the gym with one of the Rockstars, it’s always good training with a friend and I love training with this guy. We headed back to seminar for another day of the business mentoring seminar, more great stuff. It’s been great to see all the pieces for online business and lifestyle business thrown up on the board, to give an idea of what’s possible. It’s going to take a lot of hard work and effort, but between my organisational management skills, engineering, general business and marketing knowledge from my MBA, and then the paths these presentations are illuminating, I feel I’m going to succeed, in some form or another. I’m excited for it.

    I didn’t go out again, as I was feeling very tired and just wanted to spend more time with the guys, which was time well spent.

    I feel as if I’m at a point where my game is good enough that I’m hitting diminishing returns on going out and talking to people. Sure, I still learn something from every interaction and every experience is more data points, but I’m sure the next phase of my growth isn’t going to come from game at all; it comes from working on living a full life, one with passion for other things such as my business, community, friendship circle, travel and experiences, fun, family – basically fulfilment in other areas. Improving each of these things will propel my game further; being able to pick up a girl in a bar is just one skillet, it’s one layer to the whole picture of relationships and dating, and that is all one element that bleeds into all of life. I feel it’s time I delve into the deeper layers, and the tangential layers. The skills we’ve learned are applicable in nearly everything in life, because we’ve learned new ways of thinking, being, acting, all centred around giving and growing, that we can literally succeed in anything. As I move into the next phase, I know the skills will still be there, will take work to maintain, but for where I’m at, building a business and a full life is the next step. I’ll still work on elements of my game, such as text and more normal conversation/banter/humour, but it won’t be my sole focus. I know I’ll come back to it.

    We started the next mentor’s presentation, which was another amazing insightful talk. I’m still feeling a bit sick, but I’m getting excited to head out again. Headed out, had a fun night, had some interesting interactions where it was super warm and fun, then when I saw the girls a few minutes later they were extremely cold. Ended up talking to a local and her friend for about 5 minutes and headed back to their apartment.

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    Stockholm Diary #5

    Kinda weird… this doesn’t really feel like Rockstar anymore… it’s more like hanging out with a bunch of really good friends in a nice place with a really chill atmosphere, focusing on building deep bonds, making plans for the future, learning a ton about business and being very mindful about the way you talk, think and feel… nothing like the bonanza of the first 5 weeks, like the non-stop rat race against the clock, running from classes to clubs and back, that fiery grind and intensity… the speed, vibe and focus have changed so much…

    And Stockholm is very different from what we expected. Bars and clubs are small and only have a windows of 3 hours where they get going. 4 nights a week there’s basically not a single location that really gets going and 1 night it’s basically just teenies – so other than daygame and Tinder we only got Friday and Saturday to meet girls, which takes a lot of focus away from game, and instead of putting all our learnings into action and blazing a path of love through the city night in and night out, we are spending most of the nights with great food and deep talks amongst ourselves… a great time, albeit kinda unexpected… let’s see what that final week keeps in store for us… and then there are all the post-official-PRS travel plans… Europe, Asia, party cruises, Tony Robbins events… this year is gonna burn a huge whole in my wallet, but it’s damn well worth it!

    Mental processes are of utmost importance. We’ve been reprogramming so many parts of our brain that had been stuck in the same old and harmful patterns, sometimes for decades, that it takes a lot of constant vigilance, mindfulness and conditioning to keep ourselves from falling back into those old patterns… I’m astonished time and again when someone points out an alternative, much more positive interpretation of my experiences and my learning that my mind simply had completely blocked out out of sheer habit… fascinating… good to see that we’re all getting so much better at seeing the positive side of things and trusting the process.

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    Monday September 17, 2017

    The days themselves are moving slowly, but the days keep zipping by.

    Today is the start of the business portion of the program which was a huge reason why this program was so appealing to me in the first palce. I’ve had dreams of working for myself and creating financial freedom in my life and it's been something that's been gnawing at me for the last couple years, but I've always felt it to be an under developed area of my life. So having a different seminar every day this week that are focused on building a business which is pretty inspiring.

    Outside of the seminar, there's been an increasingly larger focus on getting to know after the circle of truth, which is awesome. Were spending time going for 1on1 dinners, lunches and coffee dates with each other all the time. And it’s awesome since

    I’m really enjoying the time in Sweden. It reminds me of home, and it’s a place I could see my self living at some time in the future. But at the same time this trip to Europe has opened my eyes and I know there’s so much more out there that I want to experience so I want to keep travelling and sampling what’s out there.

    Tuesday September 18, 2017.


    Another inspiring day of business seminars. I left yesterday wanting to get back to the hotel and start working, but there’s so much going on that it isn’t possible. Right now I’m preheating the “idea oven “ for the first project I take on after Rockstar. That’s the best way to look at this part of the program. Preheat the oven, and focus on smashing out the rest of our time in Sweden.


    So when one of the instructors put out a message in the middle of the day about who wanted to go to a Swedish strip club. I replied, yes. I find strip clubs so fun, because the girls there usually can appreciate good banter, and play back at you with some good natured humour. It's a good time.

    We met up after seminar and cabbed to the strip club. We walked in and had to wait in line to pay the cashier. I was first, and instead of waiting for everyone else to pay I went in.

    What I walked into was way more depressing that I was hoping… There were two dancers sitting at the bar, and one girl going through the motions on the pole. They all looked at me like I was a piece of meat, so I walked over and said hi, and they lit up.


    We talked a bit, but the language barrier was a lot. In the middle of the conversation maybe the most beautiful girl I’ve seen since I’ve been on Rockstar walked out of one of the back rooms. Tall, skinny, blonde, pumped full of silicone. I was expecting more of this when I agreed to come out tonight, so i went over to talk to her before she could disapear into one of the back rooms.

    “You can’t just walk by and not say anything, that’s pretty rude.” I said.
    “I’m the manager...”

    Annnnd she walked away. Ok, whatever.

    We hung around the strip club for a while, to get our moneys worth but no matter how long we stayed that was a 75$ cover charge I’ll never get back.

    Some of the other guys were at a different bar so we went to meet up and them. The bar is typically pretty empty, but it's also around the corner from our hotel so we had nothing to lose.

    We walked up and saw that it was packed with mostly women. Which makes sense when one of the instructors told us it’s because there was a Chip and Dales show that night and this was the after party. Perfect.

    I saw a beautiful Swedish girl, and stopped her dead in her tracks. I stared into her blue eyes, and talked to her for a long time. We had a really good connection, and a really good bubble. It was almost like there was no one else around. But I had to break the bubble because i needed to pee like a mother fucker. And she had to find her mom...So I formulated a plan, she would go find her mom we’d meet back at the spot.

    I had a gut feeling this was a bad idea. And when I got back and she was leaving with a Chip and Dales dancer, I knew it was a bad idea.

    Slightly pissed off and determined to have a good night I went inside the bar and found some of the guys. I noticed a girl dancing a couple feet away from me and the guys. I looked away thinking about something to say before I went over to talk to her, and when I looked back, her and her friend were staring at me.

    I pointed at her, and motioned for her to come over and talk to me. She shook her head and motioned for me to go over there.

    She all of five feet away, so I did.

    “It’s pretty rude of you to stare at me and not come over and say hi..” I said

    “It’s pretty rude of YOU, not to come over and say hi.” She said

    “Is this our first fight?”

    “Yes,”

    “Oh I guess we’ll have to have make up sex later.” I said

    She nodded.

    From that point on it was logistics. My roommate was sleeping back in my room, and her house wasn’t an option. I raised my concerns to the guys who were still at the bar, and one of the alumni was nice enough to give me the key to his hotel room which is just across the street from our hotel. Perfect.

    We went there, had our fun, made sure the room was nicer than when we first got there, reminded each other of our names and then went our separate ways.

    Good night.

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    Sept 15 - 16.

    Earlier in the week I meet a girl in the street who lived in Stockholm. The logistics were bad as her german friend had her last night in Stockholm before flying out. They weren’t party girls so I didn’t think it would be easy to split the two girls. Instead I played it cool and concentrated on the long game. I felt the connection was solid enough that I could get my girl to catch up with me alone later in the week. I sent some texts the next day that I wanted to try Swedish meatballs and I had heard of a high end restaurant called Ikea. I wanted her to take me but she had to wear high heels. Another Rockstar helped me with some light sexual humour late one night when she commented she was in bed – I got a good response so had a good feeling it was going to be a green light as long as I didn’t stuff anything up.

    We went to dinner at a good restaurant and the meatballs were amazing. It was Friday night and I wasn’t keen to miss going out with the group. I texted the guys and it was likely we couldn’t get in later, if we wanted to get in the club we needed to go in all together on guest list. I felt my girl was probably ready to straight to hotel but I was doing what I wanted to do and leading her. We went to the club for 45 mins or so. It was early so it was pretty dead so we bounced back to the hotel. When I got outside the club I got the “where are we going” in a quizzical voice shit test. I told her – don’t worry I’ve got this sorted. Later I found she was fine to go to the hotel but her voice tone was just shit testing me.

    We had a couple rounds of close relations before my roommate returns. Conversation is super normal and we make her feel comfortable. If the two boys think its normal, then the girl follows and falls inline to the normal frame. I escalate things sexually again in the dim room, she is turned on. I get out of bed to find a condom. Rockstar problems is when you only have 2 condoms in your wallet and you need to hunt for a 3rd cause you have none left. When I return the girl sees the condom and says “no no no”. She isn’t comfortable yet to have sex less than 2 feet away from my roommate. Again I sexualise physically and turn her on and she can’t resist sex. In her mind she thinks if she is quiet it will be ok. She covers her mouth in an attempt to keep quiet – I make a point of pulling her hand away and telling her I want to hear her. Half way through she lets go of any inhibitions and is as noisy as ever. I get vocal too and after we climax - both me and my roommate make sure its totally normal and talk normally.

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    Day 56-57 (21 – 22 Sep)

    We finished up the second mentors presentation, and one of the instructors jumped in to share his expertise in selling physical products online. Between the three different business presentation topics, we’ve had a great exposure to the whole picture of establishing a business which isn’t so dependent on location, and certainly isn’t trading time for dollars. I’m continually amazed by the amount of talent and knowledge in the room on Rockstar. Some of these guys have never had jobs, never been to university, yet have better business skills than most people in the corporate world, better presentation and teaching skills, and actually work hard and effectively.

    We started the final mentor’s presentation, a very successful traditional businessman who’s been involved in starting and building a lot of companies. It was a great contrast to the online only guys, but it was interesting to see a lot of the principles and mindsets were no different; the tactical challenges were simply different.

    I had my first night out at the premier club here, and it was a bit quiet. There was a big name DJ there (not playing, just to party) so some of the few women there were hovering around near his table. I didn’t really care, I was having a lot of fun with the guys. Besides, after an hour or so, the majority of the women in the club were at our table anyway. I blew my own mind a little this night with a strategic sort of approach. I saw a smoking hot girl in a heated discussion with her friend, but the third friend was just hanging. So I quickly started chatting to the third girl, hit it off, and she was excited to introduce me to her friends. A warm introduction after a few minutes of making a new friend, it couldn’t have gone better. I was hanging out with the hot girl on and off for the remainder of the night.

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    Sweden #4

    Wednesday September 20, 2017

    It’s starting to sink it more and more each day.

    The amount of nights out, and just overall nights, is getting to be fewer and fewer each day. We’re down to our last six club nights… Two weekends left in Sweden and two weekends left with this amazing group. Then it’s over and we continue on our journey.

    It will be interesting to see the growth that we each experience after we go out into the world and continue to grow and evolve. I know for me personally the time after this is going to be huge for me, there's just been so much information thrown at us and not enough time for it to be absorbed. The months and years after is when it will all start to sink in.

    The next week or so is going to be when I start thinking about the next steps for me, and my life after Rockstar.

    An unexpected benefit of this program has been that it really opened my eyes to travelling and how big the world really is. There’s a small group of alumni and instructors who have been travelling non stop for the last year, and they aren’t slowing down any time soon. I have the opportunity to join them, so we got dinner and discussed where I’m at and what I see myself doing after the program ends.

    The thought of being free to travel the world is so appealing, but there’s other things I want to do as well. And the truth is I can’t do everything. At least not right now. I need to put some time into the next week and think about this because it feels like a huge decision right now.

    In the mean time I want to relax and enjoy the last nights out with the incredible group of guys.

    We went out to the more casual relaxed club around the corner from the hotel, and got into the swing of things pretty quickly. It's funny to think about our first few nights out in Vegas, and comparatively it doesn’t take long before the approach anxiety dissipates now. Additionally I’m finding myself in better and deeper interactions earlier in the night than I did even a couple weeks ago when we were in Greece or near the end of Vegas. Which wasn't even that long ago...

    The night didn’t end with anything materializing, except it made me realize that I’m making progress still but if I don't stop and appreciate that my mind discounts it.

    One of the instructors said today that your brain will adapt to the progress you've made quicker than you realize and once it does it will stop seeing the strides you make as major improvements, instead just marginal feats that aren't anything to be happy about. When in reality compared to week one, we've all improved by leaps and bounds and we are on the path to becoming the men we've always wanted to be.

    This is something I will have to remind myself of everyday. Especially once this program is over.

    Thursday September 21, 2017

    Another seminar, another dinner, and a night off from the night clubs. These days just zip by. But I’m appreciating the small moments within them.

    I took some time to go to the hotel gym, steam room, and catch up on some reading. Then a small group of us did some writing, and caught up on computer errands in one of the instructors rooms.

    It's so meanial but these nights are so important for us to bond over now. It’s these moments, where we’re stepping back, getting to know each other and creating a bit of normalcy in such a chaotic program that will bond us for our lives. It’s also allowing us to remember what real life will be like when it’s all said and done. And to be honest it’s where some really great conversations happen. We get to know each other outside of night clubs.

    We worked on our blogs. Talked about the future and shared stories about the past. It’s moments like these that make me appreciate this life changing program.

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    Stockholm Diary #6

    These chicks are weird, man… our relationships with Stockholm is a bit as in game – once you sorta give up on things and just go with the flow and enjoy yourself, great things happen… The first week and a half, Stockholm wasn’t really as promised – the clubs weren’t really crowded, the girls in real life weren’t half as hot as on Tinder, and very few of us could understand those girls… and Friday was the worst night out during the entire program – the clubs were half empty and the girl so unattractive that my wingwoman got furious at me for not pointing out a single girl that I wanted her to help me approach… so, many of the guys kept sharing their disappointment and how they wished we had stayed in Vegas for a week longer… and when you think it all kinda sucks, magic happens. Saturday was by far the best night out so far. V club was packed with smoking hot chicks, our table had a great energy the entire night, spy bar – the afterhours place – was even more jampacked and the night flew by in a breeze… The weird part still is that it seems next to impossible to read interactions with these girls – you can spend the entire night with a girl, make out with her, have her grind on you, have a great, long, deep conversation with her, see the longing in her eyes, even have her admit how much she is turned on… and still for some reason at the end of the night she would decide to go home alone. One girl even got furious when I didn’t wanna kiss her and kept telling me for an hour straight how bad she wanted to sleep with me, but how still she couldn’t… if you think girls at your place are aliens, wait till you see this specimen over here…

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    PR Journal 21 Thursday Sept 21

    Summary of the night before. I think the biggest thing for me was I was always somewhere else. I had something on my mind. I don’t remember what it was, it may have been this girl I was texting. What happens is I get to a place where something starts to take my attention, but when I “finish” or resolve that specific thing, I then leave some of my attention diverted towards that task. I end the day and go out and suddenly I am fragmented in my presence and attention. I realized I was not in the best headspace early on, and so I went out to go talk with people. I wasn’t there totally though. I was still in my head. I could tell because I didn’t totally connect when I was bantering with the girls and people I was meeting. It was the same movements, I went to go talk with the people around me, people I didn’t know, but it didn’t feel the same. Around 4am, this chick came over to me and touched my face on both sides and then was trying to dance into me and just being really fucking touchy. And I wasn’t having any of it. To the point where I wanted to leave the room. She was so fucking annoying I just couldn’t deal. Here I am obviously getting more and more pissed and she is laughing as she just invades my physical space. After that somehow I snapped out of my head. I don’t know what it was. And from that literal moment I could feel my presence had changed. I was much lighter. I could feel girls being pulled into me. I can’t explain it any other way. I was pulling girls into me. That was that. Later in the night I met a girl, who I didn’t end up bringing home, but from the moment we started talking, my presence was magnetic. I was in flow.

    I spent the whole night trying to figure out how to get into state, but I think it comes down to just being able to manage my emotions when I’m out. I’ve mentioned this before, but one of the instructors gave us a list of different things we could be doing in order to be in a better state. Jumping up and down, singing, screaming, dancing, pushups, making faces. And that is the lesson that I keep coming back to, I just need to focus on doing those things while I’m out when I start feeling down. By doing those things, it allows me to get out of my head. And then I am able to be my best self.

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    Day 58 – 60 (23 – 25 Sep)

    Finishing up the final mentor presentation, I’m left with quite a few more questions than when I started. I’ve been interested in business for a long time, and the last few days have been incredible for opening my mind to all the possibilities for the future; it’s just a matter of setting down a path and working my ass off.

    I’ve also been getting some of my experience and learnings down on paper, working with one of the instructors on a tinder presentation. In a lot of ways I don’t realise how much I know about all sorts of topics until someone asks, then I’m able to make the linkages for what I’ve done that works well. I’ve found this a lot when people ask questions on how I do certain things when I’m out; at first I’m not really aware what I’m doing that really works, but when someone asks and I think about it, I realise the things I do that work, so I could double down on it. Perhaps I need to reflect and visualise more, but also hang out more with curious inquisitive friends who are good at noticing different elements. This is the power of having many minds on a task.

    We headed out, and I went to small exclusive little underground deep house club, which was really cool. There weren’t too many smoking hot girls but hanging out with the small crew we had there and just dancing, having fun, being the party, was a good time. On the way to the afterhours club, I saw two incredibly beautiful Swedish girls walking the other way, and I started chatting to them and got the number of the girl I was really interested in. They were heading to some other bar, but shortly after they messaged me and we met up. The more time I spent with this girl the more I realised how much I really liked her. We spent most of the rest of the night together, getting closer and closer. She was worried about her friend all night (she was hanging around with a sleazy odd guy), but I was just helping her handle it and being a masculine guy. I realised in the moment that this girl is the first since my ex girlfriend that I really felt the pull on my heart strings. In one way, this was amazing to see for me, because it’s been so long, it’s good to feel like that. In another way, its tough because she lives here. We got so close, but at the end of the night we really didn’t want to leave each other but I worked out she probably had a boyfriend. So I asked, and she told me she did and it wasn’t good for her, but I just couldn’t bring myself to keep pushing it. So I sadly said goodbye. I really want to see her again, but I don’t expect I will, despite there being an extremely strong connection.

    Afterward, around 6am, I headed to the fast food place to meet up with the guys, when I sat next to a cute girl. We started chatting, and the restaurant closed, and I ended up taking her back to the hotel. Unfortunately my roommate was asleep, so we just hung out in someone elses room for a while before I got her an uber. I really should have tried harder to find a place to be alone, but at 7am after a massive night I wasn’t really that interested in pushing further.

    The next day we headed to a theme park to hang out and have fun, but unfortunately someone had booked the whole thing out and it was closed. So we headed to a restaurant to hang out for the afternoon, and had an easy night watching some movies.

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    Stockholm Diary #7

    A few more days and the official part of this big fucking adventure is gonna be over, I’m officially gonna be 50 grand poorer and a lot richer in experiences, wisdom, confidence, freedom and happiness. And we’ll most likely never ever gonna be together with this exact group of people… kinda hard to wrap my head around that fact.

    Other than during the 2-3 big nights out a week, game isn’t much a focus anymore, or at least not the main focus. We got business lectures, final instructor feedback, day trips, shopping trips, photo trips, Tinder lectures, fashion lectures, travel planning sessions… the whole shebang. And besides that, we try to both maximize time spent with the group as well as have deep 1-on-1 conversation with every last one of the boys truly get to know each other and form bonds that last a lifetime. And then there’s all the planning for the coming months – whether or not to start a new business or keep the old job, where to live and to travel, how to give back to the rockstar community and keep this program alive, how to network with the boys and the alumni, what self-development and game seminars to attend, what parties to jointly go to, which brothers to visit, how to meet old friends and family into all those travel plans, how to integrate everything we’ve learned into our regular life and how to expand on our regular life and build a new focus and custom-made lifestyle for ourselves…

    Every day, the group feels more like a group. Subconsciously, we seem aware of the fact that those are the last days on this leg of the program that is the kickoff for a new life, and factor that into every conversation with the boys. Being around the group feels more relaxed than ever, conversations are full of genuine interest and appreciation, and we have learned the skill of being at ease around people we don’t really feel a deep connection with. Great atmosphere to be in and to end the trip with. Looking forward to all the growth that is to come over the next months.

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    Sweden #5

    Friday September 21, 2017.

    Lately I've been wondering what would happen if I didn't get accepted onto this program.

    At the time my thinking was "OK if I don't get on my life will continue. The world will keep spinning, and I'll still progress towards my goals..."

    That might have been right but holy shit. If I didn't get on this program this would have been so different. The fact that I'm on this program surrounded by the most imspiring group of guys I've met is something I'm humbled by and grateful for everyday.

    It's week 8 and I’m still learning a lot about myself and what I'm capable of. I'm still pushing myself at every turn. We've got two weekends left so I'm not going to stop that now.


    We might be a couple of weeks off in the timing that we came to Sweden. It seems like the party season is winding down, and winter is coming. Right now it’s clearly fall, and the attendance at bars and night clubs is less than what I thought it would be. This was a rainy September Friday night, and some would say it was dead, but the Rockstars made Lemonade.

    I managed to find a girl I was interested in, but she didn't speak English...like AT ALL. A good opportunity for me to use my body language and eye contact to communicate with her. Which worked surprising well. Whenever we needed to communicate with words we would speak through Google Translate (a tactic lots of other guys have used since we’ve been in Europe).

    The club was starting to empty out, so I pulled out my phone and typed into the translator…

    “Get your coat, we’re going back to the hotel for an afterparty now.”

    It spat out some Russian characters, and she nodded like she understood what I was getting at. I took her hand and started walking out of the club to the hotel.

    We got half way there and I could sense the confusion on her face, so I pulled out the phone and handed it to her. She typed that she needed to find her friends.

    "No problem." I said taking her back to the club so she could find her friends.

    I was fine with this because meanwhile a girl I had met the previous week at the same bar was messaging me on Instagram throughout the night. And now she was asking if I wanted to meet up. It was close to 04:00 am and I was done trying to communicate with the Russian girl at this point.

    I sent Russia the address of the hotel and half an hour later she was waiting outside. An hour or so after that she left again.

    Saturday September 23, 2017

    What a night.

    This was defianatly the best night I’ve had out in Sweden, and probably top 3 on the whole program.

    We arrived at Wall, the more upscale of the clubs that we go to, and the vibe was instantly awesome. The music was kicking, the girls were talkative, and all of the boys were in a good place. We had a bigger group than usual, and we were firstly focused on having fun, then the secondary thoughts were about anything else.

    We started talking to girls, but it was different. We all had the mentality that our table was the best party in the club (it was) so when we talked to girls it was clear in our subcommunications that it didn't matter if they stayed or left because we would have fun regardless. It was effortless.

    Around 03:00 we left and went to an after hours bar. Because we had a table we by passed a huge crowd of people who had been waiting in line forever. It was like we're celebrities.

    I was fully ready to shut that bar down too. But around 04:30 a girl I had met the previous night messaged me saying she was across the street. I said goodbye to the boys and went out to meet her. We walked around the city a little bit and then took an uber over to the hotel.

    An hour later when she was ready to leave, the hotel room was unrecognizeable. The beds pushed apart, the sheets were on the floor along with the pillows, the nightstand was flipped upside down any clothes I had we're strewn everywhere.

    First impressions tell a lot about people, but as I was looking at the bite marks on my shoulders I realized that you don't really know what someones like until they're naked.

    I should call this girl again...

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    Monday 9/18/17 Post

    Friday morning I was feeling a bit of “Post Circle of Truth Blues”. It’s hard to sit there in that chair and hear things about yourself that you don’t want to hear or acknowledge. Most people live their entire lives without being aware of a lot of this stuff about themselves. Most friends won’t tell you this stuff. Most family won’t tell you this stuff. Most co-workers won’t tell you this stuff. People, for the most part, simply don’t want to hurt other peoples’ feelings. It’s quite a gift for other people to be brutally honest with you in a caring supportive setting.

    Friday was the sex seminar. People took turns talking about their different experiences. Many different techniques were discussed. The overall message was about using the “Full Spectrum” of sex. On the one end, being much more dominant with women in bed. On the other end, being much more connected emotionally. It’s safe to say that everyone in the room could embrace being more dominant in the bedroom.

    Friday night we had a table at V. I was feeling quite emotionally flat. Despite this, I managed to have several good interactions. Although I wasn’t able to pull a girl to my hotel, I did manage to help out a fellow rockstar in need of a wing. This allowed him to get his girl back to his hotel.

    During the seminar on Saturday, the instructors all shared a bunch of stories from years past. It was one of the best collections of stories I have ever heard. To be able to be in the room when such stories are being told is a pretty cool thing.

    Saturday night was Cafe Opera. It was a fun night just hanging out with the guys. Not too many quality interactions to speak of, but a fun night nonetheless.

    Sunday night, I was going to take a nap at 9 PM and go out later. I woke up at 8 AM the next day. I guess I needed some sleep.

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    Wednesday 9/20/17 Post:

    Monday’s seminar was all about text game. Many people consider the presenter to be the best in the game with this stuff. Many examples were given. Everything from fun and flirty, to very deep, to very sexual. It’s pretty amazing how so much of the “heavy lifting” of game can be handled with good texting skills.

    Monday night, a few of us went out to an early dinner. Some of the guys opted to go out later to various bars and such. I was still feeling quite tired. Starting to think that my body is trying to fight off something, a cold maybe.

    Tuesday’s seminar was given by one of the mentors. It was all about his story- how he got started in business, both his failures and successes.

    After seminar, a few of us went for a light dinner. Some of the guys had plans later to go to a strip club. Not caring anything about going to strip clubs anymore these days, I opted out.

    A few of us opted not to go out Tuesday night. Some of us just hung out in one of the hotel rooms for awhile.

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    Friday 9/22/17 Post:

    Wednesday seminar was day 2 of the first mentor to present. He went much more in depth about exactly what he does and how he does it. It was interesting to get a look behind the scenes of how some of this stuff works.

    My energy has been extremely low. I no longer think I am just fighting off a cold. I have been feeling very flat emotionally. Lethargic. Low energy. Depressed. Disconnected. Very much stuck in my head about so many things. I have been beating myself up for feeling this way. This has only made things worse. I have been finding it increasingly difficult to stay awake for an entire seminar. Coffee and Red Bull seem to have lost their effect on me.

    My tendency when I feel this way is to isolate myself from others. Part of this is that I don’t want people to see me when I am at my worst. Part of this is also that I don’t want to infect others with any negative energy. I don’t want to be the guy that brings down the group in any way.

    I was simply exhausted Wednesday night. I knew that there was no chance of having any fun at all going out. I made the decision to stay in. I know that it was the right decision for me.

    Thursday’s seminar was about some interesting ways to do business on the internet.

    Thursday night a few of us grabbed an early meal. Some of the guys went out a bit later. I opted to stay in.

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    Monday 9/25/17 Post:

    Friday’s seminar was another one of the mentors showing some more about their business.

    My struggles seem to be getting worse. I am exhausted. Feeling quite down. It’s become increasingly apparent to me how much I struggle with my state. It is the overriding factor in what I struggle with.

    I must learn how to maintain a more consistent state.

    A few of us grabbed an early dinner at Vau De Ville - Swedish meatballs.

    Friday night was Cafe Opera. Of course, I struggled to keep my state up. I wound up leaving near closing time. I opted not to go to the after club.

    My emotional state seemed to deteriorate even more on Saturday. A few of us went out for dinner, but I decided not to go to the club Saturday night.

    Sunday was to be the day we all went to the amusement park: Grona Lund. We all met outside the hotel around 2 PM to start walking to the park. We finally get there after about a 30 minute walk, only to find that the park was closed for the day. After another 30 minute walk, we wound up going to an outdoor clubby-type restaurant.

    Maybe all that walking did me some good. I felt a little bit better later that evening. I wound up meeting the fellas out for coffee. Later, we went to some bar and hung out for a few drinks. It was cool to just hang out with the guys in a more relaxed, casual atmosphere.

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    Wednesday 9/27/17 Post:

    I reached out to somebody for a Skype therapy session. I have doubled my efforts with regard to emotional conditioning. I have come to realize that physical exhaustion, coupled with massive uncertainty, combined with some perhaps outcome-dependent expectations have all contributed to my difficulties maintaining my emotional state.

    I have lately really enjoyed the more relaxed-casual environment that Stockholm has been as compared to Las Vegas.

    There has been a lot more time to hang out and bond/chill with the guys. There have been many lunches and Joe and the Juice, many coffees at Espresso House, and a few Thai meals at Koh Phangan.

    I will miss that time together when this all comes to an end in a few days.

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    Stockholm Diary #8

    Where the circle of truth is all black, the circle of appreciation is all white. It’s amazing how both being critiqued to the core without holding back as well as being showered with love can bring the group closer together. The lesson being: it’s not what you say that counts, it’s whether it’s authentic and whether it’s coming from a place of love.

    It’s been amazing to see how much the boys appreciate the effort I have put into this program and into growing. It’s an eye-opening learning for me to see that people can at the same time bash me for some actions of mine for more than 2.5 hours and just a short 2 weeks later can shower me with praise for everything I have contributed to the group and how much of an example for dedication I have been. It’s great to get the confirmation that all my hard work and conditioning have paid off, that not only has the progress that I have seen in myself been real and not only existing in my head, but the guys have seen so much more progress in me that I have been capable of seeing myself or have allowed myself to see. It reinforces my motivation to keep pushing to hear that from the outside looking in, my game has become fucking rock-solid, when from the inside I still feel very much lost and like driving blind most of the time. Most likely my actions have evolved so much that my brain just has a hard time keeping up… overall, I feel like that dam is filling up, though I have no idea when it’s gonna burst. I feel like I’m getting closer and closer to that wall that’s been blocking me since forever, which is why it often feels scarier than ever. But I have developed the capacity to take a step back in those moments and see the bigger picture – that that fear is part of the process and is actually a guide light in which direction to move. Conditioning is paying off tremendously – I am still experiencing the same fears and doubts as ever, but I have gotten so much better at catching and stopping them before they can take a life of its own, and for the first time ever in my life I have found a reliable method to boost my state, fill me with optimism and make me smile. Exactly what I need to keep going and keep growing. The road is still long and partly obscure, but the future is bright.

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    Journal 20 September 18, 2017
    Getting settled into Stockholm Sweden. It is not what I envisioned. The city is super clean and there are some beautiful women here. I have made several approaches in the day time here and they have went rather well. The girls are friendly and have added a few on facebook here and there. It has not led to any dates yet but there is still time. The clubs are a different vibe. I am making approaches like I did in Vegas but things just are not clicking. Some girl are receptive but then something happens and they disappear or lose interest. My fellow rockstars are having the same experiences, well some any way. A few are still pulling girls, they are the guys that have been pulling since the program started. They are good looking guys that had good game coming into the program. My game was decent and I had some success in Vegas and on the road trip but it is a lot harder here for some reason. I know it will click eventually but I’m ready any time now. There are some beautiful women here but there is everywhere in the world I have been, including the United States. In fact I think there is more beautiful in the United States. I don’t see me ever wanting to live in Stockholm Sweden. It is pretty strict getting into the clubs if you are not on a list or part of the in crowd. If they think you are drunk even if you haven’t been drinking you might as well forget about getting in. The regular pubs welcome you in but the more popular places definitely don’t make you feel welcome.

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    Journal 22 September 23, 2017
    I feel like Sweden does not live up to its hype. I was under the impression that everyone would just kill it in Stockholm. The majority of the guys have expressed the same frustration. There are a handful of guys doing really well, but the majority is struggling. The girls here are really flighty. I was joking with the guys that we all need to carry Ritalin to give to the girls after we start talking to them so they will actually stay and not run off. It just seems the girls have a very short attention span. I have been having a good time hanging out with the guys and getting to know them better. We have been meeting at night before we go out at a coffee house and having coffee then going to a pub next door and having drinks. Last night a few of us went to the pub and took a seat and I sat beside an attractive girl and started chatting to her. She was sitting by herself on her iPad and I just assumed she was working. An instructor looked over and noticed she was on tinder and he told me. I looked and saw it was a fact. I kept talking to her and she told me she was waiting on a friend she had known for a few years. I told her I was waiting on a Tinder date then she started opening up to me. She told me she was waiting on a guy she met on Tinder and had actually never met him before. I continued chatting her up and touching her more and more and she was responding well. I told her we were going to the Soap Bar and she said she loved that place. I told her to come with us and then her Tinder date started calling. I told her not to answer it and she didn’t. He rang her off the hook but I was determined to get her to come with me. I told her I was staying at the Nobis Hotel and she commented that it was a nice hotel. She said she had never been and I told her I was taking her there to show her the best view of Stockholm. She agreed but then started telling me we were not going to have sex and she didn’t know why I was taking her there and on and on. I kept leading her and telling her of course we were not going to have sex I’m not that kind of guy. As soon as the elevator door closes I push her against the wall and start kissing her. We get to my room and I do the same. Then push her down on the bed and started taking her clothes off. We didn’t go all the way due to the timing but it was a happy ending for me and a learning lesson.

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    Journal 23 September 25, 2017
    It has been a unique experience here in Sweden. Last night we went to a really cool club called the Wall. It was a good night. I felt great, everyone was partying and having a good time. I approached two girls and they responded really well. A fellow rockstar came and winged for me and we pulled them to our table. We were dancing and this girl had a great sense of humor which is unusual in Sweden. I started roleplaying a little and putting her in the girlfriend frame. We danced and held hands and had a really good time. I knew this was going to be my night. Her and her friend stayed at our table for a good hour and her friend was dancing on the seat with my friend. What could go wrong? As soon as I thought I had this nailed down the girl just walked off. She never said a word. Her and her friend just walked away never to be seen again. I didn’t try to make any sense of it I just chalked it up as another typical flighty Swedish girl. I kept approaching and talking to girls. I talked to some hotties too. I had a make out session with a former model and then she flew the coup. It’s tough to keep these Swedish girls around for very long. After the Wall closed we migrated to Spy Bar and it was packed. People everywhere. The dance floor was a sea of people weaving back and forth. I approach a couple of cute girls and hit it off with them and we head to the dance floor. We get in the middle of the floor and almost get separated due to the amount of people. I was in the middle of them and they were both hugging all over me and my mind is thinking two at a time tonight. It didn’t work but I knew it was possible and will keep that in mind for the future.

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    Journal 24 September 27, 2017
    Finally some Swedish breakthroughs. I think day game is easier and the girls here respond better. I haven’t worked on day game in a while. I enjoy day game just as much or more than night game. I am disappointed we haven’t covered day game at all in this program. Any day game we have practiced has been on our own. I expected a few days covering this but It’s trial and error pretty much. I have a credit with Lovesystems so I plan on cashing that in on a day game workshop. When you stop a girl here in Sweden in the day she is not flighty like in the clubs. I have had a lot more success doing day game as far as getting Facebook contact and using banter. In the clubs, whether it be Sweden or wherever the girls are going to have their guards up. A few of us went out the other day of the evening and made some approaches. We started out taking turns but then our group started dwindling down. It ended up being just three of us and we approached every decent looking girl on the streets for a good couple of hours. I don’t ask for numbers here just because I’m not sure how texting works here with an American number. We got a few Facebook contacts in the streets then we called it quits. Tuesday night we went out and put our noses to the grindstone again. We split the class because the clubs are so small and we don’t want to just take over and burn it down within the first five minutes. I had some great interactions and got blown out a few times as expected. I didn’t pull from the club but had a great night with friends. I have learned to get facebook names so at the end or all during the night you can send out messages looking for a meet up. I sent those out and didn’t check it until I woke up and had a couple responses that were definitely green but I plan on hitting them up again and see where it goes.

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    Entry # 23

    Sep 16th

    Stockholm Day 5:

    Club V: A very retooled attitude today after the circle of truth. I really decided to detach from the outcome and have fun with the guys. This is the hottest club in Stockholm and I definitely see why. Even Vegas did not have such a concentration of hot women. I did not snipe or go out on the prowl. I simply hung out at the table when a really hot girl at the next table asked me for a lighter. Turns out her and her friend are Russian, I really did not have to do too much to get her hooked. Just not try too hard. Keep my presence and feel my masculinity and (as seems to be unavoidable in this town) get her a few drinks from my table. We were really hooking, but nothing can be seamless and her considerably less attractive friend created a logistical problem. I spoke to one of the instructors and basically continued to escalate on my girl. At some point I HOD'd and she freaked out and ran away. I let her and then came back and recovered fairly easily.

    Unfortunately, I did not control her EtOH intake soon enough. She was begging me for more drinks and I finally gave in and poured her a glass of champagne. As soon as she started drinking, I realized what a mistake it was and finished it for her. Unfortunately she was pretty drunk and this point

    Her friend continued to be an issue, but what are Bros for... and one of fellow rock stars completely captivated the friend and eliminated her from the picture. I got my girl into the cab and to the hotel. Unfortunately, by the time we got to the hotel, she was way too drunk. I let her sleep it off, sharing a tiny twin bed. She finally left around 7am, so I could get my standard 4 hours of sleep.

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    Entry # 24

    Sep 19:

    Stockholm day 6:

    Rough night @ Opera:

    Small club with so-so ratio. The first 6 that I spoke with as a warm up... One of the girls friends made me give her my # though I dont remember exactly what I did. Texted back and forth for a bit.

    Had an amazing eye fuck with a 9 and got her instagram but she got pulled away. That was real hot and I did not do anything aside being present and in having hardcore eye contact. I could have totally kissed her, but wanted to keep the tension. Fuck.... how do I convert these?

    Rose: Started talking to a 9.2 and she remembered me from lunch at the Poke Bowl. She guessed that I was Jewish. WTF!?! Had I been not in Stockholm (where I instructed to expect short and flaky interactions) I would have led her away. Should not have let her walk away! Next time, lead

    Total eyefuck with a Girl outside in the smoking section. I totally felt my masculinity and stillness and she just would not walk away. Even when she found her bf-ex current bf whatever he was, she kept staring. I even told her that in nature, when animals stare @ each other for more than 10 seconds, they decide if they will fuck or kill each other. I was about to take her inside and buy her a shot, when I got a text from the girl from last night that she was in the club, so I abandoned the eye fuck because of the fuckups I had in Mykonos. Should not have bailed... Freaking girl from last night was not even there.

    My energy is a bit too low for this place and every girl seems to have ADD. What is good, however is that Im approaching with much less hesitation, sometimes not even realizing that I'm doing it. Just like I did with the Poke bowl girl: What does the Poke Bowl girl experience tell me though: I”m noticed and for good reasons. Hot girl like that does not notice random guys eating lunch. Hot dude like me, should approach these women during the day time and in the street.

    Stockolhm Day 7:

    A really productive day of just hanging out with a bunch of PR brothers, instructors and alums in various coffee shops and restaurants. I should have done a bit more of this on the roadtrip. Our conversations flow from game to travel, technology, career etc.

    Sweden Day 8:

    Tuesday was supposed to be the slowest night in Stockholm. Regardless, the focus has shifted, to hanging out with the guys, really getting to know each other. This includes alumni and instructors. I'm working on making the best of this time and have gotten to know a couple of alumni. Much like my class, they are fascinating people. I feel fortunate that I will have a semi-empty apt in NYC and I feel comfortable inviting any of these guys over when they are in town.

    As the day hang progresses to evening, we went to a local pub and then back to Soap Bar, with the expectation of another slow night. Thats the thing about PR... its ok to have expectations, but it is also very important to disengage from them at a moments notice. Soap bar was hopping with Chippendales dancers and tons of women who just got back from a show. We were having a good time here and for once Swedish women's oblivion to sarcasm was a great benefit. I'm still in pretty good shape from the workout program and a bunch of them became convinced that I was a Chippendale dancer. At first I hooked up with a tall blonde MILF who was there with two daughters. Interesting experience. Still, women here have ADD and its hard to keep an interaction going. Later in the night I saw a very attractive woman dancing with a guy as if they were bf/gf. Two minutes later, she was alone and started talking/dancing with her. Things escalated quickly (not meaning much as Swedish women dont like to do much PDA) and I had to find all her possessions scattered around the bar and lead her out.

    Things got very interesting when we got to my room. While I had some plans for us, it seemed that all she wanted to do was wrestle, which was fun for a while. She became increasingly more aggressive and while naked wrestling can be fun, it got very rough on a tiny bed in a tiny Swedish hotel room. Once she started aggressive biting and drew blood, I had to take full and physical control of the situation. She absolutely loved it and the rest of the night consisted of slightly different naked physical activities

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    Entry # 25:

    Sep 21:

    Opera:

    Kind of a crappy night despite burning down the place to the last hour. Met a girl who knows more about PR than me via Alumni. Appeared to be an unapproachable girl in an amazing kind of way. Went back to the after hours that she recommended and was gaming alone for he rest of the night. Than is when it fucking hit me. I still suck at alone game. It may as well be my first day at game ever. Shudders of terror creeping into the newly fortifying roots of self confidence. I'm not ready to leave. I'm gonna slip back into my old me. Holly fuck. I have not felt this kind of anxiety in forever and I'm very seriously reconsidering my plans for life after this. I mean..wtf..earlier today I was thinking about how this cannot go on much longer, if just because my job is such a huge definition of who I am. Now I'm ready to say “screw it” and go on the lam for another 8 months... Lots of things to consider.

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    Entry # 26

    Sep 23:

    Wall/Spy: We had an awesome night. Went to the hottest club and the hottest after hours in Stockholm. Gorgeous and friendly women everywhere. Easy to talk to; hard to keep in one place for more than 6 minutes. I did bring a girl home however. I think I'm starting to get this. A very binary model here...Not terribly different from standard game, BUT you HAVE TO LEAD in a much more inconspicuous way... and YOU DONT READ the what she gives you back. If she's around it's a green light. But even if shes trying to leave.... she's just messing with you, testing you. Just lead the deal... Leading is still what makes me feel awesome and masculine. though things are way more subtle here. However the primary principle doesn't recede: FUCKING OPEN ALL THE TIME.

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    PR Journal 22 Saturday Sept 23

    One of the biggest pieces of feedback from my circle of truth was that I put too much pressure on myself. This comes out when I talk to girls, especially when I am texting. If I am in a normal in person conversation with a girl, then I have a much easier time just being myself and being open. I’m not trying to do anything except connect(well at least some of the time, sometimes I get in my head, especially if she is hot). As soon as I get on my phone, I start to try to think about what I need to say. Which is exactly what you do not want to do when you talk with someone. I think that’s it. That’s why I struggle so much to continue relationships with girls after I meet them. I meet a girl, it’s on. We have chemistry. She’s someone I want to see again. She wants to see me again. Then I text her aaaaaaaand there it goes. Have a nice life. Wow. My mind is being blown as I write this. For 3 years I have been going out with the intention of gaming and meeting girls. If I get a girl’s number, and I don’t sleep with her that night, the chances that I see her again are slim to none. If she responds to going on a date right away, then it becomes a maybe. But the notion of gaming girls over time with text messages doesn’t exist to me.

    It all goes back to being authentic. The reason I have all my success with girls on the first night is because when I am in the moment I don’t have a chance to consciously think about what I am doing, saying, being. My true identity is front and center. And obviously it’s an identity that girls align with. On the other hand, when I text I put so much pressure on myself to make it happen, I immediately start to plan out what I should say, how I should say it. Any girl is smart enough to feel when I am being inauthentic. She can feel that I am trying to illicit a reaction from her. And so she stops talking to me. I get it. It makes sense. Fuck me it all seems so plain as day when I write this, and yet this has been my struggle since I got to college, hell since I found Love Systems. My next step is just to text what I feel in the moment. I know I’m someone that people want to be around at my best, so instead of trying to figure out what to say, just text away and see what happens.

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    PR Journal 23 Tuesday Sept 26

    When I was in college I rushed Sigma Chi fraternity. I remember being asked why I wanted to be in the fraternity and I would say that I wanted a brotherhood of guys, people I could hang out with and grow with that held a similar set of ideals and values. What I really wanted was to fucking rage and bang sorority chicks. Looking back, even if I didn’t know it at the time, what I needed was exactly what I kept saying. I just wanted to have a group of guys that loved me and who I could share my life with.

    So much of this program focuses on game, going out, getting better with women. In the first weeks, the guys talk about how hard it is to see the program end. Not because of the game aspect, although going out 3-5 nights a week is fun as fuck. You come onto this program with a bunch of strangers you’ve never met, and by the end of it you have brothers for life. Leaving those guys, being removed from this environment is going to be the most difficult part of this program ending. There will never be another time in my life when I will be the focus of a program built to develop who I am as a man surrounded by equally as dedicated and driven men who love me and want to see the best in me. I think that’s all anyone wants when they think of their friends and connections. To be surrounded by people who love and care for me. Sure, having women in there is one aspect of that, but personally I have found a greater amount of both fulfillment and peace in being present with the guys on this program. Every night we have been given that has been optional to go out, I have instead spent just hanging out with the guys. Because when I look back on all of this, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years down the road, I probably won’t remember all the girls that I talked with while I was out. But I will never forget the moments that I spent being with the people that I love, my brothers, my fellow Rockstars. And as hard as it is, I take solace in the knowledge that this is only the beginning of our journey. This is not goodbye, but until next time, when I know we will each be even more than what we left this program as.

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    Day 61 – 62 (26 – 27 Sep)

    We had our final game debriefs, and talked about all the progress we’d made and where the next big components of growth will come from. For me, my game has come a long way to the point where it’s something I don’t need to focus on anymore; I can meet and bring the quality of women I want into my life, given enough opportunity to come into contact with them. Sure, there is always more elements to work on and refine, and I will continue to do so, but I’m happy with where it’s at. The major area I still need to work on for the longer game, which will have flow over to the front end, is relating my story and my depth of character in shorter periods and continuing to build that ‘I’ve just met a special guy’ feeling in the people I come into contact with. More broadly than game, I still need to work on asking more questions, being more open to listening and not being so eager to share my thoughts, viewpoints and opinions. I need to continue to inspire and lead by example. There are many more, and this growth path is lifelong, but I’m excited to continue on the path.

    The following day we headed to the lakehouse in the countryside, which was a great day out of the city, by some picturesque views with the best people I know. We had a few drinks, shared some food, and hung out to talk about life and just be together. Getting there and back was an adventure in itself. I’m going to miss all of these guys so much.

    That night we headed out, and had a fun night. During the week, in Sweden, mostly young university students are out, so it’s a very different crowd that requires high energy and talking to people is all about the fun, banter, excitement, and attention spans are very short. People here like to get as drunk as possible too, which is similar to back home, but I find myself not wanting to be around that anymore. My relationship with alcohol has completely changed during this program; Australian culture drinks heavily, and I was part of the for many years, but I much prefer now to have nothing and just get my pump from talking to people and dancing, and when I do drink, it’s one or two with close friends hanging out. At one point in the night I ran into the stunning little blonde girl I met a few nights before, with her friend. I grabbed Andrzej and we all headed to an after hours spot, where we hung out for a while before heading back to the hotel together. I noticed I could have stayed with a few other gorgeous girls I met that night, but found myself wanting more time with this girl. I can tell something in me is searching for deeper connections, and perhaps this has been exacerbated by the fact that interacting in Sweden is very surface level until you’ve slept with someone a few times. I know I’m looking forward to getting home and builder deeper connections, going on real dates, meeting people and not having to make it happen that day or night. It may sound like bullshit, but at some point, sleeping with more girls really doesn’t move the needle in terms of growth nor happiness; I’ve been at that point for a while and am just searching for meaning, searching for deeper connection.

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    Sweden #6

    Sunday September 24, 2017

    I woke up feeling tired as hell, sore, and somewhat sick. But the weekend I just had was worth every penny of that shitty feeling I have now. It’s the second last weekend in Sweden there’s no holding back.

    After nine weeks on this program I’ve realized I get sick after 2/3 days of no sleep. It makes sense seeing as I fell asleep at 5/6 am a couple nights in a row, so my body is going to start breaking down in minor ways. It’s just an inconvience more than anything. But I told our group Doctor about my breakthrough discover of the corelation between lack of sleep and getting sick...


    “You’re very observant…” He said.

    Today was a scheduled day off from seminar, as we were going to the theme park.

    I tried to limit what I knew about this program before I came onto it. I avoided a lot of videos and especially the previous years journals. Just because I didn’t want to have expectations that were impossibly high to match (this worked because my expectations have been exceeded), but one of the things that slipped through the cracks was that we would be spending a day at Grona Lund, the Swedish Disneyland.

    I was excited. I used to love Disneyland when I was a kid, and a part of me still enjoys themeparks. But when we got there it was closed. See what happens when you have expectations?

    Instead we hung out on the patio of a water front restaurant and had a couple drinks and ate dinner.

    Later that night a couple Rockstars and myself got together to watch a Disney movie. I was blown away by how deep it was, and how profound the message was.

    After that, some of the guys went out, but at this point in the program I don’t want to throttle it too hard. There’s still another week left for that. I got some much needed rest.


    Monday Septermber 25, 2017.

    We had an interesting seminar today.

    A dating and relationship guru from North America skyped in to talk to us about topics like open relationships, and polyamoury.

    Even before this program I've had quite open thoughts about relationships and I think that all this did was show that there's other people out there that are trying things that are different than the commonly practiced monogomy model.It was refreshing to hear.

    This can be applied to many areas of life,not just relationships. For everything you can think of there's people out there that are trying new things and exploring different ways of living that are outside the norm. It’s there if we want it. We don’t have to go back into society and do what everyone else does, and I think that's been a huge lesson since being accepted on this program.

    We can create a life that's exactly the way we want it.

    After seminar myself and two of the guys grabbed dinner and talked about where we see ourselves going in a week when this is all said and done. It’s good to talk to these because of all the guys in the group I feel like the three of us are in very similar places. Because of where we were coming into the program and how we’ve developed over the last nine weeks.

    Conversations like this are exciting, and they make me a little bit less devastated that I’ll be leaving this group in a week.

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    Stockholm Diary #9

    This is it. The very end of 9 weeks of madness… a few more hours and we will start the gargantuan final party, blowing more on a single epic night out than I would usually spend in 2 months on clubbing… been an epic summer, deserves a firework ending…

    Amazing how natural interactions with girls can feel when I’m in the right state. When I feel masculine, bold and confident, care less about the outcome of any given interaction than about having fun being in it, when I dare showing who I am and dare showing my attraction for someone, it is amazing to see how many girls are open to talking to me and amazing to feel how many girls are sexually attracted to me. And it is amazing how unfazed I can be by any and all shit-tests and objections they may throw at me, because I know my self-worth and I know that I will enjoy just being myself… there’s still a ton of stuff to work on mechanics-wise and to solidify my newfound inner game self-images, but it was hugely rewarding to get a glimpse of whom I can be and who I already have become (and maybe always was) when I allow myself to be it.

    Awesome to see what the circle of appreciation has done for the group. Completely counterproductive at first that 2 things so black and white as the circle of truth and the circle of appreciation could both knit the group together so much closer, yet when you think about it, it seems so obvious – being authentic, opening up and speaking from the heart is what makes you relatable and forms connections. Add to that the fact that all of us are slowly realizing that these are probable the last days of our lives that we are around all of these amazing people at the same time, and it is crystal-clear that everyone goes the extra mile to tell everybody else just how much you appreciate them… sure, we still like having girls around, having sex and creating everlasting memories to tell stories about, but at the core right now it is all about this amazing group of friends for life that we are so lucky to have found and so grateful to have worked so hard to bond with. Rockstars for life!

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    Day 63 – 64

    If the Circle of Truth was the sobering smack down we all needed, the Circle of Appreciation was the pick me up and warm embrace on the other side of that, with a look at how far we’ve come. It was heart warming to go around the room for each brother and tell them all the amazing things we think and feel about them. The trouble I had was expressing so much love and admiration for each person in words, in a succinct manner, during the sharing circle. I feel like I left a lot out for every person, and I think everyone was similar. I’m ok with that, because I know what all of these guys mean to me, and that I’ll show them that over the coming weeks, months and years that lay before us. Plus, we all get it. We all know we are one, we each would do anything for each other; it’s this knowing look in each others eyes.

    As part of the circle, we viewed the videos of us from the start of the program, and for each and every guy the change was unbelievable. It’s the obvious and the subtle things; clothes, facial hair, body language, tonality, but the most striking thing that I noticed is the look in peoples eyes. Across everyone, there’s this look of quiet, calm confidence, of an inner fire, one of comfort in who they are as people and their place in the universe, where they’re at on their journey. Some of these mega transformations aren’t even noticeable, because we see each other every day, until you look at the before videos. For me, I did not have any concept of how far I’ve come as a person. I looked like a boy, with absolutely no sense of that fucking rock of a person I am now. Many of the guys were shocked looking back, as I was. This whole program we have been standing so close to the mirror, it’s been tough to see the progress (especially when your brain is playing tricks on you), but I’m certain I’m night and day better. All of my reflections of my changes will be in my post program reflection, coming soon.

    The next day we handled some post program concerns, and finished the circle of appreciation, then headed out. As it’s now fall, the clubs have changed their configurations, so what was one of my favourite places because it had lots of outdoor area and the club had good music that wasn’t too loud, had transformed into an extremely loud indoor club with a smoking area. I knew the second I walked in I’d have to just bring the fun to the max, dance like an idiot and just let loose. We all just started to let loose, and the effect was as I thought; groups of girls were gravitating over just waiting to be talked to (if we even could have) and danced with. I chatted to a lot of people outside, entertaining big groups as more and more rockstars came out and started hitting it too. After a few minutes I’d look around at a group of 6 or so girls and each one is talking to one of the guys and having a great time, I’d smile and realise the amazing time we’re creating for everyone, then move on to keep spreading the good vibes. It’s really what this is all about; giving good emotions, fun, great energy, and living great lives with each other, as our best selves. I’m so happy to see so many of the guys progressing well and starting to really achieve. It’s funny that often they don’t think they’re progressing or where they want to be, but I see so much greatness every night, and they are realising it too. I met a gorgeous dark redhead and headed back to the hotel relatively early. Some time later, I met up with some of the guys for food, and talked about life and the next stages.

    Tonight I made progress in being vulnerable and sharing, in that I had my ex girlfriend on my mind and could use some help staying out of my head, and use a hug. It felt great to share with the guys where I was really at, instead of always projecting this perfect image I tend to do. I think she was on my mind because the program ending is another major milestone and end/begin of major life phases. She was there with me during a lot of my major phase changes, so I can understand why she’s back in my mind now. It was so good to have real friends to lean on.

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    PR Journal 24 Thursday Sept 28

    I just got off the phone with my Dad. Step Dad technically but I have never called him that. I’ve never met my real Dad. My Step Dad and Mom got married when I was 6, so for the 19 years since he has been Dad. For reference, any time I refer to “Dad”, I am referring to my Step Dad.

    A perfect parent-child relationship does not exist, and my relationship with my father was no different. Inside, I wanted more than anything for him to be my real Dad and to love me. But, as son and father will do, we would butt heads from time to time, and every time it would happen I’d question our relationship: whether I was good enough to be his son, if I was letting him down, whether or not he actually loved me. As time went on, what began as seeds grew into trees. Every time we’d fight it’d be both a reminder and evidence of those negative thoughts that existed within me. I proved in my own mind that my Dad didn’t love me, I wasn’t good enough to be his son, and I had to somehow win over his approval. And I know now, it has affected every relationship that I have ever had. I want people to like me, to the point that I “try” and get them to like me. When I do that I stop being the real me, I stop being authentic with the people that I meet. Instead of liking me, it actually turns people off because they can feel that I am hiding something from them.

    On the second or third week of Rockstar, we were tasked with reaching out to our parents and completing the relationship with them. Being open and honest about anything in our relationship that had been left unsaid. So, 5 days before the program is ending, I manned up and called my Dad. I could feel the fear envelope me as I pushed the call sign. We briefly caught up before I explained why I was calling. I told him my story, all the events that had happened since he became my Dad, and how I had interpreted them, and changed both my behavior and feelings in response to it. The hardest part, was when I got to my little brother, the fact that I was jealous of the relationship they seemed to have from the outside, so effortless. That was what I wanted, to just be loved and to know that we had a real father son connection. Then I apologized. Because I know that he has never done anything with the intention of hurting me. I told him I loved him and that I knew it would take time but I wanted to develop a real relationship with him.

    And all I got back was love. And for the first time, I feel like I have been able to really connect with him. That we understand each other. I know that the work has only just been started. You don’t transform a 19 year relationship with just a phone call. But it’s a start.

    While on this program I have been with some of the hottest girls in my life, models, bottle girls, sorority girls. And all of that seems so infinitesimal because for the first time in my 25 years I know inside that my Dad loves me. At the end of the day, we all just want to be loved by the people we care about. This will be a moment I will never forget. I can’t help but feel grateful to be in an environment that has allowed me to grow as much as I have, to the point that I can challenge myself to be open and authentic with the people that are important to me.

  50. #250
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    PR Journal 25 Saturday Sept 30

    7 years ago I got into game because my girlfriend broke up with me, and from that day onward I have always questioned how I should be acting in my day to day life when I am with people. It’s all about how can I get better, am I doing this right, how is this going to affect that. It was so fucked up because I went from being a normal guy to someone that was just stuck in his head everywhere he went, trying to get better at talking with people using lines and routines that didn’t make any sense when actually moving through a normal conversation. And something just clicked over and changed.

    For about the last 30 hours I have been living outside of my head. I’m not saying that it has been perfect. In fact in many ways I have been quite somber over the last couple of days. And yet, for the first time I have not had an incessant prattle overwhelming me, asking me second by second the best way to act. The feedback I received for my final debrief was that I tried way to hard to try and get people to like me, and I’d come off as inauthentic when I’d do that. I feel as though I’m at the opposite end of the spectrum, and I don’t give a fuck what other people think of me. It doesn’t feel like a permanent solution, but I know it’s a step in the right direction.

    It’s almost crazy fucking boring because there is just nothing going on up in my head. The difference feels like I’m holding up two painting one black and the other white. Before and during this program, I can count on my fingers the amount of times my mind actually shut off. And now I just feel a bit numb. I know it’s all part of the process but I do in some ways want to get back to the happy me who loves to talk and joke around. Even writing this now is bringing a smile to my face. Maybe that’s it. I can be happy and joyful while still going out of my way to talk with people, because I do enjoy talking with people and giving them love. It’s a happy balance because I have been finding it hard to actively listen to somebody and then be able to have a real back and forth conversation. This has started to go all over the place but the main thought I wanted to echo in this blog is, I feel free. At peace. Armed with the knowledge that I can in fact master my mind and get to the place that I want to be.

  51. #251
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    Sweden #7

    Tuesday September 26

    It’s my birthday. Today I'm 27 years old.

    I don’t know if I’ve ever started a new year of my life on the verge of a fresher start. In one week, I’ll be sitting on a plane, 27 years old, 9 weeks of Rockstar behind me and the world in front of me.

    There have been so many memories that I’ve made during this program, but certain days/events stand out more than others. This is one of them.

    Last night I went to bed around 11pm and slept for about 12 hours. It was weird I almost felt normal after that.

    There’s one final sprint left to the finish line, and then it’s over. Today was another milestone, our final gam debrief.

    The instructors started by asking us where we viewed ourselves and then gave us their opinion on how far we’ve come, and give us their next steps.

    After the circle of truth I know I can and should talk to the HOTTEST girls.

    So I felt in order to do that I want to keep pushing myself into interactions that make me uncomfortable (the girl is too hot, she’s at a table with a big group or she’s with a group of guys). The more I’m putting myself in those situations, the more comfortable I’ll become with them. That’s growth.

    The instructors didn’t disagree.

    They added to it. Suggesting that I build a fun environment by being apart of the night club. The idea being that this will help me build a social circle of guys and girls who are fun which will make it easier for me than just relying on cold approach game. Before Rockstar I would have seen this as a big challenge, but now it’s very obtainable.

    Aside from that, the consensus was I put some time into developing other aspects of my life.

    It was libertating to hear them say “You’ve checked the box of Game.” And “game will give you diminishing returns at this point.” I felt free. I want to move onto other areas of my life and shift my focus to another area while still improving game.

    I was relieved to hear that my diagnosis was the same as the instructors. When this is over in a week I can start developing the other areas of my life with full force.

    The game breakdowns were pretty lengthy, but it was inspiring to see where everyone stood back on day 1, and where they are now.

    After we wrapped up everyone, we headed out to the best restaurant in Sweden for my birthday dinner.

    One of the mentors, sneakily paid without telling any of us.

    Things like that are so cool and inspiring to me. Seeing someone who’s so successful just give back to the group like it was nothing is so cool, and a trait I look up to him for.

    Wednesday September 27, 2017.

    There’s three nights out left in Sweden. Three nights left as a 2017 Rockstar.

    I never thought this night would come. But here I am. Ready to make the most of this final weekend.

    Saturday night I was introduced to a girl through a mutual friend. I talked to her long enough to say:

    “Hi, my name is Justis.” Then carried on with my night.

    I gave her a good smile, but I guess it made a big impression on her. Because a couple days later I matched with her on Tinder. We started talking, and she typed this long message about how the interaction we had. We talked for a while, and the conversation transitioned as it naturally does.

    The theme of her “hunting” started came up a couple times, and she posted a snapchat story of her holding a toy gun with the caption “Going hunting tonight”

    I replied “Were’ going to BAR, tonight. Come catch me.”

    Her friend showed up first. Before I could ask where she was, the friend handed me an envelope with “CATCH ME” written on it. I opened it, and inside were her panties.

    It took me a few minutes to find her at the bar. But when I did, it was on.

    She didn’t speak much English. But we filled in the blanks with eye contact and body language. One thing that stood out pretty early on was how feminine she was.

    I would have never noticed something like this pre-Rockstar. But I’m more in tune to picking up on it now. A sign of how I’ve grown.

    We hung out at the bar a bit longer, dancing, drinking, and then we left.

    We made a detour to pick something up from her friend’s car before we went to th hotel. She refused to tell me what it was until we got back.

    It was a blindfold and body lotion.

  52. #252
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    Entry #27

    Sep 26th:
    Quick stuff first: I hooked-up with a girl within 30 seconds of meting her...that part and the next 10 minutes were great. The 20 seconds where she somehow decided that she was done dry humping me in the middle of the bar and should just fucking disappear like she was being hunted by the Russian Spetznaz were a bit of a downer

    I cant believe that other rock stars even alumni were asking me what I'm doing to pull girls in Stockholm?! Wtf... I feel like I've struggled with game the most and even though things are starting to come together here, it's weird to dispense solicited advice on meeting women, especially since I'm not even sure as to what it is that I'm doing. One thing I am feeling is my masculinity and my ability to lead . I feel like the women here are off the pedestal and me and my masculinity are the shit.

    Aside from that I finally felt abundance: own game was sluggish... but I was only really concerned with my guys meeting girls for most of the night. I just found it funny that I did not bring a girl home.


    A day at the lake house with the boys was an awesome experience. Being out in the swedish countryside was a nice break from metropolitan stockholm. Eating junkfood and drinking beer togther was a nice break from more intense and goal oriented activities. And the pictures came out awesome.

    About the beer: Definitiley lubes up my game. Gives me a bit of anxiety not to fall back into my older ways. But I'll accept the fact, as it was given to me: yes liqour boosts your game, but even yesterday: I really felt that I needed that one or two drinks to lube up, but I needed the crew a hell of a lot more. And my alcohol consumption is inversely proportionate to how much fun I'm having talking to girls. So no big worries there.


    Another realization: Yeah, feeling better and more improved, but gotta admit it. Pulling a girl out of a club and getting laid helps your state a lot!

  53. #253
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    Entry #28

    Sep 28:

    Soap: Last night at soap? Maybe. The apprehension and the insane wall that I have to climb to get loose are always there. But so is the new and improving aproach habit. And overcoming this stuff is getting easier and easier...but only when the guys are around. Starterd talking to girls right after I got the first drink at the bar. Pinged and opened as many as possible. Finally hooked (to the best of local standards) Amanda, who could not have been more than half my age. She was the embodiment of swedish game. Cant go to flirty and cant go too deep. Called me insecure because I told her that I was a pilot and a doctor. Though it was my attempt to find a picture of me flying that probably tipped her over the edge.
    But she was still around and when I took her hand to lead her out for a smoke, she took mine. Again confirming the adage that if they are around they are down. But in the same swedish fashion she vanished in the few seconds that it took me to finish a beer which I wasn't allowed to take outside. Good lesson on persistence: Need to be even more dominant and not let her out of my sight.

    Later on: Winged a fellow rockstar on a couple of girls as the club was winding down. One of them spoke russian and we were on to banter in the mother tongue. After about 10 minutes, she asked for my phone number despite being married with two kids. We walked back to the hotel as things were getting hot between my wing and her friend. I split her off and brought her to my room for separation. There, for about 80 seconds she was telling me about how she was unhappy with her married life and how much she liked me. Within this time window I felt the opportunity to take her to bed but decided against being a “house wrecker”. By the end of the window she realized what could have happened and decide to leave.

  54. #254
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    Entry #29

    Sep 30:

    Pre-last night: Girl # 1 wasn't as dominant as I should have been. Girl #2... should have pulled when it was disintegrating AND then opened a new girl if it didn't pan out. I mean.... that was not a bad move, jumping to a model girl. Did everything right with the model girl. She was really into me, but was limited by the logistics of her life and an early photo-shoot in the morning. Should have told her that I'm not typically into models cause she was quite skinny for me.

    Strong work me, for opening a bunch of girls on the line to the spybar. Not much materialized but, the approach habit is forming. In fact, approached in maxburger and out side the hotel at 4:30am... Big pat on the back. I need to inject my soap bar intent deeper into my interactions.

    Circle of appreciation:
    Very hard to write about such an overwhelming experience. As I sit there wondering about how much progress I have made.. doubting myself and the future, gauging what I have accomplished, I get delivered a new version of me as seen through everyone else's eyes. These are people I now trust and believe more than most of the people outside of my family. But they actually understand me beyond my family, so this shit is important. Yes they understand that my ability to attract women is paramount to me and it feeds my masculinity. It is what I enjoy and what I want to develop. If I do take off and go travel however, there are way too many other things that will be excluded from the whirlwind of advancing game. Is this something that I want/willing to risk other parts of me for? Maybe, if game needs that much more work and if that is what's going to give me fulfillment that everything else hasn't it may be something that I must pursue. But there so many other things that make me who I am...I have three month to see how I can make it all work. If not.... I need to squire that reference experience and dedicate the time or be left wondering... Back to the circle however. My growth is an example of what PR is supposed to give to people. I was fucked... to repeat and I have made what has been described as the 2nd most meaning transformation in the program. I transformed from a 39 y/o boy to a man. I actually see that transformation.. I see the boy and I sense the man that everyone sees. I've been doing well here in Stockholm and while I still have doubts as to whether its me or the place itself, the other guys see ME doing this. All of them do. Cant argue with this forum. An unbelievable boost to confidence. Especially , since they confirmed non/game related aspects of me that I have always known. A moderate opinion on every disagreement in the group, bridging together the fringes. They all see how I move, speak and behave with an instilled sense of inner calm and cool composure. It is the same demeanor I have at work, but I have now brought it to everyday life. I have a clue as to what they are talking about. I;m seen as a caring person who is working hard in the interests of the group.

  55. #255
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    PR Reflection Rockstar

    9 weeks. That is the actual amount of time that Rockstar has taken. 9 weeks. And now it is over. It’s a bittersweet feeling. On one hand, it is devastating to no longer be within a 5 minute walk of the guys I have come to love most in this world. On the other, I know that I have stepped into the man that I am meant to be. Looking back at it all, it doesn’t even seem real. I am trying to remember going out in Vegas, being out with the boys; all of it just blurs together. It feels like just yesterday I was getting on an airplane in Long Beach to begin this journey. Now I’m on a couch in Stockholm reflecting on exactly what just took place. As funny as it sounds, this journey has so little do with game.

    Having worked on it for 7 years, I didn’t come on this program because I felt I needed to get better with girls. Ok, it was something that I want to improve. But the real reason I came on Rockstar was to become the man that I’ve always wanted to be. When I started this program, I didn’t love myself. I always felt like I wasn’t enough, that in order to get what I wanted in life, hell, in order for people to like me, I needed to become someone else, to be the man that I currently was not. Working on game wasn’t about getting better with girls. Working on game was about becoming someone that other people could love. I rationalized that if people didn’t like me then I wasn’t worthy of being loved. Working on game meant working on my social skills, and thus becoming someone people would like more. The part that gets me even now is that how I felt about myself was never actually based on how other people saw me. I based how I felt about myself on my own perception of how other people saw me. What it ultimately came down to was how I felt about myself. If I didn’t like who I was, if I didn’t think I was enough, then I assumed other people couldn’t like who I was. Becoming the person I thought I should be was a necessity for me in order to be loved.

    After 9 weeks, I have come to the realization that I am enough. I am the man that I want to be. There are aspects to my life that I want to improve: my ability to communicate, my financial situation, my health, my fitness. What I have come to realize is that those things don’t define who I am. I am not my job. I am not my body. I am not my ability to dress. I am not my music taste. I am not my intelligence. I am not my ability to get girls. Who I am as a man is defined by my strengths, my integrity, my moral character, my courage, my humor, my love for people, my carefree attitude, my drive, my dedication to my family. And it is also my shortcomings, my fear, my selfishness, my laziness, being over-critical, undisciplined, manipulative, materialistic. It is my accomplishments and my failures, my darkness and my light. Although I am still growing more comfortable with this fact, both of these sides make me who I am. Both of these sides make me someone worthy of love. I grew up thinking that perfection was not only the standard to strive towards, but the benchmark that I should judge myself from. Going through this program, again and again you come face to face with your own imperfections, and you watch as the guys that sit on your left and right come face to face with their own. If all of these guys, who I personally love and respect, have their own flaws then having them myself doesn’t make me unworthy of love. They make me human. And there isn’t a single person alive who doesn’t deserve love.

    You work your ass off for 9 weeks, and then you get to the end only to realize you are everything that you will ever need. It sounds way too simple, yet that’s really the secret. I used to focus so much of my energy on the things I didn’t have, who I wasn’t, who I wished I could be, that I was blind to everything that I was. It took uprooting my entire life and scraping away much of the shit that I accumulated during my 25 years of existence to finally see the truth. The best part is that this journey is far from over. It might sound like now that I have seen the light I am done working, but I know that’s not true. Even 4 days removed from the program, I already face the same demons that haunted me before I embarked on Rockstar. 9 weeks is a long time, but so is 25 years. Although the mountain that looms ahead seems great, I move forward knowing who I am with the tools necessary to continue my transformation outside of the confines of this program. And I do not walk alone. I have been graced to become friends with some of the most spectacular men that I will ever meet. Every single one of my brothers would give me the shirt off their back if I asked, and I would gladly give mine to them. With their support, I am confident that I have the strength I need to continue on this path.

    This summer has been the most transformational experience of my life. To capture it in 1000 words is incredibly difficult. If there is one thing I can impart to you, it’s a feeling. A feeling that for the first time in my life, I am ok. For the first time in my life, I am right where I am supposed to be. For the first time in my life, I am lucky to be Andrzej. This is not the end, it’s only the beginning. Thank you for being a part of my journey. I hope these words that I write I can inspire you to be the man or woman that you want to be(and most likely, probably already are).

  56. #256
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    Sweden #8

    Thursday September 28, 2017.



    The last of our circles.The circle of appreciation.

    The same format as the circle of truth. Everyone , students, instructors, alumni sit in a circle and one by one tell each other how we feel about them.

    The intention is the opposite of the circle of truth. Instead of telling each other the ways we should improve. We are telling what we admire or appreciate in them.

    There’s a much lighter energy today than during the circle of truth two weeks earlier.

    Before starting we watched a video interview of ourselves from the first week in Vegas.

    Holy shit….

    It’s hard to believe that video was 9 weeks ago. It feels like it was yesterday. But it also feels like it was 5 years ago. It’s hard to explain. I’ve never had a period of my life that was SO intense and went by so quickly at the same time.

    I looked the same, and I sounded similar but something was different. I couldn’t put my finger on it. It’s something internal. An inner game switch that flipped sometime in the past 2.5 months and has changed the person that I am today and the person I am going to be tomorrow.

    The change was more visible externally in some of the other guys' videos. The way they look, the way they talk or the way they dressed. Those things are easier to pin point. In anycase the change in them is a good barometer for the change that’s occurred in me. If they’ve changed that much, I must have changed a lot too. It’s just harder for me to see it in myself than it is to see it in them.

    After the video I passed around my cell phone, and each guy told me what they think of me.

    My circle of truth was about 15 minutes long. My circle of appreciation was more than double that. It was heart warming to go around the room and hear what the guys thought about me, and how I have impacted them in the past 9 weeks. I will cherish this recording forever, and listen as often as I can.

    Even better than hearing how much your closest friends appreciate you, was sharing with them how I felt about them and how they have helped me.

    It was such a positive experience all around. Nowhere in society do we share this freely and this openly about our peers. An experience like this is only possible on Rockstar.

    One thing that stood out for me was how my clean eating habits have inspired others to do the same over the course of the program. Something I didn’t think about too much, but it was mentioned over and over.

    Naturally after the circle ended and we went for fast food I got a milkshake and chicken wings. The most unhealthy meal I’ve eaten in six months.


    Friday September 29, 2017.

    The start of the final weekend. This is it.

    This weekend is a peak in terms of my game. I don’t forsee myself ever undergoing a nine week immersion program that’s as dating focused as this one. This is the pinnacle of my training in this arena. For now anyways.

    I will continue to improve, sure, but this environment has done amazing things and because of that this weekend will be special.

    We’ll be split into two groups for Friday, then reunited as a group for the first time in Sweden on Saturday. Our final party.

    I went with a small group to a bar that we haven’t been to yet.

    It was busy when we showed up. But one thing I noticed in Sweden is that the people that are at the bar at 11PM have already been to two or three venues in the night, and will be gone by 12:30 or 1 so they can hit two more before going home. Whereas our group are at 1, maybe 2 spots maximum in a night.

    I walked down from our table and passed a short blonde who was dancing and smoking a cigarette.

    “There’s no dancing here.” I said. “They’ll kick you out if they catch you.”

    “Maybe I like to break the rules.” She said shrugging.

    For some reason I walked away. I could tell she didn’t want me to, but it was early still. Luckily I saw her upstairs dancing in the table next to ours a little while later.

    “You’re still breaking the rules?”

    This time I knew better than to walk away. We talked for a while oscilating between flirty, normal and some sexual conversation. I asked her what she does, before she could answer I stopped her.

    “Let me guess,” I said. “You’re one of those girls that has a million followers on instagram and gets paid to take pictures with detox tea.”

    She nodded, and showed me her instagram. She didn’t have a million followers, but she had enough that she gets paid for product placements. Oh the irony.

    We kept talking. After a couple minutes she asked to be introduced to my friends. We walked over to the Rockstar table, but before she could introduce me she tapped some dude on the shoulder and he turned around.

    “This is my friend John.” She said.

    John was about 6’2, lean, well dressed, well groomed and with a head of hair that might even be better than mine.

    I shook his hand.

    “Cool,” I said. “how do you guys know each other.”

    “We’re fucking.” John said.

    Is this the coolest man alive?

    Maybe.

    “I’m not going home with you tonight,” she said twisting the knife a little more. “I’m going home with John.”

    She smiled, and I tried my best to act indifferent.

    “See you at the after hours club?” she said.

    “No.” I said smiling and shaking my head.

    After that her and john left.

    I felt winded.

    I spent the rest of the night trying to figure out what happened, while not letting it bother me. I talked to a few other girls but I couldn’t get that one off my mind. Oh well, it was a good learning lesson.

    Plus I still have her instagram…

  57. #257
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    Sweden #9

    Saturday, September 30, 2017.

    This is it! Final party.

    No seminar today. Just hanging out and partying. Sounds about right.

    I went to the gym, ran some errands, took a nap. It felt like a normal party routine. I started getting ready for the night nice and early so I could meet up with the guys for a pre party.

    It was our biggest pre game yet, and the mood was light and easy going. It genuinely felt like no one in the room had an agenda. We we're just here to have fun.

    We got to the club before anyone else, but it didn’t matter. No one was looking around anxiously for girls to talk to. Instead we took a shit load of pictures, drank, and just enjoyed each other’s company. This built a killer party vibe. So when girls started showing up, we didn’t show them much attention. Not because because I was scared, but because our party was better than going out there trying to talk to one girl I’ll never see again. And guess what? They flocked to our table.

    It was a far cry from the first night in Vegas. That night I didn’t want to be around the table. So I spent most of that night alone, approaching or feeling guilty about not approaching.

    Tonight I was perfectly comfortable at the table, drinking champagne and hanging out with the guys, dancing and acting a fool together for one last time. It was one of those nights that you never want to end. And it didn’t end for a long time.

    Around 3 we moved to a second bar.

    I ran into a girl I met a couple weekends ago. We danced, drank and had fun together. Something happened and she left. No sweat off my back. The rest of the night was flashes of hanging out and dancing with the guys. Sometime around 5 They kicked us out because the club was closed.


    **The rest of the night is a combination of my memories and what I’ve been told by other Rockstars and girls I talked to. **


    When I came to I was in my room, naked, with an unnamed girl on top of me. It was still dark outside and I was trying my best to keep my eyes open as we moved around on the beds.

    Flash forward; it’s light outside, I’m still naked, the girls still naked, but now my roommate has joined us.

    I manage to stay conscious from here forward but my preformance is well below standard.

    It finishes around 7:30, and when it’s all said and done I asked her how we met, or what I said to her.

    “You didn’t really say much.” She said. “You just pointed at me. And then told me to come to your hotel room.”

    I asked my roommate how he got involved in this."

    “I came in earlier, and you said to come back in a bit. So I came back in a bit.”

    The three of us watched the sun coming up, and I was still drunk as hell when we said goodbye to her around 8 a.m. I got breakfast with my roomate and then passed the fuck out.

    It was the perfect night to wrap up the perfect summer.

    October 1, 2017.

    It’s over. It still doesn’t feel real. It feels like the last couple weeks didn’t happen. I even woke up and asked my roommate what club we’re going to tonight.

    “We’re not going out tonight…” he said half asleep still.

    Oh yeah.

    For a second I forgot... It’s over.

    I got up around 2 pm and headed over to the last seminar. The last seminar we’re ever going to have as Rockstars.

    The instructors gave us their thoughts on the program, and how it’s impacted them in profound ways as well.

    The whole time it’s been hard to see them as equals and not to put them on a pedestal. But hearing how we have helped them grow aswell? That made me realize it’s been a two way street this whole time.

    After the speaches, Rockstar officially ended and we all became alumni.

    We went out for one last dinner together as a group. It wasn’t as somber as you might think. But the vibe was different.

    The instagram girl from Friday, messaged me on Saturday. And I had been talking to her, but it wasn’t really going anywhere. At dinner I asked the instructor next to me to help me text her. He grabbed my phone and went to town. Within a couple messages he had her agreeing to meet up with me later tonight.

    it wasn't what he said or didn't say. It was the way he said it. Every message had a subtext to it. Texting is an aspect of my game that has slipped in the last 9 weeks. Mostly because I barely texted anyone. Something I can work on later.

    After dinner I went home and changed clothes. But her demeanor quickly changed and she said she couldn't meet up...

    I was already confused and overthinking my interaction with this girl. Now I have to wonder if she’s genuinely busy, or if she’s flaking and doesn’t want to meet up at all. The saving grace is that I'm leaving Sweden in 40 hours so I can lay it all out there.

    Instead of meeting her, I went to meet up with the guys at the bar around the corner from the hotel. Not sure what to do. He took my phone again and typed out a message calling her out in the right way.

    She said she wanted to meet up but not until tomorrow.

    That freed me to hang with the guys until 3 am. Which is still early for us, especially after going to bed at 8 am the night before.

    I didn’t have to say goodbye to anyone yet. My flights not for another day. But for all intents and purposes, this is it. It’s over.

    The most transformative, life changing experience I’ve ever been a part of, is over.

    Thank you Rockstar for everything you’ve given me.

  58. #258
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    Sweden #10

    BONUS: October 2, 2017.

    Goodbyes are terrible.

    The first one I had to do was to my roommate.

    It’s sad. But the realization is that this is just the end of the chapter. The story is not over. I will see all these guys again. I don’t know when, but I will.

    The second wave of goodbyes came over breakfast. But there’s still a group of us that are in town until tomorrow. We spent the day together shopping, eating, approaching women on the street.

    The usual.

    I was texting the instagram girl throughout the day. Not really sure if it was going to happen. She seemed flaky. I asked another instructor about it, and an alumni and they both told me it was all in my head. The interaction was solid. It. Is. On. they said. I still wasn’t sold.

    Just like they told me to do in the circle of truth, I had come outside of my comfort zone. This girl was the hottest I’ve talked to all summer, she's a minor celebrity, she flaked on me last night, and she ditched me to hang out with another guy she was fucking the first night we met.

    So yes, I was in my head about this one. But despite all of that, a part of me knew that if she met up with me it would be fine. I just had to get her to meet up. She was still on the fence.

    After much texting, some video chat, and me leading, she agreed to meet at the hotel at 8. I said goodbye to the guys I wouldn’t see in the morning and went downstairs.

    We went into the lounge and had a soda water. And just like I thought, once I got in front of her, it was on. I coordinated with my new roommate that I needed the room. And we went upstairs. We got naked, and had the best sex of my summer.

    An hour or so later she left.

    I smashed through the remaining limiting beliefs that I had about myself and my ability to meet the women I want to meet. Rockstar might have ended yesterday, but the growth was still happening. This is the perfect way to cap off the summer of a lifetime.

    I finally feel ready to step out of this container and go back into the world with all that I know. I am free from the prison inside of my mind.

    I might fuck up. I might fail but I will get back up and keep pushing forward. Because that’s what Rockstar taught me to do. Act in spite of my fear. Act in spite of failure. And keep moving forward towards the goals that are set.

    Thank you Rockstar!



    P.S. If you have any questions about anything that’s been mentioned in my journals over the summer, or if you want to apply for Rockstar yourself send me a message me and we can chat

  59. #259
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    Rockstar Reflection October 2, 2017
    What an epic journey. I no longer see some of the things I have witnessed and participated in as a fantasy or just for freaks. It’s funny now to listen to conversations we have and consider normal. If anyone outside our circle heard these stories they would think we belonged to a sex cult. I used to view some of these things we made happen over the course of Rockstar as something normal people and classy girls don’t participate in. My views were skewed and definitely have changed. We have grown into a family and can call each other brothers. As you get older it is harder to make friends and now I have a network of friends all over the world. I came into this program a farm boy from North Carolina, kind of shy around people I didn’t know very well. I definitely wasn’t vulnerable and had been with quite a few girls but only about 10% were of the quality I wanted. I have been with some of the hottest girls in just two months than in my entire life. It’s funny, when I was younger and my friends and I would go to the beach I would make a big deal if I kissed a good looking girl much less went any farther. I now have the power and the tools to make things happen. I have watched so many of these guys change, some of the changes are incredible. I was discussing with an instructor that I don’t feel I have grown that much. He explained in a debrief session that the outgoing person has always been inside of me and now I have the power to let the true me shine through. This makes sense. I have always been decent with girls and with making friends but this program has tweaked me and has provided me the tools to open up and make deeper connections. I just recently listened to my feedback from the circle of truth and circle of appreciation again. Made me realize how blessed I am, my feedback was really inspiring to me. People actually want me in their lives and I have the ability to build people up. That is an amazing gift that I have really not taken advantage of. I knew I had a good sense of humor and can make people laugh, but really wasn’t aware of the incredible gift of making people’s lives better. I plan on putting this to use and helping anyone I can. I used to be so quick at forming rackets against people, I am now aware of that unhealthy habit. Through conditioning I am able to recognize and catch these rackets and resolve them or simply recognizing them and saying three positive things about the person to counter them. Everyone sees me as a positive person and I always considered myself as a negative person. I do always try to put a smile on my face and I don’t let anything beat me. I have had some issues with my business and employees while I have been on this program and most people wouldn’t have been able to deal with it. I didn’t think I was going to be able but I coped and didn’t let it ruin my time here. There is uncertainty that this program will continue next year but I am confident it will. I have lived in my hometown all of my life except for when in college. I have always thought about moving but really never had the balls. This program has given me the confidence I need to be able to move and thrive anywhere in the world. I want to change careers and get in to the marijuana business as a grower for a company and I am determined to do that. That will require me to move to a state where it is legal. Having a regular job like that will prevent me from traveling for a while but at the same time it will be an adventure on its own just living in a new place. I eventually want to go out on my own and be a grower and this will provide me some free time to travel. I realize sacrifices have to be made in order to reap the rewards of a life you want. I am really interested in seeing what everyone does in the future. One of my friends on the program is a doctor and he was planning on quitting his job and traveling. He then rethought it and told me he was going to stay at his job. I think he was able to realize what a gift he ha and can appreciate his job now. We do plan on traveling to Latin America this winter and taking Spanish classes, might even talk to some beautiful Latin girls while we are at it. One of my goals in life is to learn the Spanish language. I am determined to achieve this goal and eventually travel all over South America. Learning a new language just adds to your value as a man and you immediately become more attractive. I want to improve my life and education is one of many steps. This program has provided me with the tools to continually improve my life. I came into the program with unrealistic expectations of coming out being great with women and being this awesome man. I am awesome and recognize that, but I also recognize one has the ability to never stop growing and continuing to improve their quality of life. Unrealistic expectations stemmed from the Rockstar presentation at the first Super Conference I attended in 2015. One of the students, which was overweight before he started Rockstar, balding, and one of the most socially awkward students ever said his first time at XS Nightclub during Rockstar he couldn’t even approach a girl. He then went on to say after Rockstar he had been with an extremely high number of girls. I forget the count he had but I thought to myself that is insane and I will be a monster with women if I do the program being I don’t have quiet the disadvantage this guy does. It turned out that he had went to Asia and got those results. That makes sense because the nights I was out with him at the Super Conference I saw him get blown out repeatedly and never pull a girl. I won’t go as far to say this is misleading because a girl is a girl is a girl, but from the info I have gathered an average white guy can crush it with women in Asia. That same guy isn’t going to get the results in the US though. In the Vegas leg of the trip in seminar two former students said it took them a few weeks to pull a girl in Vegas when they were on Rockstar but after they completed the program they had some incredible numbers with women as well. These were awesome guys I became friends with but I didn’t see them pulling that often in Vegas. I then found out they went to Asia after the program and got most of those numbers. I don’t see anything wrong with that but it helps me understand that some women are just going to be attracted to white guys and it will be easier in those countries with the girls. I was kind of bummed finding the incredible numbers came from being in Asia and not in the US. It is a good marketing strategy though. I was disappointed that day game was not covered during this program. We took it upon ourselves to practice day game. That’s one thing I would change about the program. I was hoping we would do at least two or three days working on day game but that is left up to us. If you are reading this and trying to decide if rockstar is for you I would recommend you deciding what you want in life. If you want a quick fix it is not for you, there are no quick fixes for this. If you are willing to fight, struggle, and claw your way through the program and plan on continuing to do so after the program then apply. I went out every single night for two months straight except when we were told to stay in, which was maybe two nights. The earliest I came in was probably 4am, most of the time it was daylight. You have to be physically and mentally prepared to put in that kind of work. The fitness program and daily routines leading up to Rockstar is not for the faint at heart. If you consider yourself in the top 10% of men then you might be able to handle it.

  60. #260
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    Final Reflection

    Pffff… I can’t believe it’s been a full week since I left Stockholm… let’s try to do a speed re-run through those mind-blowing 22+ weeks… so many events, so many experiences, so many emotions, such a wild ride…

    It all started off waiting… being on the waiting list, not knowing whether I’d get a spot… I had actually written it off in my mind already when the confirmation call came… and from there it was a non-stop rush all the way through spring, summer and fall… reading all those confusing infos on diet and gymming, not knowing what the heck to make of it… talking to a small army of doctors, mental coaches, fitness coaches, physiotherapists, weightlifters, chiropractors, gym rats, dieticians and whatnots to figure it all out, going nuts over the prospect of having to figure it all out on the fly… adapting my fitness program about 3 times a week and my diet almost as often… fucking up my hamstrings and forearms, having to cope with all the self-doubt, old stories and limiting beliefs arising from my physical ailments… re-reading my blog from those weeks now makes me kinda smile. Smile at the guy who at the same time was so trapped in his old self-beliefs, yet under the surface so ready for seeing things in a new way… funny enough how in hindsight it all makes sense and the path
    I’ve travelled seems to clear, when in the midst of things, I felt lost in the fogs pretty much the entire way… that’s part of the adventure, I guess. Funny also how much I thought I would look like a complete pussy after the workout program, and then once in Vegas, received so many compliments from the guys… Funny also how I’m so clearly able to read between the lines of my old blog entries and saw the new light in my mind that – according to all the feedback I got from the boys – I wasn’t really able to portray to the outside world yet until very recently. It all seems to have happened in waves – the fitness program, game, inner development… first excitement, than inner struggle and frustration, then reframing and breakthroughs, and back to the starting line again – this time at a higher level of increased difficulty. Funny how my thoughts of the last week of the fitness program echo the feelings that I am experiencing post-PRS, just from deeper down in the trenches…

    So then, as to the actual 9-week program: The 10-day in Vegas was definitely a period of being overwhelmed and confused. So much stuff to do, so much theory to take it, so many new environments to get used to, so many old beliefs to be shattered, so many girls to approach, so many new ways of interacting to practice… I remember feeling constantly out of breath and playing catch-up… and the sheer disbelief of what was possible… one night you think you can’t approach girls for the life of you, the next one you’re motorboating a bunch of chicks, the next night you’re listening to crazy stories from the boys and again the next night you’re singing happy birthday naked with a bunch of your friends to the girl you just had group sex with… hard to remember all those distinct feelings as it all turned into a blur eventually, but it was at the same time a period of increased learning and intense confusion. We were taught so many new concepts, yet it all remained at such an abstract level so far away from RSD Julien-style videos… hard to explain now and hard to figure out then. I guess learning was meant to be very organic.

    And at the same time, there was so much to learn about the boys, so much friction and misunderstanding at the start, as we all came from such different backgrounds, everyone was constantly tired and permanently operated out of their comfort zone, and most of us were battling some inner demons that led us to apply for Rockstar in the first place… a good thing we spent so much time on Inner Game in seminars and were taught to tell events from stories and watch out for our own mental distortions… re-reading my journals now overarching feelings of those of those weeks were inability to comprehend what I was doing or what was happening to me, completely sensory and emotional overload and a seemingly permanent contradictions between what I thought I was feeling and my actions, and a permanent feeling of time running way too fast and way too slow at the same time… plus, it’s astonishing how often I felt the bond between the boys growing at this early stage of the program already when there was still so much more bonding to come…

    After the mechanics, it was basically all about inner game. Instructors, psychologist and coaches, shamans and all of us boys came together to create an awesome container to feel safe and open up in, to share emotions, reach deep and lend a hand to our demons to free them and turn them into beautiful birds… there are always more communication tricks to learn, but once you’ve gotten the basics, it’s all about your attitude and vibe. Part of that is state, but the more fundamental part is your self-image and your mental formations. And that’s what the focus was on. Hard to explain without giving away too much, but that’s what you should do Rockstar for. Fuck getting laid, it’s about becoming happy without needing any girls or anyone else at all! Amazing how literally as little as 2 weeks into the program, we had almost all the tools at hand already and most of the insights on an intellectual level… and then it took so much for time for it all to sink in and click… there’s a reason why this thing lasts 9 ½ weeks… and no, it’s not Kim Basinger.

    So interesting to read my blogs again and see what experienced I had blocked out in the meantime… At the start of the road trip we apparently all had a hard time adapting to Mykonos and thought girls were tough to interact with… and looking back at it now we’re all talking about what a paradise of good-looking, approachable girls was compared to the two latter stints… Mykonos definitely was hard for me at first, as the group – instead of slowing down – upped the speed a gear or two and went into brutally relentless mode. Until I had caught up on sleep and adapted to the new environment, I just could not keep pace, but once I did, I really had a fun time there trying out new behaviors and mindsets such as making girls jealous on purpose and daring to be very bold and sexual in public… Then there was my big hole my tiredness had gotten me into that it took me days and quite some help from fellow rockstars and instructors to get out of, but that in hindsight made me grow a lot. Growth happens in waves and in my case is often associated with growing pains… then there was the wild yacht day with a crazy Hollywood celebrity going completely bonkers on the boat…

    The Budapest leg of the road trip then was kind of a mirror image of the Mykonos one – I started off in a really good mood and then had a period of profound self-doubt. The clubs were rather boring, we never got blown out as often and as quickly as there, and when I did get something going, logistics weren’t in my favor and I wasn’t really able to see all the progress that I was still making. Same with the guys – though I got criticized a lot at the start, I loved the group vibe, but then an issue came up that kinda divided the group into 2 subgroups and it took me a few days to process my feeling of being left out… in the end I gave up on Budapest, and that’s when I managed to take a girl home on the last night out… been a consistent theme – happened on the last weekend in Mykonos as in Stockholm… should tell me that if I stop worrying and learn to love the bomb, good things happen more often than not, albeit not yet with the hottest girls I’m talking to.

    Stockholm told us a lot about expectations. There were a ton of good-looking girls around to talk to, but as it had been sold to us as the paradise of insanely good-looking sex-craving vixens, the fact that it was really hard to figure these girls out initially kinda killed the vibe for a lot of us at first, and quite a few of the Rockstars told me in private they would have preferred a shorter Sweden stint. Then again, all of this (plus the nightlife being limited to basically 3 nights a week) gave us the opportunity to take time to bond even stronger with the boys. Especially after the super-intense experiences of the circle of truth that gave everyone a laser-sharp focus on improving their shortfalls and truly networking with all those amazing individuals.

    I’m sitting here, having re-read all my blogs, shaking my head and smiling. While I was in it, I was damn certain almost all of the time that up to that very point I hadn’t learned much, that I was completely lost in confusion, that it was an incredibly long way still to go, that I was going through some really rough times… and in my blogs I so often wrote about all the amazing experiences and learnings I had had, about all the breakthrough and my new positive outlook on life, about all the steady growth and my feeling it would soon all fall into place, about waiting for that one big breakthrough… that then literally came at the very last second, 30 minutes before landing in my hometown… I just don’t do anything less than Hollywood-esque… :P

  61. #261
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    PR reflection:

    Where to begin: Last 9 weeks were like nothing I've ever experienced. There, I started. What have I gained? People. People who will be a part of my life forever. Given how intense the application process is, I had very high expectations for the kind of guys that I would meet here. However, looking back at the last 9 weeks, I'm blown away by our group. I mean...I thought that there would be at least one or two guys who would have “slipped through the cracks” of the selection process and I would not get along with. But no! I truly never have been surrounded by such a group of caring, honest, genuine and accomplished people.

    On the road-trip everything was always set and everyone took care of their individual responsibilities.
    And when the group cohesion was in any sort of danger, we would come together and be open and vulnerable and address to the very core the issues that were creating friction. I really haven't been been in this kind of environment before. I would imagine that few people have.

    The sense of brotherhood has solidified by the time we got to Sweden and these are life-long bonds. For someone who has (had?) so much difficulty forming bonds with people this part of the experience was truly transformative.

    It was amazing to see how guys whose game dominated by the end of PR, became a lot more interested in connecting with other guys, having a good time together and strengthening group bonds as opposed to focusing on game. It was almost like transcendence into the next level of personal development.

    A huge part of the post rock-star effort for me will be to sustain and strengthen those bonds.

    I gained an understanding of fulfillment. It was humbling for me to experience how extremely good looking guys who attract girls without trying, could experience very similar feelings of insecurity and inferiority as me. Same is true for guys who have achieved extraordinary success in business and command wealth that I'm unlikely to see ever. It really was a crystal clear indication that fulfillment in life really cant come from the outside i.e. possessions, women or even physical fitness but rather has to be developed from within. Furthermore, I now understand that fulfillment is more of a process than an end goal. It comes from growth and continuous improvement without achieving a particular point. I have been given a a broad set of tools on how to achieve that fulfillment and now I must work to implement them in my every day life.

    What else have I gained? Appreciation for me. I've never felt so much of it. I may still be in a bit of a shell shock from it, as the world around me seems a bit surreal. I suspected even before PR that my relationship with myself was very unhealthy and living in this new state of gratitude and self love, now that I am back is surreal. Looking back at my old self, I'm shocked that I did not appreciate everything that I achieved in life. My education, my job, my physical fitness, my family or the the amount of energy that I posses. I look back at how all these things came to shine during PR, in large part through the lens that are my PR brothers. I feel so much appreciation for myself and gratitude for things in my life.

    I have found my masculinity. The concept was so vague prior to PR. However, it has grown by leaps and bounds since I've been here. My understanding of masculinity and reflection on how I've been practicing it all along were a big achievement of PR. Instructors were real role models for me. They exude masculinity in the most authentic way when it comes to game, adversity, social situations or business.

    I gained game: Game was real hard in Vegas. It was pretty hard on the road trip, but things started to open up there. I felt like learning the technical aspects of game were “way too hands off” from our instructors. I felt so much frustration. Definitely floated the idea of throwing in he towel a few times, though not too seriously. The benefits of the struggle without suffering became became apparent even as the struggle went on. Immunity to rejection and self imposed pressure to approach were forming through this frustration. I would approach an average of 30 times a night. Keeping in mind that the difference between a shitty night and SNL was just one approach was a powerful motivator and yielded results. These went far once the Vegas leg was over. Game had to continually adapt to the places where we went. Things certainly started to click in Sweden. Seeing as to how I really started at below 0, I'm not sure what the amalgamation of those experiences have done for the mechanics of my outer game. In fact I'm sure these will need further work. However, my inner game, which really did not exist before PR feels strong. It is based on my appreciation of my masculinity and my enjoyment of being the dominant force in the male to female interaction from the start. I also finally started to understand what it means for the first 5 approaches not to matter and the importance of building state early on in the night by just having fun. This was easier to do on PR, when I had an group of 15-30 guys to hang with and will be a challenge when I get home, as my social circle is small and weak.

    The real test will come when I go back work in rural Nebraska. Here, nocturnal hours and lack of human contact may drag me back into the purgatory of self contentment. However, I am confident that I have gained what I need and can sustain the momentum of self improvement and emotional fitness even here. In fact I am looking forward to getting back to work and conditioning myself to sustain my gains from PR.

    I gained the concept of emotional fitness. Much like physical fitness it is important for overall well being and must be exercised. I have a full suite of exercises to maintain my emotional fitness.

    I expanded my sexuality. I considered myself sexually liberal but I realized that I was far from it. I wish I had participated in more unorthodox activities while on PR as it seemed to be an enjoyable activity for everyone and great bonding experience. I'll be looking forward to these opportunities in the future .

    While I have made a lot of psychological discoveries about myself, I also found an exciting physical ability. In the past I could do quiet well without sleep, but it wasn't till PR that I found myself being able to stay up 40-48 hours and remain reasonably functional. This came in quite handy on multiple occasions and in various countries. Paradoxically however I am starting to realize that sleep deprivation causes me to lose mindfulness and sink deep into my head. I think there were plenty of nights where I would walk around the club deep in various tangents in my head because I did not sleep the night before. These are helpful discoveries about myself.

    During our final debrief, I mentioned that for me life will be classified as before and after PR. I firmly believe that as I am writing this. It's been a month since I came back. I've immersed myself back into my old surroundings, but I feel like a new man thriving in my old environment. I find myself smiling for so many reasons.... because I think back to the crazyness of PR, because I feel the inner strength and masculinity that I have discovered or if think back to my shenanigans on PR. I feel much deeper interactions with people and have deeper appreciation of the human experience. I sense women look at me differently, just like I view them. I have a deeper connection with my family and I have a new group of amazing guys all over the world whom I can call brothers.

    If any of you guys reading this and want to talk more and are interested in applying, feel free to PM me. I'll be happy to share more and offer any guidance that I can.

  62. #262
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    Program Reflection

    How do I even begin to describe or reflect on such a massive, life changing summer. In so many ways, my life is different; I am different. And that’s not to say I’m a different person, but rather, I’m different because I’ve had so many layers that weren’t me washed away, and am so much closer to always living as my authentic self. I’m calm, solid, self-assured, and confident.

    My journey started with a lot of pain. I returned from operations in the Middle East nearly exactly one year prior to the end of PR. At that point, I was at what felt like the bottom; my long-term girlfriend had shut me out of her life while I was away, I was trapped in a career that wasn’t right for me, most of my friendships had faded, and the ones that were still around really didn’t treat me well or value me. I was lean physically and looked good, but my overall health wasn’t great. I was drinking regularly, and hooking up with nearly any woman that would have me. The relationships I’d form with women would be corrupt, in that I was seeking validation from their company. I was living a life based on external validation, from my job, the women in my life, and how my body looked. Take any element of that away, and I’d feel like shit until I’d replaced it; but nothing was ever good enough. At my lowest I knew I had to just put one step in front of the other to overhaul my life, and take control of my mind. I started working on myself from the end of that year, through an online Love Systems program, before getting onto a bootcamp with an amazing coach, JC. From there, I finally quit drinking completely, and started going out 3 and 4 nights a week, sober, by myself. I got good at talking myself into a positive state, and getting control of my mind, so I could get out of bed and head out to talk to strangers by myself. But there was still a lot to work on, and I wasn’t really making progress with women or with myself. There still felt like there was this giant hole in me, and I was almost like a drone with no heart. In the meantime, I was applying for PR as my saving grace; I could only keep the lonely grind for so long.

    The application process itself was a period of growth; between writing my application, each of the interviews, and the final acceptance interview, I’d grown and changed. I applied knowing that getting better with women was the smallest part of the program, and I knew deep down what I wanted out of the program, but at first applying I wasn’t able to articulate the real reasons, nor was I able to fully understand my drive. By the end of the process, I had dug into my own mind and motivations so much that I was clear on why I had such a burning drive to get on. It was such a build-up, and when I told I’d made it, a wave of gratitude and excitement came over me. I was ecstatic. The biggest journey of my life was about to begin. I must say, I was a bit worried about sending a chunk of money to guys I’ve never met on the other side of the world, but sometimes you just need a little faith.

    The fitness program started almost immediately. Having had already trained in the gym for around 5 years, I thought I wasn’t going to get much out of this leg of the program, apart from maybe some bonding with the team and having a bit of structure to my training. I was wrong. The program itself was intense, and took a lot of time and energy; fitness became my entire life for that period, and everything else was secondary. Within the first week I’d learned how fear was holding me back in so many areas of my life; how I wasn’t progressing in a lot of areas because I was so terrified of losing what I had already built and achieved. I learned about how easy monumental tasks become when you make the little things non negotiable. I learned a framework for coaching myself, and improving my own life that is applicable to anything in life. I shifted my focus from what those around me thought, to an internal solidarity with my path. I saw how success was based mostly on process and execution, and I changed my relationship with my body. Once it was time to get on a plane to Vegas, my mind was primed for growth.

    Arriving in Vegas was surreal. It feels like it was so long ago, like it was another life. Gathering at the mansion and then for seminar on the first day is a cool memory to think back to; everyone is literally different people. The Vegas leg kicked off with the group sharing their story (and as we’d learn, they were just that, stories we tell ourselves), and it was crazy to see how many shared so many similar elements. The instructor team was nothing short of incredible; I constantly felt so grateful to be sitting in the same room as these guys. We were also fortunate enough to have Venture around to deliver some of the most impactful seminars on masculinity and vulnerability. From there, we kicked off into some bonding with the shooting day and started the 10 day bootcamp. The energy amongst the group was insane, so many motivated guys, fit and ready to go at improving themselves at full speed. We spent about a day and a half on ‘game mechanics’, but we were never told any lines or routines. Sterling said straight up, that most programs are about changing the projection of a person (which leads to issues like identity friction and inauthenticity), whereas PR aims to address the person themselves – a much harder task. The remainder of the 10 day was essentially ‘inner game’; working on things like our inner dialogue, the stories we tell ourselves, the rackets we run against people, changing our state, masculinity, vulnerability, what it means to be a good person and a good man.

    For me, going into Vegas was easy compared to going out at home. At home, I’d be going out by myself, a lone wolf working on myself. In Vegas, I had a bunch of awesome people to do it with, not to mention the support network of instructors and alumni. However, had I not endured those months of brutal approach anxiety by myself, I wouldn’t have been able to enter Vegas with a clear mind ready to learn. Throw in an accent, and most interactions would be fairly easy to start. I wouldn’t say I started out any further along than most in terms of my skills with women, but I realised toward the end of the program how beneficial it was to be able to handle my inner fears right from the start; more approaches and interactions early on significantly sped up my learning. I was able to integrate learning faster and more consistently, because I wasn’t always trapped in my mind. None of this is to say Vegas wasn’t challenging; it certainly was. Going out, night after night, on little sleep, to face fears and be rejected over and over takes a special level of dedication and drive. When it’s 3 or 4am, it’s been a brutal night, and you’ve got a big day the following day, it’d be easy to pack it in and head home without pushing yourself to the limit, but this is where major growth is found; at the edges of the comfort zone.

    Aside from the outer game front, the start of Vegas quickly started changing my inner psychology. I had begun to think about my relationship with myself, the limiting blocks in my mind. Moving from the 10 day and continuing into the inner game intensive period, I completely blew the lid off my inner demons, issues and processes. I had begun digging new trenches in my mind. I was beginning to see at my core I didn’t have self love; in fact, I hated myself. I felt I wasn’t worthy of love, I felt worthless, and I lived from a place of scarcity. By the end, I had been rocked to my core, where all of these negative stories and beliefs had been deconstructed and washed away, replaced with love. I began to see that I am a gift, that I am worthy of love, I learned how to be genuine, to connect, to give, to trust myself, to trust the universe. I found my spirituality, something I would have never believed would happen to me. I had been given the tools, shown the way, and had the remainder of the program to integrate all of these learnings, while I dug the new trenches deeper. All in all, Vegas was amazing; living in the house with the guys, the nights out that sometimes felt like literally pressing reset each night with them all blurring into one, the incredible moments during insane parties, the highs, the lows, being constantly tired, sneaking in naps whenever possible, meeting some amazing women, building great friendships, shooting, driving between the mansion and the clubs, pumping each other up, seeing each other succeed, the BBQ, the final party, the bungalow, the great DJs, the bad DJs, but most of all, the people.

    Before we knew what had hit us, we were heading off on the road trip immersion period. At first, I didn’t get why the instructors didn’t come too, but it quickly made sense. Giving us the space to manage ourselves, allowed a lot of intergroup bonding and growth in itself. The other major part of this is to take off the training wheels, and give us a chance to feel the wobbles of life without the container and structure of the full team to save us. Much of my growth came in the first week of the road trip; if Vegas was the uprooting, then the road trip was finding new soil and laying the foundation. About mid way through the road trip, I had big realisations; that I was happy with who I am, I love myself, I’m a fucking gift. Internally, I’d made the switch to core confidence; sure in who I am. I had major growth in my skills with women, solely because I was coming from a place of rock solid calm, authenticity, and genuine giving. I was building a natural ability to connect that didn’t really require words; it felt like people could just sense my inner power. We were bonding as a group in a way that Vegas just couldn’t allow for, and we were partying in Mykonos at the sickest clubs, with the best tables and the hottest women. It was such an environment of pure love and joy, everyone living life to the absolute limit. Budapest then took the bonding to the next level, where we had more time to take it slower and think about our lives post program. I loved this city too, I think I’ll be back.

    If Vegas was the uprooting, the road trip was finding new soil, then the Sweden leg was letting those roots take hold and grow deeper. I went into Sweden still growing, and still battling with my mind to keep a hold of the new pathways. It was surprising, one minute my brain would be telling me I hadn’t changed, then the next minute I’d be feeling effortless joy, or feel a wave of calm and confidence, or be taking a gorgeous woman back to the hotel. I got good at catching my brain in negative loops, which is huge. When I thought I wasn’t going to learn much more, and the growth had slowed down, I’d have another massive wave of growth. Rockstar continued to surprise. The various circles here had a massive impact in making me make the final few major changes in my life. The pace in Sweden is completely different; the seminars are a lot more free flowing and relaxed, and we had a lot more time to just hang out with each other, the instructors, and alumni. The going out wasn’t as full on, given it’s a much more normal city and only a few nights a week are good to go out. The amount of love I have for every single person on this program is ridiculous. Sweden was such a good opportunity to get to know the instructors and each other so much more, as we integrate all of the learnings into our lives and really look to the future. We also started the business leg of the program, where the mentors in our group gave some amazing seminars on their backgrounds, and primed us for the next phase of many of our journeys; achieving the lifestyles we dream of, being unshackled from the chains of a job, and the life normal society ascribes to.

    I want to live a life of absolute freedom of choice; one where I am the master of my own destiny, I make the decisions, I walk to the beat of my own drum. This means choice in the women and friends I have in my life, choice in the work I do, the places I live, what I do day to day, and who I do it with, and when. Rockstar has been an accelerator to achieving this kind of life; I now have choice in the relationships I keep, and I have a network of amazing people I fucking love, and want to share the journey of life with. I couldn’t be better primed to nail the next phase, which is business & financial freedom. I vowed to remove the chains that imprison my mind, and Rockstar was a great preview for that; there’s no 9-5, no named days, no negativity, constant questioning of beliefs and ‘truths’, an environment of pure unadulterated growth, where you live in a hyper reality pushing the limits of what’s possible every day.

    Returning home was tough; to go from one extreme of the growth spectrum, to the opposite, and losing that positive amazing environment is a challenge. However, I’ve been more than equipped with the tools and support network to take control of my own life. I still talk to the guys every day, and we keep in touch on a weekly call. I’m so excited to see where we all go in this next phase of our journeys, and I know we will be best friends (doesn’t really do the bond justice) for life. We all share such a special bond, and no matter how much life tries to get me down, pure love is a text or call away. Reintegration is a constant battle, much like when we first arrived on the road trip, but I just know even greater growth is on the horizon.

    Since returning home, I’ve quit my job of 9 years, all I’ve ever know since I was 17, and have the confidence in myself, the trust in myself and the universe, to step out and forge my own path. I don’t have a completely clear picture of where I’m going, I have a direction and a vision, and I’m smashing my way down that path. It’s amazing to see that as soon as I’ve opened my mind to all the opportunities and abundance in the world, opportunities are abundant! My issue at this point is focussing on one. My relationships with my friends is different; I am so much more present, attentive, genuine, real. People look at me and say things like ‘you seem really happy’, or ‘you seem different’. It’s heart warming to realise how far I’ve come, and how much love there is in the world. I’m also noticing that I’m unconsciously drawing good people into my life.

    Rockstar has been the single most amazing, life changing, transformational thing I’ve ever done. I honestly don’t think there’s anything else on earth like it. I feel so very grateful to have been a part of it, having been able to contribute to it, and will hopefully will be able to contribute to its continuing success. What the instructors, Sterling and Vici, have put together, is nothing short of incredible. I will be forever grateful. There’s my life before Rockstar, and my life afterwards, and the picture of that life afterwards is looking fucking incredible. Peace and love.

  63. #263
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    Rockstar reflection

    Mark 2017 down as the year my life easily had the biggest transformation compared to the other 37 years of my life. One single program is responsible for the extraordinary changes in my life and that is Project Rockstar.

    I sit here reflecting on the past 9 weeks of the program, and the 12 weeks before that for the fitness program – I don’t recoqnise the former myself. Its hard to describe all the changes, some subtle - some major.

    I’ve never spent time dedicated to personal development before so this is the first program I’ve taken to work on “me”. I’ve done plenty of career development before but nothing aimed at making a better version of “me”. What I thought the program was about and what it ended up being is completely different. Different in a great way.

    Initially many of us just thought going out for 9 weeks straight working on our “game” would just help us date hotter girls. I definitely could use some help in this area. I’d never been super successful with women and had a few bad relationships in my past. Dating hotter girls would make me feel better inside. The fact is, dating hotter girls is one of the results of the program but its more of a side effect rather than a focus. We spent 9 weeks solid working on becoming the best and most authentic version of ourselves – no fake pickup lines or anything like that. Once you become the best version of yourself then of course, beautiful women will be attracted into your life.

    First advantage is that you all work as a team – 15 guys all working on a common goal. The learning advantage is multiplied because we all learn from each other’s successes and failures. The amount of content is massive, infact I’m still trying to absorb it after the program. In anycase the amount of content is more than an human has absorb straight away.

    Most importantly the program gave me the tools to deal with the future and any new problems and challenges I might face. Firstly the tools help you recognise when your behaviour or situation is not ideal, and then give you options to navigate through those challenges. Before Rockstar I didn’t recoqnise certain situations were not ideal, and I’d happily accept mediocrity.

    The core of the program is accepting yourself and loving yourself. Loving all the good bits and all the bad bits and constantly working on the bad bits to improve them.

    My dating life has certainly improved, I had a lot of different relationships over rockstar. Some were one night stands where we didn’t keep in contact with each other, others were more “boyfriend / girlfriend” relationships – these ones I have kept in contact with the girls. Having an abundance of options has allowed me to make decisions on what I want in my dating life. For now being single is ideal but I enjoy keeping in contact with these girls as great friends.

    Looking back, one of the best things to come out of the program is a close knit group of new friends. The other Rockstars are an amazing bunch of guys who poured their soul out to me and me in return. These guys are going to be in my life forever and I know if I’m ever in trouble, they will have my back. Its rare to gain new friends that you will know for the rest of your life, and I just gained 15 of them.

    Rockstar has many parts and I don’t know of any other program that works on many parts of your life to push you to be a well-rounded masculine individual that is driven by self love, giving and abundance.

    For those that are reading this post and thinking “Is Rockstar for me ?” . The answer is yes – life is short – take a chance, do as much homework as you can on the program. Speak to former students and do whatever you can to make it happen. Don’t delay it any further. Go into debt if you need to, borrow, who knows how long Rockstar will continue running – hopefully forever – but make sure your application is in for the very next Rockstar intake.

    I’ve experienced the harsh reality this year that life is short, nothing is forever and not to take things for granted. I’m so glad I got accepted and there is no going back to my life the way it used to be. Of course some areas may slide a little backwards when I’m not around 15 of the most awesome and motivating guys in the world, but some things you just can’t unlearn.

    Integrating back into “normal” life has a few challenges. What is “normal” ? Is my current life the new normal. How do I talk to mates about stuff like group sex – something that is so far out of their reality. The program reminds us to be mindful to not force our new outlook and reality on everyone. Some people are content with a more basic life, and that’s cool too. The main thing is to do what makes you happy and not force your life on theirs.

    I’ve still got a lot of room for growth in my life, infact it will be never ending. Thankyou Rockstar and the team that runs Rockstar. I’m permanently a better person now and can’t wait for what the rest of my life entails.

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