How to get over Approach Anxiety from jediblood

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    How to get over Approach Anxiety from jediblood

    how to get over it


    ok its very simple but it is hard for so many guys them thinking.... maybe shes got a BF or shes busy or maybe shes into that store. or or or or or. so many or's and when you over think your anxiety comes in. now if you dont think and just do it then there wont be a issue you see. as soon as you start thinking about something after 3 seconds the famous '3 second rule' it kicks in. nothing bad is going to happen THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN IS SHE IGNORES YOU AND WALKS AWAY. A SLAP IS 1% CHANCE. so just go in be direct i teach direct game no cheesey opener its 2016 not 2002..... just go in and dont think about it thinking causes AA as soon as you see open your mouth and trust me it will work. it shows confidence and being a alpha



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    So you're a dating coach? With Love Systems?

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    No I'm independent

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jediblood View Post
    so just go in be direct i teach direct game no cheesey opener its 2016 not 2002..... just go in and dont think about it thinking causes AA as soon as you see open your mouth and trust me it will work. it shows confidence and being a alpha
    Wait... People pay for your advice?

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    Yes

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    Approach anxiety is very often a symptom of a bigger problem.

    Personally, I discovered for myself -- after much self-reflection -- that approach anxiety was related to not wanting to seem useless in front of random strangers and women. It boiled back down to a self image that was embedded when I was a kid.

    And it is different for each individual.

    The people who are giving advice in this thread, you guys come off as highly unqualified when you touch on topics that should be best dealt with by professionals. You may have a ton of advice in picking up, good for you, but stay away from what you clearly don't understand. It's misleading as f***.

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    Maybe some people don't feel useless like you and they just have a social anxiety issue

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    You are compounding your own ignorance.

    Social anxiety is STILL a symptom of a deeper issue.

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    It's only a deeper issue if you make it a deeper issue everyone I worked with overcame it so

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jediblood View Post
    Maybe some people don't feel useless like you and they just have a social anxiety issue
    Not cool

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jediblood View Post
    It's only a deeper issue if you make it a deeper issue everyone I worked with overcame it so
    Where did you think the social anxiety came from? Plucked from the air you breathe in?

    Instead of telling us all that "everyone I worked with overcame it so", why don't you explain to us all in more specific details what did you do to help them "overcome it"? If you can't even defend your own argument properly, maybe you should just stop making yourself look incredibly amateurish.

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    For me approach anxiety works like this. I think if you're a guy who's always had moderate success with attractive women, sure approaching an attractive girl is still going to seem kind of scary but you know that you've had success with women in the past and if you're a guy who's always had attractive women show interest in you that's gonna of course a boost your confidence because your experience tells you that you're not a loser with women.

    If however you're a guy like me who's in his early to mid 40s who's never had any success with women other than the odd blind dates that never went anywhere, going up to a total stranger especially in a shopping mall is a very very awkward thing to do for most guys.

    And really the odds are stacked against you because most women go to shopping malls to "shop" not get approached by some stranger she's never met before... And let's be honest and realistic unless you're a guy who's really outgoing who knows how to talk to girls and be very smooth and natural about it you're going to choke the minute she looks at you like who the hell are you and why are you even talking to me??

    And yes I'm also talking about inner game issues as well. I sometimes try just going up girls and doing something harmless like asking for the time. And to be honest even then some women seem to act like I am bothering them or OK I'll tell you just so you'll get out of my face kind of thing... So the problem is if you already have low self-esteem and you're approaching women who also might feel uncomfortable that some strange guy she's never met before is trying to talk to her now you're both going to be feeling very awkward and you're hanging onto her every body language hoping to God she's at least going to be nice enough to you so that you can at least kind of try talking to her but you're going to choke the minute you see she doesn't seem to be into you what so ever
    This is also what is called being outcome dependent.
    But it's also easier said than done to say well just shrug it off and go to the next girl. And that's why guys like me fear going up to random strangers and try talking to them because we really have no idea what to even say to make it look natural like you're not trying to pick her up in a shopping mall.

    WP

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    And really the odds are stacked against you because most women go to shopping malls to "shop" not get approached by some stranger she's never met before...
    While they may not go to the mall thinking "gee I hope someone approaches me today" they are certainly open to meeting cool guys. So you're completely and wholly false there.

    And let's be honest and realistic unless you're a guy who's really outgoing who knows how to talk to girls and be very smooth and natural about it you're going to choke the minute she looks at you like who the hell are you and why are you even talking to me??
    Thats the point of practicing. What are you waiting for, to one day magically wake up and be perfect? You have to go through that initially stages of fucking it up a bunch, having it seem awkward, etc.

    If you're not willing to have that happen then giving up and forgetting about this is the best option for you.

    guys like me
    Drop that mentality. You're not a special snowflake and you shouldn't cling to a particular identity of being a guy who's got a particular struggle in this. Everyone who got good has been a "guy like you" at some point.

    So rather than "being a guy like me" you should be asking are you willing to be a "guy like them" and put in what is required to change for the better.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH 2016 - www.datingcoachvox.com

    FOLLOW ME: Twitter / Facebook

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vox View Post
    While they may not go to the mall thinking "gee I hope someone approaches me today" they are certainly open to meeting cool guys. So you're completely and wholly false there.

    That's not true for all women. Yes you can run into a girl or a few girls who are approachable and friendly enough to engage in a conversation, but the 8,'s 9,'s and 10's either usually have boy friends with them, or have this very stuck up look on there faces and I have approached women like this who right away have attitude and a some what standoffish personality way about them.

    The fact is, its a numbers game. When I say guys like me, the harsh reality is, a guy like me who's 44 years old, 5'8 at best, average looking at best walking up to two stunning 20 some year old models is more then likly going to get rejected simply because these women have options. That and the fact you see so many of these young stunners with guys who look like basket ball players there so tall. Or guys who are GQ in looks.

    Take a guy "like me" who doesn't fit the bill who has never in his life had any success and yea, giving up seemes to be my only option. It's a lot harder then your short, in your mid 40's, most attractive younger women have steady tall, above average looking boy friends. The reality is, these women may talk to you just to be polite but no intrest at all. So when the odds are that stacked against you, to save what little self esteem you have, you ask your self is it even worth it?

    Wp



    Thats the point of practicing. What are you waiting for, to one day magically wake up and be perfect? You have to go through that initially stages of fucking it up a bunch, having it seem awkward, etc.

    If you're not willing to have that happen then giving up and forgetting about this is the best option for you.



    Drop that mentality. You're not a special snowflake and you shouldn't cling to a particular identity of being a guy who's got a particular struggle in this. Everyone who got good has been a "guy like you" at some point.

    So rather than "being a guy like me" you should be asking are you willing to be a "guy like them" and put in what is required to change for the better.

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    So, 7 years on the forum, and you still can't use the quote function. It's not the first time. Maybe that's the reason you're having problems learning game. No seriously, I'm not flaming you, but if you keep making the simplest mistakes, without even realizing it, how are you going to learn game? You need 1on1 hands-on coaching, for a long time, with someone specializing in inner game issues. Maybe you're gonna need a non-game coach or therapist for that part.

    I believe this is what you wanted to say:

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    That's not true for all women. Yes you can run into a girl or a few girls who are approachable and friendly enough to engage in a conversation, but the 8,'s 9,'s and 10's either usually have boy friends with them, or have this very stuck up look on there faces and I have approached women like this who right away have attitude and a some what standoffish personality way about them.

    The fact is, its a numbers game. When I say guys like me, the harsh reality is, a guy like me who's 44 years old, 5'8 at best, average looking at best walking up to two stunning 20 some year old models is more then likly going to get rejected simply because these women have options. That and the fact you see so many of these young stunners with guys who look like basket ball players there so tall. Or guys who are GQ in looks.

    Take a guy "like me" who doesn't fit the bill who has never in his life had any success and yea, giving up seemes to be my only option. It's a lot harder then your short, in your mid 40's, most attractive younger women have steady tall, above average looking boy friends. The reality is, these women may talk to you just to be polite but no intrest at all. So when the odds are that stacked against you, to save what little self esteem you have, you ask your self is it even worth it?
    And 7 years later you still have the same negative beliefs and now you lecture an instructor about how the world is.

    Stop whining or get off the forums, we're done enabling your victim mentality. Grab your balls and man up or keep being alone and miserable.

    Read this http://www.theattractionforums.com/f...our-roles.html

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    Got news for you. I haven't been on this form for seven straight years. I come on this form when I feel like it that hasn't been seven full years, year after year. And by the way you sound like a broken record yourself the minute somebody expresses their feelings you jump all over them and call them negative and tell them to get off the forums. Or maybe what you're really afraid of is I'm telling the truth and other people can relate to what I'm saying and you're going to lose out on a Boot Camp sale.



    Wp




    Quote Originally Posted by Hurley View Post
    So, 7 years on the forum, and you still can't use the quote function. It's not the first time. Maybe that's the reason you're having problems learning game. No seriously, I'm not flaming you, but if you keep making the simplest mistakes, without even realizing it, how are you going to learn game? You need 1on1 hands-on coaching, for a long time, with someone specializing in inner game issues. Maybe you're gonna need a non-game coach or therapist for that part.

    I believe this is what you wanted to say:

    And 7 years later you still have the same negative beliefs and now you lecture an instructor about how the world is.

    Stop whining or get off the forums, we're done enabling your victim mentality. Grab your balls and man up or keep being alone and miserable.

    Read this http://www.theattractionforums.com/f...our-roles.html

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    Well, you found this forum 7 years ago, assumingly because you wanted to get good with women. In your very first thread you started lecturing people about what doesn't work, and why your situation is special, and how you are not good looking. Literally first thread.

    I am sure a lot of people can relate to your limiting beliefs. And that's the problem, because if they are influenced by you, you're enabling their limiting beliefs, robbing them of the opportunity to get good.

    But you don't care about that, do you. You would rather drag some other people down to your level, to not feel alone in your misery, than you would like to improve your life.

    You are like a living, walking version of the former pua hate forum and it's getting tiresome

    Btw, do you think I work for Love Systems?

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    Wolfpack I wouldn't worry about how they come at ya even if it sounds harsh, but they have some good advice and we are here to help. Sure it is no bs straight to the point, but it is true. The only way to debunk everything you said is to go out and practice. The mall is my play ground, even though in a recent post I think I got banned from Forever 21

    I am a 32 yr old overweight black guy that still lives with his parents, I do tech support (not rich), I watch hentai, japanese cartoon porn, don't judge me it is a art form quoted Dean Winchester from Supernatural, lol. I am more attracted to white women, latin women, asian women. Which some times due to inner game issues I think they don't like black men.

    I read Vox's article on day game and decided to give it a try so I went out and a lot of inner game stuff came to my head when I saw a lot of pretty women. Before I started I also got the audio on inner game by Braddock from the Super Conference and it was really helpful. Was able to approach 3 white HBs and they were really nice and told me I was sweet for saying that. Right now my goal is to approach and transition, not going for the number pull or date setup yet. I want to be comfortable with the approach first. Ever since I started going to the mall and approaching and going up to girls or female clerks telling them they look gorgeous, pretty, cute, or adorable. I have never gotten slapped, called a cartoon porn love perv, or any of the fears that prevented me from approaching. I get a lot of good responses because since I go out to have fun with this, I think that is why none of the negative stuff has happened... yet or I am in the zone I don't remember.

    Now when I go to the mall or before I go. I warm up. I would converse with people on the way or talk to the clerks which are paid to be nice to you to get their business, which I got from that inner game audio from the Super Conference dvd. Then get into the approach habit and go into the stores and approach a HB. Still need to get into transitioning and conversation with them, but it is awesome getting that reply back from them like you lite up their day. Also, I have been noticing I think women are wanting to get picked up during the day. Hell I came across a lot of women wearing short shorts that show their ass cheeks and if they bend over you get a beaver shot like from Fatal Attraction. You tell me you think a girl not wanting to be picked up or hit on would wear things to the mall tempting men?

    All and all if anything is holding you back from meeting good quality women due to inner game. Don't worry bro, everyone has been there and there are a lot people here to help. You could watch a video on youtube. Hootie has a miami day game which is good. Read articles on approach anxiety and put it to practice here is one I found which is cool from r/ seduction reddit. https://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/c...om_of_extreme/

    Purchase a book on daytime dating from here and give it a try. If inner game is hurting you can purchase a audio on it, some of the instructors have good articles on it youtube vids or writing articles.

    Purchase a bootcamp where you get people that can show and help you get to the level you want and if you are not satisfied you can get your money back, which is pretty cool. If you think you waste the money you can get it back, but you might be satisfied with the knowledge, advice, and help it offers.

    Find a wing that can push you into practicing during the night and day. Once you get that one good interaction and don't give up after a few blow outs or rejections and just have fun meeting women. You will notice that big boost to confidence and inner game.

    I still get that approach anxiety, hell I went to a bar last night even though it was dead. There was 2 HBs and no one, even people that are better looking, in shape, and other better qualities than me that I can't think of. They never approached them.

    Still working on it, but I know to help curb it I need to go out and practice and just have fun with this.

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    giving up seemes to be my only option.
    Oh well, that's probably best then for you to be honest.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH 2016 - www.datingcoachvox.com

    FOLLOW ME: Twitter / Facebook

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    Wow you must get laid a lot hanging around advice forms all the time... It seems the very few times I've been on here it's always you who comes on here flaming me for posting anything reminding me how many years I've been on here...

    Ok... Put yourself in my shoes. You try hard to work on your looks with what you have to work with. You're on the road all week from Tuesday till Saturday then you get Sunday Monday off. You come back to the city were you know pretty much nobody and you have no friends at all because they're all on the road truck driving or they're married or you wouldn't want to hang around with them anyway because they're even bigger losers than you are.

    You go to your favourite restaurant lounge just a notice that sure a lot of beautiful people dating each other no average below average looking guys with these hot girls. And you wonder why you have these inner game issues. Two weekends ago I was at this restaurant and this Hooters girl who I recognized young little tight 18-year-old walks in with her tall 6 foot five masculine boyfriend who looks just like Pharrell Williams... And in the town I live in you see a lot of that. Beautiful people dating beautiful people. Or anybody who's younger and attractive has some steady boyfriend.

    Just yesterday I walk into a gas station and here's another young attractive girl with her good-looking boyfriend who is in comparison to Paul walker. Gee, so why am I so negative and have such negative beliefs. Maybe because everywhere I go it's constantly in my face that this is what I see on a regular basis. I joined eHarmony must've messaged over 230 women never heard back from one other then a girl using fake photos who tried to scam me for $1000 bucks... I was on tinder for three months never heard back from one person yet my buddy is also a good looking can go on their message some girl, say hey what's up and within minutes she replies back to him... But I can't imagine why have so much doubt myself... And for the record I'm not trying to bring anybody down or tell anybody to give up but I am talking reality whether you PUA guys want to admit it or not!

    Now I will admit that there have been some very cute attractive girls who definitely made serious eye contact with me in the shopping malls and yeah I choked and just kept walking and that is something I need to work on. When you're a sensitive guy like me and believe me I didn't ask for this this, this was handed down to me by my fucking biological parents and you've been hurt too many times in your life it is much harder to want to stay in the game especially when the odds are stacked against you.

    So I'm sorry for being so negative and bringing everybody down. All doing is telling my story that's it.

    Wp




    Quote Originally Posted by Hurley View Post
    Well, you found this forum 7 years ago, assumingly because you wanted to get good with women. In your very first thread you started lecturing people about what doesn't work, and why your situation is special, and how you are not good looking. Literally first thread.

    I am sure a lot of people can relate to your limiting beliefs. And that's the problem, because if they are influenced by you, you're enabling their limiting beliefs, robbing them of the opportunity to get good.

    But you don't care about that, do you. You would rather drag some other people down to your level, to not feel alone in your misery, than you would like to improve your life.

    You are like a living, walking version of the former pua hate forum and it's getting tiresome

    Btw, do you think I work for Love Systems?

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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    So I'm sorry for being so negative and bringing everybody down.
    Don't worry bro you are not bringing no one down. Especially the people that have tried, practice, and seen the power of this stuff.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    I am talking reality whether you PUA guys want to admit it or not!
    That reality in my opinion is based off of what the media, some friends, and other people want you to believe. I thought the same too. I thought hot women only went out with good looking, in shape, and rich guys. Lol, there is a bestselling book I saw a while back that cater to that telling you to not go for women that you might be really attracted to and no chance with, but to settle with women that you are less attracted to and have a chance with. Then comes VH1's The Pickup Artist. What intrigue me wasn't Mystery or Matador, but their little friend who didn't have looks. He was able to get a girl dancing around his finger when they went out to prove the system works.
    Keys to the Vip with Cajun. The guy, no offense, looked like a guy my friends would cockblock without breaking a sweat. After watching Cajun, I believe he would use my friends if they tried to cockblock him as fodder to get the girl and my friends would be wondering what the hell just happen as Cajun walks away with the girl while fingering her.
    Mr. M, definitely will not try to offend or say anything bad about him because his teaching helped me steal a HB greek chick from a black guy who looked like Tyrese that was orbiting her and her friend kept telling me she wanted to fuck me. Learned a technique that built up sexual tension on another HB that allowed me to makeout with her in less than 5mins of the interaction and she was thrilled when I told her let me take you home. Let's just say the guy looks like a guy, which no why in hell this guy can pull a playboy playmate like the article stated, boy was I surprised. At the Miami bootcamp the guy had HBs surrounding him while he was chilling and instructing at the same time.

    I also noticed and heard from Fader when I got the Super Conference DVD in Frame Control, which I laughed after see it and noticing it. The competition, which is mostly guys that have the looks and money, don't even approach or wait till they have the guts or liquid courage. I was in downtown Orlando at the bars in Wallstreet and I approached probably 20+ HBs. Didn't care to hookup, just wanted to have fun approaching women. A good amount of them have not even been approached or hit on yet. Hell two guys that were taller than me, in good shape, and looked good was looking at 3 HBs and never even approached them. I told them watch me get slapped and they told me good luck. I approached the HBs and the 3 really liked my company, especially the really hot one out of the 3. She was popping IOIs left and right as I had my arm around her waist fingering her back as her body was resting on mine and her arm around my shoulder.


    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    Now I will admit that there have been some very cute attractive girls who definitely made serious eye contact with me in the shopping malls and yeah I choked and just kept walking and that is something I need to work on. When you're a sensitive guy like me and believe me I didn't ask for this this, this was handed down to me by my fucking biological parents and you've been hurt too many times in your life it is much harder to want to stay in the game especially when the odds are stacked against you.
    In my opinion you should try to go up to store clerks that are paid to be nice and tell them they look pretty and then tell any girl you see they look pretty and telling them to have a good weekend without being outcome dependent, but have fun. It is something I use to get myself to try day game and noticed as I am going out I think women subconsciously want to be picked up or like Vox said to meet a guy that is confident to approached them.

    You have a ton of options to help you with your inner game, online game, day game, and to debunk everything negative you think about women.

    Only you can make that choice.

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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    Wow you must get laid a lot hanging around advice forms all the time...
    Nice try

    Fact is that you've made so many posts about your looks that the moderators started renaming your threads to "Yet another WP thread about his looks", and that's fine, I just skip those threads. But when you give advice from your limiting mindset, then I have to react.

    You've spent at least 7 years envying beautiful guys dating beautiful girls. When will it end?

    1. Stop feeling like a victim. Did you read that article by Fader?
    2. If you're fat, get fit. I don't care if you're a truck driver, eat healthy and take a walk for half an hour a day. If you do those already, good
    3. If you don't like your job or life-situation, start thinking about how you can change it
    4. Get a nice haircut or shave if you're balding
    5. Buy some nice threads
    6. Read some literature about self-worth and confidence or consult with a coach or therapist
    7. Approach some women
    8. Learn game
    9. EOD

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    Yeah I do envy the tall good-looking guys because you always see them with the attractive girls. Your looks probably matter a lot more then whatever game you have. But the fact is there's not a lot you can really do about your looks other then change your wardrobe your haircut, shave or be clean-shaven and trying keep in shape. There's nothing a guy can do about his height once he's past 25 years of age.

    I do have elevator shoes that make me look over 6 feet tall but they're uncomfortable to walk in a long period of time and once you take the shoes off your short again... But I'll tell you I have noticed that dressing up and looking like I'm over 6 feet tall definitely get a lot more noticed by attractive women then when you're short.

    Maybe or something you guys could help me out with. What I really need help with is conversation starters. I don't believe in Canned openers because then you got to keep coming up with bullshit to keep that Canned opener going. What are some good ways to approach a total stranger and not come off as obvious that you're hitting on a or that you're giving her some stupid line and she can tell instantly your just using the line on her. I know ia lot of guys in the videos go up to girls and say excuse me I just wanted to say how beautiful you are and had to come over and meet you.

    I personally think this is too over-the-top especially if you're a guy who shy just starting out. Sure you're just giving her a compliment but, I personally wouldn't feel comfortable walking up to somebody and just saying that.

    Some the things I've been thinking about using for example you see somebody or a group of girls and ask them if they're from this town and what are some places they like to go sightseeing or fun places to visit and if the conversations going good then you could just say well what are you guys doing later on I have no plans would you like to get together. Or ask them what their favourite restaurant in town would be or a place to go for drinks and you can always ask them later on during the week if they would like to go to that.

    Wp



    QUOTE=Hurley;1030870]Nice try

    Fact is that you've made so many posts about your looks that the moderators started renaming your threads to "Yet another WP thread about his looks", and that's fine, I just skip those threads. But when you give advice from your limiting mindset, then I have to react.

    You've spent at least 7 years envying beautiful guys dating beautiful girls. When will it end?

    1. Stop feeling like a victim. Did you read that article by Fader?
    2. If you're fat, get fit. I don't care if you're a truck driver, eat healthy and take a walk for half an hour a day. If you do those already, good
    3. If you don't like your job or life-situation, start thinking about how you can change it
    4. Get a nice haircut or shave if you're balding
    5. Buy some nice threads
    6. Read some literature about self-worth and confidence or consult with a coach or therapist
    7. Approach some women
    8. Learn game
    9. EOD
    [/QUOTE]

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    Your terrible beliefs just shine through in your posts and since you've put across no indication that you're willing to even shine a light on your beliefs and challenge them then my only advice to you remains the same as it was the last time......you need to give up. This is not for you.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    I just had phone coaching session with one of your instructors... I am making small strides and trying to approach women. There's a very good reason why I believe what I believe because of the way I've been treated in the past. And I'm trying to overcome that.

    Maybe you should quit calling yourself a dating coach telling people to give up. To be honest

    Wp




    I
    Quote Originally Posted by Vox View Post
    Your terrible beliefs just shine through in your posts and since you've put across no indication that you're willing to even shine a light on your beliefs and challenge them then my only advice to you remains the same as it was the last time......you need to give up. This is not for you.

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    There's a very good reason why I believe what I believe because of the way I've been treated in the past. And I'm trying to overcome that.
    Everyone here is hoping that you do.

    Having a belief, whether erroneous or not is one thing. But choosing to constantly put down those beliefs on forums and stubbornly hold them as true when you are trying to change is not productive.

    Choosing to lay out your beliefs in each and every post you make will hurt you and will keep you in a cycle that means we're still here in a another 7 years time.

    Understanding you hold a belief, but that it might not be true and might be a hindrance to you is another thing all together and that can be worked with. That is the attitude and approach you want to have.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    Look at me !!! I'm another Lovesystems success story !
    I've been in and out of this forum for well over 7 years, still can't cut and paste a paragraph, have read Magic Bullets cover to cover, routines manual, some audio series etc. Unofficially done a bootcamp and as a result have graduated back to net porn !!! So I empathize with wolfpack, Vox makes some positive comments and Hurley sounds like a douche bag with his trademark put-downs.

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    Did you do a bootcamp with LS job20?

    Learning game is something you do, it's not something that is done to you. Don't blame the teacher for you having learning impairments. Take responsibility for your own progress.

    So, you read some material. But did you also apply it infield? Did you do a tons of approaches? Did you journal about it and track your progress? Did you ask relevant questions and seek out specific knowledge? Did you have focus on your sticking points?

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    The struggles for me is, once I got up to a certain age I think it was 25 years old and in the nightclubs and couldn't figure out why is it that women seem to just walk right by me without even glancing yet I see these other guys talking to girls and everybody looks so natural and having a good time and the girls actually want to be with these guys.

    Then I started to really pay attention to how tall lot of these guys are how masculine they look how confident they look and overall just seem to be better looking than me.

    When you're short and average in looks at best I think the reality is it's going to be a lot harder especially in a small town were most attractive women seem to already have a steady boyfriends and I will say Vox article really touched on something that makes a lot of sense.

    The part where he talks about making excuses about not wanting to approach women because they look unapproachable grumpy that sort of thing. That's probably 100% of the reasons why I don't approach because I just feel like if I even dare going up to these women they are just gonna look at me like who the fuck are you and why are you even talking to me!??

    And the harsh reality is you are going to run into women like that for whatever reason they seem to have that attitude. At least in this town that I live in the few times I have approached women they seem to have almost a standoffish attitude when all you're doing is asking for directions or something.

    Last Monday I decided to go to a new restaurant lounge a friend of mine was telling me about and I walk in there and theres maybe four people in that place and only two attractive waitresses working and the minute I walk in these two waitresses were just hanging around with these two dudes the whole time I was there, and these two chicks with these guys talking with these guys laughing with these guys and I'm sitting there all by myself and the only time the bartender waitress even came up to me was just to see if I wanted anything else then she went right back to those two guys and was laughing at flirting with them.

    And this seems to be the story of my life... It's like life is always shitting on me just because I really want to try and get good at this and all it's doing is shoving it in my face that I'm not even in the picture let alone do I have a chance with any of these women. Same thing last weekend attractive female bartender was serving me and when she was done her shift she comes out in every day clothes and sits right next to the guy next to me and she's talking to him the whole time...

    And once again I'm sitting here thinking for fuck sakes can I not just once get a fucking break in life! There seems to be a lot of couples here in the town I live in and not very many single women from what I've seen. And I'm sorry but the advice of why don't you just move to another city??? I mean get real. I will say though going to other cities are even smaller towns were the women might be more available is definitely an option.

    I truly believe that to get good at this you have to be the best looking you possibly can. Trying get yourself above average in looks no matter what it takes because I'll tell you from experience it's simply much easier to attract women then going up to these chicks and literally getting blown off right off the hop because they're not attracted to you physically.

    When I was doing steroids and my body was in great shape and I was walking around with a tight muscle shirts on, dark tanned I've definitely seen attractive young girls checking me out big time. I don't recommend going on steroids it was just something I wanted to try and I did it I wouldn't go back to it. Too many negative side effects. Now I'm trying to diet eat properly and trying to lose the gut.

    The other thing if you do see an attractive girl who's definitely looking your way and smiling don't hesitate just go up to her (easier said than done of course) but you may not get another opportunity like that again. I know too many times I fucked up and just kept walking because I didn't know what to say, I didn't know how she was going to react and didn't want to come across as some losers so I thought I better just keep walking and enjoy the moment a cute girls actually looking at me Who seemed interested

    Wp

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    With me it really comes down to shyness. And when I go walking around the shopping malls and see all these good-looking dudes with these attractive young girls I think to myself, well I guess that's why I'm single. Because I don't look like these guys

    Wp



    Quote Originally Posted by Vox View Post
    Everyone here is hoping that you do.

    Having a belief, whether erroneous or not is one thing. But choosing to constantly put down those beliefs on forums and stubbornly hold them as true when you are trying to change is not productive.

    Choosing to lay out your beliefs in each and every post you make will hurt you and will keep you in a cycle that means we're still here in a another 7 years time.

    Over all my my real sticking point shyness... That's really what it comes down to. And when you walk around the shopping malls and see always good looking deals with these really attractive young girls you think yourself, well I guess that's why I'm single because I don't look like them.

    Wp

    Understanding you hold a belief, but that it might not be true and might be a hindrance to you is another thing all together and that can be worked with. That is the attitude and approach you want to have.

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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    There seems to be a lot of couples here in the town I live in and not very many single women from what I've seen. And I'm sorry but the advice of why don't you just move to another city??? I mean get real
    Yes, get real. You can't learn to swim if there's no water.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    With me it really comes down to shyness. I want to go walking around the shopping malls and see all these good-looking dudes with these attractive young girls I think to myself, well I guess that's why I'm single. Because I don't look like these guys
    And this will be the last time you express that feeling on this forum. Enough is enough.

    Stop verbalizing your emphasis on looks. Start journaling about what you do to overcome your shyness. What have you done so far.

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    Yea get real Tank! Like you think it's so easy for people to just pick up and move to another city in the off chance i might actually meet somebody?? I make over $122,000 a year I'm not just going to leave because I might meet somebody in another city.


    Quote Originally Posted by Tank View Post
    Yes, get real. You can't learn to swim if there's no water.
    And this will be the last time you express that feeling on this forum. Enough is enough.
    Or what...? You're going to band me..? Go right ahead big guy doesn't hurt my feelings one bit...

    Quote Originally Posted by Tank View Post
    Stop verbalizing your emphasis on looks. Start journaling about what you do to overcome your shyness. What have you done so far.
    Once again PUA's in the community trying to preach that looks don't matter when everybody in the real world knows that they do! You know I so many guys drop out of this within a year cause they find out the truth that no matter how much material they read or Boot Camp's they take it's still the Alpha males, the tall the handsome the guys who already established themselves in the clubs are the ones getting the girls not guys trying to use the stupid routines you guys teach.

    I'm trying to do as much as I can in the two days that I'm home and that's all I get is two days. I ordered a book from Amazon tharone of your instructors suggested I read and I'm going to try to do more approaches when there's actually single girls around that's not already getting hit up by guys before I even show up.

    Wp
    Last edited by Tank; 06-24-2016 at 06:12 AM. Reason: Fixed broken quotes

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    Then if its all looks dude why haven't you given up already? There's literally no point to anything you're doing if that's the case. Why are you wasting your time ordering books on Amazon? Just give up then and go live a different life. It'll be way easier.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    Yes, get real. You can't learn to swim if there's no water.
    And this will be the last time you express that feeling on this forum. Enough is enough.
    I think Tank wants you to stop with the negative stuff because it seems you want to learn this stuff, but you are sub-communicating to yourself to quit and don't try to learn this skill set.

    Once again PUA's in the community trying to preach that looks don't matter when everybody in the real world knows that they do! You know I so many guys drop out of this within a year cause they find out the truth that no matter how much material they read or Boot Camp's they take it's still the Alpha males, the tall the handsome the guys who already established themselves in the clubs are the ones getting the girls not guys trying to use the stupid routines you guys teach.
    Looks can get you so far only a foot in the door. I remember the scene from Grown Ups when the girls were infatuated with the Alpha male looking guy at the pool, until he opened his mouth.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4K8EH0GAA9Q

    Also, a good example even though it is a movie, but it was really interesting. The remake of Planet of The Apes. All, the big strong gorillas were being lead by a smart, fast, and small monkey. The only movie I remember seeing a tall muscle bound good looking guy run a country was in Idiocracy and he made everyone believe that since he drinks sports drinks plants need them, too. It is what the plants crave because it has electrolytes. Lol.

    From experience I have seen, heard, and experience this process in action, which works. I watched VH1's Pick Up Artist and tried it out one night. I went cave man, trying to kiss her, on a cute blonde that dyed her head red because later on I found out that the carpet didn't match the drapes . She rejected me so I told her okay trying to play hard to get. I remembered them saying to try to relocate her, so I asked her to follow me into the lobby entrance because there was a nice long couch there and she followed me as I held her hand. She told me she was training in Culinary, told me she had tattoos and I think I teased her on them being stickers she spent a quarter on and she laughed. I moved her back to the dancefloor and later on she let me kiss her with some tongue action. As we were leaving the club she told me don't take this the wrong way, but I don't sleep with black guys. Remembering about Mystery saying about test, I told her I don't sleep with black guys either we have something in common. She busted out laughing and when I got to her car I started to make out with her and fingered the crap out of her. Then hopped into her car she was giving me a BJ, until a cop drove by and almost saw us which me, her, and the cop looked at each other. The girl said I am not going to jail for this. She never returned my text or calls, but still it was a fun night.

    I took a bootcamp to give this a try because even though I brought magic bullets I was too impatient to understand some of it. The bootcamp showed me how to be a little bit natural and you don't have to use routines. They are just there as fillers or to have fun with, but shouldn't be a crutch. I remember at my Miami bootcamp with Mr.M, he told me to act like the creepy touchy feel guy because they noticed I was the shy type. So, I saw a 5 set of hot white women who I found out that were grad students. I opened with the routine sorry I am late was stuck in traffic. They all looked at me and smiled when I told them they look pretty. I locked in by resting my head on a blonde one in a nice red dress. I just started talking about my Navy time in Japan and mentioned to the girl I had my head on that this pillow is relaxing I might fall asleep referring to her lap. They laughed and one asked me for my name. After my bootcamp I was having fun with direct game. I went to a club in Daytona Beach, Florida and saw this hot greek chick looking over the dancefloor and a black guy that was better looking than me and taller hoovering over her. I learned to acknowledge the guy and then talk to the girl. I went to him said sup bro gave him a hi five which he accepted and went direct on the greek chick pulling her away from the guy as I grabbed her by her belt loops and smashed her pelvis into mine, she smiled. Later, I ejected from the greek chick and saw a hot latin chick with her ugly girlfriend. I went direct on the latin chick did the same with her that I did to the greek chick and she complied by putting her arms around me. Found out it was her birthday and I told myself fuck it. I told her let me give you a birthday kiss and told her come her. We started making out heavily and I used a routine Starlight mentioned at my bootcamp telling the girl let me take you home or lets go home, don't remember how it went. But, the girl told her ugly friend we are leaving. They hopped in my car and it was a fun night.

    I only dropped out, in my opinion and why I am having fun with hitting on women and going out to do so is because I was too serious and outcome dependent. I forgot to have fun with this, which now I am doing since I would approach any hot girl when I am in the zone because I was having fun during the night and during the day at the mall I would just approach direct on any girl in the shopping outlets at the mall, and setting attainable and fun goals, still need work on approaching moving targets. The reason I got back in this is because I want to find a girl I am attracted to not one that the media and my friends say I should settle with and don't go for the hot ones because they are out of your league which they tell me. Also, there is a married blonde woman who is Human Resources at my job that has a black on blonde fetish and wants to either fuck me or cuckold her husband while I bang her while he watches. Which I try to avoid her like the plague, but temptation is a bitch.

    Just give up then and go live a different life. It'll be way easier.
    In my opinion Vox isn't trying to make you give up on meeting women, just the process in learning how to meet the more desirable ones. You can still meet women, but it is rare to meet a desirable, independent, and sexy woman without knowing how to approach her and make her attracted to you. Without the skillset you can meet ones less desirable, not that good looking, but they can be fuckable. My coworker lost his wife of 7yrs to a woman that was more alpha than him, but now he is getting laid by lonely, ok to decent divorce women, with kids. The guy would brag about it, but when I asked him to go direct or try this on this hot girl at the mall he didn't. He told me it is not his style and he played it safe because he is too much of a nice guy and he is aware that might be reason why his wife left him for a butch woman. But, he is getting some. Just the ones he is getting and bragging about are not attractive to me. I think one looked like Shrek.

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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    Yea get real Tank! Like you think it's so easy for people to just pick up and move to another city
    I know how difficult that is. I did it. I ripped my life up by the root. Sold the house. Changed job. Lost most of my old friends to make room for new ones who didn't hold me back. No one said it would be easy. Things really worth doing rarely are.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    I make over $122,000 a year I'm not just going to leave because I might meet somebody in another city.
    No one said to move to meet someone. But you need to create the circumstances that makes it possible for you to learn game. If you can't move, drive to a good location or do something else to get in practice, well then you made your choice. Your salary is more important. That's a simple question of priorities

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    Or what...? You're going to band me..? Go right ahead big guy doesn't hurt my feelings one bit...
    We volunteer because we like to help guys. I'm sorry to hear you think we support this forum to "feel like big guys" or hurt people's feelings...

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    Once again PUA's in the community trying to preach that looks don't matter
    Those words were never uttered in this thread. You seem to be seeing what you want to see. Read up on affirmation bias

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    it's still the Alpha males, the tall the handsome the guys who already established themselves in the clubs are the ones getting the girls
    I am not tall, I'm definitely not handsome, most would say the opposite, I'm balding, I'm not rich, I was as far as established on the club scene as you can be. I still need to lose a lot of weight. Today I get girls, more than I have time for. What one man can do, another man can do. Your argument is invalid.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    not guys trying to use the stupid routines you guys teach
    It's a long time since Love Systems stopped teaching routines as a foundation of game. Yeah, the Routines Manuals are still around, they are great inspiration, and because fear of running out of things to say is one of the biggest sticking points for many guys, sometimes student's get a canned opener or a routine to get them started. Routines can especially be a help for someone learning game on their own. Anyone who claims that Love Systems is about routines is living in the past.

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfpack View Post
    the off chance i might actually meet somebody??
    When you learn game, it's not by chance anymore. Game puts you in control of your dating life

    Last time. Stop repeating how unfortunate you are. Start a journal. Write about what you do to progress. Then people will be very happy to help you, a lot. But no one can help people if they don't help themselves.

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    There's no point in you and I debating and arguing on this. It's not going to get either of us any where. So, I will keep a Journal and I will post it on here. I'll try to keep the self pity and negativity to a dull roar... So far I've been trying to improve upon my looks with cosmetics that make you look younger and fresher looking skin. I spent $340 on some dressy clothes. I've been complementing store clerks on their jewellery or there hairstyle to get out of my comfort zone. So far that's about it but I making small progress.

    Wp




    Quote Originally Posted by Tank View Post
    I know how difficult that is. I did it. I ripped my life up by the root. Sold the house. Changed job. Lost most of my old friends to make room for new ones who didn't hold me back. No one said it would be easy. Things really worth doing rarely are.

    No one said to move to meet someone. But you need to create the circumstances that makes it possible for you to learn game. If you can't move, drive to a good location or do something else to get in practice, well then you made your choice. Your salary is more important. That's a simple question of priorities

    We volunteer because we like to help guys. I'm sorry to hear you think we support this forum to "feel like big guys" or hurt people's feelings...

    Those words were never uttered in this thread. You seem to be seeing what you want to see. Read up on affirmation bias

    I am not tall, I'm definitely not handsome, most would say the opposite, I'm balding, I'm not rich, I was as far as established on the club scene as you can be. I still need to lose a lot of weight. Today I get girls, more than I have time for. What one man can do, another man can do. Your argument is invalid.

    It's a long time since Love Systems stopped teaching routines as a foundation of game. Yeah, the Routines Manuals are still around, they are great inspiration, and because fear of running out of things to say is one of the biggest sticking points for many guys, sometimes student's get a canned opener or a routine to get them started. Routines can especially be a help for someone learning game on their own. Anyone who claims that Love Systems is about routines is living in the past.

    When you learn game, it's not by chance anymore. Game puts you in control of your dating life

    Last time. Stop repeating how unfortunate you are. Start a journal. Write about what you do to progress. Then people will be very happy to help you, a lot. But no one can help people if they don't help themselves.
    Last edited by Tank; 06-25-2016 at 04:43 AM. Reason: Fixed broken quote

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    The problem was no instructor answered my questions in the forums and I'm talking a while back. All the notes I took don't make much sense so I don't have a record of what was taught in class. That's $2000 down the drain. I believe LS has the same policy, while other dating companies let you have a record of the class. After all, why should you pay for something you've already paid for twice ? What they don't tell you is a bootcamp won't get you laid and when you've been away from the game you forget everything. Same old LS.
    Hurley, remember there are no bad students, only bad teachers ! I love your arrogance and dismissive attitude. Watching you absolve your colleagues of all responsibility by saying I and people like me have a learning difficulty is insulting. You have no idea what its like. Hurley, you show the social maturity and sensitivity of a child.

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    All I want to know is, is wolfpack 321ren?
    View Full Profile: Click Here 200 + Reviews (Most In Company History): http://www.theattractionforums.com/t...iew_fader.html (watch my journey from student to approach coach, to instructor, to master instructor, to stripper destroyer).

    Best quote from a workshop review ever "Overall this bootcamp was a short colombian 10, his teaching ability is a 10, and his game is a 10."

    My Bootcamp Schedule:
    NOPE

    Don't Be A Victim (click, read & change your life)

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    : There comes a point in everyone's life where they either have their dreams or the reasons they dont. You're the hero of your own story..... write a good one.

    Try Walking In My Shoes
    You'll Stumble In My Footsteps


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    Quote Originally Posted by job20 View Post
    All the notes I took don't make much sense so I don't have a record of what was taught in class
    If you are a student of LS, use The Lounge, the guys will help you get back on track

    Quote Originally Posted by job20 View Post
    What they don't tell you is when you've been away from the game you forget everything
    Of course. If you stop doing something, you get worse at it. Can't really blame anyone but yourself for not following through

    Quote Originally Posted by job20 View Post
    Hurley, watching you absolve your colleagues of all responsibility
    Hurley is not an instructor, he's a student who took a bootcamp

    Quote Originally Posted by job20 View Post
    You have no idea what its like
    Don't dismiss other guy's efforts and struggle just because they came out successful on the other side. We all went through the same shit. Self-pity is addictive and will destroy you. Time to face reality instead.

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    Who??
    I don't understand what you're asking.

    Wp


    Quote Originally Posted by Fader View Post
    All I want to know is, is wolfpack 321ren?

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