How many approaches do I need to get good at Day Game?

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  1. #1
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    How many approaches do I need to get good at Day Game?

    I've been doing direct daygame for almost 6 month now. Although I approach, I feel like every time I go out, I am starting all over again. Especially in winter, like today, I only made 2 half ass approaches in 2 hours. I feel like a lot of my energy is spent overcoming approach anxiety, and I am not doing much to improve the rest of the game.

    I know everyone is different, so a little bit about me. I am a pretty soft spoke shy guy who takes a while to make friends. I've been with my share of women, so I am not unfamiliar with the females. So, for someone like me, how many approaches do you I need to make significant progress. Right now I average 15-30 approaches a month.

    I got Soul's Day Time Dating book. My goal is to get this skill set down in 1 year. I feel like I am not on track.

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.

    P-X



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    As many as it takes really, as an obvious answer...
    Keep in mind that for this to be more natural for 'unnaturals' and to be able to have a great conversation with a complete stranger, its going to take practice until it becomes apart of your lifestyle.
    Talk to strangers everyday. stop them on the street and try to have as long of a conversation as you can without it getting or feeling awkard for the person, then try to go alittle bit longer the next set by trying little things here and there. Whether it be with your speech, body language, or how you steer the conversation.
    when i was starting out, i liked to approach everyone in general and basically have the same conversation then play with little things in what i did during the converation. Like trying a different angle in how i stood, trying to put or more pauses in my sentences at different places in the conv., ect...
    once i found something that worked i builded on that and i could have a great conversation really easily without having to rely on using the same converation topics over and over again.
    Get good conversation skills, tweek the topics, and they'll come...

    Hope this helps man! and Good Luck!

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    There is a standard exercise for overcoming AA. Open LOTS of sets, just say hello or have a short conversation and then eject.

    That's all. Don't try to generate attraction, don't try to get phone numbers, etc. Just open, short conversation, eject, and move on to the next target.

    If you do this enough you should desensitize yourself to AA. Then you will need to work on doing more than just opening, but first things first.

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    Just read one of Farmer's post. He went out 2 days a week for 6-8 hours each time for 6 month. I only approach while running errands. I think like working out, there's a threshhold I need to exceed in order to improve. Like if you only work out 2x week, you r just trying to get back to baseline each time.

    I don't want to be obsessed with PU, but I probably need to up my intensity a bit. If I can make ~ 50 approaches a month, I think I'll start to see improvements.

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    hahahah....the most toughest things in life are the most easiest and obvious...

    lately i realized in the game that ppl get all pumped up after reading the game and pickup stuff....but wht they dont realize is tht its all bout pushing your comfort zone,there's gonna be a lot of blood,sweat and tears before u reach your goal.

    15-30 approaches a month is quite low....u need to do better than that...

    Things u can do to get in habit of approaching:
    1] get a wing....who'll push you
    2]try some NLP anchoring stuff by hypnotica.....it works like magic....
    3]Keep talking to random people...as in day game there might be scarcity of sets which might get u off your state
    4]keep doing newbie drills...although u will forget them once u get into habit of approaching

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    Re

    Quote Originally Posted by Project X View Post
    I've been doing direct daygame for almost 6 month now. Although I approach, I feel like every time I go out, I am starting all over again. Especially in winter, like today, I only made 2 half ass approaches in 2 hours. I feel like a lot of my energy is spent overcoming approach anxiety, and I am not doing much to improve the rest of the game.

    I know everyone is different, so a little bit about me. I am a pretty soft spoke shy guy who takes a while to make friends. I've been with my share of women, so I am not unfamiliar with the females. So, for someone like me, how many approaches do you I need to make significant progress. Right now I average 15-30 approaches a month.

    I got Soul's Day Time Dating book. My goal is to get this skill set down in 1 year. I feel like I am not on track.

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.

    P-X
    It does take quite a bit more than 15-30 a month. I'd say more like 15-30 a week. I think that most daytime pua's are doing 15-30 a week. It's important to approach a lot because that's how we learn. As you approach more it's starts to feel natural, like you really are a Casanova and not just a pua. What happens is you'll start to pick up on women's slight cues. You will start to naturally connect with her, without even trying. Your smile and her smile will mesh together, but it won't seemed force, rather it will just happen.
    This is what happened with me when I went from doing 10 approaches a week to 40 approaches. It was as if something clicked, and all the sudden I was the womanizing playboy, even though I'm not a good-looking guy.
    Try it out. Go downtown, where all the women are walking around. It's relatively easy to do 4 or 5 approaches an hour on busy city streets. Go out twice a week. In a 4 or 5 hour period you'll be able to do 20 approaches without a sweat. Drop into a few bars and practice some night game. Do this twice a week, and soon approaching becomes easy, almost natural, kind of like you're just this neat, friendly guy who talks to everyone and likes everyone. It seems like a big deal now because you grew up in the public school system where teachers were constantly telling you to be quiet, and if you didn't get accepted into the cool click you learned to walk the halls alone like a mouse. It's all BS though. You can be the outgoing, funny, interesting guy.

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    Impossible to answer, nor should you look to answer that kind of question.

    Just run your own race, work on your game in small chunks, journal and watch the progress. It may be slow, it may be quick, it may be a combination of both at different levels of learning.

    A great way to desensitise to AA, and something I've given to students in the past to great effect is to approach at least one person each and every single day. This was originally an idea Keychain wrote about in this article here: Forming The Approach Habit - Keychain

    Do that on top of more intense practice on free days, presumably the weekend.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH 2016 - www.datingcoachvox.com

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    I do 60 / day = I have totaled 15000 approaches

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    Quote Originally Posted by Project X View Post

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.
    I know this was asked on 2010 but maybe someone else is reading...

    Trust the process and do it until you get the results you desire, and tweak and refine to your advantage. You can do lots of sets but if you don't approach with a certain mindset and to learn, you might not learn much.

    Everyone is different so giving a realistic feedback is really difficult and even impossible to give. One person will have many issues, while the other won't have as much. and so forth.

    When I stopped asking this question and embraced the wisdom, that I'm all in no matter how long it takes, then the question didn't matter to me as much. Instead I trusted the process because you can get into this place like most guys do and whinge, complain, over think stuff and not just doing the work to learn to get better with women.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    I do 60 / day = I have totaled 15000 approaches
    I love that t-shirt, where can I get one? lol

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    Hello Project X, it depends of people, some people would be good after 100 approaches, some other after 10000 approaches they are not good. But to have an idea, with 1000 approaches, you will be know in your case. You can do it in one year.

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    I would recommend doing 10 per day where you are actually trying, i.e. do not eject, and do this 2 days per week (more than 2 if you can, but 2 is sufficient). Sure you can approach and eject after 30 seconds all day just to see how high you can get the number, but that's pointless IME, those are not real sets. if you think about it, quality is what matters. you want to optimize the quantity for progress-in-quality. 10 per day, 2 days per week, and actually try to get laid

    Also, do not worry about blowouts. blowouts are not bad. if you are getting blown out some sort of majority of the time, then yeah something is off for sure... but you should not be attempting to have no blowouts or to minimize blowouts, it doesnt matter. try to get laid with one of the ten each day

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    Quote Originally Posted by Project X View Post
    I've been doing direct daygame for almost 6 month now. Although I approach, I feel like every time I go out, I am starting all over again. Especially in winter, like today, I only made 2 half ass approaches in 2 hours. I feel like a lot of my energy is spent overcoming approach anxiety, and I am not doing much to improve the rest of the game.

    I know everyone is different, so a little bit about me. I am a pretty soft spoke shy guy who takes a while to make friends. I've been with my share of women, so I am not unfamiliar with the females. So, for someone like me, how many approaches do you I need to make significant progress. Right now I average 15-30 approaches a month.

    I got Soul's Day Time Dating book. My goal is to get this skill set down in 1 year. I feel like I am not on track.

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.

    P-X
    It's really on a case by case basis. Some guys are good on the first day. Some guys take months to make it work. For me, I was able to get numbers early on, but I didn't get dates until 9 months in. I didn't get closes until a year from that point.

    THE MOST SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE IN THE WORLD COMMIT TO SUCCESS REGARDLESS OF HOW LONG IT TAKES!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Project X View Post
    I've been doing direct daygame for almost 6 month now. Although I approach, I feel like every time I go out, I am starting all over again. Especially in winter, like today, I only made 2 half ass approaches in 2 hours. I feel like a lot of my energy is spent overcoming approach anxiety, and I am not doing much to improve the rest of the game.

    I know everyone is different, so a little bit about me. I am a pretty soft spoke shy guy who takes a while to make friends. I've been with my share of women, so I am not unfamiliar with the females. So, for someone like me, how many approaches do you I need to make significant progress. Right now I average 15-30 approaches a month.

    I got Soul's Day Time Dating book. My goal is to get this skill set down in 1 year. I feel like I am not on track.

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.

    P-X
    The first 2000 are just for practice, so have fun!

    After 2000, then you can start focusing on results.

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    How many approaches do you need to get good?

    As many as it takes.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    I do 60 / day = I have totaled 15000 approaches
    How many hours do you game per day?

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    Quote Originally Posted by flash90 View Post
    It's really on a case by case basis. Some guys are good on the first day. Some guys take months to make it work. For me, I was able to get numbers early on, but I didn't get dates until 9 months in. I didn't get closes until a year from that point.

    THE MOST SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE IN THE WORLD COMMIT TO SUCCESS REGARDLESS OF HOW LONG IT TAKES!
    nice, looks like you improve alot

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    How many approach to get good is a incomplete view of game. One thing is who is your mentor? as that is crucial

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    Quote Originally Posted by ice king View Post
    How many hours do you game per day?
    5h-8h. depends on my stamina.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Project X View Post
    I've been doing direct daygame for almost 6 month now. Although I approach, I feel like every time I go out, I am starting all over again. Especially in winter, like today, I only made 2 half ass approaches in 2 hours. I feel like a lot of my energy is spent overcoming approach anxiety, and I am not doing much to improve the rest of the game.

    I know everyone is different, so a little bit about me. I am a pretty soft spoke shy guy who takes a while to make friends. I've been with my share of women, so I am not unfamiliar with the females. So, for someone like me, how many approaches do you I need to make significant progress. Right now I average 15-30 approaches a month.

    I got Soul's Day Time Dating book. My goal is to get this skill set down in 1 year. I feel like I am not on track.

    The obvious answer is to approach as many sets as I can, but maybe some realistic feedback will get me motivated to really make some progress.

    P-X
    The most successful people in game and business decide that they are going to get good no matter what. THEY ARE COMMITTED. If I told you ten years ago that you could be a master in 10 years, you would have done everything you could to make it happen. It takes time. Some people learn quicker than others. Some people have every advantage, and as soon as they overcome their approach anxiety, they are bosses. Take this process one step at a time and don't worry too much about how much time it takes.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    5h-8h. depends on my stamina.
    Most guys struggle to get in 500 approaches, but your like from another planet.Props.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ice king View Post
    Most guys struggle to get in 500 approaches, but your like from another planet.Props.
    it's because you didn't meet the right people yet. Once you meet them you won't be surprised. I know 2 guys who does more than I.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    it's because you didn't meet the right people yet. Once you meet them you won't be surprised. I know 2 guys who does more than I.
    I don't live in a big city so approaching that many is literally not possible.Out of those 15000 girls, how many do you still keep around?

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    Quote Originally Posted by ice king View Post
    I don't live in a big city so approaching that many is literally not possible.Out of those 15000 girls, how many do you still keep around?
    None.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    I do 60 / day = I have totaled 15000 approaches, 5h-8h. depends on my stamina.
    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    I know 2 guys who does more than I.
    That's ludicrous. If you after the first couple of thousands approaches are even able to approach that many women (without wearing out your dick), then you must be doing something wrong. Stuck in attraction?

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    No Idea. Nowadays it's just automatic. I do it in anywhere, anytime.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    I do 60 / day
    ^ there's no point doing that many. you have to be either ejecting or getting blown out most of the time to even have time

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    Quote Originally Posted by Demiurge View Post
    ^ there's no point doing that many. you have to be either ejecting or getting blown out most of the time to even have time
    Not blown out nor I'm ejecting. 99% are them ejecting.

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    Fifteen thousand (‽) approaches and 99% of them are excusing themselves?

    You either need to count again or you need to change something up very drastically, because that just doesn't seem like the best use of your time.

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    1000

    Quote Originally Posted by JayVocalz View Post
    Hello Project X, it depends of people, some people would be good after 100 approaches, some other after 10000 approaches they are not good. But to have an idea, with 1000 approaches, you will be know in your case. You can do it in one year.
    I agree with Jay. Some men have a certain voice, or a certain look. These kind of guys become pua's easily. Within 100 approaches they are already bedding several women.
    The average pua probably needs to get past the 1000 approach thresh limit. Unfortunately there are those who will need to do 10,000.
    It's really not that uncommon. One of the best pua's in the world did 5,000 approaches before he got a handle on it.
    I have personally done 8,000 approaches in the last 11 years. My game is not that good and it's my own fault. I only did 10 approaches a week for the first 8 years that I was a pua. I was getting laid, but not with the quality and quantity that I wanted. Just recently I started doing 40 approaches a week. I am now having girls crawl all over me, and that's street approach. It's crazy. I've had hot women chase me, and have had to eject out of sets because married women were coming on to me way too aggressively. I don't do married women, but that's my own deal. You can do married women if you want, we won't judge.

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    Quote Originally Posted by portlandboy View Post
    Not blown out nor I'm ejecting. 99% are them ejecting.
    This doesn't seem right. I'm not the best pua in the world, but I only have a 50% ejection rate. Most women like to stop and flirt. My number close rates are roughly 8 to 1, or about one number for every 8 approaches. In grocery stores it's even better, 1 in 4 are number closes.
    You might want to buy the Love Systems routine manual. It will teach you about approaching, attraction, qualifying, and disqualifying. I have also learned in day game to keep the negs and push/pull to a minimum. These chicks are not bar chicks. If they don't like what you say they can just keep walking. I find that in street approach a more friendly gentlemanly manner works best. Body language is important also.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hrang View Post
    How many approaches do you need to get good?

    As many as it takes.
    I think there's a lot of miss-information coming from the big pua's and book sellers. I've been a pua for twelve years and have read every book under the sun, and talked to hundreds of other pua's. Most of the big pua's did 2,000 or more approaches before they got good, some did more. These are the good pua's. Imagine how many more an average dork might have to do.
    In my opinion, most decent puas (decent meaning a guy who gets 10 or more f-closes a year) is probably going to do 5,000 or more approaches before he gets decent at it. And 10 lays a year might be the best he ever does. Sorry, man, it's just life. Some guys are going to be the star on the basketball team, some of us are going to come off the bench and score ten points. You can practice more and more if you want to, but if you aren't tall, and aren't naturally athletic, you'll never be the star. At the very most you might average 12 points a game, but that's still pretty good.
    I think there's this mythical idea that aspiring pua's fall for. They think their bed is going to be full of hb10's in a big pile on top of him, doing all kinds of crazy sex acts. This is rare. Very few men and pua's will ever see this kind of action. It's best to enjoy the women that you do have sex with, and then try to remember the small handfuls of times that you were in bed with an hb10.
    Also, never forget how fast time marches on. You may be 25 today, but 45 tomorrow, with 65 just around the corner. Seriously, do you think you will be bedding 25 year old hot blondes at age 70? Probably not unless you're one of those few men who looks good in his 70's. This is why the pua lifestyle should be considered a hobby, along with the other hobby's that you have.

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    Who the hell still even calls themselves a PUA these days? Damn!

    This question is somewhat irrelevant and not really worth the energy of discussing. Anyone can throw numbers around and we could go with the standard "1000 approaches" blah blah.

    Truth is, you'll get good when you get good. It may take you 100 approaches, it may take you 10,000 (I'd hope not!), who knows. All you really need to focus on is improving yourself, improving your skill set and letting time take care of the rest.
    Vox - Love Systems Instructor
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    NEW WEBSITE LAUNCH 2016 - www.datingcoachvox.com

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    took me 15 approaches.

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    Consistency is king. I probably did 500 approaches before i got decent, but most of those were just on the weekend or when I felt like it and it took several years. Then I did three approaches per day for 30 days and my ability went through the roof.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vox View Post
    Who the hell still even calls themselves a PUA these days? Damn!
    Your own company calls themselves PUAs.

    Why should anyone buy into this "PUA Superconference" when it's own instructors are cutting it down? Damn!

    pua.png

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    Quote Originally Posted by gq1 View Post
    Your own company calls themselves PUAs.

    Why should anyone buy into this "PUA Superconference" when it's own instructors are cutting it down? Damn!

    pua.png
    LOL

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