Overcoming Day Game AA Journal - Page 2

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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Gender:
    Location
    a small town in New Jersey. vist NYC regularlly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    335

    Need to get it into my head that they want to be opened, not that they're looking to catch me in a lie. I suppose when you go direct, this sort of takes care of itself.
    Solid Gold!



  2. #12

    Yay, finally did my first direct approach! Really happy at the minute. Didn't go exactly according to plan, took me an hour of pacing around the mall first, but I did it in the end! Decent sets are really hard to find at this mall during the week, it's no excuse, there was at least 3 I should have opened before the one I did, but it does make very important not to pass up a single set. Anyway, I'm not going to say my approach was the worst ever, mainly because I can't remember much of it, lol, but it certainly wasn't as smooth as I'd hoped. She came around the corner, I went for it before I even had time to think. It's kind of a blur, but I just used the standard opener:

    "Excuse me. Sorry, this is going to seem very forward, but I just noticed you walking by and I had to tell you that I think you're incredibly cute."

    Then her face lit up and she thanked me and started to walk away. I'd opened from the side rather than behind because it happened so fast, so we were side on to the direction she was travelling, making it easier for her to continue on her way than if she'd turned all the way around. I stole Soul's line from here about the way her hair cascaded down to her shoulders being very alluring (I love curly haired girls) and she stopped again to listen about a pace away, then flashed a big smile again and continued off. My next step was going to be the handshake, but I really didn't have time. No idea what my body language was like, but I'm assuming it wasn't great. Think my face was bright red too, it usually gets redder as time goes on in the mall, through a combination of increasing AA and constant walking in the hot mall. Anyway, I left the mall after that since a) I'd already been there an hour, and b) the expression on her face when I called her cute was so amazing that I didn't want her to see me try to open again in case it spoiled the encounter for her. Daft huh, but I don't care at the minute. Can't wait to get out there and open someone else! If I can do another set tomorrow lunch despite my fear of bumping into work colleagues, I'll be ecstatic.

  3. #13

    Feck, didn't approach at all today. Just couldn't get out of my head that someone from work would see me (weather's crappy at the minute so everyone's in the mall, which isn't that big.) Bullshit, I know. In the 45 mins I was out, I saw two sets that I really should have gone for. This is probably the worst regret I've felt since I started this thing a couple of weeks ago, need to remember this feeling and use it tomorrow as a spur to approach.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Gender:
    Location
    a small town in New Jersey. vist NYC regularlly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    335

    I stole Soul 's line from here about the way her hair cascaded down to her shoulders being very alluring (I love curly haired girls)
    This is very good, man i gotta admit your getting better.

    why do I favorite this line? because it shows you have standards. Truth is everyone her in the pick up Community has a set standard of traits physical and personality wise for women that we find attractive. We take these traits and qualify or disqualify based on what we want from a woman.

    for example, you like girls with curly hair. this can help you massively by Opening Direct to a curly haired woman meeting YOUR standards. if she doesn't have curly hair, its not to say you shouldn't open her. but don't Open direct by complimenting her hair if its straightened and flat. its not honest or genuine and she is going to find out eventually that your a liar (big turn off)

    whats great about it too, is that this can help you in night game by disqualifying yourself to her in attraction, or playfully teasing her due to her not meeting your standards and creating a sense of challenge to win you over (which she will eventually in qualifying). Again this has to be genuine to you and really all about what you are looking for in women, there are a lot of them out there and although we want to have sex with all of them (tee hee) we just don't have enough time in life to be interested in getting to know all of them. Props man, im really glad you come to realize this faster than i did =\.

    Feck, didn't approach at all today. Just couldn't get out of my head that someone from work would see me (weather's crappy at the minute so everyone's in the mall, which isn't that big.)
    I think the problem with your AA isnt the fear of getting rejected but perhaps having someone see you talking to a girl you dont know. I want you to imagine that girl you made smile, and imagine all your work buddies faces light up with awe as you do what NON of them can do. Imagine them giving you high fives for it and just live in it for a few minutes as they tell you, your the man who grew a pair. Any amount of money will bet that the girl you opened Monday is thinking exactly that, that why her face light up with attraction. you were (for a moment) that one guy who grew a pair and did what "normal men" do when they see something they like. everyone has a name for him (Alpha-male, Leader, PUA) but i think the name Fiji fits best.

  5. #15

    Another day of no approaches. Really annoyed at myself, so much for pushing on from Tuesday. Hit the gym hard to work off my frustration and had a pretty good session, so small consolation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dirk_Diggler View Post
    I think the problem with your AA isnt the fear of getting rejected but perhaps having someone see you talking to a girl you dont know. I want you to imagine that girl you made smile, and imagine all your work buddies faces light up with awe as you do what NON of them can do. Imagine them giving you high fives for it and just live in it for a few minutes as they tell you, your the man who grew a pair. Any amount of money will bet that the girl you opened Monday is thinking exactly that, that why her face light up with attraction. you were (for a moment) that one guy who grew a pair and did what "normal men" do when they see something they like. everyone has a name for him (Alpha-male, Leader, PUA) but i think the name Fiji fits best.
    Thanks mate, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Going to read this again before I go out at lunch tomorrow and power through this stupid AA.

  6. Quote Originally Posted by Fiji View Post
    Well today was a bit of a failure. I went out at lunch with the intention of trying the fashion compliment opener then ejecting but just couldn't bring myself to open. I honestly couldn't notice anything worth commenting on. 'Hey that's a nice big warm coat', or 'that's a very, er, sensible hat'. Don't know why I didn't just use a different opener rather than walking around looking for someone hot wearing something interesting, I just kind of had it my head that that was the aim for today. Big fail on my part. I did have a couple of conversations with two older/old women on the train which I don't normally do, so I suppose I'm getting a bit more chatty. I also made a quick jokey comment to a girl while waiting to cross the road. Don't think she heard properly but she called me back when I was walking away and asked for directions from me.
    Dun dun dunnn!!!

    You probably didn't realize this at the time, but she wanted you. You need to keep making the progress you're making, and think about her, making her enjoy the encounter - stop worrying about whether or not she thinks you're lying, or is at all interested in you.

    If you're so worried that they'll call you out for "making up something" to open them with, or if she thinks you're "lying", then don't make a big deal about it, brush it off jokingly and lead it straight into a conversation, or better yet, a direct line, "haha, you got me... I already knew where the post office was, I actually saw you from over there and thought you were cute and looked like a fun person.... [compliment/ask genuine question/ask her how her day has been etc.].


    Seriously - this girl that called you back for directions; she began to chase you. How hard do you think it would have been for her to say nothing, and let you leave without a word? Not hard at all, in fact that would have been her easiest option, yet she went to the effort to try and extend the conversation.

    Edit: And what is wrong with commenting on a "big warm coat", if the weather outside is shithouse and you're freezing your testicles off it is a genuine comment. Tell it looks warm and toasty and that the weather is horrid, then lead into a convo.

  7. #17

    Did another approach yesterday, although it took me until the very end of my lunch hour to finally do it.

    I think my problem is that I keep waiting for the perfect set rather than just seizing every opportunity that comes along. The little chase down/open bit is the only part that I feel weird about being seen doing, once I'm in conversation then it's just two people talking and isn't in the least noteworthy to any observers. It's this that's stopping me go for sets that don't happen to be passing by near me.

    Back to the approach. I used the same opener as before except changed the compliment to be about the way she carried herself showing confidence. Reaction wasn't as good this time, she just laughed and said thanks but she was in a hurry. She actually gave a little knowing smile while I was half way through the opener, as if she knew where the conversation was heading which I found slightly unnerving for some reason. Anyway, no big deal, another approach down.

    I spotted her walking towards me from a distance so I felt a bit weird trying to look casual while I walked towards and then past her, rather than looking like I was planning to pounce on her as soon as she'd gone past. Probably didn't do a great job, something else that'll come with practice I suppose.

    On the way back to work I spotted an absolute knock out staring into a shop window looking bored, the perfect set, but I was late for getting back to work and didn't open. Stupid, stupid, stupid. It would have only taken about 30 seconds.

    Hung over today from works Christmas night out last night, so no day approaches today. Will hit the mall tomorrow though.

  8. #18

    I think u may be worrying too much about whether she is single or not..just practise engaging her and if shes with a bf or husband chat him up too, ive met some of my closests friends when i was gaming their girl and usually before u start to kino or get sexual u will become aware if she has somone or not, it also helps to build ur social circle and a lot of times she will have single friends so I would reccomend not just gaming but have a good time meeting people

  9. #19

    Another late one with pretty much no sleep last night. Didn't see much point in going to the mall since I felt like crap but dragged myself down for an hour anyway. The idea was to try a direct approach looking hung over, just to see if the reaction was different in any way. The mall was absolutely crazy, packed to bursting with Christmas shoppers. Atmosphere was pretty tense with it being so crowded and it was a bit of a battle to get between the shops. Combined with my head not really being in it, I ended up with no approach (although I did get a new backpack which was on sale). Didn't feel as bad as normal for not opening since I was so tired, at least I got myself out of the house and had a go. Back at work tomorrow, so lunchtime will be my practice window.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Gender:
    Location
    a small town in New Jersey. vist NYC regularlly
    Age
    31
    Posts
    335

    Reaction wasn't as good this time, she just laughed and said thanks but she was in a hurry. She actually gave a little knowing smile while I was half way through the opener, as if she knew where the conversation was heading which I found slightly unnerving for some reason
    this is a classic IOI buddy.

    you should understand that NO woman wakes up and says to her self in the mirror everyday
    "man, i hope i don't meet a high-value guy to sweep me off my feet today"
    that being said, you should understand that these woman WANT you to approach them. doing it directly fits the model of the above quote almost spontaneously which is very romantic to her.

    Understand that woman are always going to be more socially intuitive than men. that being said, it may feel weird to you to approach (for one particular reason ill explain below.) but to her this is serendipitous. it feels great for her to meet a guy who is honest, passionate, genuine, and is not a threat to her.

    so why do you feel a little weird when it comes to approaching? we know about AA and its hard-wiring. but one really big reason why this can feel so hard for you than it would for someone her in the forum is because we have more expirence conversation in "sets" which is a group of people. woman do too, but they begin their sets when they are children, which explains their high social intuition.

    so all you are doing by approaching is catching up to where the high school jocks are.

    realize this is a numbers game Fiji.

    what i mean is before i go out, i understand i will NOT be able to pick up Every woman I open and so i do expect rejection when I go out. realize you will probably have to open 10 sets to get about 7 phone numbers. out of those 7 phone numbers you will probably have 5 dates with those woman. and out of those 5 dates with those woman you are likely to have sex with 1 or 2 of them on the first date and very likely to have sex with another 1 or2 out of the 5 on the second or third date. (FYI- this is how you gain genuine Pre-Selection .)

    the more number of women you approach the high the number of woman your likely to have sex with also grows.

    this is why rejection should be embraced rather than feared, the more approaches a PUA does the more rejections AND phone numbers a PUA gets.

    the WORST thing you can do is Eject from the set because you feel as tho the girls are not getting attracted to you. As this not only makes possibility to have sex with the girl you are meeting, an absolute 0%. but it also peels away the thick skin of not taking rejection personally that you need as a PUA, along with a bunch of other things.

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