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crypticfox
04-27-2006, 08:19 PM
Holy christ... I'm becoming a Neg Ninja...and not in a good way.
I was talking to a female friend today and realize I had dropped her self-esteem right out from under her. I had to compliment her a few times to recover her... not really gaming her or anything, I just felt bad.
Man, you really have to watch these things. Once you get a rhythm going, it can be difficult to not go overboard. I'm kind of a smart-ass anyway, and negs seem to flow out of me like water.
Anybody else had any problems with this? How do you shut them off?

doc
04-27-2006, 08:26 PM
Yes, be careful Grasshopper of the Neg-force.
Over used and you will be a bummer to be around....

Dashing
04-27-2006, 08:28 PM
Negs
Well, when ever you learn something new it changes who you are. When you nlearn a new neg or storie that becomes a part of your game and as such who you are.
In order to turn these negs off you would have to cut back useing them on everyone even new hbs that you will meet in the future.
Ask your self one question, do I value the Game or Women or can I find a middle ground.
i. The Game, this will get you laid over and over also enhance your MLTR.
ii. Women, You will have many friendships and you sex life will stay in the married zone or...the friendship zone forever.
iii. Middle, You will get laid, just not as often. Since you cut back on negs your average hb has gone down to 8.0 and you may want to have a girl friend or two.

alex_
04-27-2006, 08:29 PM
yeah, I did this too, lost a good chick friend. :(
was a dumbarse tho

BonVoyage
04-28-2006, 06:56 PM
Anybody else had any problems with this?
Yeah thats a good question. Ive got the same problem. when I´m in the right mood, everytime a neg will be flown out of my mouth. for me its totally funny to neg girls especially SHB. but often I realize to late that I had overdo the game. I want to cancel my negs, but I dont know how?
how can I win her over without looking needy?
and what do you do if the target negs you, too? thats an IOI OK. but I don´t want to start a battle between me and the target who is greatest asshole in this club. i think neg back is not the best idea?

BonVoyage
04-28-2006, 06:57 PM
sorry. double post

doc
04-28-2006, 07:42 PM
remember..
a Neg is to dis-arm someone...not an insult. so there should be no back and forth vollies...say it when they least expect it...timing is everyting.

Malibu
04-28-2006, 07:46 PM
Being a smart ass has nothing to do with negging...being a smart ass means your taking the piss out of someone...its joking around...thats not a neg...a negs purpose is to dis arm as doc has said. A joke's purpose is to be funny. Negs arent necessarily funny. Dont get confused. Focus yourself on what a neg is supposed to do. Use your smart ass nature to be cocky funny and thats it.

Scooby
04-28-2006, 09:09 PM
Yeah read up on negs.
Another idea you might like to consider in your case (where they are out of control) is to focus on the type of neg where its mixed in with an intial compliment - this may get you to focus away from the insult side of things. e.g. "geez, thats a nice bag, my grandma has one just like it!". and youre not waiting for a reaction.

BonVoyage
04-29-2006, 04:09 AM
remember..
a Neg is to dis-arm someone...not an insult.
ok thats right. i love to tease hb but I must slow this down.
but although it comes very often that a girl negs me back. or that shes so sensitive that she cant handle with my neg. what could I do in this situation?
is the best way to ignore this, and go on with DHV?

Vincent Chase
04-29-2006, 09:16 AM
There's some comprehensive guide featuring some great PUAs/aPUAs out there somewhere... hmmm, I think it's found... IN MY SIG!
Read that. Before I understood Neg theory completely I was just a total Jackass, which was fun for me but not a whole lot of shiggles for the rest of the world.
Once you understand it, it will help.
Next, you have to make an attempt to conciously tone down what you're doing. Make it a point to try gaming without using ANY negs.
Do not label being a smart-ass with over-negging. If you make a comment out of spite, "Shit, couldn't find a shirt that fit? Maybe you shouldn't shop at the 'Baby Gap' anymore." that's being a jackass, saying a comment in retailaiton: "How do you drive a beast like this?" "Well, usually I open the door, hop in, turn the key, and step on the gas. This cool little thing here let's me control the tires, it's called a steering wheel. It's pretty intuitive." That's being a smart-ass. Over Negging is using specifically usuing negs,not something that just happened, something you utterly intended, over-negging is mis-gauging a womans threshold and using negs to apoint of no-return of sufficently damaging.
Cheers.

crypticfox
05-01-2006, 06:09 AM
Thanks VC!
I read the Neg thread in your sig... good stuff. I think I have a better understanding now. I think what I'm doing is more playfully teasing them for being lower value than myself. I'm not sure where this fits int he whole scheme of things, but I think perhaps I'm skipping A2 and jumping right into making them qualify themselves to me (A3)...?
An example would be this girl that came up to the DJ booth (where I work) Saturday night. She was probably a 9... definately pretty fly. She was wearing these shorts... oh man they were short. She was like "Blah blah can you play my song blah" To which I responded... "ya know, you walk up here trying to spit your game at me... but it takes more than a pair of painted on shorts to impress me"
Oddly enough, I ended up kiss closing her, but regardless I think I've been doing this with most girls, skipping A2 altogether, or at least barreling through it in a matter of seconds.

HungLikeASeaHorse
05-01-2006, 06:31 AM
overnegging is something i have done naturally in humour for a long time (simply because my sense of humour gravitates towards a type of teasing that is precisely how youd neg someone anyway) and from my personal experience, if you have a tendency to overneg, up the humour aspect of your negs and/or compliment the girl. it ties into push/pull theory.

Big_G
05-01-2006, 07:40 AM
Yeah, I've had similar issues with needing to calibrate my negs. I started a thread about what happened to me, http://www.theattractionforums.com/forum/showthread.php?p=71210#post71210
Check it out if u want.

Sovereign
05-01-2006, 11:05 AM
Over-using negs and over-doing c/f just turns you into an ass. Realize that negs are a PART of a process, it is used specifically to reach a goal and it should be used only in specific circumstances and at certain times. When you are negging ask yourself what the goal is? If you are doing it because he value is a bit too high, and you need to take it down a notch than fine. If you just started A2 and she is an 8 or higher, again...good. If it is just rolling off your tounge then there is no reason for it.
And Doc is right, A NEG IS NOT AN INSULT....it is a qualified compliment.