PDA

View Full Version : Surrounded By Girls At My Job, Could Use Advice!!



Solidscore
04-13-2006, 10:35 PM
Alright, so here's the situation. Any of you ever heard of the store Forever 21? That's where I work? Why, you may ask, would a guy want to work at a women's clothing store? Well, I'll fill in. I'm 19, and really am great looking(i'm getting into modeling right now) and let me tell all of you who don't think you're worthy cuz of looks....you're right. JOKING!!!!!! To be honest looks don't matter for shit, period. They get a first glance and that's it. After that it's all you. And I didn't even get good looking til high school, and by then I had a whole list of issues to deal with to become the best me.
So, in this endeavor I realized that my main sticking points are states of mind, self-confidence as far as believing I'll be funny or witty or engaging or whatever, and really just dialing into a girl's attraction. So I decided to throw myself into the feminine atmosphere by getting a job(where I would not be able to say to myself "ahh shit, i don't feel like it today"), at an all girl-staffed store. Hence this job, Forever 21. It's an all girl store that limits the sizes it will sell i.e. mostly hot girl customers, and is staffed by mostly hot girls with only four other guys, and we never work together. So, I work with hot girls all day long now. My hopes on in this mission of fashion are to get comfortable and even more so, confident, around extremely gorgeous girls. Already I've noticed girls starting to check me out, and I know my co workers are attracted to my body language from 101's like 'Oh i bet you have a girlfriend" or whatever, but that's all BEFORE I open my mouth.
My areas where I need to improve:
When talking with girls I get intimidated. This is with other people too, but girls are able to naturally just vibe so well off of eachother and are able to dial into emotional jokes and insight so well. How can I do this as well and joke about it?(for instance one girl keeps flirting with me but also is trying to joke with me about being nervous while she trains me cuz I'll forget about things sometimes, because it's like my first time doing it. What to do with this?)
Getting them attracted, and knowing how to deal with these girls.
Not getting intimidated being the only guy.
Plus, I'm white, the store is staffed by mostly people from different ethnicities than myself. This, to me, is hot. But how can you come off powerful, fun, and engaging to girls from different cultures, ESPECIALLY BLACK GIRLS!! Yeah, I have a thing for them.
Alrighty, I know this is a big post and I hope I put it in the right area. Really, any help would be sooooo appreciated on anything I put in here and thanks for reading this post. Will keep updated if anyone is interested.
Solidscore

Double Down
04-14-2006, 12:12 AM
i wrote a lengthy reply to this but for some reason it wouldn't show up...the gist of what i originally wrote...don't post in 30+ if you're 19 and don't sarge at work. gaming coworkers spells disaster and gaming customers is unprofessional. but from my experience in retail from years ago (when i was a huge AFC) is this: if you approach women as customers and not as targets you will start to become congruent with the body language of someone who is not trying to get laid. use the workplace as a tutorial in body language. approach women to sell them things and nothing more, and eventually you will internalize that relaxed, "not trying to get laid" body language which you can then transfer to the field. don't get me wrong, you can practice MM at work, but use it within the framework of selling more product and not with the goal of timebridging or # closing customers and coworkers. yes, its a lot harder to get a woman to put out than it is for her to buy stuff from you, but there is still a level of defense that goes up when an employee approaches a customer with the intent to sell crap to them that they don't need. MM demonstrates how to get around defenses, so just transfer those skills to salemanship and you will make more money, avoid the trouble from gaming coworkers, and practice your MM tactics!