View Full Version : REVIEW: One-itis, scarcity mentality, and outcome orientation.

04-2006-13, 06:28 PM
Your one-itis is unique, just like everybody else's.
My first girlfriend once told me that love is seeing an imperfect person perfectly. I now think it really applies to one-itis. As Manipulator (http://www.theattractionforums.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5087) says, you begin to form this image of the girl that becomes twisted and completely unrealistic, and you start chasing this image because it becomes extraordinarily valuable to you. His advice is to start viewing her as a HUMAN rather than an unattainable GODDESS. She has faults and quirks. Stop seeing her perfectly.
To tell the truth, we do help everybody who gets moved to the Worst-Of for one-itis. We link them to relevant articles. We apply our "tough love" depending on the severity of the case. Most of these guys have been youngsters... those hormones really strike hard. They're usually stubborn about their situation... But this one's DIFFERENT!!!! She's SPECIAL!!! So we have to REALLY kick their ass into gear and show them how to straighten up and fly right. Why should one specific girl warrant your attention any more than the next, when there are more than three billion females existing on the planet?
But that isn't to say that one-itis only hits youths. Emotions are universal. And thus, I speak to you regardless of your age. I was a martial arts instructor for many years, teaching students of ALL ages. Even though my style of teaching differed between assisting a 5-year-old from a 50-year-old, the same underlying principles applied.
No matter how you slice the situation, panicked requests for help display scarcity mentality which is basically just one-itis. Just by the way these guys post, I can tell they're pretty focused on getting this one specific girl, even though they may be currently gaming other girls. That's not the most beneficial mindset to be in. Why? Because they're placing WAAAAY too much importance on it turning out "just right", which cultivates nervous energies and places a lot of unnecessary pressure on themselves. They may not know they're putting out these vibes, but women are extremely receptive to it and can smell it.
These guys are focused on the outcome. As the Venusian Arts Handbook (http://www.theattractionforums.com/MM-Products.aspx?action=goto&catid=2) describes, there is a certain Zen to the Mystery Method. He who releases all expection of outcome often is the one who ironically finds himself basking in it. So don't be afraid of fucking it up, because worrying about fucking up gives you a HIGHER CHANCE of failure. Let go and enjoy the process.
My first girlfriend also once told me that everything happens for a reason. If it works out with a girl, great. If not, you learned something from the process. Become process oriented, like hunting or fishing, and enjoy it. Remember, it's just practice because there are other women, BETTER QUALITY WOMEN WAITING for a chance to be with you. You are the prize, are you not?
We teach men how to avoid and crush feelings of one-itis for their benefit. One-itis really IS a disease. It is a cancer. It is an ailment. It is an illness. But it can be cured. There are many relevant articles in the Best Of The Forum (http://www.theattractionforums.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=73) for dealing with it. We usually do the hard-and-fast method of "tough love" (as seen in the Worst Of The Forum (http://www.theattractionforums.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=75)) for stubborn [often young] sufferers, but I took the time to explain here on a more advanced level since I usually can't afford to spend much time dealing with these regular occurrances. I figured everyone got the picture.
Keep in mind that this forum isn't a place for guys to post panicked requests for help with a certain situation. We will not take your hand and guide you through the steps one-by-one. We are long-term process oriented, gradually building a solid skillset so that we may succeed with all types of women that we desire. If you're asking what you need to do next with a girl, there's a very good chance that you've probably already messed up in a previous stage and the situation may be unsalvageable by the time you log on and post a help request. Even if your circumstance sounds unique, don't worry... it isn't. I've dealt with dozens of cases already and they all boil down to the same elements. Remember... Your one-itis is unique, just like everybody else's.