View Full Version : having a good memory......good thing or bad thing???

04-2006-11, 12:12 PM
i don't know if anyone else has this same problem, but I have a remarkable memory. i remember almost every single person I've talked to and what i talked to them about. I even remember more if they even hint at something that we had a conversation about. I'm kind of starting to consider this to be a double edged sword because in reading TD's "25 things not to do" he mentions not paying such close attention to what the target is saying. I find myself constantly asking girls about something they told me about themselves. For instance if a girl I was talking to in a club one night tells me she has a test the next day or an important meeting, I ask them about it the next time I see them. Is that AFC behavior?

04-2006-11, 12:17 PM
It's a differnece between trying to sound like you care (validaion seaking/AFC bevahior)
And really caring.
Also - if she wants you to care about her or not.
I often remember little things about people: What they said/where we were/what they were wearing. And bring these up later.
This can be a powerful tool to rehash emotions:
Casually mentioning that the last time you saw her wear that was when you went to ____ and did ____ months ago can put her back into that good frame and enhance it within her as 'awwww. He really cares!'
If you're constantly correcting people and flaunting their inability to remember - stop that right now. You're not winning friends by proving that you're smarter than anyone.