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pfb03
05-05-2008, 05:28 AM
I somtimes get that qualification feeling when I'm being asked questions, and realised that questions are a form of compliance, and that by answering a persons question, you are complying to their frame. That lowers your value compared to theirs.

I realise that somtimes questions are genuinely a way of gaining rapport and of a person genuinely expressing interest in you or what you have to say, but ofter, questions are a form of compliance testing and fit into the other persons frame of them being the qualifier, and you being qualified.

So not answering questions and turning questions around on a person is you maintaining your own frame of being the qualifier/screener, and the other person being qualified/screened. Thus successfuly maintaing a valuable frame and passing a shit test.

Any thoughts are welcomed. Only took me a couple of years to Really get that. Locked in! :cool:

Paladin
05-05-2008, 06:04 PM
Are you saying that you are against answering questions or in favor of it? I definitely think it's important to screen both ways. If a girl answers a question, then I answer one. Especially in comfort.

pfb03
05-06-2008, 01:50 AM
Yeah, deffinately agree with you there. In comfort when a girl is genuinely asking you questions to try and gain rapport, I'm all for answering questions, but it's when a girl or an AMOG asks you questions and it just feels wrong, like your just loosing value by answering them.

It's like they're seeing whether or not you have any self-esteem or confidence by seeing whether you will jump through the hoop of answering their question or not, and if you do, then your value just plummets. I just realised it t'ohther day, and it's like I knew you should'nt answer questions, but now I get it, I feel like you must not answer questions or you'll hit a dead end and be stoped from advancing...at least in the attract phase.

Really I just realised that these questions are a form of shit test (from AMOGs too, cos an AMOG is really just one giant shit test) and that by answering them like you would in comfort, you fail.

So really I realised:

Attraction - no direct answers, instead, C&F, Ignore. (Any other suggestions)
Comfort - answer questions (any suggestions?) Maybe be ambiguous, leave open loops for a couple.



Reason I posted this really is within a social circle, I am often tested with these questions, like I'm being challenged. It's almost like within the circle one will ask a question with the context 'jump through my hoop, go on, jump through because I asked you'. But I was oblivious to it because I was'nt un game mode with these people, but ithe understanding more rooted in me now, so it's not a prob.

Cheeres.

_8_
05-06-2008, 02:53 AM
Right on bro. It's cool when you come to new insights, isn't it? It's like higher levels of the game get "unlocked", and you "power up".

A formula I like to follow is to either play/joke around with a question (make fun of it, or give a ridiculous answer)..

or

IOD, which is something you already mentioned (ignoring the question by posing your own, or saying something unrelated).

The point is to show that my value is higher and thus, a straight answer from me needs to be earned.

Exactly like you said.

EDIT: Just make sure that you avoid qualifying yourself by showing EFFORT in your avoidance tactics. Because effort implies interest, even if that's not your intention. Be smoooooth and effortless.