View Full Version : I have an AFC acquaintance who could use some help..

02-29-2008, 06:34 PM
**Warning, this post is long**

I know this guy who seems on the surface pretty chill, I only really see him at the gym although he does hang out with a few people in my social circle who I donít particularly like.

This guy is a gym junkie, as it is his only point of self esteem. He has no confidence when it comes to woman, and literally everything that comes out of his mouth DLVís him and makes him seem like an AFC.

I think he could really benefit from some inner game training, maybe some meditations like hypnotics stuff. Then move on to reading some of savoys stuff and such.

He tells me he has a stuttering problem, however I have never heared him stutter, he is a decent looking guy.

Iíd like to introduce him to the PUA community, show him it exists.

Here is the problem.

None of my friends know that I have been working on my game, and theirs good reason for this. My circle of friends are basically the Persian community, and for anyone who knows this community, they have a tendency to have a lot of shady people, and its really hard to trust anybody. On the plus side we go out a lot and have fun, but its not ever a close~ trusting relationship.

Itís a small community, and word would get around generally fast, every one knows everyone type of thing among the Persians.

I donít date within my social circle~ at all, I try to avoid it at all costs, its just got too many strings attached.

The guys who he is friends with are not people I like, as they are pretty much prime examples of people who smile and kiss your ass, only to turn around a moment later and talk badly about you.

He seems like a nice guy himself, but I just donít know him well enough to trust him. Quite frankly, I feel bad for him, and I know what its like to be in his position. Heís not alone and shouldnít really feel like he is.

I see myself with three options really.

1. kind of mentor him as if I donít know about a large community such as this one, act as if everything I tell him is from personal experience. Give him little tasks to do to help build his confidence/ inner game at first. Whatís making me not want to do this is that I would be lying and taking credit for things that I donít have any right to be taking credit for.

2. I could risk telling him about this community, and simply hope he does not spoil things for me and let the word spread.

3. I could simply turn my cheek, and forget about him and worry about my own life.

A little bit about me, I am new to this community, and Iím still working on my game. I have always been a bit chubby but have recently started working out a lot, and have been getting positive results without me even going out of my way, which has helped my inner game a lot. My best friends who are in my social circle are not trustworthy, even though I have known one of them for half our lives, he is an AFC who disrespects his friends and trys to make himself look cooler then his friends and ditches them.

Since my game is not 100% solid, I donít want to risk lowering my status at all within my social circle, even if Iím not dating within it, I may bring girls to their parties and such.

So any input on what I should do about this guy would be appreciated, I know this is a long post but their was a lot I felt needed to be taken into consideration.

Just a side note
If anyone has any recommended readings or threads on how to change your social circle, get a new group of close reliable friends please let me know. Within my circle, my best friends are ďreveredĒ by others, so I get status simply by association but it does not feel natural and I donít ever feel comfortable around these people.

Thanks for any feedback

02-29-2008, 07:28 PM
just do #1 i mean this is meant to help ppl and he needs help with approach anxiety i would say so just mentor him untill the he gets good than he'll start to get better at it by him self. we have to many ppl in the comunity as it is and i really dont think we need more. am in the same situation with my friends and i dont think anyone would be mad if you take credit for someone's advice as long as you use it to help someone in need.