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Cajun
01-10-2008, 01:04 PM
Hey guys, I promised myself I would commit to updating my blog regularly in the new year so here is my first article. You can find the complete article on my blog (at least part 1) and parts 2 and 3 will be added shortly, or I might save them solely for students and those of you that will be attending the superconference where I will be speaking about body language, I haven't decided yet. Either way, this ones free, enjoy.

http://cajunsspice.blogspot.com/

Advanced Body Language


Whenever students ask me how I learned to attract women with such ease I always say the same thing: Body language. I then recite a quote, something that was told to me a long time ago:

“Everything you’ll ever need to learn about women, you can learn from Rock n roll.”

A very wise man once told me this and I’m sure most of my students are just as confused as I was when I first heard it, but now several years (and many women) later I can whole-heartedly agree, it’s absolutely true.

One of the by-products of committing yourself to the study of attraction and how it works is that you start noticing things that you never noticed before. A lot of us instructors refer to this as “seeing the matrix” and it basically amounts to identifying and understanding the cause and effect of the most subtle communications; body language. It becomes somewhat of a sixth sense and it’s exceptionally difficult to turn off, especially if you’re at all an analytical person (and let’s face it, you kind of have to be if you want to get good at this stuff) This is why us instructors are so proficient at breaking down what students did right or wrong in a set simply by casually observing them. We can see the matrix.

I realized a long time ago that the secret to attraction isn’t in what you say, it’s in how you carry yourself; your presence, something controlled almost entirely by your body language. I knew that if I was to master the art of attraction, I would need to master the art of body language. Remembering the words of wisdom I had been told all those years ago, I turned to rock n roll.

I began sifting through literally hundreds of videos documenting performances of the most prolific and sexually charged rock icons in music history. I used my “sixth sense” to meticulously analyze every thing they did. I studied how they walked, how they danced, their facial expressions, even how they stood still! I started to notice a pattern, there were three qualities that nearly every sex symbol in the history of rock n roll all had in common, and it had nothing to do with their music or looks.

The first quality I recognized was immediate; sexual presence. Most of the musicians elicited this through their dancing, which wasn’t that useful since I obviously couldn’t be dancing all the time. The absolute best example of sexual presence I could find was Jim Morrison simply because he elicited tremendous sexual presence by doing very little. I hadn’t watched any videos of him performing since I was a teenager and seeing it again with my “sixth sense” absolutely blew my mind. He moved slowly, purposefully, as if to poeticize his presence. Everything seemed so calculated. After referencing what he did with a number of other sexual icons, I quickly made a list:

Advanced body language – Sexual Presence

1. Less is more.

- Move only when you need to, and react with delay.

- Slow down your movements, as if moving underwater.

- Movement should be bold, sporadic and purposeful.


2. Poeticize your presence.

- Absolutely believe that you are a spectacle to be witnessed.

- Draw attention to your every move with strong eye contact, and delayed responses.

- Always appear physically more comfortable than anyone else in the group. Lean back when standing, angle back and drape your arms when sitting.

- Your demeanor should be carefree, content; you do not want or need anything.


3. Emphasize your sexuality

- Relax your eyes. Look at Jim Morrison, Phil Lynott or even Marilyn Monroe, their eyes all carry the same look, model it.

- Slightly Purse your lips, as if you’re about to kiss them.

- Slightly tilt your head up and look down when speaking.

- Slowly study women’s faces during interaction, glance at lips periodically.

- Keep an inquisitory look of mild arousal on your face.


I began modeling my body language based on this list and the results were epic. This is the reason I stopped using routines, I no longer needed them. Everything they communicated I could now communicate with my body. Even openers started to become unnecessary as women were now opening ME more than ever, based simply on the way I stood and the look on my face. Attraction went from slowly earned to instantaneous, but there were still some gaps…

The hottest women, although attracted, would still shit test me. Not only that, but AMOGs started to become more of a problem as I was now getting a tremendous amount of female attention. This is where the second quality I found amongst sexual rock icons came in handy, and allowed me to smoothly and effortlessly diffuse any shit test or amog attempt that was thrown at me…

Stay tuned for part 2 of the article where I go over the second quality: Restraint.

http://cajunsspice.blogspot.com/

Maje
01-10-2008, 02:23 PM
Wow.

Savoy
01-10-2008, 02:28 PM
Cajun are you going to be teaching any of the Body Language exercises at the Superconference?

Cajun
01-10-2008, 02:32 PM
Cajun are you going to be teaching any of the Body Language exercises at the Superconference?

I was going to speak about body language, but yeah I can do the exercises as well for sure.

Bloodflowers
01-10-2008, 02:39 PM
good post! backed up what i already know but now i feel more confident doing it!

Germ
01-10-2008, 03:26 PM
Good shit. I modeled mine after Charlie Sheen hahaha. Same thing.

silverghost
01-10-2008, 10:39 PM
Kudos man. It goes a long way back when i learned these stuff but now i do em without even knowing i do em. I have women walking up at me instead of me going on em, they try to pick me up or they comment when i pass next to em with positive comments. And the funny thing? I am average looking :p

SlowMotion
01-10-2008, 11:18 PM
Good post. One thing I'd be interested to hear more on is why this body language is adopted by the guys we would consider to be naturals and why it works so well on women. For example, Jim Morrison probably didn't learn his body language from book, it probably just came naturally to him. (of course, I could be wrong, but I've known other people for whom this was true. they just seemed to have natural charisma and it certainly didn't seem labored or deliberate). So what are the underlying beliefs that belie these body language traits? And what do these traits indicate to women that is so powerful and attractive?

True Pimp
01-11-2008, 02:44 AM
This deserves to be in the library of Classic Writings imo :)

Colour
01-11-2008, 06:49 AM
Great post Cajun. Very useful pointers ;)

The_Jedi
01-11-2008, 10:48 AM
Magnificent post on the nuances of body language, Cajun. Kudos, indeed. I'm not attending the superconference, so I hope you do decide to post the other parts. I'd be very interested in reading them, as well.

Cajun
01-12-2008, 12:52 AM
Good post. One thing I'd be interested to hear more on is why this body language is adopted by the guys we would consider to be naturals and why it works so well on women. For example, Jim Morrison probably didn't learn his body language from book, it probably just came naturally to him. (of course, I could be wrong, but I've known other people for whom this was true. they just seemed to have natural charisma and it certainly didn't seem labored or deliberate). So what are the underlying beliefs that belie these body language traits? And what do these traits indicate to women that is so powerful and attractive?

Great question!

Actually, you'd be surprised. Almost all of the most sexual icons had to learn their body language and practiced all the time. Jim Morrison was actually incredibly shy and spent most of his earlier performances with his back to the audience. Eventually he modeled a "stance" that was based on statues of greek gods and heroes. Marilyn Monroe would spend hours in front of the mirror practicing her "look" and how to walk.

The point here is that even with people who appear to be "naturals" its almost always a learned behavior. At some point in their life they received positive reinforcement from standing, moving or looking a certain way and then decided to keep doing it.

SlowMotion
01-12-2008, 09:58 AM
How do you practice moving more slowly and making your actions deliberate? It seems like meditation or martial arts might help with something like this - a lot of people I know who do that have more of a calm and controlled vibe.

Comet06
01-12-2008, 10:25 AM
Is there any other way master body language, such as reading an ebook?

How long did it take you to master body language?

Thanks!

jbrett
01-12-2008, 10:43 AM
to build on Cajuns response (which I thought was awesome), you would not fucking believe how much time women spend on their body language. so many girls make their little poses for the camera. the KNOW they look FUCKING GOOD IN THAT POSE!

Have people take a lot of pictures of you. Take a lot of pictures of yourself. Record yourself on video. When youre walking on the street watch your reflection in the store windows. but before all this decide what you WANT to look like first.

Trane84
01-16-2008, 12:52 PM
Great question!

Actually, you'd be surprised. Almost all of the most sexual icons had to learn their body language and practiced all the time. Jim Morrison was actually incredibly shy and spent most of his earlier performances with his back to the audience. Eventually he modeled a "stance" that was based on statues of greek gods and heroes. Marilyn Monroe would spend hours in front of the mirror practicing her "look" and how to walk.

The point here is that even with people who appear to be "naturals" its almost always a learned behavior. At some point in their life they received positive reinforcement from standing, moving or looking a certain way and then decided to keep doing it.

I just read that David Beckham is getting body language help from Tom Cruise! So he is definitely learning the behaviorisms and modeling himself after someone he thinks has good body language

http://www.freshnews.in/tom-cruise-helps-david-beckham-as-a-new-body-language-coach-14045

.

Domeremy
01-17-2008, 08:13 PM
Hey guys, I promised myself I would commit to updating my blog regularly in the new year so here is my first article. You can find the complete article on my blog (at least part 1) and parts 2 and 3 will be added shortly, or I might save them solely for students and those of you that will be attending the superconference where I will be speaking about body language, I haven't decided yet. Either way, this ones free, enjoy.

http://cajunsspice.blogspot.com/

Advanced Body Language


Whenever students ask me how I learned to attract women with such ease I always say the same thing: Body language. I then recite a quote, something that was told to me a long time ago:

“Everything you’ll ever need to learn about women, you can learn from Rock n roll.”

A very wise man once told me this and I’m sure most of my students are just as confused as I was when I first heard it, but now several years (and many women) later I can whole-heartedly agree, it’s absolutely true.

One of the by-products of committing yourself to the study of attraction and how it works is that you start noticing things that you never noticed before. A lot of us instructors refer to this as “seeing the matrix” and it basically amounts to identifying and understanding the cause and effect of the most subtle communications; body language. It becomes somewhat of a sixth sense and it’s exceptionally difficult to turn off, especially if you’re at all an analytical person (and let’s face it, you kind of have to be if you want to get good at this stuff) This is why us instructors are so proficient at breaking down what students did right or wrong in a set simply by casually observing them. We can see the matrix.

I realized a long time ago that the secret to attraction isn’t in what you say, it’s in how you carry yourself; your presence, something controlled almost entirely by your body language. I knew that if I was to master the art of attraction, I would need to master the art of body language. Remembering the words of wisdom I had been told all those years ago, I turned to rock n roll.

I began sifting through literally hundreds of videos documenting performances of the most prolific and sexually charged rock icons in music history. I used my “sixth sense” to meticulously analyze every thing they did. I studied how they walked, how they danced, their facial expressions, even how they stood still! I started to notice a pattern, there were three qualities that nearly every sex symbol in the history of rock n roll all had in common, and it had nothing to do with their music or looks.

The first quality I recognized was immediate; sexual presence. Most of the musicians elicited this through their dancing, which wasn’t that useful since I obviously couldn’t be dancing all the time. The absolute best example of sexual presence I could find was Jim Morrison simply because he elicited tremendous sexual presence by doing very little. I hadn’t watched any videos of him performing since I was a teenager and seeing it again with my “sixth sense” absolutely blew my mind. He moved slowly, purposefully, as if to poeticize his presence. Everything seemed so calculated. After referencing what he did with a number of other sexual icons, I quickly made a list:

Advanced body language – Sexual Presence

1. Less is more.

- Move only when you need to, and react with delay.

- Slow down your movements, as if moving underwater.

- Movement should be bold, sporadic and purposeful.


2. Poeticize your presence.

- Absolutely believe that you are a spectacle to be witnessed.

- Draw attention to your every move with strong eye contact, and delayed responses.

- Always appear physically more comfortable than anyone else in the group. Lean back when standing, angle back and drape your arms when sitting.

- Your demeanor should be carefree, content; you do not want or need anything.


3. Emphasize your sexuality

- Relax your eyes. Look at Jim Morrison, Phil Lynott or even Marilyn Monroe, their eyes all carry the same look, model it.

- Slightly Purse your lips, as if you’re about to kiss them.

- Slightly tilt your head up and look down when speaking.

- Slowly study women’s faces during interaction, glance at lips periodically.

- Keep an inquisitory look of mild arousal on your face.


I began modeling my body language based on this list and the results were epic. This is the reason I stopped using routines, I no longer needed them. Everything they communicated I could now communicate with my body. Even openers started to become unnecessary as women were now opening ME more than ever, based simply on the way I stood and the look on my face. Attraction went from slowly earned to instantaneous, but there were still some gaps…

The hottest women, although attracted, would still shit test me. Not only that, but AMOGs started to become more of a problem as I was now getting a tremendous amount of female attention. This is where the second quality I found amongst sexual rock icons came in handy, and allowed me to smoothly and effortlessly diffuse any shit test or amog attempt that was thrown at me…

Stay tuned for part 2 of the article where I go over the second quality: Restraint.

http://cajunsspice.blogspot.com/
I have serious problems with that statement. I learned a long time ago what you say is just as important as how you say it (or how you carry yourself).

Cajun
01-18-2008, 03:12 PM
I have serious problems with that statement. I learned a long time ago what you say is just as important as how you say it (or how you carry yourself).

Nope, and I prove it all the time. I have opened sets with things like "Do you guys like pickles? They're crunchy and delicious" I even talked to a set for over 20 mins about how im a serial killer and they still wanted to go home with me.

Think about it, it doesnt matter if you have the best pick-up line in the world, unless you know how to deliver it properly, it will always fail. Likewise, if you know how to deliver a line with the proper tone and body language, it doesnt matter what you say, it will always work.

Now this isnt to say that what you're saying is useless, its not.

I'm Canadian so I'll use a hockey analogy;

When im solely relying on my BL and tone to create attraction (no verbal), it's like playing without skates. I'm at a disadvantage, but if you're really good it's not hard to score. If you're relying solely on your verbal it's like playing without a stick...and you have down's syndrome. Sure you may randomly kick the puck every once in a while, but you're pretty much fucked.

DSLupus
01-18-2008, 03:38 PM
When im solely relying on my BL and tone to create attraction (no verbal), it's like playing without skates. I'm at a disadvantage, but if you're really good it's not hard to score. If you're relying solely on your verbal it's like playing without a stick...and you have down's syndrome. Sure you may randomly kick the puck every once in a while, but you're pretty much fucked.

One of the best analogies I've ever heard.

I'd say something praising you, but I feel like I should be off practicing in front of a mirror right now. Away!

_Cane_
01-18-2008, 07:05 PM
I think your tips about BL are great. We need more stuff like this. People post a lot about how to walk or make eye contact and such but mostly it is expressed in a useless verbage.

I like how you desribe proper body language through concepts.. and self-perception. Mixed in with some actual movement tips.

When your head is in the right place, your body language often naturally follows, which free's up your conscious mind to focus on other things.

Great post.

p.s. The best examples of guys who just carry themselves so damn well are Marlon Brando and James Franco. I think Brad Pitts a great example too for alpha, but he doesn't express the same dominating level of sexuality that MB and JF do. Theres a lot you can learn about body language from watching movies and interviews with those two.

cerebrum
01-18-2008, 07:09 PM
Hi,

I don't know if I misunderstood you, but for me some of your info seems to be against the basic advice which is: be expressive in your voice, facial expressions and gestures, don't try to act cool. Smile! Am I misinterpreting you?

dimetrius
01-19-2008, 03:39 PM
good post

but there's one thing

Slowly study women’s faces during interaction, glance at lips periodically.

why glancing at lips? makes no sense to me but i'm sure you can explain it.

peace

markk
01-19-2008, 03:52 PM
Glancing at their lips sends a sublte sexual signal: lips = kiss = sexual. Remember, this is not meant to make SENSE...

Cajun
01-19-2008, 04:27 PM
Hi,

I don't know if I misunderstood you, but for me some of your info seems to be against the basic advice which is: be expressive in your voice, facial expressions and gestures, don't try to act cool. Smile! Am I misinterpreting you?

Thats why I called this post advanced body language. These are shortcuts to use once you've mastered the most basic rules. Being expressive and smiling is still important because it makes you interesting, the stuff im describing makes you attractive

It's a different style and you need a basic understanding of body language to really make use of it. Think of it as the manual transmission of pick-up styles; its much quicker and more efficient IF you know how to use it.

I'm always looking for the shortest path back to my bed.

Extranjeras
01-19-2008, 05:20 PM
I'm saving this article. And am going to study the rock stars, thanks Cajun!


to build on Cajuns response (which I thought was awesome), you would not fucking believe how much time women spend on their body language. so many girls make their little poses for the camera. the KNOW they look FUCKING GOOD IN THAT POSE!

Have people take a lot of pictures of you. Take a lot of pictures of yourself. Record yourself on video. When youre walking on the street watch your reflection in the store windows. but before all this decide what you WANT to look like first.

That is so gardarn true! :O It's funny that there are things I JUST DON'T notice and take for granted.

I got summit to add concerning body language:

I'm a martial artist, and, somehow a guy noticed it somehow in me. I was in a boutique going for my fishing license, when a dude came up to me and asked, 'Are you a body builder or a martial artist?' I was stunned, I asked how he knew. 'It's the way you move; you got confidence, strength, and you act as tho you OWN your body.'

Afterburner
01-19-2008, 05:49 PM
when will be the part 2 and 3 will be up cajun. this post was pretty sweet.

qualitystreet
01-21-2008, 11:00 AM
Body Language is the key to a lot of things.

The way to practice the low movement aspect is visualise youself being stuck in treacle and move that way. Also the posture can be helped by stading square against a wall and step forward, thats the pose you want.

I have a thing where I slap the palm of my hand with the back of the other, its more of an anchoring thing now. It is cool for me.

Has anybody any advice for getting rid of pausers from your speech, I've just got the speaking loud thing but 'umm'. 'er' and 'ar' too much. I don't know if anybody knows a way?

The Legend
01-21-2008, 11:46 AM
'Are you a body builder or a martial artist?' I was stunned, I asked how he knew. 'It's the way you move; you got confidence, strength, and you act as tho you OWN your body.'

YOU THINK?

I think he had the less often talked about specialist edition of MM for men who love men. Was he congruent with his new canned material:p

I was once opened by 2 middle aged rotters, who i had my back to all night.

they demanded to know what i did for a living? they then said i was obviously someone who was used to speaking in public and just oozed confidence. was quite funny for me as i was just having a quiet drink with a big fat friend of mine, and had no game on what so ever:rolleyes:

_Cane_
01-21-2008, 12:14 PM
I'm going out on a limb and I'm going to say that body language is an attraction switch.. literally.


You could be being watched by a girl who you haven't had eye contact with, didn't notice her, no interaction with her what so ever. And just by her observing your mannerisms, she will develope both attraction and interest in you. I think that being physically attractive and having good solid body language goes hand in hand and are not only related, but directly reliant on each other.

I think that body language is a huge part of the attraction switch pie.. and is the majority cause of congruence. We could go on an on about how important body language is and how it relates to basically everything..

..but I just wanted to state my opinion that although body language is a communication tool, I'd say its even beyond that and is an attraction switch in itself.

cerebrum
01-24-2008, 08:31 PM
Being expressive and smiling is still important because it makes you interesting, the stuff im describing makes you attractive


So even when using this advanced style you still smile and are expressive, yes?

fings
01-24-2008, 09:51 PM
i really enjoyed your insight. tell me, i'm a new member but ever since i started using tmm and other pick up styles women have a new attitude toward me. girls that were never attracted to me before coming on to me and hanging on my every word. i can't believe the difference. i don't even use lines or anything like that. i seem to have obtained an aura or something. is this an unconcious use of body language? does anyone else feel like this. what am i doing right? i feel like i wasted my youth trying to be nice guy.

Rusty_84
01-28-2008, 03:08 AM
So even when using this advanced style you still smile and are expressive, yes?

yes, cajun im confused too, can you be more precise?

Cajun
01-28-2008, 08:44 AM
yes, cajun im confused too, can you be more precise?

Yes, still smile, still be expressive, just tone it down a notch. My second article on this where I go over "restraint" covers this. It will be done by tonight.

Green Hell
01-28-2008, 08:54 AM
Sorta ot here, but one thing I noticed helps my body language a LOT is to not load up on any thing that makes you jittery. IE, stay away from sugary foods and excess caffeine.

I'm at my best after a cup of coffee, but when I have mountain dew, vault, etc... I can't have good BL no matter how hard I try, and I would normally say BL is one of my strong suits.

TigerEye
01-28-2008, 09:13 PM
Body Language is the key to a lot of things.

Has anybody any advice for getting rid of pausers from your speech, I've just got the speaking loud thing but 'umm'. 'er' and 'ar' too much. I don't know if anybody knows a way?


in my public speaking class my teacher told us to get our friends or co workers to give us some kind of visual "code" every time we do that or say "like" every other word. we tend to do those thing almost subconciously, but when we have some visual sign then we become aware of them. hope this helps

unrated
01-28-2008, 11:09 PM
in my public speaking class my teacher told us to get our friends or co workers to give us some kind of visual "code" every time we do that or say "like" every other word. we tend to do those thing almost subconciously, but when we have some visual sign then we become aware of them. hope this helps

Any other tips your public speaking teacher told you that helped you out?

Nutz
01-29-2008, 06:36 AM
Any other tips your public speaking teacher told you that helped you out?

Watch out for vocal pauses such as "um" "like" "uh" etc. And I absolutely hate it when someone is giving a presentation and they do the can-can. It's like a mini walk with leg kicks. Keep your feet planted FFS!

A college level speech class is almost requisite training when it comes to social artistry IMO. There are so many things to cover that it's not really possible to do the subject justice via posting on a forum.

gottasrt4
03-05-2008, 02:30 PM
this's an AWESOME post - read'n part 2 in a min, but thought I'd drop a Q as well.

I've read 2 books on body language and am stunned at what I'm see'n now - like someone else put it, I see the damn maTRiX!!! LoL, anyway, got this coworker that I think's kinda attracted to me and I've noticed a subtle body language that I can't put my finger on: she almost always wears a skirt and she's always wiping off her skirt right over her shit like she's wipe'n someth'n off.....now of course, my eyes follow movement and have yet to see any crumbs or anything else for that matter fly to the floor. Ya'll think that's just another form of primping (which she commonly does), or is that a way of diverting attention down there??

buy'n that book, The Definitive Book on Body Language next check, too!!

fings
03-05-2008, 08:17 PM
i know this move first hand. it means she's a freak. better watch out "sex addict".