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Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 05:48 AM
I am looking for advice feedback and critique of my interaction with my ex. Its kinda long but anyone who feels they have a little time and something to offer... please do.
Ok so my ex started emailing me and validating herself to me and trying to check up on how I am doing. I am not interested in being serious with her anymore and am interested in dating lots of women in an effort to someday find the one that is best for me. However...I figured its was good chance to practice my up and coming skills and also maybe land myself something to revisit from time to time if ya know what I mean.
I mostly was just playful and teased and used push/pull. She said she thought since we were together so long that we could still talk and be friends. I told her that I think that might be ok with me as long as she keeps her hands to herself. (push) I also told her that now she has my mind on her again and that if I end up running into her I will have to spank her ass. Telling her that she should take it easy on the eggnog ect. This was the nature of our conversation. Mostly it was her being serious and me being playful. After a little back and forth she got a bit sedimental and said how no one knows her like I do. I took the bait (arrg) and wrote back that i am not sure if no one knows her like I do but i do know this.... and I wrote a bunch of things some silly and some deep that basically sent the message I know who she is and what she needs and am ok with it. I also finally wrote her a paragraph about how I am doing that just dropped some hints, mentioned that I have moved out from my other girlfriends onto the water and how I am real busy right now.
After that she stopped the emails and I had to email a second time....I said "I hope its not something I said"....that got her to write back but it was just how she doesnt have access to a computer easily and she is busy yada yada...so I replied with basically that I am busy too and hope everything works out for her thanks for the memories yada yada ((she pushed aso I pushed back)). I am wondering if I made a mistake somewhere or what I may have done wrong and what I can improve for next time and if there is anything further that I can do now. Critique me!!

Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 07:16 AM
Its ok guys....I cant figure out anything wrong either. I guess thats why they say not to even bother with ex girlfriends at all....much easier to get new fish out of the sea. No big loss....

TrueStory
12-23-2005, 07:21 AM
Have you guys heard of the phone? Call her, tell her you want to get together for a cup of coffee and talk about random bullshit that happened while you were apart. Just to catch up. Meet up with her. ....then you know what to do.

Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 07:37 AM
I didnt want to come across even close to needy and felt that would be showing too much interest on my behalf. Thanks for the advice though....maybe I will try it with a less cut throat ex sometime. This one is cut throat and tight gamed.

doc
12-23-2005, 07:50 AM
ok...since you asked.......
ex`s are too much trouble....too much history...and too many old behavoir patterns.Not a good place to practice.
they always mess me up.
It`s ok to see her...but concentrate your new game on new game.

JD_NYC
12-23-2005, 09:06 AM
You broke up with her right?
Also,
I wouldnt have emailed her the second time asking if it was somehting I said. Sounds as if you were looking for some validation.

Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 09:33 AM
You broke up with her right?
Also,
I wouldnt have emailed her the second time asking if it was somehting I said. Sounds as if you were looking for some validation.
Its complicated. I broke it off with her and then turned her down for reconsilation...but later came back to try to work it out and she turned me down. Anyways all this was a while ago before I knew what I was doing. As far as that second email thing....thats a big weakness for me. i find that a lot of times I have a hard time finding the line between too distant and hard to get or uninterested and too needy. THats something I am still tryin to find the line on cause its something that theory cant really adress. It depends on the situation, and the girl and only lots of experience can allow you to get to a place where you can feel that line out. I think your totally right though about that line....At that point I was just looking for feedback... it was a big nono for sure.

OrNaMent
12-23-2005, 09:46 AM
1-dont come across as needy in any way
2-dont call her or email her much...make her chase you
3-dont do any wussy stuff because youll screw it up
4-go date other women and make sure you communicate it to her through stories...ex: the funniest thing happened when i was out with this girl a few weeks ago
goodluck
ornament

Rodzilla
12-23-2005, 01:41 PM
You guys are missing the point here...The EX came back to you Duke3100 right? She contacted you...So she has put herself out there for you...All you have to do it scoop her up...simple...
Call her and say, "I'm going shopping for ___. You always had good sytle with those...let's meet at ____."
This is alpha behavior...now your face to face and can F close...

Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 02:52 PM
ok...since you asked.......
ex`s are too much trouble....too much history...and too many old behavoir patterns.Not a good place to practice.
they always mess me up.
It`s ok to see her...but concentrate your new game on new game.
Yea...plus she could give me oneitis again and I already know she is not right for me.

Hypnovibe
12-23-2005, 03:01 PM
You guys are missing the point here...The EX came back to you Duke3100 right? She contacted you...So she has put herself out there for you...All you have to do it scoop her up...simple...
Call her and say, "I'm going shopping for ___. You always had good sytle with those...let's meet at ____."
This is alpha behavior...now your face to face and can F close...
Now here is some great advice. This is what I should have done if I wanted to get back in....at the time though I felt it would be too needy and I wasnt sure if she was just looking for her validation and then be like haha screw you bucko....which I wouldnt put it past her. It is very possible that she was looking for me to ask her to hang out just so she could reject me...thats sooo her. Your right though the alpha mentality wouldnt give a damn either way. I was in the wrong mindframe. I had not thought of it that way so thanks for helping me to reframe that situation. If anyone else see's any flaws please point them out. I try to treat every interaction with a girl as a learning experience or a game. I find that the more different perspectives I get the better I get at reframing things in a manner that allows me to expose my situation on the fly.

JD_NYC
12-23-2005, 06:12 PM
You answered your own question. If she can give you oneitis stay away and live to fight another day.

Hypnovibe
12-26-2005, 06:39 AM
You answered your own question. If she can give you oneitis stay away and live to fight another day.
Yea...and now she has left a message on my machine!! I feel like I want to practice to see how much better I have gotten. Its sometimes hard to tell with new girls and I lived with this one so its great for sharpening my skills. I emailed her back instead of calling and told her to give me her number and maybe I would give her a call sometime. I told her she must have called because she was trying to get a chance to hear my sexy voice. I am playin the prize angel and tease with some push/pull on her and it seems to be workin well. I will try to keep from meeting up with her unless I get a vibe that she is not looking for some kind of serious thing and just wants me for here and there due to nostalgia and some good sex.

Darthaidan
12-26-2005, 07:20 AM
interrested to know what she did after your last mail...?:)

Hypnovibe
12-26-2005, 07:46 AM
interrested to know what she did after your last mail...?:)
Oh dont worry I will keep the thread updated as to how things go. I thought it was done with because the last email she wrote me....(before she called and left a message) she kind of pushed me away sayin she is busy and doesnt have access to email. So I said well nice talkin then and good luck with everything. She waited a few days and then she called and left a message.....so it worked. The message I was conveying was Hey...if your too busy for me thats fine....I will be fine either way....you want to talk to me thats cool too....but I wont be coming after you like a puppydog....
After she left the message I went back to what i was doing before that was working well. I just wrote it today and I dont think she truely has easy access to a computer ((but I still wanted to send the message that if she wants to talk to me she will have to find a way)) so it may take her some time to get back to me. When she does I will continue my play by play.
Soon I will be out sarging again and will be doing some field reports. I cant wait!! I am reading swingcat juggler and I just got mystery's book! Unfortunately I downloaded mysteries book on my parents computer and there is no way to get it to be on my computer now. I emailed them about the problem. I hope they will help me out!!!!!!!! From what I have read so far it is really really detailed and makes a lot of sense. It is just packed to the sentence with valuable info. It is something that will take a lot of reframing and practice though. It has got a steep learning curve and will require at least the developement of some thick skin. They give advice on how to get good at it though and if you are willing to follow it than you will become very effective eventually. At first it feels like just too much to worry about and remember. Practice will make perfect. I feel I am at least months away from being able to effectively pull off the mystery method in a social setting with strangers that I approach....but if I was to just go out and do what he says I and didnt take things personally and kept at it I am sure I would get real good. i have inner game issues that I need to adress first though and I am not going to short change myself. I want to be solid top to bottom.

Hypnovibe
01-11-2006, 11:37 AM
Well the ex-girlfriend called and left a message on christmas and then called and left her number on new years. I had emailed her about her giving me her number after she called on christmas. When she called on new years though she busted on me for my message...she said...."You message is kinda queer and long but give me a call at blabla bye. I tried to call her back later that night but it was too loud and there were girls in my lap and stuff. I left a message at like 6am when it was quiet and said I was just returning her call to wish a happy new year and I will catch up with her later. I've heard nothing since. I think I will leave it at that.