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Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 06:22 PM
So I n-close on myspace, and call with-in the time frame I set ... so I call and everything goes well until the end (aside from a few couple second pauses) we had some fun banter, the convo was light and fun but heres the end:



*minor pause*
me: you sure do know how to keep a conversation going *sarcasm*
(^I dont know why I said this^)
her: sorry i dont know you
me: well ask me a question
(^attempt to start building comfort^)
her: i dont know any
(^IOD^)
me: ok well i'll let you go
(^I tried to return the IOD^)
her: ok
*we both hang up*


so then I figure I'd text real quick to make it seem less cold:


8:05 me: my shows on! ttyl
8:06 her: what show do you watch?
(^Still interested?^)
9:10 me: it's called 'Blah Blah' have you seen it?

and no text back.. thoughts? ideas? holler at me!

Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 06:24 PM
Matter of fact I just realized when she asked about me I didn't identity ground... I'm definitely going to add that next time

AshleyL
09-03-2007, 06:41 PM
Just so you know,

and I have no idea about how great your conversation skills are or anything.

But women absolutely hate the whole "ask me anything" game.

It takes the purpose and fun out of even having a CONVERSATION.

20 questions isn't sexy.

Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 06:46 PM
Just so you know,

and I have no idea about how great your conversation skills are or anything.

But women absolutely hate the whole "ask me anything" game.

It takes the purpose and fun out of even having a CONVERSATION.

20 questions isn't sexy.

Why was this not in a BOOK?! I'd say my conversational skills are slightly above par... I just kind of suck at applying material... lol so far

DeadEyeDick
09-03-2007, 06:56 PM
I have to admit I get a kick out of your posts, Ment4ll -- just out of curiosity, why did you pick that name and the wheel chair icon?

As for the back-and-forth, you seem pretty capable of self-diagnosing what's wrong.

I agree that practicing is important, but to paraphrase Vince Lombardi, it's not practice that makes perfect, it's perfect practice that makes perfect.

Your sarcasm reveals a lot about your own insecurities -- relax and have fun!

And keep posting.

AshleyL
09-03-2007, 06:57 PM
Well, let me rephrase.

Some girls MIGHT like playing that game, if they aren't confident enough in feeling like they can talk about whatever they want to.

I've observed that that game usually leads to sexual questions that just seem less "scary" to bring up in the form of "OOH you HAVE to answer my question" and "okay, your turn, ask me anything".

If this is the case (which I truly believe most of the time, it is) then the girl you're talking to isn't in touch enough with her sexuality, or boundaries in what she wants to bring to the table conversation-wise.

Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 07:14 PM
I have to admit I get a kick out of your posts, Ment4ll -- just out of curiosity, why did you pick that name and the wheel chair icon?

As for the back-and-forth, you seem pretty capable of self-diagnosing what's wrong.

I agree that practicing is important, but to paraphrase Vince Lombardi, it's not practice that makes perfect, it's perfect practice that makes perfect.

Your sarcasm reveals a lot about your own insecurities -- relax and have fun!

And keep posting.

Hah, ment4ll was a tag I used on a game, but I go by Joshua 101 in the community.. I picked the icon because I'm in a wheelchair.. and I too get a kick out of your name lol.. I don't want to imagine an icon to describe it though!

as far as insecurities go, I see what you mean, great insight.. I seriously felt like I needed to take a Xanax before I called lol it's my sticking point right now, but I feel I'm barreling through it..



Well, let me rephrase.

Some girls MIGHT like playing that game, if they aren't confident enough in feeling like they can talk about whatever they want to.

I've observed that that game usually leads to sexual questions that just seem less "scary" to bring up in the form of "OOH you HAVE to answer my question" and "okay, your turn, ask me anything".

If this is the case (which I truly believe most of the time, it is) then the girl you're talking to isn't in touch enough with her sexuality, or boundaries in what she wants to bring to the table conversation-wise.

that's interesting.. I hate when girls, or people in general, can't be open with the things they talk about in fear of being judged.. but in your opinion how would I deal with a girl like this?

AshleyL
09-03-2007, 07:19 PM
that's interesting.. I hate when girls, or people in general, can't be open with the things they talk about in fear of being judged.. but in your opinion how would I deal with a girl like this?

It's hard to say because it depends on how interested she was in the first place and what her motives were. Everyone is a little different.

how to "deal".... well there isn't much you could've done since she hung up, obviously... but before hand maybe just ask her more about herself?

You're saying you did most of the talking but was it about you or were you asking her tons of questions?

Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 07:32 PM
It's hard to say because it depends on how interested she was in the first place and what her motives were. Everyone is a little different.

how to "deal".... well there isn't much you could've done since she hung up, obviously... but before hand maybe just ask her more about herself?

You're saying you did most of the talking but was it about you or were you asking her tons of questions?
it was mainly stories with DHV spikes.. like I said I think identity grounding would have been great... basically I'm thinking I just need more practice to become more natural and aware of what's going on..

AshleyL
09-03-2007, 07:36 PM
Just realize that you're interesting to talk to as it is, and so worrying too much about DHV and stuff is overkill some times.

Naturally confident = sexy. Believe she's interested in you and she will be.

Ment4ll
09-03-2007, 07:48 PM
Just realize that you're interesting to talk to as it is, and so worrying too much about DHV and stuff is overkill some times.

Naturally confident = sexy. Believe she's interested in you and she will be.

Awesome, female input is priceless in this field .. as far as DHVing I think I will be able to recognize these things the more practice I get