View Full Version : Melbourne Venue Guide

04-2007-30, 09:23 PM
Elephant and Wheelbarrow (Cnr Burke + Exhibition) - good on Saturday nights with a live band. Can chill during band sets, or talk to girls hanging out near the toilet-area seats. Between band sets, its more relaxed and able to sarge at will. Not very target rich though, however everyone I've spoken to there is friendly.

Euro Bier Cafe (Exhibition st, between Burke+Flinders)- Way too loud upstairs in my experience... Good quality girls though on a saturday night. Downstairs, way more chilled, yet seems to be more of a 'meet up with friends before going out' bar, rather than a 'meet strangers' bar... A good place to get started for me, since the bartender there is a champ.

Industry Bar (120 A'Beckett St)- A backpackers lounge (makes for great logistics) Unfortunately, I went there after the superbowl, where I had been drinking since 8.30am, and cant remember too much (any) of it... From my friends, I hear it was quite full of girls though! Great for me, since I love french accents, and travellers (adventurous/spontaneous) so I'm looking forward to hitting it up sober.
-I went back sober at about 11.30pm, it was pretty empty. 2 girls there, both SD's (swamp donkey) and pretty bad all round.
Note: The first time I was there, there was the Ashes going on, so lots of English backpackers. Time your runs to this place, it could be good on the right dates.

Lucky Coq (Cnr Chapel + High Str)- Quiet enough to talk, every time I have been there, there has been plenty of girls to talk to. I used this bar the first 3 times I went sarging, and had some success, so no doubt anyone with more exp. would have a field day! Quality of women isnt that great, but the lighting makes them look hot.

onesixone (Cnr Chapel + High st, the orange doors) - I went here on a Thursday night, and it was quite good to begin with. I was there early, and had a great time opening the many sets of hot women that were there. Later on, a really crappy (and loud) band came on, making it next to impossible to open. During breaks in the band, it was once again really good.
However, the DJ was fucking horrible, so once he came on and the girls flocked to the dancefloor (about 12.30-1) opening became hard again.
Quality of women was very high.

Frostbites (Chapel somewhere)- It has everything... upstairs for getting in the mood (watching dancefloor) and downstairs there is a room for sarging, and a room for dancing. No matter what you're into, this bar can cater for it. Except strippers...

PlaySkool (Somewhere off Chapel)- Great poon, but RIDICULOUSLY loud. No chance... Unless you are an awesome non-verbal type guy

Room (680 GlenFerrie road- On occasions Ive been there, and it has been quiet enough to talk, yet other times it hasn't... When it is too loud, you can sarge one girl, but since when do hotties travel alone...

e55 (55 elizabeth st)- A good small place, but since I went there second, it was only 9pm and still pretty quiet. A good comfort venue (lots of couches, etc) but its hard to say the quality/amount of women, due to the time I went there.
Close to Transport though, which is a bonus.

Transport (Fed Square)- Quite possibly made by a PUA. It is perfect. Music isnt too loud, great location, plenty of women there. And get this -Upstairs there is a Jazz bar- And this bar has a balcony that overlooks the Yarra river. Its fucking MADE for comfort!
On the other hand, apparently plenty of guys have found out about this place, so it is always full, and hard to walk around. In my experience, the girls are in their groups, and the guys are in their groups. Its easy enough to bypass the shit ratio since no one else is opening.

Transit (upstairs of Transport) - I love this place. It is a quite jazz lounge/cocktail bar with a cute french waitress. It is perfect for day2's or comfort building, as it has a live jazz band on Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. It also has a balcony that overlooks the Yarra, which is just amazing at night time. There are usually 1-3 sets in there that can be opened, but they are never young. This is a much better place for taking girls than for meeting them.
Meet girls downstairs and bring them up.
Note: On Friday and Saturday there is a $5 cover.
Band Times (rough)
Thursday: 9-12
Fri/Sat: 10.30-1.30

Colonial Hotel (AKA. Next, Click Click, Plastic)
I believe on public-holiday-eves, this place is called Plastic. I went there tonight (Plastic) and it was fucking fantastic! The amount of beautiful women was astounding, and upstairs there is a 'party room' where they played some great old stuff (New Order, Clash, etc.) There is a great area where there is a lot of traffic, yet is quiet enough to easily have a conversation. If you hate rock/punk/emo music, this isnt the place for you, but if you can stand it/enjoy it, then it fucking rocks!
I was so shocked at the amount of good looking girls there, and the easability for sarging. I will definately be going back.
Thursday: Next
Saturday: Click Click
Public Holiday Eve: Plastic
I will rate the other 2 nights as I go to them.

Public Bar (Cnr O'Connell and Victoria st)- Mondays is Backpackers night. Let it be known that whilst I met no backpackers, it was full of uni students. Hot uni students...
I was amazed at the quality of women. It appears many are regulars, so it makes it easier to see them again if you dont close at all, but this also means if you use routines, you might end up getting caught a fair bit...
$1 pots, $4.50 jugs = you can also get drunk cheaply if you so wish.
Its very easy going, and music is so quiet you can hardly hear it. Great venue for sarging.
BTW - get there early, last night it quietened up at 11.30, but was packed at 8.30

Famous (QBH, near Crown) - Lots of hot girls, but it is loud. Not really my style because I get sick of loud clubs, but there are really plenty of girls there...
Massive place too

Metro (Burke st, near Parliament) - Like Famous, it is huge and too loud. This place is renowned for having too many underage girls, and it shows. The people there are really short... Once again, not my style.

05-2007-01, 09:32 PM
The Long Room on Collins st is also an awesome venue.

Older crowd...but the women ALL fuck!....which is a huge bonus!

05-2007-02, 07:25 AM
I'm probly going there on Friday so I will add it after then.

07-2007-17, 09:51 PM
Nice work bhzmafia!

I'dd add what I can to this, so here goes....

Eurotrash (near Chinatown)
Three levels, decent talent, I've only been there on a Saturday night. Gets a bid loud later in the night (house, electro etc.) Older crowd there (mid 20's)

CQ (Queens St)
Very popular on a Saturday night, closes at 7am. Pretty good talent there, but a bit pretentious, but that seems to go hand in hand. Large dance floor, but many areas to start conversations. Has an outdoor area, but I imagine that would be the smoking area now.

Beach (Beaconsfield Rd, Port Melbourne)
Very good talent, older crowd, slightly sophisticated. The dress code is more stringent that most places. Only a small dance floor and isn't that loud, so it is ideal for conversations. I've only been once but plan on going back. Closes relatively early - 1.00am.

Beach (Docklands)
Decent sized place with two main rooms, younger crowd on Friday night (playing dance & r'n'b), and slightly older on Saturday (playing 1980's). Has some areas to start conversations, but can be a bit loud at times.

Fix Bar (Docklands)
Younger crowd, quite a few areas to start a conversation. I've only been on a Friday night, was a bit of a sausage fest the night I went :(

Arcadia (Punt & Toorak Rds, South Yarra)
Quite a large venue with two level, large area for pool tables. Some of the areas for conversations/comfort is now the smoking area. Bit of a mixed bag talent wise, can be a sausage fest at times.

The Hawthorn (Burwood Rd, Hawthorn)
Thursday night - uni crowd, decent talent, enough areas to start a convesation.
Friday night - karoake night, I would avoid
Saturday night - very young crowd, other than that, same as Thursday

The Glenferrie (Glenferrie Rd, Hawthorn)
Never seems to attract much of a crowd, therefore not a very target rich environment. I would avoid.

Plan B lounge (Bridge Rd, Richmond)
Funky bar, can get a bit loud & crowded as the night progresses, but pretty good talent there. Usually mid 20's+.

The Swan (Swan St, Richmond)
Quieter on a Friday, very popular on a Saturday. Usually an older crowd, talent wise a bit of a mixed bag. Similar to Plan B, mid 20's