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athlete
02-12-2007, 06:06 AM
the girl i'm interested in says she doesn't want a boyfriend right now. she's been messed around and is over guys at the moment. she's told me this and i've heard from friends that this is how she feels at the moment.

what does this mean for my chances? is it an opportunity or a very difficult barrier that needs to be broken?

ilink
02-12-2007, 07:29 AM
it doesn't seem she is girlfriend material at the moment. Keep your options open and be c&f with her and tease her a bit more than other girls who have more serious attitude towards relationships. You will have competition so make sure you project you are the alpha male.Using value elicitation you can find out the direction you have to move(prepare your material). Check what she likes in a guy and use it to get her. Maybe using DHV stories and push-pull.

seldomseen
02-12-2007, 10:25 AM
ilink you're missing the point. It means her past relationships have put a damper on her belief system about men and relationships. It's not that she doesnt want a boyfriend its that she doesnt want the wrong man in her life.

This issue can be a double edged sword - come off as too nice and she'll push you away because other her past relationships have distorted her view as to what she feels she is worthy of. However if you come off too cool, cocky and sure of yourself then she'll lose her confidence and become more insecure
and also push you away. Depending on how bad she's been messed around
it's really hard to win in these type of situations. One day she'll tell you you're the greatest guy on earth and the next she'll complain because you didnt tell her you loved her back. You need to dig deep and find out her values, beliefs and her past to figure out how to dissolve her filters and thats what it is - a filter. With these type of situations I've always gotten laid and then made a new friend afterwards. :-)

ilink
02-12-2007, 04:28 PM
seldomseen I find your point of view very useful and less risky, I believe we both agree she has low self esteem at the moment to be like this,I just prefer the "go for it..." in a powerful way. Since you say your approach works for you in similar situations, hey that's really good!

miaddict
02-12-2007, 05:02 PM
the girl i'm interested in says she doesn't want a boyfriend right now.
That's good for you right? You can put back your bf destroyers manual to the shelf.


she's been messed around and is over guys at the moment.

dormant lesbian tendencies perhaps?


she's told me this and i've heard from friends that this is how she feels at the moment.
Change her feelings, and you'd change her mind.


what does this mean for my chances? is it an opportunity or a very difficult barrier that needs to be broken?

Your chances are the same whether you try or not. So, game her if you are sincere, and are not going to leave her as thrash after the act. Relationship expectations are an important component of rapport and future LTR. A woman is emotional and live in the moment. Unless her 'no bf rule' is engraved in stone, it's just an emotional protection that you can circumvent by not being like the other guys.

crh
02-13-2007, 03:30 AM
The EXACT same thing happened to me recently.

I said "I don't care." Then I kissed her. She damned me and moved in for further kisses. Worked like a dream.

JuiceTerry
02-13-2007, 04:51 AM
that is gold!! "I Don't Care" --- sweet.

Good to see you here again CRH, we should hook up for a sarge during the week.