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Siax
02-09-2007, 04:49 PM
What are the Key Elements in Keeping A LTR?

everyone has their views, put something down. =)

meanlandlord
02-09-2007, 05:38 PM
Be good in bed
Consistently be more alpha than the guys she knows
Provide her with an element for her to take care of you for (ie women have a natural desire to nurture and comfort, show enough of you that she can fullfill this need)

Perry
02-09-2007, 06:32 PM
Be her best friend, and her best lover.

That's basically it, right there.

APBT
02-09-2007, 07:39 PM
Having ruined more ltr's than not I have some insight on what not to do. So if this helps...then it helps.

An LTR is about more than just sex. Treat it that way

Words are very powerful, too bad you can't un-say some stuff.

If you feel like an ltr is spinning out of control, control the only thing you can...yourself.

Shit tests sometimes don't stop just slow down.

Know when it's time to let go...it's often earlier than you might think.


APBT

WeAre138
02-11-2007, 06:59 AM
Be empathetic. So often you'll not be sure what the hell she is fliping out about; take the moment and put yourself in her shoes. You may not agree with her, but you be able to better handle the situation.

Admit mistakes and move on. Can't say this too many times.

The Don
02-11-2007, 10:14 AM
This is an excerpt of something I posted in the Lounge but applicable... Do not think like Dr. Phil.

"...For many girls, there's a drop in sex drive once they've got you "hooked". They often become more maternal and less sexual. It takes more work to move them back into that role.

A key to that is to never be "hooked" and they'll fuck you like it's the first month if they don't feel like they own you. But eventually, if you want to be in a relationship, you do have to allow her to feel like you are committed... While maintaining some of the Stanley Kowalski in Streetcar style masculanity. Always maintain the reality that you are a powerful man who has and takes what he wants.

One of the reason, women turn off sexually in a relationship is that the man often becomes "feminized" and softened when he's in love and has been tamed... Which was her goal, initially, but ironically, this makes her less "sexually" attracted to him.

If I do choose to be monogamous, I think I would err on the side of remaining alpha than being the sharing sensitive soulmate who reveals all his inner fears and weaknesses. I know this is the opposite of what most relarionship "experts" advise, but I've managed to multiple keep serious FBs around for over a year with them still calling me for sex and telling me they love me by doing this. And I offer no signs of commitment. There are other factors involved in being able to do this that would take an essay to write, but this is a major one...

And I think of my grandfather, who in no way was a role model, but he swaggered through life like fucking John Wayne and had dozens of girlfriends on the side while with my grandmonther who was a knockout... Ended up running off with a hot 20 yr. old when he was in his 40s and she worshipped the ground he walked til the day he died. In many ways, he was an asshole, but his his inability to be softened drew women to him like flies. Learn to emulate this without being a prick and you'll get somewhere.

More of an Inner Game solution, but a overarchingly effective one nonetheless."