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View Full Version : How did I mess this up and fail with seemingly interested girls?



welling
02-21-2018, 02:38 AM
Strange night last night. It gave me a rare confidence boost because, for some reason, I was getting a number of IOI's and stuff from girls. This never happens to me. Not sure why this was.

The downside is that I was still unable to capitalise on these initially somewhat interested girls. I tried my best, but I just couldn't keep their interest I guess. Or maybe I showed too much intent? Or maybe not enough? I have no idea. Either way, I went home empty handed.

we go too a dance bar where I bump into my teenage female cousin. She has 2 hot friends with her who i've never met and straight away one of them calls me 'cute'. (this never happens to me btw. I had the 'lynx' effect going on last night for some reason!)

We all get to talking. i'm laughing with my cousin because I banged a friend of hers a while back and she didn't know. The friend had just turned 18 and i'm in my 30's and we laughed about the age gap.

We go and dance, and the friend who called me 'cute' is now grinding on me as i'm talking to my cousin. However, hard to explain, but I really sensed that it was more of a 'tease'. Like she was trying to get a reaction from my cousin? Like '''Hehe, i'm grinding on your cousin! Isn't this funny'' kind of thing. Like she would never have actually went home with me or whatever. Hard to explain, but I strongly sensed this. Either way, I let her grind on me, and ran my hands across her hips a little, but didn't say anything or get TOO handsy. I'm not even sure how to react exactly when this happens, as it never happens to me. (do I talk when she's grinding on me? What do I say?)
After a while the girls go to smoke and i'm in there with some friends still dancing

Some time passes by and now a very hot girl who looks like a punk actually opens me and claims that we met a few weeks back in that same bar. I don't remember her at all. No idea if it's true.

I decide to go direct and basically tell her she's cute. I tell her to join me at the bar as I need a beer. This is where it got weird, because she was trying to get served too, and we spent way too long just not talking. I kind of didn't really know what to talk about, and when I DID say something, she didn't seem particularly engaged at all. We got served and again, I spoke to her about when exactly we met. Asked her name and stuff and made some comments on her 'look', but yeah, she just didn't seem into me at all, despite opening me. It fizzled out soon, and within minutes, I was back dancing with my cousin and her friends, and she was flirting with some other dude fairly close to me.

At this point, my cousins hot friend is near me again. I think I decided to make a bit of a move and made some statements of intent. Went into some roleplay about us making cute babies. Shortly after this, she announced that I probably have a small dick!! In front oy my cousin, and the other people we were with! Not sure if this was a weird shit test.

I agreed and amplified as per game theory. Laughed. Told her ''How did you know!!? Who have you been talking too! But yeah...it's like a wet baby carrot''. She laughed. My cousin laughed too and was like ''Can we please stop talking about my cousins cock!!''

Memory is slighlty blurry at this point, but I think at one point, the cute friend put her mouth very close to mine as if to kiss me. But AGAIN, I got the same 'vibe' as earlier, that it was more for the benefit of my cousin. I really felt that i'd get rejected if I had have moved in for the makeout and so instead we just both kind of shared this moment where both of our mouths were very close and we both laughed whilst looking into each others eyes. Kind of teasing each other?

I actually fancied my cousins other friend even more, but I wasn't able too 'attract' her at all. I opened her and told her I recognise her from a certain bar I drink at and tried to get her talking, but she didn't seem to want to play ball.

I wish I had better 'material' to help me through the initial 3-5 mins of each new interaction.

At around this point, I saw my cousins hot friends leave. They didn't even say 'goodbye' to me. I don't remember much more about the night really although I did fail to open a few hot girls as, again, Approach anxiety got the better of me.

Overall a weird night. It's not often that girls seem initially into me, but I wasn't able to capitalize. Haven't really learnt anything as such. Like, I think I need better verbals, but i'm not sure what I should have been saying. And i'm not sure what I done wrong with my cousins hot friend tbh

Did I show my intent to late? Not enough intent? Should have done something else instead of the 'we'd make cute babies' things to show my intent?

Honey Badger
02-24-2018, 08:52 PM
Strange night last night. It gave me a rare confidence boost because, for some reason, I was getting a number of IOI's and stuff from girls. This never happens to me. Not sure why this was.

The downside is that I was still unable to capitalise on these initially somewhat interested girls. I tried my best, but I just couldn't keep their interest I guess. Or maybe I showed too much intent? Or maybe not enough? I have no idea. Either way, I went home empty handed.

we go too a dance bar where I bump into my teenage female cousin. She has 2 hot friends with her who i've never met and straight away one of them calls me 'cute'. (this never happens to me btw. I had the 'lynx' effect going on last night for some reason!)

We all get to talking. i'm laughing with my cousin because I banged a friend of hers a while back and she didn't know. The friend had just turned 18 and i'm in my 30's and we laughed about the age gap.

We go and dance, and the friend who called me 'cute' is now grinding on me as i'm talking to my cousin. However, hard to explain, but I really sensed that it was more of a 'tease'. Like she was trying to get a reaction from my cousin? Like '''Hehe, i'm grinding on your cousin! Isn't this funny'' kind of thing. Like she would never have actually went home with me or whatever. Hard to explain, but I strongly sensed this. Either way, I let her grind on me, and ran my hands across her hips a little, but didn't say anything or get TOO handsy. I'm not even sure how to react exactly when this happens, as it never happens to me. (do I talk when she's grinding on me? What do I say?)
After a while the girls go to smoke and i'm in there with some friends still dancing

Some time passes by and now a very hot girl who looks like a punk actually opens me and claims that we met a few weeks back in that same bar. I don't remember her at all. No idea if it's true.

I decide to go direct and basically tell her she's cute. I tell her to join me at the bar as I need a beer. This is where it got weird, because she was trying to get served too, and we spent way too long just not talking. I kind of didn't really know what to talk about, and when I DID say something, she didn't seem particularly engaged at all. We got served and again, I spoke to her about when exactly we met. Asked her name and stuff and made some comments on her 'look', but yeah, she just didn't seem into me at all, despite opening me. It fizzled out soon, and within minutes, I was back dancing with my cousin and her friends, and she was flirting with some other dude fairly close to me.

At this point, my cousins hot friend is near me again. I think I decided to make a bit of a move and made some statements of intent. Went into some roleplay about us making cute babies. Shortly after this, she announced that I probably have a small dick!! In front oy my cousin, and the other people we were with! Not sure if this was a weird shit test.

I agreed and amplified as per game theory. Laughed. Told her ''How did you know!!? Who have you been talking too! But yeah...it's like a wet baby carrot''. She laughed. My cousin laughed too and was like ''Can we please stop talking about my cousins cock!!''

Memory is slighlty blurry at this point, but I think at one point, the cute friend put her mouth very close to mine as if to kiss me. But AGAIN, I got the same 'vibe' as earlier, that it was more for the benefit of my cousin. I really felt that i'd get rejected if I had have moved in for the makeout and so instead we just both kind of shared this moment where both of our mouths were very close and we both laughed whilst looking into each others eyes. Kind of teasing each other?

I actually fancied my cousins other friend even more, but I wasn't able too 'attract' her at all. I opened her and told her I recognise her from a certain bar I drink at and tried to get her talking, but she didn't seem to want to play ball.

I wish I had better 'material' to help me through the initial 3-5 mins of each new interaction.

At around this point, I saw my cousins hot friends leave. They didn't even say 'goodbye' to me. I don't remember much more about the night really although I did fail to open a few hot girls as, again, Approach anxiety got the better of me.

Overall a weird night. It's not often that girls seem initially into me, but I wasn't able to capitalize. Haven't really learnt anything as such. Like, I think I need better verbals, but i'm not sure what I should have been saying. And i'm not sure what I done wrong with my cousins hot friend tbh

Did I show my intent to late? Not enough intent? Should have done something else instead of the 'we'd make cute babies' things to show my intent?

I say you should've escalated on the girl you pulled to the bar more. She may have thought you weren't really interested, hard to say.

Your cousins friend who danced with you, same thing... Try and isolate and escalate. Going direct in situations like that is easy and quite beneficial if there into you. Cuts out the bullshit and gets straight to the point.

Banter like 'we'd make cute babies' is ok but may not be clear enough if they think you're sarcastic or something. Direct compliments show intent/interest. Sounds like a fun night, but work on escalating women especially when you get them isolated.

Lemonjacket
02-26-2018, 10:23 PM
Strange night last night. It gave me a rare confidence boost because, for some reason, I was getting a number of IOI's and stuff from girls. This never happens to me. Not sure why this was.

The downside is that I was still unable to capitalise on these initially somewhat interested girls. I tried my best, but I just couldn't keep their interest I guess. Or maybe I showed too much intent? Or maybe not enough? I have no idea. Either way, I went home empty handed.

we go too a dance bar where I bump into my teenage female cousin. She has 2 hot friends with her who i've never met and straight away one of them calls me 'cute'. (this never happens to me btw. I had the 'lynx' effect going on last night for some reason!)

We all get to talking. i'm laughing with my cousin because I banged a friend of hers a while back and she didn't know. The friend had just turned 18 and i'm in my 30's and we laughed about the age gap.

We go and dance, and the friend who called me 'cute' is now grinding on me as i'm talking to my cousin. However, hard to explain, but I really sensed that it was more of a 'tease'. Like she was trying to get a reaction from my cousin? Like '''Hehe, i'm grinding on your cousin! Isn't this funny'' kind of thing. Like she would never have actually went home with me or whatever. Hard to explain, but I strongly sensed this. Either way, I let her grind on me, and ran my hands across her hips a little, but didn't say anything or get TOO handsy. I'm not even sure how to react exactly when this happens, as it never happens to me. (do I talk when she's grinding on me? What do I say?)
After a while the girls go to smoke and i'm in there with some friends still dancing

Some time passes by and now a very hot girl who looks like a punk actually opens me and claims that we met a few weeks back in that same bar. I don't remember her at all. No idea if it's true.

I decide to go direct and basically tell her she's cute. I tell her to join me at the bar as I need a beer. This is where it got weird, because she was trying to get served too, and we spent way too long just not talking. I kind of didn't really know what to talk about, and when I DID say something, she didn't seem particularly engaged at all. We got served and again, I spoke to her about when exactly we met. Asked her name and stuff and made some comments on her 'look', but yeah, she just didn't seem into me at all, despite opening me. It fizzled out soon, and within minutes, I was back dancing with my cousin and her friends, and she was flirting with some other dude fairly close to me.

At this point, my cousins hot friend is near me again. I think I decided to make a bit of a move and made some statements of intent. Went into some roleplay about us making cute babies. Shortly after this, she announced that I probably have a small dick!! In front oy my cousin, and the other people we were with! Not sure if this was a weird shit test.

I agreed and amplified as per game theory. Laughed. Told her ''How did you know!!? Who have you been talking too! But yeah...it's like a wet baby carrot''. She laughed. My cousin laughed too and was like ''Can we please stop talking about my cousins cock!!''

Memory is slighlty blurry at this point, but I think at one point, the cute friend put her mouth very close to mine as if to kiss me. But AGAIN, I got the same 'vibe' as earlier, that it was more for the benefit of my cousin. I really felt that i'd get rejected if I had have moved in for the makeout and so instead we just both kind of shared this moment where both of our mouths were very close and we both laughed whilst looking into each others eyes. Kind of teasing each other?

I actually fancied my cousins other friend even more, but I wasn't able too 'attract' her at all. I opened her and told her I recognise her from a certain bar I drink at and tried to get her talking, but she didn't seem to want to play ball.

I wish I had better 'material' to help me through the initial 3-5 mins of each new interaction.

At around this point, I saw my cousins hot friends leave. They didn't even say 'goodbye' to me. I don't remember much more about the night really although I did fail to open a few hot girls as, again, Approach anxiety got the better of me.

Overall a weird night. It's not often that girls seem initially into me, but I wasn't able to capitalize. Haven't really learnt anything as such. Like, I think I need better verbals, but i'm not sure what I should have been saying. And i'm not sure what I done wrong with my cousins hot friend tbh

Did I show my intent to late? Not enough intent? Should have done something else instead of the 'we'd make cute babies' things to show my intent?You overanalyze way too much. Your beliefs are your biggest hurdle. You doubt yourself and don't give yourself credit when you do something well. You just convince yourself, "oh, that's bc it was my cousin's friend" "she just wants to get a rise out of her" "Girls dont normally find me attractive, so it was probably a weird night" etc.

You're going to continue to have nights like this until you work on your inner dialogue. Stop focusing on having more things to say. You don't need more game, you need less game.

Focus on basic principles - smiling, escalating, telling girls they 'turn you on', getting in their personal space, putting your hands through their hair and on their neck - basically, show LOTS of sexual intent. And no, you can never display too much.

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