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View Full Version : Divorce - advice on how to frame this?



mpitts342
01-22-2018, 09:20 AM
Big fan of reading this message board, but my first time posting. I've been married about 2 years and at this point it seems like a divorce is inevitable. My question is how I should talk about this to other women. There are several women in my social circle I'd like to try to hook up with post-divorce. They are aware that I'm currently married so doesn't seem like a topic that can be avoided.

What is the best way to frame this to my advantage? I don't want to complain about how awful my wife was, etc. because I would come off bitter/angry. Also don't want to seem like a beta. Any advice?

Honey Badger
01-22-2018, 09:40 AM
Big fan of reading this message board, but my first time posting. I've been married about 2 years and at this point it seems like a divorce is inevitable. My question is how I should talk about this to other women. There are several women in my social circle I'd like to try to hook up with post-divorce. They are aware that I'm currently married so doesn't seem like a topic that can be avoided.

What is the best way to frame this to my advantage? I don't want to complain about how awful my wife was, etc. because I would come off bitter/angry. Also don't want to seem like a beta. Any advice?

You should probably wait until the divorce is final (or you get legally separated depending on the laws in your state) before you do anything regarding other women. That could bite you in the ass if things go sour.

Once that's done, I wouldn't even worry about framing it. If it comes up, say you're divorced so they know you're on the market and proceed like normal. You're right, talking about it could appear desperate or whatever. Don't feed into it if it's not brought up. Just ensure the legalities don't get in the way.

mpitts342
01-22-2018, 02:54 PM
You're absolutely right, don't want to do anything that could cost me any additional money. Let's say I'm talking to someone (post-divorce) and it goes like this:

HB: I thought you were married
Me: Nope, not anymore
HB: What happened?
Me: ??

Any advice on how to proceed from that point to cast myself in a favorable light?

Honey Badger
01-22-2018, 04:30 PM
You: it wasn't working out and we decided to end it civilly instead of dragging out what wasn't there.

Or whatever. Just be a normal person about it. If you're cool with it, then keep acting cool with it. Explain that you're a grown up and are going through the process of moving on. Be congruent and don't act like something you're not when you start doing approaches again.