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View Full Version : Got needy with girl I used to talk to, recover how?



ifhy
08-01-2016, 04:17 AM
Background: > Talked to the girl last year for approx 7-9 months, she was in a relationship, we developed strong feelings for one another and ended up spending some time together after talking on fb for a while, it all went really well and we had some great moments but she was not ready to end that relationship, so she broke it off and I did show a little neediness but she contacted me and I contacted her once or twice afterward and I wished her well and everything.
>I was trying to move on but we had a really strong rapport and connection and I found out inadvertently from a friend that she had broken that relationship off and so I decided since I really cared for the girl, that I would see if she was willing to re-connect, I added her on fb and she responded right away but after adding her I noticed she had pictures of a new guy on there but her profile says single and it appears it may not be very serious (not sure tbh) but I figured we had a strong connection and so it was worth giving it a shot to see if we still clicked

Here's our fb conversation, just wondering how to proceed forward from here

We ended up talking for at least an hour or so, catching up, seemed flirty fun and responsive but then she just dropped off out of nowhere and I pulled a beta...

Her: You don't get the trash
And their clothes are adorable

Me: haha yes, plus as we discussed before, their bathrooms smell amazing and for some reason i can just walk around in it
not the bathroom, the store lolol

Her: Haha it's just a pleasant place. I can spend hours

Me:and yes I agree, they do have nice clothes
bum out in the target book section

Me: I did think you meant bathroom at first haha
haha i felt i should clarify
i just have a thing like, I hate the smell of bathroom soap
but their's smelled fruity and pleasant
and the last time i went to a pirates game, we stopped at this bathroom in this parking garage and the soap smelled like pineapple
and see i remember this because usually bathroom soap is just awful

Her:Omg yessssss
I'm the same way!
Like that generic orange colored soap
I hate it

Me: like when someone has a bar of dial in their bathroom, I question their entire personality

Her: I have all these amazing soaps from
Bath and Body Works. Right now I have salted pineapple and a cherry champagne
I have ones for the holidays too. Sugar cookie and gingerbread . Stuff like that

Me:I'm sure you smell delicious

I'm very particular with soap
just don't go down the watermelon route

Her: Haha because you don't like it or black peoples (inside joke about how she attracts only black guys and lesbians)

Me: haha because black peoples

Her:Thank you 😁 I have to smell nice
True. I didn't get the watermelon one

ME: you don't need another attractant to the dark chocolate

Her: That reminds me

Me: maybe find a mayo perfume

Her: I rescued a kitten that was being abused over the winter
From the projects that are locked down
In the middle of the night
Bahaha

Me: LOL
you crazy lady, anything for the kitties

Her: My friend Mike was like "you are the definition of a snow bunny. Why would you do that!!?"

Me: LOL

Her: Anything for any animal being a busied
Abused
It was crazy

Me: aw yes I know, you are a sweet one

Her: I thought I was going to die
Dawh thank ya kind sir

Me: like one of those rogue activists
that clip fences and free the cows and shit
come in a ski mask, wrangling up abused kitties
carrying a 9
using a darth vader voice changer
"if you touch another fucking cat, I will skin you alive and feed that skin in the form of bacon, to your children"

And then the conversation just went dead at that point at like 3 am and then I sent these awful texts...lol

THU 2:37PM (after more than 24 hours or so)
sorry if I somehow made you uncomfortable or something, I just wanted to catch up and see how you were doing, it was really nice talking to you, if you're ever up for another one just shoot me a message, take care

Her: No you didn't do anything. The past two days have just been horrible and I'm really sick. I'm sorry

Me: oh ok, well I didnt want to jump to any conclusions or seem weird, sorry to hear that. I hope you feel better soon
*sends dwarves* (inside joke from the past)

So yeah...no reply in like a few days since then, was thinking about re-initiating contact with her with a sick cat meme and say "still u?" and see if that keeps things light and fun again, I really didn't want to sperg out on her but I guess I couldn't help but think it was really weird for her to abandon that conversation when it was going on for like 2 hours and it was constantly fun and funny.

Sorry for the wall of text, would really appreciate any insight on this one

ifhy
08-01-2016, 04:58 AM
*Forgot to say that she replied to that beta message immediately, within seconds, don't know if that makes a difference*

MrProdigy
08-05-2016, 11:58 AM
Did you have a goal when you decided to message her or did you simply plan to make her your gf over text?

Is that message from her about the trash the first message?

Do you think your rogue activist message required a response? How is one to credibly respond to it?

At what point has a conversation gone on for long enough in your opinion? Time stamps for this would be nice. At least first and last message time


Sent from my HUAWEI G7-L03 using Tapatalk

ifhy
08-07-2016, 02:44 AM
Did you have a goal when you decided to message her or did you simply plan to make her your gf over text?

Is that message from her about the trash the first message?

Do you think your rogue activist message required a response? How is one to credibly respond to it?

At what point has a conversation gone on for long enough in your opinion? Time stamps for this would be nice. At least first and last message time


Sent from my HUAWEI G7-L03 using Tapatalk


My goal was to see if we still clicked after not speaking for so long, see if any chemistry was still there and then afterward I was going to try to ask her out on a date if I felt things would have gone well.

We were having nonsensical back and forth banter the whole time, she would have responded to it if she wanted to. The content isn't important honestly. No it didn't start with that trash. The full conversation is quite a bit longer. I think approx an hour or so, idk. She didn't message me back the next day, so I sent that message the day after. Then after 5 days or something like that I sent a lighthearted message to see if I could salvage anything or w/e and then she messaged me back a couple times, one message per day basically, several hours apart and now she's ceased contact with me again.

Times stamp approximation: She messaged me at 12:31, replying to a "Hi how are you" I sent the day before and she dropped off at around 3 am.
She just dropped off without saying she had to go or anything like that and then didn't message me back the next day saying she fell asleep or w/e so I guess long enough for her to say "I have to go, goodnight" Plus a little earlier in the conversation I asked if she had to go and she said she'd be up.


It's all a wash at this point, she hasn't responded to my last message and it's unlikely she even wants to speak to me at all, she just didn't want to be impolite I would guess. So yeah, it doesn't matter anymore but thanks for the reply anyway.

ifhy
08-07-2016, 03:08 AM
Updated conversation since this posting mentioned in my reply:

Me -TUE 8:26AM
u still? (sent meme to reopen lightheartedly)

TUE 6:58PM

Hahah
Yeah I'm so sick
But I'm at work
And currently dying I think

WED 6:20PM

Me-what a trooper ��,but wait...should you be working...in a hospital...when you're sick...?!? :0
if you do die, I promise to show up with a 40 and pour some out for you homegirl
WED 8:49PM

Her -Hahah no but my job doesn't accept doctors excuses ? So my next call off is a suspension without pay
Thank you dood. You da real MVP. Write me a kickass eulogy too. Start it out with "them titties were A1."

Me -you'd think since it is union haha, that's a shame. If you do get suspended, we can hang out at the park and throw rocks at trains like the trash kids that used to get suspended back in the day. Keep the tradition alive.

Me -Most Valuable Playa? *brush mah shoulder off* I will def start it with that followed by "Those titties were A1 and like A1 they great on steak, tube steak...Now let me get real with ya'll for a sec...you shoulda buried hurr facing down, cause dat ass was a gift from the lord above, ya'll didn't know but she could twerk the alphabet"

Her -Hahaha sounds like a plan. Actually I'm going to be working by myself tomorrow because my coworker's grandma died, so I'm about to call off just to piss them off lol. Since they want to overwork us and not hire anybody
So tempting
Hahahah that's all I could ask for tbh. Then I want a mournful rendition of "Baby Got Back" to play in the background

Me -oooooh bad girl, I feel you on that though...lol every day at Walmart, 1 lonely person (me) constantly overworked. some ol bs. Well the offer is there, just hit me up and we'll find some tracks, I'll bring the 6 pack of rotgut beer, you bring the nudie mags.
haha yes, I will assemble a southern gospel choir of old black ladies to do the backup "baby got backkkk" cello will be at the forefront, and I will mournfully croon like Roy Orbison
Chat Conversation End
Seen Wed 10:02pm

gq1
08-15-2016, 03:08 PM
Here's our fb conversation, just wondering how to proceed forward from here
You claimed your goal was to discover "if you still clicked" yet "We ended up talking for at least an hour or so" ??

You've already hung out with this girl. It should be no more than 5-10 minutes of chit-chat before you're suggesting concrete plans to hang out.


So yeah...no reply in like a few days since then, was thinking about re-initiating contact with her with a sick cat meme and say "still u?" and see if that keeps things light and fun again, I really didn't want to sperg out on her but I guess I couldn't help but think it was really weird for her to abandon that conversation when it was going on for like 2 hours and it was constantly fun and funny.
You seems strangely obsessed with maintaining an endless "light and fun and funny" conversation with this girl on facebook. People actually need something serious to eventually happen in their lives at some point. There is absolutely NOTHING weird about a woman abandoning endless conversations which have absolutely no purpose.

Simple:

- If you want a pen-pal, then just keep writing her cyber-letters whenever you feel like it, and don't worry about the timing.

- If you want a date, then ask her on a date.