View Full Version : Weird situation with this girl

05-30-2014, 10:36 AM
There's this girl in my university that i started to talk with about 1 month ago, she has a "boyfriend" but she doesn't have anything official in her facebook or talks about him with me and someone told me they were hooking up for some time.

The thing is i'm pretty sure she is attracted to me and loves my attention. I noticied two of her friends looking at me a lot sometimes to see if i'm looking at her (both with boyfriends) so i approached her and got her alone last week when she was with one of her friends to have a bigger "impact".

When i approached her i'm pretty sure the smile on her friend face was a good thing since she tried to suppress it, i asked her out and she used the "boyfriend" as an excuse so i told her that i don't believe she really has a boyfriend, she tried to convince me that she "talks" about her boyfriend but i just kind of ignored it and about 3s later we both went our way and i'm pretty sure i was able to show her that her "rejection" didn't have any effect on me.

She sometimes would stare at me in classes and now even after one week with no contact she still keeps looking even more at me when i "can't" notice her staring but has yet to try to make any kind of contact with me.

So guys what do you think about this? most of the time i'm with 1~2 girl by my side (they both have a boyfriend/husband) i'm confident/a bit popular in my class. I will not keep chasing this girl but i can't help but be curious about this.(she never really answered my invitation, just talked about having a boyfriend, with her i get the feeling like when a girl is playing hard to get and wants you to chase however she has a boyfriend).

This girl also is more "reserved" with guys than the usual girls at least here in Brazil and i'm sure i'm the only guy in my class that is able to talk/joke with her

06-13-2014, 10:26 PM
Hey Everylone :)

Seems like you're doing good. Pursue it, I'd say. A couple things that came to my mind when I read your post:

1. Putting relationships up on facebook is for kids. She might really have one.

2. Are you guys flirting? Get her number! Are you not? Do it anyway.

3. Talk to her friends, find out about the boyfriend.

4. Try talking to her when she's by herself or have her walk you to class or something like that.

5. By walking away 3 seconds after she threw the boyfriend-objection you failed the shit test. Should've stayed switched topics ;)

Okay that's it so far, have fun!

06-21-2014, 04:34 AM
From what i've being told/seen if they may be really dating but it doesn't seen really serious yet and they know each other for like 2~3 years but only 6~7 months with each other and i already had her number. When she told me she had a boyfriend it went like this "you know i have a boyfriend..right?(she was nervous) and i told her i had a dog too, actually 3 and one was a bit jealous, after that she said he was a human being and i told her about believing he isn't a "real" boyfriend so even if i failed the shit test i don't think it was that bad because i felt i wouldn't get nothing out of it and i walked away mostly because i had to.

One week week after this she would stare at me a lot in class when i would be looking at something else and from what i've seen she missed the attention and wasn't even a bit mad at me for calling her boyfriend a dog and not a real boyfriend(she tried to get my attention in the whatsapp group of my class). The next week after this one i had to study for my exams but after they ended i approached her again (from what i've seen she liked it but..) and even though i could feel she missed the attention, when i asked her out with a true "i don't care about your answer" she told "you know what i said before.." and i told her the same but now i couldn't bring myself to care and i think she felt it too because this day i was really indifferent and a bit colder i think towards her

Through messages and face to face i think i made my intentions pretty clear and now if i send a message to her (holidays started here) i think it would be like chasing her too hard so i'm trying to improve myself till August, make a few changes to my appearence and grew a beard ;D, however i don't know if the best thing to do now is to send a message/next her being indifferent and if she is interessed later she may approach or..

The situation is a bit more complicated than this but if i were to explain would be too long but i hope you guys can understand and help me out a bit(we are still with no contact for 1 week)

06-24-2014, 03:44 AM
The mistake you made with this one is that you compared her boyfriend to a "dog" and called him "not real". This got her defensive because you indirectly insulted her. This of course gets her to take his side, also to reaffirm herself. If you would've put it in a way that he is "too nice" "very needy "etc. it would have been much better.

Besides 7 months can be serious and I would say it is solid. If you do ask her out, invite her along to somewhere where you are with your friends.

I agree with you taking a little break off and giving it a breather, this one needs air.

06-24-2014, 05:14 AM
Didn't think about that, however after i talked with her and through our brief interactions on whatsapp i didn't feel like she cared about what i said since i felt she liked when i approached her again and when i spoke with her again she came and sat next to me.

She's travelling now, i'm not sure if she is with her boyfriend or not but i'm thinking about sending her a message with something funny/cocky after 1 or 2 weeks like nothing happened then only talk with her after holidays or if she talks with me, i'm pretty sure she will be very surprised since the last message i sent her after i asked her out the answer was "what a miracle you talking to me rs" and was happy.

The good thing is after kind of getting rejected twice i can't bring myself to care anymore at least like i did, even though i'm capable of saying a lot of cocky lines with her this one was able to make me feel a bit nervous when i first approached her and i felt i was too focused on her because this one felt like a "challenge".

In the meantime i'm also growing a beard, getting a wrist watch, changing my hairstyle a bit and some other things which i'm sure will give me an impression a bit more mature and maybe even of a player thanks to the beard now, i'm not sure if she thinks that i'm one, my friends say i can be very daring when i try and with this one i had a lot of attitude.

I think it will be interessing how this one (very curious) and other girls will react after holiday and i will take your advice and give a little break with maybe sending a message like a said, which i'm not sure if it's a good or bad ideia yet.

06-26-2014, 01:00 PM
Any opinions about this situation would be appreciated even if it's to tell me that i'm being an idiot ;]

06-26-2014, 09:33 PM
Be her ''friend''----get in the friends zone---literally become this girl's friend, go as far as asking her if you could be friends (disqualify yourself HARD)-- come in under the radar---invite her out in person---GET HER TO TALK! ,but find what she likes to talk about and just go in whatever direction she takes it

ask her what its like to have the ''perfect relationship''= she'll tell you it is everything but perfect
at this point you ask ''why''- she'll give you all her bf's faults- exploit them

play shy guy game, but kino escalate

after 5-6 hrs of conversation, vibing, comulative time = isolate- kino to turn her on, escalate , pull.

06-27-2014, 04:33 AM
Even if i were to try it i'm not sure it would be possible cuz i just never felt like we ever had a "friendship" going on, mostly because when i started talking with her i tried to be more friendly but if i were to continue like that i felt i wouldn't get even in the friendzone(i dont know why), so with this one i had to tease a lot and come a bit stronger to make her come and talk to me and when i talked with her in person i got the feeling like i had all her attention even though she seemed not interested online at first, but it could be just me imagining things.

Besides this i've seen this one is or used to be a bit of a "tomboy" with her male friends and really talks a lot with her girl friends, but with me since i started talking with her i felt she was more closed and even after making her more comfortable with me this side of her didn't show often, she only became a bit more playful sometimes towards me.

One day when i sat next to her in class and when i was looking at my paper she was staring at me, when i stared back she hold for like 3s but didn't say anything and when i stared at her side but wasn't at her i could tell she got nervous. So i know she sometimes become nervous around me but i don't know how often or how much and when i didn't send a message or look at her for like 2 days she stared at me fixedly when i was distracted reading a book from what a friend of me told me.

When i first met her from looking at her eyes i felt she may be a bit interested so that's why i approached her and i think it may be the reason that i found so much resistance at first (she had a boyfriend and i didn't know).

06-27-2014, 04:44 AM
Srry double post if someone may pls delete this one