View Full Version : Working with ex

05-24-2014, 10:02 AM
Hey guys, so here's a little background. I should mention that I never wanted to get into a relationship with a co-worker because im not that type of guy that likes to shit where they eat (for lack of a better term).

This chick started working at my place (im in sales/advertising) and we had a connection. Similar personalities etc, it seemed like we didn't have to talk but there was a non-verbal connection. We hit it off, started texting hanging out etc. Kissed a couple times. Then i started getting a weird intuition vibe - so i started laying back.

One night we hung out and she mentioned that I needed to open up more, and that she's not used to being the one to crack the other partner out of their shell (im a naturally quiet/shy guy but have no problem gaming chicks that im not too interested in). After that we still hung out, went on dates etc.

Now we've been texting and 2 nights ago she texted that 'obviously your an awesome guy but as time progressed and we've gotten to know one another better it was more obvious that we just didn't have a connection. Our personalities are very similar to the point that we just didnt mesh well like that. i like spending time with you and talking but as to a relationship i just don't think its there'.

Now i know what i did wrong, i fell a bit too hard (it seems like i have no problem being funny / charming / flirty with girls that dont interest me but when a girl i like comes along i change my attitude < need advice on that as well) and i should have struck while the iron was hot (when we were texting sexual innuendo's etc).

But i wanted to find out, if i should talk to her and ask her how i should improve myself etc (im not trying to get her back, and in all honesty we are better as friends than relationship). Im looking at this as a positive learning experience but there is room for improvement.

Let me know guys! I appreciate it.

05-25-2014, 08:22 AM
She isn't really even your ex. Don't over-think this, just keep doing what you doing with other woman. If you try speak to her about things it looks needy and very insecure.

There is enough info on here and other places to better yourself, her opinion isn't that valuable - just let it be.

You can always have fun / experiment at a later stage with her, if you find attraction / opportunities arise again.

05-25-2014, 03:32 PM
thanks bro, appreciate it. Shes not my ex or anything, i just fell into the trap of putting expectations on myself considering this was the first girl ive found was on the 'same page' as me.

But yea, im going to keep it casual etc - if its meant to be it'll happen so im not going to try or force anything.

should i quit gaming her and talk to her like on of the dudes?

05-25-2014, 07:35 PM
Yes quit gaming her, just avoid discussing anything with her for the next few weeks, but don't make it an awkward situation where you're trying to avoid her.