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Random.Samurai
12-15-2005, 08:48 AM
Ok, I lied, these steps aren’t easy. I’d say they’re about medium-ish because they require some work.
This article is not for some of the newbies who’ve joined recently, specifically if they joined because of ‘The Game’. This isn’t a quick fix.
Disclaimer: I got a little heavy with the metaphors near the end because I didn’t want to use anything specific, so that readers can relate more easily. It’s also intentionally unfinished, because I don’t have a universal answer for everybody, and I want readers to really think about how they can finish this and make it their own. I’m not sorry for giving homework.
Another disclaimer: I thought this out while at work and was contemplating ‘The Game’ and ‘The Player Guide’. I am sorry for the shameless plugs.
Step One Choose a goal
When I first found this site, I thought ‘wow, I’m gonna completely shock everyone when I become this awesome player!’ Not so. If you consider what it takes to pick up girls, all you need are the right lines, the right clothes, the right timing. That’s all. That’s all it takes to lay a girl. All of that is provided in the Player Guide and various other collections of openers, routines, negs, etc.
But what about maintaining a relationship? Nobody’s life can be an endless stream of one-night stands; logistically because there aren’t enough girls in your area, unless you travel. And emotionally because…
I’m climbing out on a limb here and guessing that most ASF members looked for and found this forum because they were tired of hearing some version of the LJBF speech. What we wanted was to have a relationship with a girl, be it your secret oneitis or that cute girl you saw at the grocery store but didn’t have the balls to approach and say a simple ‘hello’.
Everybody would tell me that I’m a nice guy, just be myself, and that’s it. That was supposed to be the golden key to being popular with the ladies.
But I wasn’t. I just got a new oneitis every now and then to replace the old one after she LBJF’ed me.
I just wanted to get a girlfriend.
I would change my whole personality if necessary.
Step Two Practice Outer Game
After I found ASF, I sucked up knowledge like a Hoover or a drunken slut, choose your metaphor. But just knowing what you have to do isn’t necessarily going to change anything. It takes practice. Some take a few swings and they can hit any ball that comes their way; some, like me, need the tee to put the ball on. I can memorize lines and openers, but just knowing them won’t make me better at anything than KJ’ing. I went out, I failed.
And I failed, and failed, and failed, and failed, and hit.
Then talking to strangers wasn’t as bad as it used to be.
Getting a girl’s digits wasn’t a miracle anymore.
It wasn’t luck or a numbers game anymore.
By saying X after she says Y, then I can go for Z as a result.
All it takes is the right lines, the right clothes, the right timing.
The Player Guide says that the little meaningless conversations you have just to keep the silence at bay is called ‘fluff talk.’
What the hell are you supposed to fluff about when you run out of material?
Step Two and a Half Fail some more (Self explanatory)
Step Three Practice Inner Game
I wasn’t getting comfortable around women when I realized that I was always trying to let some canned material I found slip into my conversations. It wasn’t really trying to test something out, so much as a way to keep myself from screwing up. If you’ve ever felt that tension where you’re trying to think of what else you can say that you haven’t already, then you know what I’m talking about.
This can happen when you lose sight of your goal. My goal was to get a girlfriend, but I thought I had to change who I was to achieve that.
I forgot that everybody had kept telling me to ‘be myself’.
It’s not that being yourself will automatically guarantee making out with a girl an hour after meeting her, it’s that all your friends are your friends because they like the person they’re friends with.
A rock will always be a rock.
In the very beginning of ‘The Game’, Style says that his personality completely changed from when he started to learn about the Game to when he became a PUA, but I don’t think that’s true. I don’t think anyone who becomes successful with women after ASF will really have a changed personality.
The difference between a rock and a statue is presentation. A statue is still a hunk of hardened and cooled magma, but with all the unnecessary crap chiseled off. A rock has the potential to be a statue, but not if nobody takes the effort to chisel some crap off.
If you’ve ever had someone tell you to ‘just be yourself’ it’s because they like who you are already, but you just might not be cleaned up enough for public display. Just a diamond in the rough. Think about all the stuff available here or any other site, and a lot of it gives you blatant outer game, but the reason it’s hard to actually write out specific directions for maintaining inner game is because for each person it’s different.
You don’t really have to change anything about your personality; you just need to get rid of the crap that’s covering your personality. Yeah, you’ll seem different, but you didn’t change the rock you started with.
It really seems to me that inner game comes from a person’s true personality. It’s the part of a person where they are completely confident, where they can go balls to the wall for forever. I think everyone has inner game, it’s just covered by an assload of granite that only your friends who’ve taken the time to get to know you, see through.
Maybe you’re confident on the inside, but that’s covered by a lump of shyness. Chisel some away with the newbie mission, then get an EC tactic to chisel away some more. After using enough of the tools provided to chisel away the crap, all that’s left is the confidence.
Girls aren’t the same. They don’t like to work to get something beautiful. Give a girl a lump of gold, and she might like it just because it’s gold, but she’d rather have a ring; it’s less work to put on than taping a chunk of gold to their finger every day.
Just a personality hidden like that isn’t going to help anyone though. It needs to be harnessed. Manipulated, shaped, chiseled until all the stuff that repels women is gone and the only thing left is your best game, your statue. Outer game might distract your target from realizing that she went to a bed with a peacocked rock, but after the clothes are off, there you are, with all your imperfections and bulging lumps of stone that you don’t bother to get rid of on display. The difference between a social robot and a PUA is inner game.
Post-note: This was the post I said I was working on from this past weekend while I was at a strip club. I was watching girls come in bundled up in bulky winter clothes, and then backstage they transform into sculpted, shining examples of genetic excellence. They kinda act bitchy until they’re on the clock, when they take away all those personal problems and just leave their rendition of sexiness for you to enjoy.

evilgenius
12-17-2005, 01:20 PM
Well said.

porky
12-17-2005, 01:37 PM
niiice.....:)

Hypnovibe
12-17-2005, 01:56 PM
A good presentation combined with a solid inner game is the diamond....all the outer game is simply the polish.

porky
12-17-2005, 02:01 PM
would you say outer game is 'coky &funny' 'neg' openers etc... and inner game is just beingyourself and telling her about your life etc?

Hypnovibe
12-17-2005, 02:10 PM
Mystery says something to the effect of treating your emotions of fear or nervousness when you are about to approach a girl like a pebble in your shoe....you know its there but ignore it. That is a inner game technique.
Inner game as defined by Mystery and DD and a lot of other very notable experts is mostly mental and how you project yourself to others as well as yourself. Having very strong confidence, being comfortable in your own skin, and knowing that your not reliant on any given outcome. Its getting your head under control. Being able to get control of your emotions and not letting them get in the way. Presenting yourself as cool calm and laid back. Its accepting yourself for who you are and projecting yourself to the world with no worries. Techniques like reframing or simply having a saying that you say to yourself to pump you up or phase shifting are all specific inner game techniques. Its about expecting to succeed but not having your whole day ruined if you do not and moving to the next girl. When you are high on yourself ((confident not overly cocky)) than you project that to others nonverbally in your speech and body language. You think clearly and never run out of things to say....and if you do....its ok. People pick up on it. I am sure you have had a great day where it all goes your way and all the girls are checking you out...its because you were having a good day mentally and it was projecting outward to others. By developing your inner game you can call upon a good day or good moment....any time and any day.
Also in responce to this not being for newbies....I think (AS A NEWBIE) that one of the most important things for us to understand is that it all starts with inner game.

MacGyver
12-17-2005, 02:13 PM
Very nice although I think you are wrong on saying this write up
isn’t for newbie’s
I’ve been reading some stuff on inner game that seems similar to what you are
conveying. http://www.nlpweekly.com/
MacGyver

SunnyD
12-17-2005, 02:37 PM
Now that was a dissertation lol, I agree with a lot of the points and there's a few I don't but the jist of it is he's right use the techniques and pickups and everything else to set a foundation for your true self to be molded into a true PUA.

Solkanar
12-17-2005, 02:37 PM
Good article. I like the emphasis on practice, that seems to be what everyone is lacking these days.
[A Tip] - Knowing what Neg's are and knowing the 3-second rule DOES NOT make you a PUA or make you knowledgable in the ways of women, these are techniques. Knowing that you have hit a baseball hard to score a homerun dosn't make you ARod. You need to practice. Once again nice article.

shweeny666
12-17-2005, 03:47 PM
mystery says
'' keep doing what you've always done, and you'll keep getting what you've always gotten ''

Fader
03-01-2006, 07:16 AM
bump