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View Full Version : Feel like I am losing the window of opportunity. Please help with next step!



ltrtaf
08-2012-04, 02:35 PM
Hi all, on account of a few recent events, I have the feeling that the long fuse I like may be interested back in me.

We are in the same social circle (friends in common, see each other a lot, etc) and I havw always tried to play it safe before making a move.

However, last night I got the gut feeling that I am close to lose the window of opportunity with her and be catalogued in the "not interested/not gonna happen" zone, so I would like to make a next step asap.

Problem is that we won't be able to see each other in person for about 12-14 days, and I fear it may be already late. Also, I don't want to invest a lot/make a big move, so things doesn't get awkward with the group if things don't go as expected.

I plan on a coffe/walk meeting just the both of us, asked in a very casual way, as I just need a little but clear signal of interest before I can try to advance faster (I've tried to gauge interest via light kino, but our social circle revolves around dancing and it's risky to extract any conclusion based on this (we are used to a much higher/sexual level of kino with each other))

Should I ignore my gut feeling and wait till we both meet in person 2 weeks from now, or try to schedule something via text as soon as possible (2 days from now, so to speak)?

adaptordie
08-2012-04, 03:28 PM
i dont like the coffee walk idea...but thats just me, seems a little preplanned IMO..

12-14 days is a long time girls lose interest easily...might have to escalate via text message until than...

im in very similar position...if i make the big move and f-close, and things dont work out...makes for awkwardness in the social circle...

i tried to do this as well...HB goes on vacation today and i tried to make something happen last night and it didnt work out, got LBJF and LMR treatment...so read into how to fight those because as friends in a social circle it mighth happen..(i broke out all the PUA regulars for LBJF and LMR and still didnt close)....

version2
08-2012-06, 03:13 PM
As long you're not creepy or come unglued it's not going to be a big deal in your social circle at all. It's totally normal, your worries are in your head.

pcl81
08-2012-06, 03:34 PM
The thing that I have learned is with social circle even before I learned game was that if you feel that you are losing that window of opportunity you already have. This has happened to me soooo many times before game is ridiculous. My 20s was filled with these type of girls. I sucked so bad haha.

So making a move now will seal your fate because she has already put you in a "not going to happen thing". The 12-14 days off is actually a good thing. Let's you reset her view of you in her mind.

I would suggest you start over and do some attraction stuff next time you guys hang out. Dance with other girls in your social circle. Be playful with her and tease her. Then depending on her reaction escalate. You can even blame it on being drunk if things don't go well.

I would not suggest you do the meet up instantly. That is just sealing your fate in the LJBF zone.

ltrtaf
08-2012-07, 02:23 AM
The thing that I have learned is with social circle even before I learned game was that if you feel that you are losing that window of opportunity you already have. This has happened to me soooo many times before game is ridiculous. My 20s was filled with these type of girls. I sucked so bad haha.

I can relate a lot to your paragraph, as this is like the story of my life. It has happened me so many times that I have lost count. However, this time it is not that I feel I have lost the window of opportunity. What I feel is that I am beginning to lose the window of opportunity. I can already see the first symptoms and I know how the story ends if I do the same as always (which is nothing/just inaction). This is why I feel like doing a move as soon as possible (even though, it may already be late as you say).

My plan is to wait until the day she returns (which is on this weekend) to text her if she will go dancing. If she goes dancing, then in person, and in the first half hour if possible, see how is the mood, isolate and ask her for a meet up. If she rests, text her we won't see this weekend and ask her for a meetup on her free day.

We have know for a few months and things have gone very slow, so I think it's best playing safe at first. I'm thinking to suggest something with low pressure as coffee and walk/mall shopping/movie (any suggestion is well received).

If I end up being late or in the LJBF, at least I'll be able to advance with the other options (one of them has shown a lot of interest recently and I have been stalling/freezing the situation because they know each other (not in the same circle though) and I would like to try with this girl first).

rozer
08-2012-07, 09:46 AM
My harsh but honest opinion: you're overthinking it, which to me suggests that, unless this girl really, really likes you (and will thus forgive your fuckups), you are going to fuck it up. My prediction is unless you improve your general game you're going to keep fucking up, too, not just with this girl, but in every situation similar to this. Not judging you man, I overthink it and fuck it up all the time myself. (Why do you think I'm at a site called "theattractionforums.com"? lol)