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Sanctus
07-04-2012, 06:24 PM
So my family lives across the street from the beach and we walked over for fireworks at night. I surfed all day with my friend and little bro so my tan was looking good, I've been working out and I'm only 135lbs but I am actually really cut looking (believe it or not, I have no reason to brag to you, as you'll see in my other posts I'm very honest about my weak points, to the point of having bad inner game.)

So there were 6 girls walking down the beach, looked like college freshmen, all wearing the same outfit, all 8's or higher. Attention whores for sure but EVERY SINGLE GUY on the beach, (didn't have a whole lot of competition looks wise to be totally honest) were staring. They walked by our group and I was talking to a family member. They all said "Happy 4th!" at the same time and I just looked back and looked like it didn't even phase me, even though they knew they were hot. The next group and older dude, maybe 40's asked for a picture with them and they did.

My problem is yea I didn't fall in to the staring trap like every other dude but that's probably not as bad as not saying anything. I was with my family but what can you say to open up conversation with them. It'd have to be quick and maybe direct as they're all walking down together. It'd have to be appropriate enough to say in front of my parents but still sound mature.

(I'm 20, parents know I'm still a virgin and not social at all.)

I hear cat calls don't really show a lot of value (damn girl! oh my! ladies! etc)

What could you say? When they walked back by I held eye contact while I was working with my tripod (have a pretty badass camera btw) but I didn't really smile I just had a little happier than neutral face. Almost sly but probably shy looking to.

I don't know. I ALWAYS FREEZE UP and I NEVER TAKE CHANCES and I hate myself EVERY TIME afterwards but it still doesn't push me to say anything. I have a feeling it would have been easier if it was just me and friends but idk...


Any suggestions?
1. for just going for it 1 and
2. for good ways to open and build attraction really quick possibly for a number close in that situation.

I feel like if I would have went for it I would have had super high value just because no other guy had the guts to really go for anything other than "let's get a picture together".

Portrait
07-04-2012, 07:05 PM
If they said happy 4th of July, you could have easily said it back, and then transitioned into an opinion opener... I am sure you and your family have had some kind of opinion on something over the last day or two... Or you could have just made something up.

Girls - Happy 4th of July
You - Happy 4th of July... Actually, while you here, let me just grab your opinion on something.. bla bla bla

If their are 6 of them, just by being confident and opening them, odds are in your favour one of them will be attracted to you.

It can be difficult in a family setting, but also advantagious. You will come off as much less of a threat if you are surrounded by your family. Also, they are not likely to talk smack about you either, which can help alter with DHV.

If you are freezing up all the time when talking to women, then start doing it more and more often. Even if its just hired guns or whatever. Speak to everyone... Honestly, I have been shut down more times than I would care to admit, but its never been that bad. I have never felt like shit because a chick blew me out... I just though, LOL, I fucked that up - and open a new set... I only feel like shit when I fucking pussy out and dont open, or dont talk...

Sanctus
07-04-2012, 07:21 PM
Yea I don't even freeze up WHILE i'm talking to women... I freeze up and DON'T talk to women. and I know what you mean, people aren't usually hostile and it feels a LOT worse to pussy out than it does to get blown out but that anxiety I get is soooo bad right before it happens. Maybe next time I can go with my friend and take my camera and just get to know like 5-6 groups around us to get me in a talkative mood, and ask for pics for a portfolio, etc....

Portrait
07-04-2012, 08:45 PM
Having a few drinks and relaxing a bit helps a lot. If you are really having trouble talking to women. If you cant open, you can get a friend to open, and be his wingman. This still gets you in the social mood, and you get more comfortable talking.

Once you have started to wingman well, and feel more comfortable, then you can push you boundaries again, and start to approach. You will be approaching sets and getting good responses in no time.

I have friends that suffer massively from AA, even whilst drinking. They however make good wingmen, because they play the 'nice guy' card, and are really quiet interesting people. Also pushes up social proof when you start introducing people to eachother. So although you may not be great at approaching, or have even overcome your fear, dont let it stop you meeting women. Get a friend to introduce you. This will help both of you

Hank Havok
07-04-2012, 11:14 PM
know the name of whatever the popular well known strip club is there and simply say. "Hey are you the girls out promoting *&*&&*? I'd like some tickets if so!" You'll get a response that differs from the other guys for sure. What you do at that point is a way longer discussion but that's the best way to open a big set in that situation. Otherwise just get behind the other dominoes and prepare to fall.

Sanctus
07-05-2012, 03:28 AM
There isn't a strip club where I live. It's a small beach town. They were probably tourists anyways staying at one of the local condos.

Sanctus
07-05-2012, 03:49 AM
Not only that but I'm with my religious family. Not the best idea, even at 20 years old.

Charon2007
07-05-2012, 10:04 AM
Alright Bro you are struggling with the AA and opening sets because you have stuck in your head that they are higher value than you and you are worried that what you say will be transparent and they will see through it and realize you just want to F*** them. Which basically every guy wants to do.

What's helped me in the past is to start talking to every person you interact with:
buying stuff at the grocery store? Pick the check out line with a woman.
shopping for clothes at a store? find a female hired gun for advice.

basically start small and you will "calm down" so to speak, and get some practice being spontaneous with hired guns, remember they are likely bored as hell and will laugh at any joke attempt because most people ignore them all day. Even when you have to pay a toll bridge in your car, try to look ahead for one with a female cashier and then make some comment like "how many more hours ya got?" and lots of hourly workers will immediately tell you and it creates a connection because you understand they don't want to be there either. blah blah blah.

Yeah a six set of hotties walking by you is tough, role reversals is fun like accuse them of trying to sell something to you. Blow them out just to get practice.