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Mr RMo
12-10-2011, 03:32 AM
Hello Guys,

Last Tuesday i had a date with a girl. We ate at a restaurant and had a good time together. She let me know she would like to date another time, but since the date, she hasn't texted me. Neither did I, because i don't want to be an AFC.
Should I Text her, or just wait till she texts me?

Gr

Kassimnova1
12-10-2011, 04:18 AM
Leave her don`t linger on!, Your the prize here, not her, she should be lucky, lucky that you give her your time, sounds like bad advice, but believe me the more you the linger on the more you will keep worrying, wanting to text etc, asking AFC questions like "oh isit something I did" etc...Keep Gaming, move onto other chicks, you know she`s their, so don`t stop your ship from sailing just because you wish to wait on her, your a bizzy man, show her that you have a life, one that does not revolve around waiting for her lame ass text or excuse for not contacting you! , how did the date end? Presuming you K-closed right?

jrock83
12-10-2011, 06:10 AM
Wow kass sounds like you've got some pent up anger there..

Op, you've done well so far. Regardless how the fist date ended. I always slow burn girls so if you're looking for speed seduction move to other advice. I assume it was first date? What did you do? Just dinner? Did you do any physical escalation? Kiss close? All that's an aside but you've done the right thing giving her space. It's more common a girl won't text you first so you have to take the lead. You can text today or tomorrow and ask how week was. Do not ask her out yet. Wait until next week for that.

Mr RMo
12-10-2011, 09:28 AM
Hi Jrock:
It was indeed our first date. We talked a lot on the dinner, but not really physical escalation. Also no kiss close. I'm still a beginner ;) I thought, maybe on the second date (at the bios?) i could kino her for some physical escalation. So let's say, tomorrow i'll text her. Just start about her week? And more? Where NOT to talk about? How could i start physical escalation on the date (in the restaurant)?

P.S. This date was an exercise for me; this was my first date ever. I have some girlfriends, but just friendly. All i do now is for practise.

jrock83
12-10-2011, 12:27 PM
Definitely need to start escalating physically. Some good ideas on the forum for how to initiate that.

Keep the texts short. Don't go over 3-5 messages each. Just ask about her week and when she asks about yours insert a dhv. Then pull away unless she is really into the convo. Probably about Wednesday next week text to set up date.

Mr RMo
12-10-2011, 06:26 PM
Where can i find how to initiate physical escalation?

Meistro1
12-10-2011, 07:32 PM
I would text her. You're the man, you are supposed to take initiative. The thing about texting is you have literally hours to think of what to say, so you should make perfect comments to her, or at least consider it for a while. Throw in some sexual innuendos. You've been a nice guy so far but you want this girl romantically so hint that privately. Women are intensely sexual creatures they just don't want to display this trait publically.

Meistro1
12-10-2011, 07:36 PM
I wouldn't ask her about her week. I wouldn't ask her a question she's been asked a million times before. You aren't going to bore this girl into falling in love with her. I'd be happy, positive, engaging. Tease her. Anything but dull.

ideas :

"Look I know that you're dying to sleep with me already but I want you to know that I'm not easy... I've been used before" This said ironically but she won't know that so it will be dramatic as well. This might not be perfect because it's kind of long and melodramatic.
"It's too bad you're not here right now... I would totally [x do something like throw a snow ball at you, push you into this lake]" girls love drama and conflict is a classic example of it. If she responds 'huh' just ignore and keep on ploughing value. Don't give her more than 3 texts a day. Ask her to hang out again... don't buy her dinner do something that doesn't involve u paying moeny to be around her. If she says no keep texting w/o asking to hang out.

jrock83
12-10-2011, 08:47 PM
You only start the convo with the text asking about her week. Truth is you don't really care. You don't talk about how her week has been hell you don't even comment on it. If she's polite she'll answer and ask how your week was. You say good or whatever and insert your dhv. Snip the how's your week thread right there. Only respond a couple of more times and pull away. If she asks you a question it's a great time to pull away. It gives you a plausible reason to reopen later and says you're so unconcerned with her you don't feel the need to answer a question. You don't have to start it that way, it's just a method I've used time and time again. It's tried and true.

Specifically to sexual innuendos: I wouldn't do that yet because you haven't physically escalated yet. Also I don't start texting sexual stuff until after sex.

Mr RMo
12-11-2011, 02:20 AM
Thanks guys! I'm gonna try something! Just texted her about her week, don't really care ;). Jrock, what u mean by pull away?? (I'm dutch, my english is not very good).

@meistro: i don't know that girl that good. Just met her @ outgoing and had 1 date. Isn't it too much to text her already thoses texts? Do you have another example?

And where can i find about physical escalation? I can use that on next dates.

Mr RMo
12-11-2011, 04:54 AM
Can i Ask her what she thinks about the date last tuesday or not? Explanation plz

Roxo
12-11-2011, 05:16 AM
Dude, don't ask her about what she thought of the date. I may sound like a dick, but what matters is that you had a good time. You should be confident enough to know girls like hanging out with you, a confident man doesn't have to ask he simply knows.

Dinner is horrible for a first date. Going to the cinema is horrible as well, you don't get a chance to talk and it's not really a shared experience. Do something crazy. Heck, going bowling together is way better than going to the movies.

Tease her, bust her balls. Don't be afraid, you're the man, you're the leader. And please stop having these AFC thoughts and dates, it makes me cringe.

jrock83
12-11-2011, 05:33 AM
Pull away just means that you are the one to end the interaction.

Just check around the forum or search YouTube for videos of love drop and mystery. Love drop looks like a coke head but it's good stuff.

Don't ask about the date. Don't ever bring it up.

I don't know why dinner and a movie gets such hate from this community. I've used it effectively plenty of times. Go to some lowkey place to grub, see a funny movie, then to a bar for a couple of drinks. Kino escalate and talk at the bar. After a couple of drinks and good conversation you can get a kiss close pretty easily.

Roxo
12-11-2011, 06:33 AM
Jrock, it's very simple why it gets so much hate.

Movie: pick up is about shared experiences. Watching a movie (unless it's at your place and you can escalate without a problem) is a bad idea because 1) you can't really escalate and 2) it's not a shared experience. You watch without exchanging something, in other words: it doesn't create a strong connection.

Traditional style dinner: you're trapped in one place and it's difficult to do some serious kino with a table in-between you. You basically only have your conversation skills to work with, which is never a good idea especially when you're a beginner. Remember that girls love emotions over logical stuff? Conversation just puts too much emphasis on the logical side of human interaction. Bad idea!

jrock83
12-11-2011, 06:41 AM
Jrock, it's very simple why it gets so much hate.

Movie: pick up is about shared experiences. Watching a movie (unless it's at your place and you can escalate without a problem) is a bad idea because 1) you can't really escalate and 2) it's not a shared experience. You watch without exchanging something, in other words: it doesn't create a strong connection.

Traditional style dinner: you're trapped in one place and it's difficult to do some serious kino with a table in-between you. You basically only have your conversation skills to work with, which is never a good idea especially when you're a beginner. Remember that girls love emotions over logical stuff? Conversation just puts too much emphasis on the logical side of human interaction. Bad idea!

Agree to disagree I suppose. I don't see the point in changing something that workes time in and time out. Don't fix what ain't broke. I don't do it for every first date tho, but go ahead, keep hatin' I'll keep workin it.

Roxo
12-11-2011, 07:39 AM
Hahaha this isn't your thread man, this is Roeltje's. He went on a typical date, now he's in a situation he doesn't want to be in. I give him advice from my personal experience.

Maybe you're just a good conversationalist, that's possible. In that case a typical dinner date is possible, but when you're beginning you want to do as many foolproof things as possible, and going to the cinema and out for dinners isn't one of those things you can pull off easily.

Mr RMo
12-11-2011, 07:56 AM
So Roxo, where would you bring your date? Got some examples? You mentioned bowling, any more?
And i'm a beginner, that's why i got some AFC thoughts (never been really succesfull on love-side of life).

Where should you guys text about with her?

I think i got an explanation of why she didn't text me; Tuesday she got an exam. She might focus only on the exam.

And guys; i really appreciate the discuss going on here. It's really informative for me!

BetterThan
12-11-2011, 08:55 AM
You should've called or texted her two days later, if she didn't pick up, you should've sent another harmless text two days later. If there's no response after that, then you move on.

You don't wait for the woman to text you first after the first initial "date" with her. You're not being AFC if you text her first, just don't text her too soon, i.e. the same day or next day.

Mr RMo
12-11-2011, 09:19 AM
She was studying today, and i sended her: "Hi Nerd! Still studying, of already gave up" (Translated from Dutch). Good move or not?

Roxo
12-11-2011, 12:30 PM
That's an acceptable text. I'm also Dutch, so you can always PM me in Dutch if you find that easier.

As for first dates I prefer low investment (she only has to dedicate one hour/two hours to it), exciting things. I always prefer drinks over dinner for the first time, and be sure to take her to the coolest bar where they serve crazy cocktails for example or where the bartenders are nuts.

I know some advanced guys who take girls to art galleries or a museum, just to be different and more interesting than the rest.

driedfruit
12-11-2011, 04:48 PM
Lol all of these rules you guys have are funny.

Mr RMo
12-12-2011, 12:54 AM
Today she texted me: "Working today?". How to answer this? Cus i don't want a boring convo. :S

driedfruit
12-12-2011, 01:50 AM
You're over analyzing everything. Stop!

"Yes/No. Why, what's up?"

Snupas
12-12-2011, 02:16 AM
good first dates that build emotional connection and you dont have to talk much:
-Casino (awesome i tried few times already , probably will become my fav soon. Btw we only play machines and i dont lose more than R100 which is like 10 dollars so its cheap then you can bounce to another location for a drink or too.)

-roof of the building (guaranteed lay, just bring her there after 6pm when its becoming dark bring bottle of champagne with . expenses only bottle of the champagne oh and dont forget the blanket and glasses. Why champagne ? because wine will be treated like you trying to get her drunk, champagne is almost none alcoholic but girls get drunk on champagne way faster)

-ice-skating but you must have at least moderate skills to ice-skate . girls usually cant ice-skate so you will have physcal escalation while helping her to learn how to do it then go for drinks after the ice-skating

-house party/friends party (this is DHV,plus relaxed atmoshere , probably guaranteed lay same night if you play it right but first you need to make her comfortable at the party since she doesnt know anyone, once she knows everyone , her comfort will raise and she will feel less defensive will start drinking more)


-cooking together at your place is gold but you need include this question when you meet her or text her(can she cook? most of girls say yes) so you will ask her to show her cooking skills which she will agree to show since its a challenge in her eyes and not the date. Dont forget to make atmoshere romantic

-rock-climbing;bungee jumping;rafting,theme park anything with adrenaline , trust me if you will do bungee jumping with a girl and she never did it before she will remember you forever that feeling is impossible to forget!But you must jump before her so when she lands on the ground you can ask about her emotions , how she feels and etc

here are just some more: zoo, flavours park, any historic monument or monument with good view will do(if the date includes view bring the champagne), skiing,snowboarding,water skiing,paintball, dancing shows and etc
i can go endless with ideas.

Snupas
12-12-2011, 02:29 AM
with regards to texts you overanalyzing , if you dont know what to text then dont try to be creative and send something stupid , just send "hey missy, what trouble are you causing?" , another way to send open ended statements suchs "omg cant believe what i just did..."

jrock83
12-12-2011, 04:28 AM
Today she texted me: "Working today?". How to answer this? Cus i don't want a boring convo. :S

Just because she asks you a question doesn't mean you have to answer it. It's perfectly acceptable to take control of the frame and take it where you want. Also, she opened you.. That's a. Good thing! Roll with it!

Mr RMo
12-12-2011, 10:09 AM
I find it hard to build attraction by sms. Does some1 has some examples of senteces i can use, where i can build on?
Thanks.

tretimer
01-06-2012, 03:10 AM
Probably after the date she asks the same question to her friends, answer would be something like "if he doesn't text first, just let him jerk off" (believe me I've heard my girl friends say this to themselves after their first, even second dates. Now you're a man, you're supposed to lead, not follow