View Full Version : FUCK DATING (A Long Winded Examination of the Self)

09-08-2011, 06:04 PM
Haha, no donít worry this isnít a rant or complaining about anything. But I have been thinking a lot, and think Iíve been going about this all wrong. You see, I became single for the first time in a long time at the beginning of the summer. So I did what any sensible young man wants to do when heís single [and technically when heís not single too ;) ] and get lots of hot girls to engage in sexual congress with haha.

So I decided online dating would be my method (since the girls around me are NOT my style and I wanted to expand my horizons) So I got some new programs to study, some online ones and did a lot of work on my profiles and messages. Honestly, that part turned out to be easy. Iíve been on a lot of online dates over the summer, but now summer is winding down, and I am not pleased with my results. I feel like a lot of effort went nowhere. I did hook up with one new girl, and had a good number of make outs and multi dates, but nothing really stuck.

So now I look back and wonder, WTF!!! Gah I mean I got these girls to meet a complete stranger from the Internet, I mean am I not the man or what?

Well apparently not! So whatís the deal. I analyzed my routines, my kino, yada yada, and it all seemed like it should add up on paper, but what is the deal.

So I took a further step back, and looked beyond dating. I looked at me, and what I was like before my relationship started, and realized I am basically completely different from then, and not in a positive way. Back in 2008, I had just started getting in Game. I had a job, that while not paying great, paid my rent to live on my own, and I hung out with a lot of friends and had parties at my apt. I was also training for the FDNY and everything seemed awesome.

Now, whatís going on now? I am living at home while I finish my masters to become a teacher, and had been a full time student and now full time teacher (not getting paid too since itís part of my degree) so Iím broke. I donít go into the city enough, and just in general am what most would call Ė inactive (I donít need inert, I work out lol just, not very social)

Wow, itís hard to look at yourself sometimes. I mean, if Iím not impressed with myself, why would anyone else be?

But you know what, itís like rehab. Admitting there is a problem is the first step. Iím thinking hard about how to go about this, and have some good ideas on improving my life to becoming someone I really like again, like I was back when I got into Game.

Honestly, I canít afford to move out now. Iíll be teaching literally 50 hours a week for free, and I have 2 classes and their workloads. This is acceptable to me, I understand I need to complete this degree to get a new job in 2012 and be able to sustain myself again.

But in the meantime, there are other goals to meet. I think because I had been in a relationship so long, my body and brain were in a relationship frame. I kept thinking Ďjust get a new girl who is into you.í But Iíve been rereading a lot of basic material, and I remembered an important lesson.

Itís NOT just game. Itís SOCIAL GAME!

I need to make new friends, reinitiate old ones, just expand my social circle. Meet women not to find a new GF, but to just make friends and have fun. To Build on the idea of Entourage game, show pre selection, but more importantly, HAVE SOME GODDAM FUN!!!! Haha

That way, when this semester is over, and I get a new fulltime job and can afford to move into a hipper area by myself or with a roommate, I can deck the place out, and have hot women who will come back to my cool parties and be attracted to me. To make my social circles HUGE so I can have success I really want, instead of going on these crappy dates and work like a Try Hard to impress.

Patience, and hard work, thatís what I need. Iím at the end of this school stuff, and once itís done, then yes I can worry about results then. I should just be working on other things right now. On getting a rewarding career going which will fill my conversation with funny DHV stories, then on finding a awesome place and filling it with cool guys and hot women who like me and add to my life and I add to theirs!

Itís not going to be easy. I felt kind of down about it for awhile, pitying myself, thinking things were outside my control.

But now, I know the truth. Itís in my hands. I was handling it wrong before, but now Iím going to fix it.

Thanks for reading, and thank you in advance for any future advice or assistance you guys can offer. Youíre great, and I appreciate you.

09-09-2011, 09:26 AM
That's what it's all about. For anyone who's struggled a little this is a great reminder that a healthy dose of self examination, realism, and goal setting will go a long way towards improving your direction.