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QualityGame
09-07-2011, 10:48 PM
The PUA community says you can't do everything overnight.

Instead, you should set small goals for yourself, achieve them, then set more.

So RIGHT NOW, I'm asking YOU guys to help set some goals for me, because I'm stuck!

I don't drive, so I don't go out much unless it's with friends or with a chick (who's NOT an HB) who likes me. So "go out and do this" won't exactly work unless I'm already heading out.

But anything else, I'm game.

It can be anything from...

-Read a specific chapter from Magic Bullets
-Tell a girl (who doesn't know you feel this way) that you wanna fuck her.
-Study one of the many programs/ebooks I've either purchased or downloaded.
-Get online, find a girl, get her #, and actively try & meet/F-Close within a week.
-Text a girl from my phone for a meetup. If she declines, delete her and move on.

ANYTHING.

This all started after a somewhat heated debate with a female "friend" who, since I've known her, has had 2 guys she was super into (sexually AND emotionally -- one CURRENTLY) while I can barely get a TEXT from her (unless she needs advice)

Part of me is ready to tell her I wanna see/date/fuck etc. while the OTHER part of me knows it might be better to break off contact -- for a WHILE, then re-initiate when I am MUCH BETTER at pick up/seduction & have a better chance.

Anyway, without being assholes, give me your advice. (And hand out a goal.) Thank you.

I'll even post back with my progress.

Jack Greezy
09-07-2011, 10:57 PM
Just break off contact with her as you said. I don't recommend you telling her how you feel, just game.

QualityGame
09-07-2011, 10:59 PM
Just break off contact with her as you said. I don't recommend you telling her how you feel, just game.

At this point, I'm in one of those "I'll tell her I wanna fuck, and if she doesn't like it, I'll next her ass & keep goin" type of moods.

That's why I say that.

Now when you say cut off contact, do you mean FOREVER, for a few MONTHS or just until SHE initiates again?

Jack Greezy
09-07-2011, 11:05 PM
For however long you feel, but I prefer a week or so. Do other things in life and show her that you're not available. Since that's what you wanna do then you can tell her if you want. As you said, you don't care if you lose her.

QualityGame
09-07-2011, 11:10 PM
At this point, no. Who knows how I'll feel a week from now, or even in a few days.

I definitely was ready to lay it out there though. Partly because I WANTED an excuse to next her.

I mean, she wasn't being that great of a friend. (She even ADMITTED to being a shitty friend) So if I can't be physical with her EITHER, I may as WELL next her.

Fey
09-08-2011, 01:40 AM
You want goals, or thoughts on what to do with her?

For a goal, umn.. find a way for you to be able to go out more? Make enough money to buy a car, expand your social circle, find more friends who enjoy your company and thus willing to pick you up, etc.

Or, since you can't really go out, work out. Improve your posture, body language, tonality. More useful than re-reading PU materials if you can't go out and get feedback from being in field.
All this poo ah techniques and all are good stuff. But you also need to remember: the better your life is, (usually) the better the quality of your friends will be. -Thus more DHVs, more women to game, better clothes, better body, smarter and more interesting mind, etc..- if you have to think in terms of game

As for the 'friend'. I've always think that nexting is a waste. Simply bump her down to acquaintance. Stop giving her relationship advice and listening her to her complaints about guys. Text her once every week or two to see how she's doing and keep in touch. In the mean time, get on with your life, game other women.

bluefin
09-08-2011, 11:52 AM
As for the friend: Telling her you want to fuck her is not going to help your cause, neither is being her emotional tampon who she rants to when the guy she actually is fucking or thinking about fucking isn't treating her right. She probably already knows you want to fuck her if she's good looking. You need to slow or kill your contact with her, be more distant. Don't answer the phone / text her back right away, if at all. She's not that special.

As for goals:
You need to get more social. In person social is going to be better than online social so while it might be a good idea to set up an online dating profile at POF or okcupid or match or ___ site, don't make that your focus - but it would be good to get a little online socialization going for later evenings when you're home. As for "going out" you have to: live, shop, go to school, play sports, beach, travel, take the bus, eat, walk, exercise, whatever activity some place right? I mean you don't spend 24/7 locked in your room, do you?

Every time you leave the house there is an opportunity to: look your best, make eye contact, smile, have good body language (read up if you haven't), make friendly interactions (even if it's as simple as asking what time it is or what the best thing on the menu is), chat up a female, possibly # email or facebook close.

BetterThan
09-08-2011, 01:43 PM
Take your own advice. Don't tell her anything and break contact for awhile, even if she attempts to contact you.

Some goals to think about:

-WALK to a local public place (library, coffee shop, supermarket, etc.) and approach at least 5 women at least 3 days of the week.
-When you're out with friends, give one friend 20 dollars and each time you approach a girl, have him give you 5 dollars back (or anything along those lines, etc). That's thanks to "The Game" and it's a great way to stay motivated.
-Also, go to the mall and attempt to number close at least one girl a week.
-Start doing at home exercises and if you can, get to a gym and start lifting.
-Change your style of clothing, or at least buy one outfit and use it once a weekend (preferably a fashionable one).
-Old facebook friends? Catch up with them (women) and start making emotional connections/getting some "meet-ups" going.
-Pickup a Body Language book and start learning how to really, REALLY get in touch with understanding and utilizing body language.
-If you're not doing this already, keep great hyigene and always look your best when you're out in public.

I think that's an okay list to start with. Oh yeah, and get much, much better with women/get rid of approach anxiety.

This is most of the stuff I did anyway and it worked for me.

QualityGame
09-08-2011, 01:58 PM
Or, since you can't really go out, work out. Improve your posture, body language, tonality. More useful than re-reading PU materials if you can't go out and get feedback from being in field.
All this poo ah techniques and all are good stuff. But you also need to remember: the better your life is, (usually) the better the quality of your friends will be. -Thus more DHVs, more women to game, better clothes, better body, smarter and more interesting mind, etc..- if you have to think in terms of game

As for the 'friend'. I've always think that nexting is a waste. Simply bump her down to acquaintance. Stop giving her relationship advice and listening her to her complaints about guys. Text her once every week or two to see how she's doing and keep in touch. In the mean time, get on with your life, game other women.

This might be a good time for me to watch the "Beyond Words" DVD. You talk about body language (and I'm also clueless at doing proper kino. I feel awkward in my head when I think about it) so that DVD might help me.

As for giving her advice and listening to her rant, before I made this thread, she was telling me how she "didnt want me to think thats all I was good for", so she wouldn't do it anymore. So I can't even bump her down to acquaintance status because that's kind of what we are ALREADY. I'm not even sure she'd NOTICE if I stopped hitting her up, for two reasons:

1: I don't contact her that much anyway (maybe once every week or two)
2: She's too focused on her guy to even NOTICE whether or not we talk I'm sure.

I think the problem is, when I DO contact her, I mention the fact that I haven't heard from her, which is a BIG mistake.




You need to get more social. In person social is going to be better than online social so while it might be a good idea to set up an online dating profile at POF or okcupid or match or ___ site, don't make that your focus - but it would be good to get a little online socialization going for later evenings when you're home. As for "going out" you have to: live, shop, go to school, play sports, beach, travel, take the bus, eat, walk, exercise, whatever activity some place right? I mean you don't spend 24/7 locked in your room, do you?

Actually, most of my time IS spent at home. I don't go to school, the beach or play any sports.

The only time I go out to eat or to the mall or anything, like I said, is with a chick who is in love with me (and she's NOT an HB) so I can't game right in FRONT of her.

So, yeah. I pretty much DO spend most of my time at home.

As for online dating, I do have an account on both OKC and POF. In fact, it's where I meet most of my women.

I chat em up online, get their numbers, maybe text a couple times, then I let the #s go cold because I either stop texting, or don't push for a meetup.

The reasons I don't push for a meetup are:

1: I don't have my own place so I can't bring em here.
2: I don't have a car so I can't MEET em any place.
3: Some of them always have excuses or reasons why they "can't" hang out.

So, I've almost given up.

Now, that's not to say I HAVEN'T met up / F-Closed several girls from POF (I HAVE) but it doesn't happen as much as *I* think it should. And no matter how many I meet or close, I tend to focus more on the few who WON'T meet me more than I do my successes.

miaddict
09-08-2011, 01:59 PM
The PUA

I don't drive, so I don't go out much unless it's with friends or with a chick (who's NOT an HB) who likes me. So "go out and do this" won't exactly work unless I'm already heading out.

But anything else, I'm game.

It can be anything from...


I'll even post back with my progress.
1. Go out. No f*king excuses. No car? Take public transport. Take a cab. Find a wing. Organize a night out so that your friends can chauffeur you around.
2. Open 10 sets and go as far as you can. I don't care which program/method/guru you follow. You can include/exclude warm up sets in that number if you want.
3. Post a FR on TAF.
IMPORTANT: If you have not done the above within ONE WEEK, I will ban you FOR A MONTH from TAF. If you can go 2 or 3 times a week and do that, the better. No more excuses.

If you reply that you are not going to do it, I will ban you straight away. For life. I am sick of pol coming here for advice and then not implementing anything that others spend time posting.