View Full Version : girlfriend question

12-08-2010, 06:57 PM
Hello (first time posting here)
I am writing here because I want some advice on how to get a girlfriend. I am a 19 year old college freshman. I'm a decent looking guy, and very confident. It's not that I'm not able to get girls, it's that I'm only able to get into very superficial relationships (which often begin while drunk at frat parties).

So, there is this girl that I have a crush on, and I want to hook up with her and see where it goes. My only problem is that I truly want to do this without alcohol.

I've looked around some posts and I will provide some information which might be relevant:

I've read the game by Neil Strauss. I don't plan on reading any other "PUA" books...I'm convinced that the strategies work but I feel like it's not really necessary and I have no desire to be a "PUA"...I'm pretty content right now lol.

So I've always been a relatively popular, my High School group was well respected, and I have plenty of male and female friends in college. I have absolutely no trouble talking to people.

I tend to keep my superficial relationships separate from my female friends because I don't think they appreciate them, it's not really me to be honest.

So basically, with this girl that I have a crush on. I am currently friends with her and very good friends with her other two best friends (they always ask me advice on men lol) But I honestly don't konw how to do it. I don't just want to go to some frat party with her and try to drunkedly hook up with her because I truly care about her and don't want for her to think i'm just some superficial guy looking for sex. My best friend and I and her best friend and she usually do homework together in the library and eat lunch together and stuff.

I really don't know what to do? We go out for smoking breaks together from studying but other than that we don't really have any alone time together, and I honestly don't know how to hook up with a girl for the first time while sober. I am not even sure if she is even attracted to me or just likes me as a friend. The only thing I can think of is telling her best friend (we're good enough of friends where I think she might help me...but I'm honestly not completely sure how that would go) I feel relationships have been dumhumanized from how it was years ago where you would just simply ask a girl to the movies or w/e...it would just be so awkward to do that, she would consider it a friendly act I think.

So, in short, lol, how do I know if she is attracted to me? If not how do I get her attracted to me without drinking/partying? And how do I hook up with her for the first time?

Thank you all :)

Alpha Electro
12-08-2010, 09:22 PM
Read the materials and you will know.

No one is forcing you to identify yourself with the "PUA" label - we don't even do it ourselves. We consider ourselves as guys who have simply improved ourselves, and have gotten what we wanted out of life and in love/relationships.

So don't be lazy, pick up a copy of Magic Bullets, and read through it; all of the questions you have asked in here have already been answered in MB.

12-09-2010, 06:29 AM
@ A-electro Magic bullets wont help with a "Just friends problem".He doesnt want to meet new ppl,nor build comfort.He wants attraction-seduction.

Friendship means equal value plus comfort.Whatever you do,DO NOT TELL HER GIRLFRIENDS.Its a bad and frustrated move with absolutely no gain.I smell One-Itis disease here.

You can understand the attraction from just a look.Also,there is no such thing as "Friends" between two sexes.

The best way to proceed is at a party...positive disposition and high music-excuse for kino.Try to higher you value (gain respect and admire),as well as prove you have a very high social circle(Attraction) and you are a very likeable guy.

Dont seem needy.Despite the fact that you have feelings for her,act like you dont realy care.(Disqualify)

Go read Magic Bullets anyway for future use.We cant tell you what exactly to do.Check this video out,and find your self a way out.

Alpha Electro
12-09-2010, 02:50 PM
I never suggested MB to just help him with a "friends" problem. You even acknowledged yourself that he wants attraction and seduction - therefore, Magic Bullets is the book to read for him. At least for beginners.

He is just being lazy and wants the milk without buying the cow.

No excuses for behavior like that.

12-09-2010, 03:05 PM
Yes,he should read MB as i say later,but it cant help with "Just friends" problem.As you see i neither analyzed attraction nor seduction.Thats his work after all.

12-10-2010, 10:22 PM
Alpha Electro, I appreciate the concern (although presented a little harshly lol but truthfully) I picked up a copy of Magic Bullets. I am currently studying for finals so I will not have time to look at it for about a week. So please help me: I go home 6 days from now and so does she. we will not have time to go to a party because it is finals week.
Should I study with her? Or would that put us more in the friend zone? Should I maybe just ignore her until the end of the semester and pick up with this when I get back in a month?

Alpha Electro
12-10-2010, 10:43 PM
I would suggest that you go ahead with the studying together - it's an easy opportunity for you to bond with her over something that you both need to do (homework and studying).

While you study, I would advice that you just focus on studying most of the time, but do throw in some DHV stories from time to time, and do not act needy or anything. Be friendly and get her involved with you (high five her when she gets an answer right, or lightly pretend to punch her on the shoulder if she gets a question wrong, etc, etc...)

After doing this for a few days (I would assume that you can probably get a few study sessions in during the final six days) - you should have properly escalated on her physically, and you should have gotten all her contact info such as Facebook and phone #. Doing that will open an opportunity for you to remain in contact with her after the exams finish, and will allow you to further talk with her and build sexual tension.

12-11-2010, 07:03 AM
"After doing this for a few days (I would assume that you can probably get a few study session in during the final six days) - you should have properly escalated on her physically"
What exactly do you mean by escalated on her physically? like flirtatiously punching each other or w/e?

Alpha Electro
12-11-2010, 07:14 AM
Correct - physical touch, also known as kino. You should be doing lots of it. Here is some advice on kino for you: http://www.theattractionforums.com/newbie-discussion-forum/75579-i-need-help-kino.html

And here is a good guide (in a single post) by definition, which gives examples of sexual escalation for beginners (you will need to know this for later too): Sexual escalation guide for beginners (http://www.theattractionforums.com/phone-text-game/132492-girl-takes-forever-text-back-2.html#post791557)