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Discuss Q&A Session with Venture: Same Night Lays at the Venture within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Originally Posted by DAlex There are tons of scientific studies that indicate that women are ...
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    Quote Originally Posted by DAlex View Post
    There are tons of scientific studies that indicate that women are highly promiscuous around the time they are ovulating and this changes their entire behavior and what they find attractive. I've heard from other instructors that the key to getting a same night lay is in targeting these women. Do you agree with that at all?

    Check out the article in this month's psychology today for more info:

    http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201010/the-double-life-women
    Not at all. Whilst the studies may be accurate, how could you possibly know that they're close to ovulating without being some kind of weird creepy guy and asking them about it?
    I "target" (I hate that word in this context) girls that I think are attractive, period.
    That being said, whilst learning it is important to open as many girls as possible, including ones you're not so attracted too. We've all done our fair share of hog rolling in the past.


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    Quote Originally Posted by ScopedIn View Post
    I'm also curious about drinking and same night lays. Do you find drinking needs to be a part of the interaction? Girl ussually a bit tipsy?

    Thanks for doin this!
    Usually the girl will be tipsy when you pull them during the night, but it's not a requirement. Alcohol does obviously lower inhibitions and make it more likely that a girl will go home with you that night.
    That being said, I would never pull a girl that was really drunk, unless I was even more so and didn't notice her level of inebriation as I find it really off putting and unattractive.
    Essentially when you're pulling a Same Night Lay, you're just building large amounts of attraction, a little comfort and setting the right frame (cool, sexual, none desperate guy who's not looking for a relationship). Alcohol can help smooth the path but it doesn't have to factor in.
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    Hey Venture,

    For guys who aren't used to pulling girls and are inexperienced or unsuccessful, what would you say the best way is to build the mentality, gain temperance, and the confidence to pull SNLs?

    Thanks!
    If you recognize your tremendous power to be whatever you want to be, you will become the best person you can, and you will stop worrying about the person you fear you might be. - DeadEyeDick

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    Not at all. Whilst the studies may be accurate, how could you possibly know that they're close to ovulating without being some kind of weird creepy guy and asking them about it?
    Women at this stage put up some obvious signs, such as dressing more provocatively, dancing more, looking and acting more sexual and flirty. I didn't believe it at first myself until I started noticing it myself in field and it was actually mentioned in the that article as well in other studies I've come across. (In one apparently they went to a night club and measured the amount of skin revealed by a woman's outfit. They found ovulating women actually show more skin than women at other points in their menstrual cycle).

    I guess a simpler question would be, do the women who you typically have SNL's with exhibit more sexualized behaviors/attitudes than most women? Or is having a same night lay more dependent on the game you run rather than the woman's state at the time?
    "You're going to lower your value being afraid of imaginary zombies." - Adam Lyons

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    Fey
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    Thanks for the QnA Venture!

    How do you keep the mood, energy, and other things going when you're on the way to the seduction location? I'm having problems with this, especially since I'm usually driving.
    Think outside the box.. Or better yet, keep expanding yours

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    i ve noticed it many times...a girl will makeout with u the entire night at the club BUT WONT go home with u.

    is there anything u can do about it?

    or has the girl decided she just wanted to boost her self-worth and doesnt need to have sex?
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    Quote Originally Posted by DarthWayne View Post
    i ve noticed it many times...a girl will makeout with u the entire night at the club BUT WONT go home with u.

    is there anything u can do about it?

    or has the girl decided she just wanted to boost her self-worth and doesnt need to have sex?
    i second this, how do you know if a girl is just being a cocktease?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kamasutra117 View Post
    Hey Venture,

    For guys who aren't used to pulling girls and are inexperienced or unsuccessful, what would you say the best way is to build the mentality, gain temperance, and the confidence to pull SNLs?

    Thanks!
    Good question and one I answered for myself whilst getting good, so this answer will be direct from my own personal experience.

    Getting regular SNL's requires that you have a number of beliefs and ideas straight in your head.

    An abundance mentality
    This is probably the most important - get this one right and everything else tends to correct itself. However it's kind of a catch 22 situation. In order to develop a genuine abundance mentality you need an abundance of women, to get an abundance of women you typically need an abundance mentality.
    All is not lost; you can fake it till you make it: someone who has an abundance mentality doesn't care about the outcome of any given interaction, therefore stop caring about the outcome.


    Women want sex
    It's just that simple! Whilst it may seem like they have a lot of choice, and in a way they do (any girl, even the fattest ugliest women could realistically get more sex than any guy by just asking for it), women who don't screen potential sexual partners are deemed "sluts", are at risk of harm, pregnancy, and STD's, and lose social status. They are also often judged negatively by the very guys they have sex with which adds an extra element of risk, and in the past will likely have been dumped shortly after giving it up. Because of these and some other factors (including ending up with a guy who rings ten times a day and can't accept it was just a one night stand), women don't just take whatever is offered. Be the guy they can comfortably express their sexuality with, without judgement.


    Women are your playmates, not your opponents
    Ever wondered why it's so easy for some guys, and yet every other guy struggles to get the odd lay here and there? Itís like a little secret women have with guys who "get it". I look around a venue and see the hot women and it gets me excited. I know that I am in on their secret and that I can have fun with them and they can have fun with me. I understand them, I understand how the process works: the need for the bitch shield, the problem with nice guys, the natural hatred towards the sleazy guy, the need to protect their reputation, logistics, the need for plausible deniability and the requirement that as the man, it's up to me to make it happen. So, with that being said, don't think of sex as a prize that women hand out when you've jumped through their hoops, just understand that there is a need for women to screen. As a guy who understands this, you share in the secret and so can confidently pass the screening process.


    Be prepared to lose women
    SNL game can be high risk due to the tendency to escalate quickly and the need to create tension. If you can let go of the outcome, not care one way or the other whether you get blown out or not, you will get a lot more SNL's. This is especially true as you're learning. Understand that no one women is a special little snow flake, especially one you've just met and for every girl you lose, there are probably dozens more just as attractive in the same venue. Even when every molecule of your body is screaming with desire for the girl, understand that you don't need her.


    Own your sexual desire
    Be proud that you're a healthy, testosterone fuelled male, who loves fucking the shit out of women. Learn to have your sexuality bubbling under the surface and with it will come the ability to turn the tide so that women are chasing you for it. Being a sexual guy is nothing to be ashamed of.
    Which kind of guy is ashamed/embarrassed by his sexuality, a. The nice guy, or b. The sleazy guy?
    Most people when asked this will answer a, but it's a trick question. The answer is both. The only difference is that the sleazy guy acts on it anyway, but he does so in a way that attempts to mask the fact that he thinks it's wrong in some way. Being a man means having strong sexual desires, being a man means you go after the things you want in life, therefore being a man means taking control of and fulfilling your sexual desires, unapologetically. Be prepared to make strong statements of sexual intent, unashamedly.
    Biologically speaking, to procreate and spread our seed is the primary reason for our existence. More to the point, women love a guy who will fuck the shit out them which leads me nicely onto my next point:


    Learn to dominate
    ..and take control of the interaction. Women want a man, not a boy. Part of being a man is taking control of any given situation and a part of that in this context can be summed as follows; Women don't want to participate in their own seduction (credit Savoy). Further, if being needy and requiring validation from women is female kryptonite, then being comfortable taking charge and not needing the girl to explicitly state her interest or help make the decisions is chick crack. Dominate through your decision making process, dominate through your body language, dominate verbally, and dominate the people around you including her. Let her melt into your frame, assume the burden of the decision making process, let it rest on your ample broad shoulders and the only things that can mess it up for you are logistics, and YOU.


    Assume attraction, assume the close
    For two reasons:
    1. They will then follow. Being or acting congruent with someone who "gets it" is essential. Someone who understands the process and is comfortable around women understands that women do find multiple men attractive, just as we do women. A common misconception is that women are only ever attracted to a few select guys. Whilst they may not act on it, or verbalise it in the same way as us, women do have the same urges as us. Assume they have those urges towards you and suddenly a club full of hot women becomes a playground rather than a hostile environment.
    2. So you're not looking for overt sexual advances from her. Women will not be so explicit as to tell you anything, and in fact they will often tell you the opposite of what they want or intend. As someone learning the process you need to realise that women will often give very mixed signals, their words won't always match their actions. "I'll come back with you but I'm not doing anything" means they are likely intending to ride you all night. Their actions scream so loud in your ears you can't hear the words they're saying. By assuming sufficient attraction is there, and that the f-close is a given, you will do what's needed to get the girl back. If you wait until she gives you clear indications you'll be going home alone most of the time.



    I hope this helps. Inner game is such a huge subject and there are a lot of awesome classic writings here on The Attraction Forums should you wish to look further into this which I recommend you do. The above only really scratches the surface but I've highlighted the most relevant areas.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fey View Post
    Thanks for the QnA Venture!

    How do you keep the mood, energy, and other things going when you're on the way to the seduction location? I'm having problems with this, especially since I'm usually driving.
    Ensure you maintain control of the conversation, and keep the kino going. Don't allow the conversation to drop onto mundane topics, so either keep her state pumped with fun light hearted material, or do a little comfort building. Ideally you want to be talking about something either of you are incredibly passionate about.
    Don't allow silence. If you can't find anything to say put some tunes on that will keep her state up.
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    Quote Originally Posted by DarthWayne View Post
    i ve noticed it many times...a girl will makeout with u the entire night at the club BUT WONT go home with u.

    is there anything u can do about it?

    or has the girl decided she just wanted to boost her self-worth and doesnt need to have sex?
    Yeah, let go of the need to keep her by your side all night. When you're afraid to let her go you demonstrate the opposite of pre-selection.
    Practise capture, release, and then recapture. It creates tension, gives her the gift of missing you and shows her that you're a guy with an abundance mentality. A guy who rarely pulls would do what you're doing in hanging around her all night. A guy who has a lot of beautiful women in his life would rather hang out with his buddies and have a fun night talking to lots of people, essentially he can take her or leave her.
    Tell her you're going to go join your friends but that she's cool so she should come and see you again in a bit. When you do see her be really warm in your greeting. It creates the feeling that she has known you a long time and that the two of you have something going on.

    Some girls are cock teasers but few would spend a night making out with you just to do that. If you're getting to the point where she will spend the night making out with you but you're not getting her to come home with you, assuming you're asking her back at the end of the night, then you've either built no comfort, not got enough attraction, or set yourself up as a potential boyfriend.
    However, in most cases it's because she is assuming you're the same as every other guy in the bar. Whilst she is attracted to you, she is unsure of your intentions and doesn't know how you will judge her if she does sleep with you. To overcome this you need to adopt the mindsets outlined in my post above and be physically more dominant, create tension and fake drama, and set the right frame. See my earlier post on this thread in which I outlined a SNL blueprint with regards correct frame setting.
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