Discuss Are these real IOI's? at the Social Circle Game within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Are these real IOI's?
I am brand new to SCM and haven't even done cold ...
Are these real IOI's?
I am brand new to SCM and haven't even done cold approach yet. Recently I have lost a lot of weight and started peacocking. My friends who are girls keep complimenting me but I'm not sure if they're IOI's or if they're just being nice. I have no idea how to do kino and my self esteem is pretty low. Should I try something or wait?
Thanks for all the feedback you guys.
im also just starting out in SCM but i find it lot easier than cold approach to get started, but the thing i find so difficult is, you cant go all or nothing, you cant just kiss her and dont give a shit how she reacts to it. if you do that you can easily embarass yourself. but on the other hand you have to do it at a point if you dont want to land in LJBF zone, and dude believe me, thats one of the worst things that can happen to you.
it already happened to me and yes it really hurts when you put so much effort into that girl and make so much with her and in the end she just sees you as another guy friend. i mean its not bad to have girls just as friends if you dont want to have something more going on with em but if you want more its such a fuckin terrible feeling man. imagine you really start to like that girl cause you had much fun and really connected well but than dont get to the next level and dont kiss her and dont escalate, she will see you just as a friend and its really hard to get out of that frame.
so start escalate physically from the beginning so it wont seem weird if you suddenly start to touch her after 2 or 3 times you met and you didnt touch her.
just give her some friendly touch like lightly shoving or touch her back while she walks in front of you or on your side. and a really great thing is using physical escalation in combination with push/pull if know what that is. for example you tease her (the push) and and after teasing you give her a hug. you do 2 things in 1 with it, you realease the tension with the hug (the pull) and you escalate physically. and something great you can do after some seconds of hugging is: push her away softly and say, while smiling, thats all you get for the moment.
that works really great, but dont do it every 2 minutes or so haha.
hope it can help you a bit even im just starting out too, but i can see that im gettin better in it already.
if you want to know if something is a real IOI, observe the body language, more than the actual words
people dont lie with their body language
e.g pupil dilations, lips, tone of face, eye expressions, touching, preening etc
Try not too be too aggressive with social circle gaming. Social circle gaming is very much about patience. As said many times before, "Your social circle is no place to practice your game." Go out and get some cold approach under your belt.
Sure you don't want to get put in the LJBF zone right now, but you definitely don't want to be the creepy guy either. There are plenty of great posts in this forum about staying out of the friend zone; read them.
On another note, DON'T PEACOCK. It's absolutely ridiculous.
I would HIGHLY advise you to wait before making any moves. If you get good at this stuff and you work on your calibration, you'll know when the timing is right. It's going to take some patience, but I've learned this lesson the hard way. Good luck to ya.
great post DJPilot ! thanks
you're right. i just learned it the hard way too. or better said I'M LEARNING it the hard way RIGHT NOW -.-
i started with hitting a bit on one girl i met through a girl friend of me. everything was good but then i started writing her best girl friend and increased writing with that girl the more i thought its going in a wrong direction with the girl i first wrote.
then i met the other girl a few times everything seemed good. we had fun enjoyed the moments together but with both girls i made NO move -.- to be honest i didnt have the balls in the situations i could have done something to move the whole thing forward. i could kick my ass therefore !
but it seemed a bit like i was getting in LJBF zone with the second girl (the first girl got a boyfriend at that point) and the 3. best girl friend of the two girls WROTE ME on facebook and we increased contact. and i treated her a bit like "i like the other two more and want to rather hang out with them instead of you" feeling (i didnt say that)
but the more i did that and cancelled her, didnt respond and so on, there more she chased me. and after i thought it was going bad with the second girl and the more i learned about the third girl the more i liked her and we hung out 2 or 3 times and it seemed like i did the things right that i did wrong with the other 2. i felt great cause i saw it improving. but then one day i had really many chances to kiss her within 2 hours hangin out with her alone in my car. but i stopped and didnt do anything i fucked that up, but not in a way that i stopped while going in for the kiss. i fucked it up with doing nothing even if the tension was so fuckin high!
and now she doesnt chase me anymore. and so do the second girl. only the first girl writes me often. but nothing special bout that. -.-
i fucked it up with doing nothing. dont do that dude ! it really hurts .
remember: "failure weighs ounces. regret weighs tons."
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