Be Human; Avoid Perfection
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  1. #1

    Be Human; Avoid Perfection

    WARNING: This goes beyond simple pickup. If you are here to get routines and gimmicks, then you will not like the following post. However, if you are here to better your life, and discover all the ways in which you can be the best man you can be, then you may proceed.

    You are probably wondering what I’m talking about. So let’s get down to brass tax. We all have at least one thing (sometimes several) that we just hate about ourselves. It can be a lack of confidence, lack of ambition, physical imperfections, and any and all things you can think of. For me, it was always physical imperfections.

    Since I was 9 (sheesh, 11 years ago), I was an overweight, low self-esteem boy. What can I say, I love eating good food, and still do. As I discovered the community, my self-esteem skyrocketed, but I was still overweight. It was always a source of pain for my ego. I used to think that no woman in her right mind would want to see me naked. I couldn’t rationalize it away. Even in the movies, an overweight man could never pull the girl in the end. I tried several times to lose weight, most times lasting no longer than a few weeks, as I lost my commitment, and deemed my self to be forever overweight.

    After I started getting results, and started getting laid more, something happened that really put things into perspective for me. Sure the two girls who took up my offer to have sex in high school didn’t seem to mind, but I always kept my shirt on. However, as the notches on my belt increased, it really didn’t seem to be a problem with most girls. They didn’t care. I would lie in bed with a new hottie, both of us completely naked, and they didn’t shirk away from touching me, and kissing, and all that good stuff. It was around this time that I realized the topic that this post is about.

    I realized that my inner game was rock solid. Nothing can shake me. I am the shit, and I damn well know it. My outer game keeps getting better and better. My body language is impeccable. I realized that I had tailored my game around my imperfections. It worked to compensate my weight to the point that girls didn’t care. I also realized that if my body was chiseled, that I might be too perfect. I had learned how to play fat guy game, which is different from average weight guy game. I think that these guys can get away with more, do less, than us bigger guys who have to be spot on.

    Now to the meat and potatoes. There is no one in the entire world that is perfect. Even that HB10 with the dazzling personality; trust me, there are faults. But I’m going to ask you this. Would you really want a perfect woman? A woman who does everything the way you like: cooks you dinner (every food you love, every night), has amazing sex, rubs your feet when you get home from work, cleans and keeps your place spotless, dresses better than runway models, and is completely faithful, never even looking at other guys.

    This sounds a little intimidating to me. I would feel like I would have to be constantly on my game (as if you aren’t already). It would get old real fast. Now look at it this way, would you rather have the same girl, who, say, doesn’t rub your feet every night, dresses moderately nice, and say has a few faults (she snores, burps, etc). I would like this girl A LOT better.

    The reason why is that perfection is BORING!!!!!! Perfection leads to routine. Routine leads to boredom. Boredom breeds contempt. I don’t want a perfect girl. I want someone with a few flaws, as they seem more HUMAN.

    How do we define human? Someone with emotions, logic, intelligence, and a heartbeat? Someone who is constantly trying to define the meaning of life? Someone who is trying to get ahead, and become powerful? Whatever definition you can come up with, there is one thing in common: we don’t come out of our mothers perfect. We don’t die perfect. Life is a constant struggle to better ourselves. Think about it, if you were perfect at, say, juggling and you did it everyday, for an hour, for 20 years. By the end of this time, it’s going to be routine, and you will not take the same enjoyment out of it. You will probably even hate having to demonstrate it all the time. Think of television actors. If it’s one thing they hate more, is that when people recite lines to them from whatever television show they are from. This is because it is routine for them. IT IS BORING. However, this is nothing better than learning a new skill, and constantly trying to become better. It makes you feel alive. It makes you feel human.

    If I became chiseled, and started gaming normally, I probably wouldn’t have the same results as I did when I was overweight. Reason why: I would be coming on too strong. I could get away with saying less, but because it’s part of my game, I would still use certain routines that are not compatible with my body type. The result: the girl would feel uncomfortable with the new me. I would have to change my game in order to see the same results. A girl doesn’t want a perfect guy. Sure, that’s what she says, but we all know never to believe a woman when she says what she wants, or else none of us would be here. She would rather you be HUMAN, a guy with a few flaws, someone who is close to perfect, but not there. Because if you were perfect, you would drive her CRAZY. She wants you to have flaws to counterbalance her own flaws. This is the only way a serious relationship can work.

    What I’m asking you to do is not change yourself for anybody but you. If you want to look better, do it for yourself. Don’t try to be perfect for anyone, because being human is more beautiful. Having flaws means you are a human just like her, and she will love you that much more because of it. Strive to constantly better yourself; she will love your ambition. Strive to comfort her; she will love your thoughtfulness. Strive to be human, and avoid perfection; you will be unforgettable.

    *This post was influenced heavily by a great teacher named Pook. I wish to give him most credit for helping me to understand this subject.

  2. Great post. This is funny because this girl i know was just complaining that he BF was basically too perfect, and she says she has to try and meet up to his standards everyday or els she will feel bad about herself, because she doesnt deserve him. This really hits the nail on the head for why she was confused. She was basically asking the question, "why am i not in love with someone thats this perfect?" Now i can give a good answer to that.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    oklahoma city

    I agree with 90% of your post. IMO your inner game is always much much more important than canned routines. But as I am learning more every time I go out of my room I find that the bad qualities, both physical, and mentally tend to go away. I used to be the creepy stickly guy who stood alone at the wall cradling my beer, no matter where I was. I had no confidence in my self, I couldnt talk in front of people (even though my job required it from time to time), I was unwilling to do risky things, I was boring, I lived by the joy stick, I tried to escape life through t.v. or video games when there was so much more to live for outside my door!

    After watching the pick up artist, reading the game, as well as the routines manual, and many other things, as well as applying what I have learned (despite what ANY of my AFC friends ever say) every night, day, wherever I went, I slowly found that I was improving in many other areas as well. I worked out more (recently lost two inches! I need new pants! Woot!) and gained more muscle, I took more risks, I volunteered to speak in public more (Spoke in public today about my job, it was by far the best any one had seen, also embarrassed the guy who came up after me...he sucked). I played video games less and less every day (still do just when I so freaking tired I cant move). I read more, am currently taking salsa and guitar lessons. And due to events that have occurred to me, started creating goals not simply to gain women as I have in the past, but for my own self happiness. In creating a better, stronger, more proud me, women are able to see this, and are attracted. I am proud of who I am becoming, I can see the same thing from people around me too. They like the new me as well. I agree with you, perfect is not the best option, as I have found in women, perfect tends to act more like a robot. No, I've found in the girls I have liked, that there are flaws. Women are drawn to my flaws as well. But just because you have flaws, is no excuse to create a better you.

    My game evolves as I evolve.

    hmm...I like that, I think I'll use that...

  4. Well I wouldn't say AVOID perfection haha But I completely understand where you are coming from.

    It also gives the couple a goal. The goal that we all need in order to be good together. Have a similar goal. And that is to become better! You cant become better if you are perfect! Then again, perfection is not attainable.

    I laugh at people that say they are perfect in xyz thing. The day you start thinking you are perfect is the day you start loosing skill. Knowing that you will always learn and always grow will keep you strong forever.

  5. Solid post man

    I hate the word perfect. It's a rather depressing subject that you're always striving for the impossible, but what you're striving for wouldn't make you happy anyways. So why strive for it haha

    Success is a journey though, not a destination
    -Some guy I forgot

  6. #6

    Success is a journey though, not a destination
    -Some guy I forgot
    Nice, I like that.

    Thanks for the kind words, gang!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2007

    Actually me and my wing were talking about this. Not just for our imperfections but how we could create some drama. Most girls if not all need some drama. If not you are boring. If you are mr perfect you are intimidating and well drama free meaning girls will find you boring sooner or later and you ll just remind them how imperfect they are. So we always find something to create drama just a bit to keep them on their toes.

    Great post indeed.

  8. I missed this post. Great post and I fully agree. You should aim for perfection but know that one can never be perfect. Even Shakespeare's perfect characters like Macbeth had tragic flaws. If we were all perfect we wouldn't have gotten into the game in the first place. It was our imperfections that inspired us to better ourselves. Imperfections are needed to keep yourself motivated and inspired. Also, as you mentioned they are needed to keep the "drama" alive which girls love .

  9. #9

    I missed this post. Great post and I fully agree. You should aim for perfection but know that one can never be perfect. Even Shakespeare's perfect characters like Macbeth had tragic flaws. If we were all perfect we wouldn't have gotten into the game in the first place. It was our imperfections that inspired us to better ourselves. Imperfections are needed to keep yourself motivated and inspired. Also, as you mentioned they are needed to keep the "drama" alive which girls love .
    Budding P, you are quickly becoming one of my favorite posters on the forums. Thank you, thank you!

  10. #10

    Deep stuff; I like it.

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