Flakes, flakes, flakes... - Page 3

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  1. It's threads like this that make me hang around. Awesome stuff, Silverghost! Too many good points from too many posters to mention here, though I will say that I thought a lot of what Sagacity had to say was bang on.

    I personally never get bent out of shape if a girl flakes nor do I delete her number or whatever, and I just don't understand why so many do. I really don't.

    As has been said there are any number of reasons, both valid and not so much, why a girl might cancel. Why waste time trying to discern what that reason might be?

    The only justifiable reason to get upset IMO is if you'd already pre-arranged to spend a ton of cash (dinner reservations, pricey tickets to a concert, et al) on the evening and she bails. But why would you do that? Of course you wouldn't. No, this is just about hurt feelings IMO, and yes it sucks but you're a man now so you'll need to buck up your ideas and get over it pronto.

    It's been pointed out several times here and it's worth reitirating that if she really likes you, she really will make time. So get sharper, yes by all means, but remember, even a girl that wants to have like 10,000 of your babies can still flake on you just as easily (and inexplicably) as the girl that after she had a think about it wouldn't touch you with a barge pole.

    It happens. So tighten it up, don't worry so much, and for God's sake don't be cold or vindictive about it. B/c that's really unattractive and might well hurt your game elsewhere especially in the near term.



  2. #22
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    Thanks tipjar.

    My reason for deleting numbers sometimes is that logistics, state of mind, and so on will probably make you call again. And that wastes time, mental energy and all these could be put forth on getting a new number. At least thats how I see it.
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  3. #23
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender:
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    43
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    Ha... had a flake for dinner tonight... which is odd, cause she was all about it.
    And of course... especially the one from last week, which I can't seem to digest. She called me! Telling me I better call her for a weekend date, along with a text oh how much she loves me (after picking her up first time).
    hmmmm...
    it is all about personal responsibility though.... need to digest where I'm going wrong.

  4. 01-28-2011, 06:30 PM

    Reason
    junk post

  5. Had a HB 10 flake on me Saturday. I've been building attraction and comfort with her over the last 3 months. I found out she was in a relationship and trying to get out. Hung out with her in a group 2 other times(long fuse strategy). She broke up with the boyfriend a few weeks ago. I went for a dinner date and she accepted. Talked logistics with her about the date and where I was planning on taking her. She told "I am excited!" I texted her day of the date to confirm the time. She told me her brother was coming in town who she hasn't seen in a while and was going to take him out in the city. I said "No worries. Maybe some other time." She said "Ok that sounds good! How was the party that you went to?".... I didn't respond. I deleted her from BBM out of my phone so she will automatically know I deleted her from my phone.


    I am trying to figure out where I went wrong? I felt like my game through text was on point. The only thing I could think of is maybe it was TOO soon since she just broke up with her bf a few weeks ago, but if she really liked me she would have taken the date.

  6. 01-31-2011, 09:54 AM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  7. 01-31-2011, 02:49 PM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  8. 01-31-2011, 06:49 PM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  9. 01-31-2011, 08:03 PM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  10. 01-31-2011, 08:38 PM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  11. 02-01-2011, 02:47 PM

    Reason
    best of clean up

  12. Quote Originally Posted by Stillers06 View Post
    Had a HB 10 flake on me Saturday. I've been building attraction and comfort with her over the last 3 months. I found out she was in a relationship and trying to get out. Hung out with her in a group 2 other times(long fuse strategy). She broke up with the boyfriend a few weeks ago. I went for a dinner date and she accepted. Talked logistics with her about the date and where I was planning on taking her. She told "I am excited!" I texted her day of the date to confirm the time. She told me her brother was coming in town who she hasn't seen in a while and was going to take him out in the city. I said "No worries. Maybe some other time." She said "Ok that sounds good! How was the party that you went to?".... I didn't respond. I deleted her from BBM out of my phone so she will automatically know I deleted her from my phone.


    I am trying to figure out where I went wrong? I felt like my game through text was on point. The only thing I could think of is maybe it was TOO soon since she just broke up with her bf a few weeks ago, but if she really liked me she would have taken the date.
    Maybe her brother came in from out of town? Or maybe you weren't the only one on her post-break up list and a shinier prospect was available?

    Sent from my SPH-D700 using Tapatalk

  13. #26
    Join Date
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    To simplify, when a girl flakes on you, is the best move to:

    A) Reply with:
    "it was good meeting her but I have this pet peeve about flakey people. If a person doesnt value my time and they cant live up to their word I dont want em as friends. Take care and bye." -silverghost
    or
    B) Don't reply at all, delete her phone number off of your phone, etc. -sagacity

    ?

  14. Honestly, the flaking thing is something that gets on my nerves, I guess I'm way too sensitive but the best thing is idd to not show this and say i something like okay I understand.

    I even got flaked yesterday (and yes it still pisses me off today), acted like I was understanding etc... but I don't think it will go successfully due to various things I noticed. Anyways, only thing I can do is back off and only text her when she really puts some energy in her texts or if she even texts me again.

    Once I had a flake from a nice Girl I met on a Bus, she texted me she was very ill (they always seem to get very ill...hmmm ). And while I didn't believe shit I wrote her something like "Ooh too bad I was really excited to meet you blabla, take care blabla" (can't remember exactly what I said).
    And that text message was probably not the ideal pua text message that you'll find in books but it did work, because after that I didn't text her and she contacted me back a couple weeks later and I've met her and fucked her the same evening.

    Point is, and it's so counter-intuitive, even if you know for 95 percent it's bullshit, if you want to make this work with the girl you better show understanding for whatever might have happened to her, it would not surprise me that a girl who makes up an excuse thinks this way "Oh, I may not be ill but what if I was?!! This guy sounds so insecure and so cold, he's just a jerk!"

  15. Quote Originally Posted by Tryst Ten View Post
    To simplify, when a girl flakes on you, is the best move to:

    A) Reply with:
    "it was good meeting her but I have this pet peeve about flakey people. If a person doesnt value my time and they cant live up to their word I dont want em as friends. Take care and bye." -silverghost
    or
    B) Don't reply at all, delete her phone number off of your phone, etc. -sagacity

    ?

    I generally go for long fuse methodology but it never gave result since now. So u are absolutely right, this should be the main frame.

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