EX just won't let go

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  1. #1

    EX just won't let go

    After a 2 year relationship, I broke up with my girlfriend. We had great times together and she really truly loved me but I really didn't see a future together. Also I know I could do much better and I was just settling the whole time. I gamed and fucked some girls while I was with her but felt guilty and don't want to cheat every time feel like getting some new pussy. I also need to work on my game and it's just not the same when you're in a relationship. That gaming but not closing mentality just doesn't work for me.

    So here's the problem. I broke up with her 10 weeks ago, and since that time she's been calling me 20 times a day, texting 100 times a day, and now calling my job. I've given her the courtesy of explaining myself and making it clear I don't want to get back with her. Over and Over. She's just turned psycho. I'm truly considering getting a restraining order because its fucking with my job. And its honestly fuckin with my state of mind. I don't want to be mean because she's a nice thoughtful person, but I'm at the breaking point. Has anyone else dealt with a girl who's psychotic at this magnitude? Any suggestions?



  2. #2
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    Yes, I have dealt with that. You have to cut her out completely. No answering calls, no answering texts, no taking her calls at work. You'll be surprised how quickly she gives up.

    She may intermittently try to touch base after that when she's single, but you just have to cut her out.

    Do you work in an office? What type of work is she calling you at?
    When I am writing in red, it's as an Attraction Forums mod or admin. When I write in normal text, it's just me.

  3. #3

    I've tried ignoring the texts, and phone calls but her next course of action is calling my job. If its outside working hours, she ends up coming to my apartment and knocking on my window until she realizes I won't talk to her or let her in (I changed the locks). I'd hoped I wouldn't have to change my cell # since so many people have it, but I think I'm going to have to. But then she's going to just keep calling my job.

    I'm an IT guy and I've got my own office but no secretary and the calls go directly to my line with no caller ID. It's a college so if you google my name you'll find my # the internet in the college directory. Changing my extension is useless since they also have a dial by name directory. I'm going to change my cell #, hang up on her calls at work without speaking, and see what happens. Hopefully this shit will be done with and I can get on with things.

  4. #4
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    http://www.associatedcontent.com/art..._firmness.html

    This is a pretty good article. Note the point about not explaining things any more, not giving her any sort of even platonic attention (including conversation of any kind).
    When I am writing in red, it's as an Attraction Forums mod or admin. When I write in normal text, it's just me.

  5. #5
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    BTW, changing cell numbers is NBD with new phones that have mass texting. Just send a text to everybody in your address book "Wanderer's new cell# is xxx.xxx.xxxx. Please don't share it with anyone."
    When I am writing in red, it's as an Attraction Forums mod or admin. When I write in normal text, it's just me.

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by Vapor View Post
    http://www.associatedcontent.com/art..._firmness.html

    This is a pretty good article. Note the point about not explaining things any more, not giving her any sort of even platonic attention (including conversation of any kind).
    Thanks for that. It was a very helpful article. So I changed the cell # and am going down to Philly for the weekend for some "uninterrupted by psycho text message" partying. Hopefully when I get back to work next week she'll realize I really want zero contact and not call my job.

  7. #7

    update:

    So looking back at this thread I can't believe its been almost a month since I changed my cell #. Since I did that, she's been calling me relentlessly at work. 15 calls a day. I've been on vacation and out of the office until lately so I didn't notice how bad it was until the last 5 work days. I don't have caller ID so I have to pick up. I never speak to her, I simply hangup on her every time. I've emailed her threatening to contact her HR department (since she's calling from her job) to tell them that an employee of their company is using company resources to harass me and that it must stop. I also threatened getting the restraining order. She still shows up to my apartment out of the blue but luckily I'm never home or just sleeping. It's been 3 months since I broke up with her and can't believe this shit is still going on. I'm can't even begin to express how frustrated I am.

    Do you guys know of any other options at this point besides a restraining order? And I'd hate get in her trouble at work but her calling is seriously disrupting me and the co-workers who have to hear the phone ring and me hangup every time.

  8. #8

    I say do what you have to do. This is obviously not healthy for you. You're going to have to hurt someone's feelings even if you don't like it. I've done this many times and it sucks, but it gets the job done. I say start doing what you threatened, starting with calling her employer, then go from there. But don't do anything that would make you go out of your way or anything that would burden YOU. I guess what I'm trying to say is don't let her control your life style. An example is that you shouldn't have to make any detours to your apartment to avoid her.

    There's my 2 cents.

  9. #9
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    LOL. You threatened her and gave her no consequences. No wonder she doesn't take your theats seriously. It makes her only more willing to do so. Gosh! Be a man and do what you said you'd do! You could've ended this 3 months ago!

  10. #10

    Thanks for the LOL, nice touch. She does take the threats seriously, the problem is that she's soo far gone that she doesn't care if she gets fired or whatever. How would you suggest I could've gotten rid of her 3 months ago? By immediately getting a restraining order after breaking up with her? Restraining orders are no joke in the US. They're a serious matter and not issued on a whim. Especially when its the male thats asking for it. And it's going to be major pain in the ass for both of us since court appearances are required along with concrete evidence (witnesses, phone records , etc.) . This is why I'm asking if anyone who's been in this situation with some REAL experience has an alternative suggestion.

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