Alpha Male Lifestyle - Mixing with old AFC lifestyle

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  1. #1

    Alpha Male Lifestyle - Mixing with old AFC lifestyle

    So... I'm sitting here pondering a thought. The last few months I've really been getting into the whole PUA thing, and have finding myself become a different person. I used to be a complete AFC, and hung out with AFC friends. But I'm finding myself going through a transformation, as I'm sure we all are(did). But I have a thought I wanted to bring up for discussion...

    I'm transforming myself to become a PUA, and therefore more "ALPHA"... Doing all the things I read "ALPHA" should do... That is, not acknowledging unworthy comments, making people earn my respect, etc. But here's my problem: I've still been hanging with a group of friends I had in my AFC days. One of them in particular is driving me crazy! He is the most AFC guy you will meet... The type of guy that will cling onto a chick for saying hi. If he finds somebody who is interested (rare), he will basically ignore all of his friends and center his world around her. Well, he pissed me off because of this behavior and lost ALL of my respect. He is still in the group of friends, so I've been finding myself in his presence more than I have wanted. I have already chosen to no longer EVER make plans around him... But the part I am really having a hard time with is being social to him. Lately, I find myself not acknowleding him at all (even to the point of saying hi/bye). In fact, tonight I didn't introduce him to people I backward merged (didn't even introduce his equally clingy girlfriend). And since he is so AFC, I can see that he is trying to win my approval which is making him even more annoying! You know, going out of his way to laugh at my not-so-funny jokes, etc.

    I guess in summary... I feel like I'm being a "dick". Is this really the alpha male life? How do you guys deal with people like this? I guess what I'm saying is... I know I shouldn't be hanging with this guy, and I usually don't. But he does end up in the same social situations... But I have a very hard time being accepting and friendly to people I don't like. Is this incongruent with the golden rule? The whole do onto others thought. It's definitely a pride thing... But should I be putting it aside and be pleasant? Or should I hold my ground and be viewed as the asshole????

    Thoughts worth discussing?



  2. #2

    as a alpha male you can still learn to handle your 'old afc friends'.
    adjust your rules slightly to your situation but don't let your old afc friends hold you back.

    you can still keep 'connections on' with low energy input, you don't have to act like a dick. you don't have to be the badass, be the good guy and bring joy in the life of others, share your knowledge with your afc friends and be the leader of your group.

    if this advice doesn't apply to your situation

    leave your friends, move on, don't let anyone hold you back.

    start you journey

  3. [QUOTE=explorar;373325]as a alpha male you can still learn to handle your 'old afc friends'.
    adjust your rules slightly to your situation but don't let your old afc friends hold you back.

    you can still keep 'connections on' with low energy input, you don't have to act like a dick. you don't have to be the badass, be the good guy and bring joy in the life of others, share your knowledge with your afc friends and be the leader of your group.

    Ok advice I would say. But let me ask you this. Who are you if you set aside all this recently aquired charisma? Are these people really friends of yours? You can define yourself however you like. If you suddenly learned how to pull extreme amounts of cash instead of women would you separate yourself from all the middle income folks you know? I think there is some responsibility to truely becoming someone people admire and want to be around. You can't change them you can try to help them and it is anoing sometimes but you have the choice to be cool to people.

  4. #4

    You are what you are.

    I started making more money then my friends, and it showed, but now some of them are coming around and its cool for me to show them the ropes of a better income and the lifestyle it brings.
    I got rid of the people who became jealous, but my real friends, the true friends, i stick with them.

    Dont burn your bridges my friend, you may need to fall back on those friends some day.

    If this kid is truely a friend of yours, introduce him to the game, introduce him to what he could be achieving, and you may end up making a Wing that truely admires and appreciates you.

    The dude obviously has a void in his soul somewheres, making him like that, making him jump at any chick who says Hi, ect. He just needs some help.

  5. #5

    I appreciate the input... And you guys have good points. But I'd like to ponder a more general question regarding what we perceive as "alpha"...

    I've spent all of my life until now learning the golden rule... The whole do onto others thing. You guys even bring up the general theme in your replies...

    Is an "alpha" male nice and social with everybody he meets... Even people he isn't particularly fond of? Or does he shun those he deems not worthy?

    I actually care very little of what other people think of me. I don't care if they percieve me as a nice guy, or an a$$. But what I do care about is how I percieve myself. I know this could break out into a discussion on how my perception is my own realitly, blah, blah... I'm not interested in that. I only bring this point up because I don't care how people view me... I'm only being inquisitive into how others THINK an "alpha" male is percieved.

    So if you can imagine somebody you percieve as an alpha male (yourself, a buddy, a teacher, etc), how do you percieve that he treats beta males? Is he nice, respectful, etc? Or is it obvious he is above the beta??? If it's obvious, isn't this supplication in itself? Wouldn't he be supplicating to the perceived beta males by changing his behavior in order to reflect this?

    One more thought... How "loner" do you guys percieve alpha males to be? I mean, if he was to come across an idea he believed in... Because he is alpha he would pursue it... But if nobody else believed (for what ever reason - hypothetically), wouldn't he be a loner in the absolute sense. In which case there is no alpha/beta? And if he decided not to purse this course of action due to these reasons, he would be beta for supplicating to general opinion???

  6. I think you are placing to much emphisis on being alpha. The person I model for my life is so powerful not because he claimed a rightful place apart and above others, but because he sacrificed his life for people who he loved. Do you think that is supplicating. There is greatness in humility. You keep mentioning the golden rule. There is another thing that goes along with it. That is to stay true to the beliefs you know are true in your heart with everything you've got.

  7. #7
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    Dude I think you're taking this WAY too seriously.

    This "friend" of yours...is he a good friend? Like is he a good friend to YOU? Do you guys get along, have fun hanging out, etc etc? WHY shouldn't you be hanging out with him? He's your friend. Because he's not good with girls, you gotta toss him to the curb? In my opinion, that's a pretty ignorant way of looking at things.

    Being "ALPHA" is bullshit. It's fuckin dumb and basically puts a label on "cool" people. Guess what, by definition I'm "ALPHA" as fuck, and everybody knows it. But you know what makes it even more effective? BEING FRIENDS WITH EVERYBODY. If you're really insecure enough about yourself to make sure you're calculating every little thing you do in order to fit into some bullshit mold created by other people, maybe you should take into consideration the fact that popularity really helps your social standing, considering they're pretty much the same thing.

    Life is about accepting people for who they are, not what they can do for you. Who gives a fuck if you're friend isn't good with girls? I have plenty of friends who are NOT good with girls, and plenty who are. We all hang out just the same, that's what friends do. Sure, if there's a specific situation where I gotta bring a certain guy along to hang out with some chicks, I know who I'm gonna call, but that doesn't make anyone else less of a friend. Sturbo touched upon this point too.

    If being "alpha" is breaking up your social circle, I really think you need to look at things differently. Also, if you don't like him that's fine, but life is about coping with all situations that come your way. LIFE, not GAME. LIFE is REAL.

    And no offense, but you're 30 years old, don't go breaking apart shit at that age for the sake of getting pussy, it's hardly worth it, focus on more important things in life than becoming "alpha".

    Alpha, beta, kappa, phi, a man is a man.

  8. Quote Originally Posted by _Hollywood_ View Post

    This "friend" of yours...is he a good friend? Like is he a good friend to YOU? Do you guys get along, have fun hanging out, etc etc? WHY shouldn't you be hanging out with him? He's your friend. Because he's not good with girls, you gotta toss him to the curb? In my opinion, that's a pretty ignorant way of looking at things.



    Life is about accepting people for who they are, not what they can do for you.



    And no offense, but you're 30 years old, don't go breaking apart shit at that age for the sake of getting pussy, it's hardly worth it, focus on more important things in life than becoming "alpha".
    There are good points here. I think its ok to use the "things" you have available to you to move your life in a desired direction but not the people.
    Use things, love people.

  9. #9
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    When you think of school, the most popular person is usually the guy who is nice to everyone, but not necessarily friends with everyone.

    They have their own social group, the people they hang out with etc, but they don't act like assholes to people outside of that group. The don't invite them into the group either, as they may not have enough value, but they don't let the people outside the group know that. It's the type of person you talk to 'n think "damn, he's cool as hell", even if you're not really friends with that person.

    That's truly alpha.

  10. #10
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    the alpha man analogy is a bit over played. Be a man of respect, class, integrity and dignity.

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