relationship help

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  1. #1

    relationship help

    Hey there. I am new to the forum and I know that I am in the right place for great tips and help. Here is my story. I have a real tendency to Fuck up with girls when it gets to a certain point. I push too hard and end up scaring them away.

    So just recently I started hanging out with this girl I went to grade school with a while back. we didn't go to the same HS but we ended up meeting up again at the end of last summer. At this time she had a BF. (thats over after 2.5 years and she has been done with him for 2 months, and is completely over him!) so anyways, we hung out recently before thanksgiving, getting sushi and watching a movie while smoking hookah at her and my friends house. (My best friend happens to be dating her friend who I also went to grade school with.. its weird but fun)

    we got along great and I realized that I started to like her. I went to SF for thanksgiving while she stayed in SD with her family. I ended up calling her on saturday and found out she goes back to school in Santa Barbra sunday at 9. I came up with the idea to pick her up and get coffee in the morning before i brought her back home. So we ended up going and getting coffee and had a great conversation. Lots of small talk and also had those few pauses in the convo when we would hold eye contact for awhile (I could have kissed-closed, but I didn't) so i took her back home and then sent her a text later in the day. joking around, I sent her a text telling her to not forget about with me with all those SB guys running around. she sent me this in response "Forget about you? How could I forget about you, when you have become such a huge part of my life over the past couple of months.. You are awesome and you are also such a rare guy" I took this as a great compliment and sent her back "Thanks, I feel the same way. You are nothing short of awesome. I will def. miss you" AND that was that.

    so I pretty much can't stop thinking about her which is weird. I want to call her regularly but I don't want to seem so obsessive about it. I plan on calling her once a week on the same day each week until I see her again on the 23rd of Dec. I figgure it gives her something to look forward to. What do you guys think?

    Sorry for the long story, but it lets you know what I am feeling!

    thanks



  2. #2

    PS: this does include plenty of messages back and forth on facebook, AND a 5 hour jacuzzi/pool time after we hung out in the summer with my friend and his soon to be gf... it was a reunion that worked well for them.

  3. #3

    She is moving far away from you ?
    how old are you two?

  4. #4

    well we are young... i am 19 and she is also 19... she lives in SD where I live, but she is going to school in UCSB... i know long distance are tough but i could make it work. SB is only like 3 hours away from SD and i could definately take a weekend out of each month to be with her

  5. #5

    I dont think its worth the trouble, guys will be hitting on her all the time there and she will eventually fuck somebody else and all will be tears.
    Plus, you should invest that time in meeting local chicks...
    This long distance thing rarely works but people keep trying because they always thing that they can do it.

    In the end is your call, make a little list of the pros and cons, and make your decision base on that.
    Or you could see her once a month and still b with other chicks, since there's a good chance she will meet somebody.

    Let me tell you, I'vent been in a relationship longer then 3 weeks so I'm not your best bet here..lol

  6. #6

    you do have an excellent point. I have a hard enough time with keeping a relationship at all. I rarely get a second date, because I screw up too much.

  7. #7

    and you know why? because as much as you try to show that your not needy...when you have 1 option and you are afraid of losing it, there's no fucking you can fake that you dont care...chicks will be atracted to you when they know there's more women after you, go out more and meet more people, you will eventually get a great girl friend and you will be the one deciding to end if you want to.

  8. #8

    I plan on calling her once a week on the same day each week until I see her again on the 23rd of Dec

    Do not do this. Its stalker logic. Even if its weekly phone calls. Even if a platinum blonde stripper called me every week for the next three weeks I would grow tired of it. Just wait until the 23rd. You'll see her again.

  9. Hey sounds like an interesting and actually positive situation.

    I agree with Vulture about the calling schedule, definitely do not do that. If you feel like calling her, then call her. Be spontaneous, but don't go all nuts.

    Also, on December 23rd it's time to enact the 7-hour rule. Don't let her go back to UCSB without going for the kiss-close, or you may very well become the wonderful friend.

  10. #10

    Another add on here.... Your getting oneitits because you feel you have made a investment in this relationship. IMO i would just surround yourself with HB's and you will get over it

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