Where did I go wrong

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  1. Where did I go wrong

    Hello,

    I've started talking to this girl online and we hit it off pretty well - there was instant 'chemistry', if you will.

    The first time we talked for 8 hours straight and we talked about random things and life in general. She added me as a friend on the chat.

    The second time (2 days later) I joined the chat and I was the one to initiate conversation with her and I immediately became overly eager in my responses to her. The more our conversation developed, the more I looked like a rabid dog; I just couldn't stop talking (mainly about myself). At one point I offered to go easy on her and not talk so much about myself, to which she agreed because she was tired.

    The conversation went on and I kept talking more and more about myself up to a point where we started discussing love and relationships. It is then that I told her I'm very conservative, yet a little bit liberal. The latter did not seem to have effect on her. I continue to try hard and persuade her but.. at one point she even found it distasteful and boldly said I wasn't impressing her, to which I shut down and she shut down. The conversation died.

    10 minutes later, she asks me to go to the global chat room. What do I see there? She, chatting up some dude (I know what I see). I think she was trying to make me jealous. I just told her after a while of silence and uninterested chatter from my part. She gave me a friend-zony bye and so did I.

    I think I got friend-zoned. Where did I go wrong?

    Here's my perspective:

    * I was overly eager and I turned her off with that. Never be overly eager, especially at the beginning

    * I was trying to prove myself to her all the time, while it should have been her to prove herself to me

    Your 2 cents?



  2. Doesn't sound like the right type of girl for you, bro! That's a huge red flag when she's talking to more than one guy. Yes, it may have been early, but most girls who will concentrate on 1 guy at a time are better keeps.







    QUOTE=IdontUnderstandWomen;1050498]Hello,


    I've started talking to this girl online and we hit it off pretty well - there was instant 'chemistry', if you will.

    The first time we talked for 8 hours straight and we talked about random things and life in general. She added me as a friend on the chat.

    The second time (2 days later) I joined the chat and I was the one to initiate conversation with her and I immediately became overly eager in my responses to her. The more our conversation developed, the more I looked like a rabid dog; I just couldn't stop talking (mainly about myself). At one point I offered to go easy on her and not talk so much about myself, to which she agreed because she was tired.

    The conversation went on and I kept talking more and more about myself up to a point where we started discussing love and relationships. It is then that I told her I'm very conservative, yet a little bit liberal. The latter did not seem to have effect on her. I continue to try hard and persuade her but.. at one point she even found it distasteful and boldly said I wasn't impressing her, to which I shut down and she shut down. The conversation died.

    10 minutes later, she asks me to go to the global chat room. What do I see there? She, chatting up some dude (I know what I see). I think she was trying to make me jealous. I just told her after a while of silence and uninterested chatter from my part. She gave me a friend-zony bye and so did I.

    I think I got friend-zoned. Where did I go wrong?

    Here's my perspective:

    * I was overly eager and I turned her off with that. Never be overly eager, especially at the beginning

    * I was trying to prove myself to her all the time, while it should have been her to prove herself to me

    Your 2 cents?[/QUOTE]

  3. #3

    8 hours is a very long time to chat with someone and can run out of things to say. It's good to leave them wanting more so they want to really meet you in person as soon as possible. She won't care about money if you got her hooked - the flight and hotel's pretty much booked when that happens.

    I usually give this from a 3 week to a 3 month window, and make sure we've talked (or Face Timed or Skyped) on the phone, so when we finally meet, we have already built rapport, but I still don't know if there's anyone in her life while we've been back and forth in online world.

    Getting into love/relationship banter is questionable even though it can reveal a lot in what she's looking for.

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