Pushing Boundaries in Day Game

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  1. Pushing Boundaries in Day Game

    Something I struggle with at day game is that I still don't quite have the entitlement it requires to push boundaries above and beyond what it takes to just approach girls. For example, I knew a guy that would stop girls even when they're on the phone and tell them to call whoever it was back in 5 minutes or whatever so he could chat them up. So that would be an example of something I would struggle to do.

    Another example that I want to focus on would be today, for example, I approached an attractive woman who was obviously charmed by my approach and even said I had courage, etc. and she gave me her number as well although she was not staying around in town, in fact this was her last day so today was my only chance to make something happen. I tried to get her to insta-date but she said she was in a rush to get packing or whatever, so I said good-bye to her - my first instance where I did not show entitlement, because I could have pressed harder to get past some of the resistance, or to see if the resistance was genuine rather but didn't.

    Then I saw her again as I was walking towards the cafe I had already planned to go to - second mistake, because if I'd stayed around and asked more questions, I'd have found out we were going the same way anyway and could have talked for longer. I started freaking out, thinking she might think I was following her or something but then decided that rather than hang back and be socially awkward so she didn't see me, I would approach her a second time and make a joke about it - "hey, stop following me!" I said when I caught her attention. She laughed and said "who is following who?" So then we talked a little bit longer and she asked where I was going so I pointed to the coffee shop.

    I asked her again if she wanted to join me but she said no because she was in a rush - she only had an hour to pack her things. I started walking ahead of her because I'm overthinking things and then she speeds up and catches me up and jokes that she is in a rush but I am walking faster. So I think this was my third mistake because I should have called her out and pressed harder, e.g. joked that she was not really in a rush so she should hang around with me some more. What I did instead was say goodbye for a second time then I leaved her. The thing is these ideas do not always come to me at the time and then I kick myself later for it when they come to me with hindsight. Now I have her number but most likely she will not correspond because there was not enough persistence and I only really had that short window of opportunity to make things happen (unless she is in town again but most girls are too busy or whatever to message back and usually don't bother, so it's wasted effort getting their number, etc.)

    So my question is, how can I develop the entitlement / confidence that is required to seize push past these kinds of barriers I mentioned in day game. I usually don't do these kinds of things because I don't want to mess it up then come across as creepy.



  2. #2

    There is a bit of a fine line between pushing harder and being borderline creepy. Calibration is key.
    As for having the confidence or sense of entitlement to push.....just do a few approaches where you have the mindset of blowing it out of the water. For these you don't care about results or actually hooking her, just focus on pushing your personal boundary (and hers) as far as you can. Push out of your comfort zone.

  3. #3

    Once you've done it a few times, you will have set a new threshold for yourself and you'll feel more comfortable pushing harder.

  4. Quote Originally Posted by TailsPUA View Post
    There is a bit of a fine line between pushing harder and being borderline creepy. Calibration is key.
    As for having the confidence or sense of entitlement to push.....just do a few approaches where you have the mindset of blowing it out of the water. For these you don't care about results or actually hooking her, just focus on pushing your personal boundary (and hers) as far as you can. Push out of your comfort zone.
    That's a good point. I get worried about what to do if she actually starts trying to sleep with me and she is someone that I am not actually invested in, though. Also, this bypasses the confidence issue but doesn't necessarily bypass the issue about being creepy...

  5. It's helped me to consciously push too hard. For instance, give yourself the standing order to not accept a rejection until five "no's"; do this for a month, then you'll be better calibrated.

    Same with kissing. I got over my hesitation by always going for a kiss in the first 15 minutes of a date. It scared some girls off but it got me more comfortable with being on the edges of appropriateness.

  6. Quote Originally Posted by ApproachEverything View Post
    It's helped me to consciously push too hard. For instance, give yourself the standing order to not accept a rejection until five "no's"; do this for a month, then you'll be better calibrated.
    What about if you get labelled a creep during this process?

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