Getting women 40+ is so easy it's almost sad

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  1. Getting women 40+ is so easy it's almost sad

    I'll just go out and say this. If you're a single, unattached guy in your 30s and you're in relatively good shape, still have hair, career is good, and dress reasonably well and if you have a hobby or two, getting women 40 and older is so easy, it's unbelievable.

    When I say it's "easy", I don't mean there's no effort. But from the perspective of a guy who spent his 20s and early 30's going after young, attractive women and went through the brutal rejections and spending all that time and money and all he got in return was a date or two before being gradually ghosted, it's pretty damn easy.

    Women in this demographic make it easy for you. They give signals and show their interest right away. And when you do talk to them, they're very eager and enthusiastic. There's no grey area. And not all of these women are unattractive either. In fact, that's kinda what I wanted to talk about in this thread.

    Some of the women in this demographic I'm talking about are accomplished, successful women with money and good careers. Their physical shape is still great especially given the fact that they've had one or two children at this point. They are confident too and that's why it's easy to get with them because they show interest directly. I think they've been through enough experiences in their life that they just don't bother with the coyness.

    A lot of this is to do with what's available in their dating pool. Most men in their age group who are still available for dating are overweight and balding. The good ones are either married or not single for very long or just have no interest in long-term relationships. And some are experiencing mid-life career crisis and have just plainly lost confidence in themselves.

    So when they see a relatively young guy who still has a decent body and a head full of hair, has no kids, and his career is still good and he loves playing guitar or some other artistic hobby, they just can't help but be drawn to him. I'm not talking about myself here. Plenty of guys fit this profile.

    One of the women who fit this demographic I am good friends with. We have a casual relationship. We hookup occasionally but we also spend time together just talking over coffee. She has two kids from a prior marriage. She has a PhD and is doing well for herself and her kids. She still looks great and fit and is very active. She's 42 years old.

    She admitted even that if she had met me and was a younger version of herself, she wouldn't have even given me a second glance. Why? Because back when she was in her 20's, guys like me kinda just blended together. Plenty of guys who fit my profile were interested in her and she got so much attention from them that either she became numb to it or she just got tired of it.

    The man she chose to marry was your typical alpha male bad boy. Why? Well he stood out. Her family disliked him and warned him that he was a jerk. Her friends did the same. But she was attracted to him because he treated her well because she was young and hot. Once they got married and started having a family together, his true colours came out. Despite having alpha qualities, the guy actually turned out to be pretty cowardly when it came to real responsibilities such as being a good provider and being able to have a sustainable career. Her resentment at him grew for not doing his part in providing for his family and they just grew apart.

    She admits all of this with no agenda. She tells things like it is. That's what I like about her because she's always straight up and honest and real.

    She told me it's not a gradual thing either. Life changes on a dime and that goes true for young, attractive women. When they're young and single and unattached, it's like all the guys around them want to date them. Then once their life situation changes like when they get married and have a kid, all the men disappear. It wasn't a slow, gradual thing.

    Similarly for single guys in their 30s, things can also change on a dime. I'm sure most guys in this forum can relate. You spent your 20's making effort and getting sick and tired of being turned down by girls your age. You start to develop self-confidence issues and thinking there's something wrong with you. Then once you start placing yourself in an environment where there's older women, you suddenly become a magnet that you always dreamed of being.

    When I say it's kinda sad, I don't mean it's sad for these older divorced single women. They were right to dump their ex-alpha male husbands who turned out to be losers. They made the right decision to raise their kids and live the life they see fit.

    I'm saying it's sad because it took them all the heartache to finally see things this way. To finally see that there is value in the "decent guy" and in the kinda guy who isn't tall, dark and handsome and isn't the loudest guy in the room and who doesn't always know how to say the right thing at the right time.



  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Gender:
    Location
    Los Angeles
    Age
    42
    Posts
    535

    This is all so true.

    My best friend is a single woman and over the years she's told me how the men in her age range are more and more idiots as her and they grow older. Which means more opportunities for guys who are "merely" polite, reliable, and moderately attractive.

    I don't hold a grudge against women who didn't recognize decent guys when they were younger. They had options and they picked the best ones they had at the time. Now the pendulum has swung and we get to enjoy picking our best options.

  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by CountVronsky View Post
    I'll just go out and say this. If you're a single, unattached guy in your 30s and you're in relatively good shape, still have hair, career is good, and dress reasonably well and if you have a hobby or two, getting women 40 and older is so easy, it's unbelievable.

    When I say it's "easy", I don't mean there's no effort. But from the perspective of a guy who spent his 20s and early 30's going after young, attractive women and went through the brutal rejections and spending all that time and money and all he got in return was a date or two before being gradually ghosted, it's pretty damn easy.

    Women in this demographic make it easy for you. They give signals and show their interest right away. And when you do talk to them, they're very eager and enthusiastic. There's no grey area. And not all of these women are unattractive either. In fact, that's kinda what I wanted to talk about in this thread.

    Some of the women in this demographic I'm talking about are accomplished, successful women with money and good careers. Their physical shape is still great especially given the fact that they've had one or two children at this point. They are confident too and that's why it's easy to get with them because they show interest directly. I think they've been through enough experiences in their life that they just don't bother with the coyness.

    A lot of this is to do with what's available in their dating pool. Most men in their age group who are still available for dating are overweight and balding. The good ones are either married or not single for very long or just have no interest in long-term relationships. And some are experiencing mid-life career crisis and have just plainly lost confidence in themselves.

    So when they see a relatively young guy who still has a decent body and a head full of hair, has no kids, and his career is still good and he loves playing guitar or some other artistic hobby, they just can't help but be drawn to him. I'm not talking about myself here. Plenty of guys fit this profile.

    One of the women who fit this demographic I am good friends with. We have a casual relationship. We hookup occasionally but we also spend time together just talking over coffee. She has two kids from a prior marriage. She has a PhD and is doing well for herself and her kids. She still looks great and fit and is very active. She's 42 years old.

    She admitted even that if she had met me and was a younger version of herself, she wouldn't have even given me a second glance. Why? Because back when she was in her 20's, guys like me kinda just blended together. Plenty of guys who fit my profile were interested in her and she got so much attention from them that either she became numb to it or she just got tired of it.

    The man she chose to marry was your typical alpha male bad boy. Why? Well he stood out. Her family disliked him and warned him that he was a jerk. Her friends did the same. But she was attracted to him because he treated her well because she was young and hot. Once they got married and started having a family together, his true colours came out. Despite having alpha qualities, the guy actually turned out to be pretty cowardly when it came to real responsibilities such as being a good provider and being able to have a sustainable career. Her resentment at him grew for not doing his part in providing for his family and they just grew apart.

    She admits all of this with no agenda. She tells things like it is. That's what I like about her because she's always straight up and honest and real.

    She told me it's not a gradual thing either. Life changes on a dime and that goes true for young, attractive women. When they're young and single and unattached, it's like all the guys around them want to date them. Then once their life situation changes like when they get married and have a kid, all the men disappear. It wasn't a slow, gradual thing.

    Similarly for single guys in their 30s, things can also change on a dime. I'm sure most guys in this forum can relate. You spent your 20's making effort and getting sick and tired of being turned down by girls your age. You start to develop self-confidence issues and thinking there's something wrong with you. Then once you start placing yourself in an environment where there's older women, you suddenly become a magnet that you always dreamed of being.

    When I say it's kinda sad, I don't mean it's sad for these older divorced single women. They were right to dump their ex-alpha male husbands who turned out to be losers. They made the right decision to raise their kids and live the life they see fit.

    I'm saying it's sad because it took them all the heartache to finally see things this way. To finally see that there is value in the "decent guy" and in the kinda guy who isn't tall, dark and handsome and isn't the loudest guy in the room and who doesn't always know how to say the right thing at the right time.
    TRUTH.

    I adore accomplished, older women. I’ve had relationships with a woman who won the Pulitzer Prize and with one who was on the New York Times Bestseller list twice. I’ve also dated enough attorneys/doctors/software execs to fill several baseball teams. These women are sexy and gorgeous beyond belief, they’re amazing in bed, they have important careers, and they feel invisible. You don’t even have to be younger than they are—at 56, I’m still drilling deep into this well of talent.

    To game these women, the most important thing is to tone it down. They’re not club girls. They’re painfully aware that they’ve lost the upper hand. Many of them are looking really hard at giving up, but they’re not quite ready for that, so there’s no need to beat them over the head. Gentle game is good game.

    The second most important thing is to understand that they know what they want. If that’s you, then they’ll let you know. If not, then you’re out of luck and the stuff that works with younger women only makes you look silly. The best bet in that case is to hang back, be cool, and game other women. Sometimes that gets them to reconsider.

    The biggest risk is letting the see you being needy too soon. They want a man to need them, but if you do it too soon, then they’ll eat you for lunch and pick their teeth with your bones.

    But as a rule, if your shoes are tied and your fly is zipped, then you might as well be George Clooney.


    Silver

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