getting back in the game

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  1. #1

    getting back in the game

    Been out of the game for a while now. Got caught up in work and needed to get my own place done as that was messing up my logistics.
    Now all is in order and started getting back in action.

    Me in short: well paid, well groomed, confident, goodlooking (hear say), and started working out more and more to buff up. Got a nice place in city center that I built and designed myself. Used it in the past for convo topics and girls seem very impressed by it. Overall relaxed and sometimes quiet guy. Not the fast smooth talker. Which is why I feel awkward in actual aproaches. (still suck at those..)

    Anyway.. because I'm rusty I'm starting off with many hookup apps (hotornot/badoo/skout/jaumo/tinder) to ease back in. My Tinder matches suck bigtime. badoo/hotornor I get some profile views from hotties but convo won't pick up. Jaumo and Skout have better succes rates. I have paid subscription for jaumo so might help. But all in all nothing big so far. 1:15 response rate orso.

    Of course I'm hitting up all the 9's and 10's but they have exploding inboxes so I can't beat myself up over not getting a response. Some of them responded but I can't keep the convo going. Can't keep their attention it seems. Had a fun convo with a 9 yesterday evening. Sent simple text this morning, no response yet. Overall hard to stand out. Want to improve my response rate nonetheless. Gonna try some better pics and perhaps a small intro.

    Few conclusions I think I can make:
    - My looks get me some point because of the profile views.
    - Responses from the HB's also confirm (I think) that its not my looks that turns them off.
    - Not sure whether my profile info turns them off. I usually just fill out the facts, no fancy intro's)
    - My online/text game is pretty rusty..

    Some of the openers I usually use are pretty straight forward:
    - Something along the line of how hot they are.
    - Asked about the tits of a 10 if they were real or fake and actually got a response from her. Kind of threw me off and I messed up pretty soon after.
    - I find something unique in their profile and use that as a topic. mixed responses from that.

    All in all looking for tips to improve. Wil/can post more info and details later on..



  2. #2

    getting back in the game

    Small addition. I noticed that sending another message after 1 or 2 days improved response rate a lot.
    I think girls know guys basically chat up everything with a p***y and they are one of many. Sending another message conveys you are sincerely interrested and she not part of a bulk mail.

    Also, it shows you are normal. Many guys turn psycho if a girl doesnt respond.

  3. #3

    So.. after 2nd or 3rd messages after I didn't get a response I noticed successrate improved like 50%. So thats good.
    Though connections are still fragile and tend to die out.

    Weird thing I noticed was that some girls become very bland and almost distant at some point.
    Up to a point where I feel they are losing interest. With one I decided to ask for her number anyway and then actually got it (to my surprise).
    Another I asked for her number but got her KiK messenger.
    They keep responding to my texts though but rarely do I get a question back. Not sure what to make of that.
    Though one of them responded that she wouldn't mind doing my laundry if she was at my place :S So I take that as good sign.

    Both of them don't really live close by. And I hate traveling long hours for girls overall because I'm a busy man and its a waste of my time.

    Gonna try asking for numbers even sooner. I usually wait a bit till it feels right but my "feeling" might be whats messing things up. Getting her off a generic app and onto a specific one as soon as possible will be my coming goal.

  4. #4

    getting back in the game

    Asked a few of them to meet up. Around 5 of them. 1 hasnt replied yet. 2 said that they didn't know me wel enough to meet up. 1 waiting for answer and one Said yes and trying to seal the deal for this weekend.

    What i've noticed is I tend to stay in "question mode". I keep asking questions trying to get to know them and build some comfort but i'm even bored with myself. They keep responding though It could be out of courtesy.

  5. The start of your intro sounded promising. Where you lost me was the following:
    - Something along the line of how hot they are.
    - Asked about the tits of a 10 if they were real or fake and actually got a response from her.

    When I read that, I felt that was creepy or in the same bucket as every other guy that messages her. Perhaps you didn't mean it as you presented it above, but that doesn't like something they would jump all over. I usually go funny - it throws them for a loop, gets you noticed and I love a girl with a great sense of humour (so a bit of a screen for me).

    Just my 2 cents....

  6. So, another status update.

    Have several leads atm. Will give a short description about the HB’s so to keep them apart. I’m writing this down so I can kind of register what I did and maybe determine where I stuff up. Also tips and help is appreciated.

    Crossfit chick: HB8. Works out 4/5 times a week/loves icecream.
    Status: Been building comfort for a while. Asked her out for some ice-cream few days ago but she said she didn’t know me well enough yet. Conversation is still going though and she is starting to ask more questions. I take that as solid IOI and just need to stick with it.

    Submissive chick: HB9. Met on BDSM related website/Likes to be submissive/has 5 year old daughter/works fulltime
    Status: asked her to go get a drink. Said she was busy next week and I said “ok we’ll try the week after. Take your time.” She’s a single mom and works fulltime so I think the “excuse” is legit. Though so far no response yet. During our first chats she said this could happen, that she might become absent for a while due to her schedule.

    Consultancy chick: HB8: met her in a chatroom/works long days in consultancy/sent pics of herself in bikini/showed her a pic of me, said I was sexy
    Status: Asked her to go get a drink. Didn’t know me well enough she said. Continued some chatting afterwards. But been quiet for almost a week now.

    20 year old chick: HB? /met in chatroom/goes hot-cold/haven’t seen her pic yet.
    Status: Asked for a drink, same here, didn’t know me well enough yet. Been cold for a while.

    Double D smiles: HB9. Jobless/giggly/DD breasts..
    Status: Hit it off quite quick, she started asking questions pretty early on so a solid IOI. Asked to see pics of my house. (not the bedroom unfortunately). Though it was a clear shot. Asked for a drink, been silent ever since.

    Gipsy Girl: HB9. Gipsy family/lots of tats/strong and athletic body/works in psych ward.
    Status: Most far along of all of them. Planned to meet up this weekend. (even though its a 2 hour drive for me) talked on the phone day before yesterday. All seemed well. I told her lets meet Sunday. She kept saying she was looking forward to it. Also said flat out she liked me and thought I was funny. Texted her yesterday, no response yet. Dunno what happened here.

    18 Y old chick
    : HB8 Very young but just to practice my game/acts older for her age. Previous BF was 26.
    Status: had lengthy convo on an app. Thought all was well, asked for a drink, no response yet. Been 2 days.

    MILF34: HB7 Mother of 2/divorced/kids are with her every other week.
    Status: Had short chat. Topic came to me finishing my crib. She said time for a party. Asked if she would come. She said yes. Planned a drink for next week Wednesday 19:00. (If I don’t stuff it up before hand)

    Had a few other leads, some I had lengthy convo’s with but I never actually asked them out. Got stuck in question mode. Now they don’t respond anymore. That seems to be my pitfall. Others I asked out too soon (Like DoubleD smiles) and they just go silent. Still a bad judge of how far in comfort I am. Need to read up on that again.

    Will try regular updates in the future.

  7. @Firecode Thanks for the reply. You actually saying it was in the same bucket as every other guy is something I actually needed to hear because its probably true. I was just blinded for a bit. Wasn't paying enough attention and am just too rusty.

    Starting to notice that the "under the radar" approaches work better for now though. But its not getting the responses I want. I get stuck in boring back and forth questioning and I'm very rusty on my funny intro's. Can't think of anything funny to say so I usually go into question mode cause it feels safe (to me) for some reason. Still working on some inner issues as well which might have some effect.

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