The Echo by Cajun

I remember in 2005, when I first started reading about “pick-up” I thought to myself “I don’t need this, I’m already pretty good, plus it sounds like bullshit. It can’t be that simple.” My average of one random make out a month and sex a couple times a year at the time made me feel like I was the crowned king of carnal knowledge. Attracting women is based on personality, so what more could I learn!? Of course when I met some other guys who were studying this “game”, and saw how they were doing when out in bars, it completely blew me away. I still wasn’t sold though, and if anything it made me angrier. If it was this simple, why couldn’t I figure it out before?


Looking back in hindsight, it’s easy to see what made me so angry. It’s the reason I don’t give advice to guys unless they ask, or why the uninformed and the media will label what I teach as “manipulative” or “cheesy”. Pick-up is offensive! But why? What is so offensive about learning a skill that our happiness and quality of life is primarily derived from and is literally required for us to survive as a species? Well, why it’s offensive depends on how you look at it.

I think as men, we find pick-up offensive because it’s a huge blow to our ego. If attracting women was as easy as reading a book or taking a weekend seminar, then how the fuck did we not figure it out sooner? Either we’re being bullshitted to or this stuff actually works and we’re obviously idiots. Which is easier to accept? Even right now, as you read this there’s probably still a voice that rings out in your head “This is bullshit! This would never work for me!” it may not be as strong as it used to, but it’s still there, trying to help you avoid the embarrassing reality of admitting you’re not where you’d like to be when it comes to being attractive to women. Maybe you've decided that the system we teach does work, but it just wouldn't work for you. YOU are too old, too fat, too poor, too bald, too shy, too short, too ugly or too stupid, so there’s no hope for you. Do you recognize this voice? That’s your ego again, giving you excuses as to why you shouldn’t feel bad for being too scared to jump off into potentially embarrassing scenarios. Scenarios that, if conquered, would mold you into the man you so desperately wish to become.

If only it were easier…

When I tell people that my bootcamps cost $3000 they usually scoff at me and in a tone reeking of disbelief exclaim “Guys pay THAT much for dating advice!?” I usually just smile politely and say “yes.” The truth is that it’s probably easy for guys to hide behind the price tag as being too high, when in reality anyone that does the math will find that the amount you will spend in one year on wasted dates, failed relationships, drinks to drown out fears, and distractions to occupy yourself when alone will greatly exceed $3000. That’s not even counting all the money spent on clothes, cars, and accessories that men spend almost solely to appear more attractive. The truth is that this is an investment in YOU, and as clichéd as that sounds it is a belief completely devoid of any facetious spin, marketing angle or smarmy sales talk, and it is the reason why I keep doing this job. It will have positive effects on your social life, your family, your job, and ultimately your happiness…but don’t think that just because you’re paying for it, that it’s going to be easy.

Here’s something I’m willing to admit that may go against the marketing hype you hear about this stuff. Anyone that promises to fix all your problems with women over a weekend probably IS bullshitting you. I’ve had plenty of clients with tremendous, dramatic changes over 3 days but the truth is that it takes a lot more than a weekend to become truly good with women. The truth is that this is FUCKING HARD. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. There’s a reason we’ve had doctors, lawyers, CEOs and even Astronauts come to us for help: this isn’t easy! In my bootcamps I really only give men the tools so that they can fix themselves, over a period of time. The one thing I do change in them over the weekend is how they deal with fear. Which I believe is the biggest hurdle as it affects everything we do. This comes down to being able to shut off the voice in your head that tells you not to do things because you might get embarrassed. This whisper in the back of your mind that feeds you comfortable poison as your masculinity retreats. If only we could rise up, blood boiling, and with eyes wide and shining like the sun, speak out: “FUCK THIS! I’M SICK OF BEING SCARED OF THIS SHIT!” and in that instant feel the power of a thousand generations of men who lived, fucked and died so that you could continue to do the same and pass it on for a thousand generations more.

Or will it stop with you?

Start listening to the voice that called to you when you sought out this very forum: the distant echo of the man who you truly are. He wants out, and the longer you keep him in and suppress him the longer you will live in quiet desperation for the things you know you deserve, and then one day he will die. And in many ways, so will you.

~Derek Cajun