Ex contacted me after 1 year with a interessting message
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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Amsterdam, The Netherlands

    Ex contacted me after 1 year with a interessting message

    I'm just looking for other peoples view on this:

    Ex and me broke up 1 year ago. Cost me some effort and fall backs, but I got over her a couple months ago. Current situation is that I have been dating again, in the proces of a Fuck buddy and getting out of the rat race. She apparently got dumped by her boyfriend.

    She sent me a message through facebook with this:

    I'm sure this is not a msg u where expecting. But sometimes people (me) realize things and have the need to spit it out.
    I realize something today and it was all the things I put you trough. I never valued your person, how it really needed to be valued. You where only good and kind to me, but I was to blind to see that. Your a real man *myname, and I hope really that you never change, let nobody take you down.
    Even though I never lied to you and always tried to be honest I know realize that things should have been done a different way. I'm really sorry for all I put you trough. Maybe you maybe thinking why this msg? Why now? Well here's your answer. Have you heard te saying "Karma is a bitch?" its so true... Lol I can't help laughing because it had to happen to me for me to understand what I did to you.

    I hope your doing great and that you archived all your goals.
    God bless you"

    So I haven't responds yet and it's been a couple of days.
    As far as I'm concerned i've got a few options:

    1. Ignore
    2. Say thank you and leave it a that
    3. Respond and a open question for casual contact
    4. Respond and try to see if something is there

    What do you guys think of this?

    And as always thank you for your opinions. This forum has helped me a lot and turned me into a better man.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010

    No one can give you an answer to this. YOU need to decide what you want from her THEN reply.

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I777 using Tapatalk 2

  3. For me it would depend on if I still liked her I've got back with girls where I had originally messed up with in the past coming back with a stronger frame. If however she was rude and disrespectful the only good thing I would do is invite her to the local swingers club

  4. #4

    Have to agree with previous posters you have to decide what you want.

  5. #5

    How come you ask us what do you want to do? Makes no sense =P

  6. #6

    Depends. If you don't give a shit and like your current fwb, let her know you're doing fine and wish her the best. If you want, you can mention that the past is done with and you've got no ill feelings towards her.

    If you want to fuck her, I guess you could respond and suggest a get together for coffee or whatever.

    This is something you have to decide for yourself due to the fact that it's been a year since the break up and she just got dumped.

  7. #7

    This almost seems like a ploy for her to gain closure and put to rest some unresolved feelings she has concerning you. If you are happy in your current situation then a simple one word reply like, "thanks" would be enough. Honestly, I don't think I'd reply to something like that unless she messages you again or won't leave you alone. You don't owe her anything.

  8. #8

    I would just say
    Karma is a bitch and leave it.

    Sent from my iPhone on an overpriced data plan

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    NorthEast US

    Ignore it and keep moving forward with your life.

    Nothing positive (for you) will come out of replying, she is just trying to relieve her own guilt.

  10. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by J1121 View Post
    I would just say
    Karma is a bitch and leave it.

    Sent from my iPhone on an overpriced data plan
    To some degree I understand this, but you never want to leave her worse off - bitter feelings just show hurt, not improvement.

    I'd just reply, thank her and move on. If you're looking for something from her, it wouldn't hurt to mention it (now that you've healed up), but other than that, I don't see a reason to go back to her considering it sounds like she used you for your kindness.

    If it were me, I'd thank her politely and keep it casual. If she wanted more than to just "apologize", she'd tell you.

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