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07-26-2012, 10:23 PM #1
- Join Date
- Aug 2007
Im 32 Years Old - No Social Life - I am Going Nuts
I dont know how much I am going to type here, but I just wanted to say hello on here and release some of my issues.
I hope I dont piss anyone off... but I'd love anyone's input.
Despite the desire to be wordy, I will try to be concise and to the point.
I am a 32 year old dude. I am small-boned (have some issues with it) but I am 5'11" and all my life I've been viewed as good looking. As a child I was a nerd (still am) but was always was very popular. I became a big pot smoker at 18 and eventually got into hard drugs (heroin) by 24 and I have been sober since. Despite it all, I had a fantastic social life due to high school and college.
I love people. I love women.. probably way more than most guys. Throughout my life I've dated and slept with maybe 25 women, and I got my fair share of attention, especially when I was not sober and I had significantly less anxiety.
I've still had several episodes with women over the last few years, but I've mainly been with girlfriends, (although I have had some outside encounters a few times during down periods)
Anyway, here is the deal: I have now been sober 7 years. I make my money via the internet and I've done very well for myself. but I have NO social life.
Oh, and I forgot to mention, I"ve been dating a very hot foreign girl for about 3 years but I am just not ready to commit... so we are in the process of breaking up.
So now I am 32 years old, half my friends are married.. or are about to get married, and I stll want to be 18 years old again. Part of me wants to get intoxicated again (only drink - no drug use) and just cease the day and live life up..
(Sad but true: I find partying moments some of the most alive moments in my life.)
However, dont get me wrong -- I do not have to drink again to have a good time. I can do it sober too.
Anyway, I am rambling here, but I just wanted some feedback on what the hell to do. I tried to join OKCupid recently only to find that no one writes me back.. and I hate writing shit to people knowing they might not write back. Plus, I feel like quality women are not on there.. and if they are quality, they do not NEED to go on there.
So a part of me wants to find a wingman. I have ONE guy friend in the metro area that I live in, and I've recently asked him if he was gay. I had a hunch for a long time and now we've come to the conclusion that hes sexually confused and .. well, I thnk hes quite confused with a lot of things in his life.
I've also perused Meetup.com but I am not sure what kind of people are in there..
Well, I really do not know what the point of this post is .... I guess I have many questions.
What do I do with my life? Where do I meet wingmen? Can I go out alone? Should I travel abroad?
Also, what are the best materials to read? I've done The Game, years ago, but I also have discovered Mark Manson, and I found him quite interesting. Anyone ever heard of him?
THe material I would truly LOVE to listen to / watch would be recordings of actual conversations with women. Because that is where I really struggle. I cannot flirt and I've kind of become the sort of odd guy.. probably because I have NO social life and work 100% from home.
Anyway sorry for all the ramblings -- I'd love to get some feedback if anyone has any
08-01-2012, 06:59 AM #2
In the interests of your sobriety, do not start drinking- it could easily lead to a relapse.
I recommend reading Magic Bullets and reading as much as you can stand on here about Inner Game.
08-02-2012, 04:16 AM #3
The best course of action is to sit down and write out some activities that actually interest you. Then find a place to do them. The gym is a good place to meet some cool guys. I ended up taking Muay Thai and you meet really cool people by simply going out and exploring.
08-02-2012, 05:33 AM #4
If you want to meet women go out to the clubs and speak to them. You don't need a wingman to speak to women as even if your out with them there not going to hold your hand, everytime a man speaks to a woman he is doing it alone!
08-02-2012, 02:12 PM #5
- Join Date
- Aug 2012
Here are a few things you need to do.
Join a gym and bulk up (just gain a few pounds of muscle). Women LOVE a well-built man, trust me !
Sort out your grooming; get a haircut, shave, invest in a good cologne, dress smart.
Go out more. Mingle with the ladies.
Go to clubs. There are ALWAYS plenty of gorgeous women there.
DO NOT WATCH PORN & masturbate. It will mess you up (once again, trust me on that one).
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