How do you break up with a GF and still be friends??
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  1. #1

    How do you break up with a GF and still be friends??

    I am fairly good at getting girls, having sex, and starting relationships, but I completely suck at breakups. Usually I pull a bitch move like email or text break ups, make up some false story, be blunt and rude, or simply stop talking to them--all in all, I cannot maintain a relationship of any sort after break up cause I'm so terrible at it.

    Let me cliff you on my current situation: I met a girl 2 months ago, it was instant connection, and we immediately started dating. I've never experienced such an emotional/physical/sexual connection with anyone, and it was quite mutual, so we became a couple within a week. I like everything about this girl emotionally and physically, but when logic kicks in, I realize I can't be with her any more. To sum it up, she's a pill-popping party girl alcoholic, with no education, and no aspiration to become anything but a career waitress. I'm doing a double-masters on a full ride scholarship at a top university with grand dreams for my life. Simply put, as rude and condescending as it sounds, this cannot be a long term relationship, so it's best to end it now.

    The problem is I'd like to break up with her and still be able to maintain some sort of relationship to accomplish the following selfish goals, in order of importance:
    1. She's real fun to hang out with, would like to continue partying with her occasionally.
    2. Physical connection is great, so sex is pretty damn good. Would love to continue that as well.
    3. She pretty much knows everyone in town. If I break up with her badly, I may have a bad reputation.

    Is this doable at all? And if I can't accomplish any of the above goals, can I at least break up with her in a way that won't hurt her feelings and make her hate me? I would appreciate a pretty explicit answer on what to say/how to approach this cause I really am clueless.

    Thanks and sorry for the long post.

  2. #2

    Yes. It is definitely doable. Give her the old 'I dont have time for a GF right now'.

    Recon that might be one of your better options.

    Tell her how awesome she is, and the great time you and having. Let her know that your studies have to come first, and its not fair to her for her to not be a priority in your life. Let her know you want to be friends, and you really enjoy her company.

    Leave her alone after that for a week or two and then hit her up to hang out. When you are hanging out, Kino a lot early, and then just fall back into old patterns.

    You now have a GF without the GF

  3. #3

    Honesty sounds like the best policy here. She might even agree with you.

    If is a wise and honourable thing you are doing here.

    Wrap it all up in a compliment sandwich and make her feel involved in the decision. Done correctly she she can can go away with something to be happy about. For example: Despite being so different, I am insanely attracted to you. But lets face it, we lead very different lifestyles, and in the long run we will not work out. However because you are such a cool person, it is only as girlfriend and boyfriend that I don't think it would work, as friends we would never have to break up.

    Something like that. Now I have done something very similar to this and the girl continued to have sex with me for a while before I broke it off with her altogether. It will probably cause some resentment, but you just have to accept that you can't to anything about it, no matter what you do.

  4. #4

    Tell her she's not good enough for you and that you're tired of dating hoodrats lol jk I would take portraits advice. Emphasize that you like spending time with her and don't have an apologetic face on. Assume that she will understand and you guys will be friends/. That's the kind of frame you should have.

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