HELP, what on earth is going wrong? POF profile, sample messages.

Hello, having read this forum for months I gave POF a go.

Here's my profile...

I've messaged 130 girls, 17 replied (in some from or another), met 2. Are these numbers good?

What am I doing wrong? I am totally stuck, What should I try next? A different website? on okcupid I've had less success. I have wasted hours on POF. I just don't know what to do next, because I am clearly doing something wrong (or am very very ugly) but I just don't know what . Any tips, comments, critiques, help, would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you

here's a snap shot of some opener messages...

(1) Oh no, I really shouldn't be messaging you! Not only am 5 quarters American, I hike everywhere whilst totally sometimes muchly used bad grammars without my shirt. But, I'm gonna take a risk and say Hello, I like your smile!

(2) [Insert attention grabbing message]

You're awesome, I love your likes, your Uke and your smile x

(reference to beard comments on her profile)
You other sisters can't deny
That when a man walks in with an itty bitty tash
And a goatee in your face
You get sprung

I'm quite good at talking to cars; I managed to convince my old fiesta it was a good idea to start up, after she conked out at a busy intersection. We don't keep in touch now unfortunately. What's your KA's name? She sounds nice. I love your lil dog, and your smile Hope you're having an awesome day. X

(5) I've seen a few penguins in my time but you make the best fluffy penguin! Can you dance like you see them do on that documentary "Happy Feet"? x

(6) Cereal is an awesome meal anytime of the day! Whatís your favourite cereal of all time.. I'll guess, frosted wheatís or special K red berries? I hate fizzy drinks, itís the fizzyness that does it for me, its like a bubble attack on your mouth! Has your dog ever tried cereal? X

Be careful, you heard what happened to the curious cat? Although I think you'll be alright based on your alligator wrestling technique. X