Epic Fail w/ a HB 10 "not ready to date" & LJBF Situation - Tell me what you think!
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  1. Epic Fail w/ a HB 10 "not ready to date" & LJBF Situation - Tell me what you think!

    Met this hb. I don't use 10 lightly. This girl is farking gorgeous. Absolutely stunning. By far the most attractive girl that's ever crossed my PUA path in the past 5 years. She is basically the twin of Alessandra Ambrosio, google the name if you don't know who that is.

    Monday: I've seen this girl workout at my gym for 4-6 months; she generally has a friend with her which makes things harder for gym game. Anyway, one day I find myself, by complete chance, working out next to her on a light-intensity machine. She was bored. There's no way I'm gonna give up this opportunity.

    I open her completely indirectly and it was flawless. It wasn't canned, it was completely situational, rooted, and relevant. It was GENUINE. There were MANY IOIs from her. I negged her a bunch; despite this girl being a 10, my game was smooth, natural, and seemingly successful.

    Before I know it, maybe 10 minutes into the convo, she's telling me sh1t like "Wow... you seriously have the coolest life ever.. How do you get away with that?" and "I wish I could travel as much as you do but I don't have nearly as much time and money with my full time job" and just general interest/amazement at my energetic, diverse, FUN life.

    Again, everything I told her and was legit. I was being myself and not caving into her beauty. I made her qualify herself and I wasn't just clamming away at how peachy everything was. I was lightly kinoing her as much as appropriate while on the machine.

    I told her straight up something like "I bet you get this all the time - random guys talking to you huh" to clear out any possibility of her thinking this is some staged pickup (I've personally seen her get hit on by at *least* 10 different guys - I didn't tell her that) It was somewhat of a compliment, but of course I wasn't going to directly compliment her just yet. She laughed and told me how guys talk to her all the time and how she just pretends she's interested, and then sh1t-tested me to see if that's what I was doing. I played it off well and called her out on it. Just as I'd planned, perfect!

    Anywho, with even more IOIs, negging, teasing, and playful banter, she shows much interest in a day 2 and she puts her number in my phone. I tell her I'm unavailable this and that day, but I could do Wednesday. She agrees and reinforces how "boring" she is (has nothing planned ever) and that wednesday would be great.

    Tues: I call to confirm the day 2 and she answers right away - More playful banter and fun on the phone. 5-6 min phone call. I arrange for her to drop her car at my place, and then to go grab some food at a totally casual local restaurant. She is happy to do so, and there were even more IOIs on the phone as she was seemingly willing to do whatever to make the day 2 happen (she was going to skip working out so that we could go earlier.. and I told her no I workout every day at that time and I thought you did too? etc.)

    Weds: She texts me 3-4 hrs before the "date" and says "hey I'm actually coming from home instead of work, can I just meet you at the restaurant at __:___, does that work for you?" I was a bit alarmed, since that had totally thrown off the plan of getting her at my place for a few mins before/after the day2. It wasn't really a legit excuse, since she still could have come to my place first prior to us travelling together to the restaurant. I kept thinking buyers remorse in my head, but I couldn't figure out why. I hadn't been needy.. I made her fit in my busy schedule, and I didn't acknowledge/slave to her looks whatsoever. Plus she showed all those IOIs. I shrugged it off and told her that it's cool (and teased her a bit for it). I'd rather her be comfortable.

    We both arrive one after another, and she jumps to hug me right when I get in the door (I had thought about whether or not she'd be weird with a hug.. but she ran up and hugged me so fast that I didn't even get a chance to act) - I respond with a side/hug thing and say Hi, etc. We sit down almost immediately and chat away about our days, random sh1t. All sorts of great DHVs and more of making her qualify. Never an awkward moment or any strange convos came up. I framed it sexually as much as I could, which was difficult with us sitting across from each other at a dinner table. I was disagreeing/conversing with her on varying opinions and telling her about all the great sh1t I'm up to. Seemingly went awesome. Btw, we agreed to split the bill, with me "offering" to pay if she wanted to hit it up next time, and she declined to do that - so we split it.

    After the restaurant, I took her outside and took her hand (she thought I was trying to shake her hand which was hilarious - so I gave her crap for that), I held her hand and walked her to her car for all of 15 seconds. She hugs me and says thanks and that she had a great time, the restaurant was so good and I'm glad we went, etc. I kiss her on the cheek (there was definitely not enough of a connection yet to make out/go for a direct kiss) and unleash 1 single compliment of "you're super cute" and she kinda hides behind her hair and says thanks all cute-style. She mentions something along the lines of "maybe I'll see you this weekend" and I tell her I'm busy friday but possibly available saturday, and to let me know. She tells me to text/call her.

    Fri: To set something up over the weekend, involving her actually seeing my place and hanging out, I shoot her a text asking if her real life guitar skills are any good in guitar hero, and she responds with something like "Don't know from experience." Then, I text again offering a guitar hero duel the next day (Saturday). It was a great plan I'd thought.. to get her over, something fun and kinoesque to do with each other and to be playful, nothing serious, nothing commital, and most importantly totally informal and NOT "datish" ('formal dates' are the most cliche thing ever and I avoid them at all cost).

    She responds... saying: "Unfortunately, I'm not as ready to date as I thought, but i'd be ok with being friends."


    I'm thinking what the fark is this? Total left field comment. I try and look back at wtf happened, and the only thing I can almost see is possibly at dinner where she almost had this shield up - absolutely not a bitch shield but a "recently hurt shield."

    I respond after some thought with 1 concise text, mentioning that I don't formally "date" in the first place, how it's cliche, and ending the text with "I'll seeya around friend " - in an attempt to mock the whole "friendship" idea. As expected, she doesn't respond back.

    So, I've been trying to decipher where I farked this one up. Judging from my gut, I think she is legitimately out of a recent relationship (or in between one, etc.) This has only happened to me one other time in 5 years of pua and the other time it was legit too - some girl figuring out her guy situation. But, on the other hand, I'm a huge believer in the fact that "No girl is a bitch or 'un-game-able,' and that it's never 'her fault.'"

    I won't be communicating with her for 3-4 weeks, going to see if a freeze out works. Even then she isn't really worth my time since there was really nothing invested. other than her being extremely attractive, she didn't offer much to the table - so that is not special at all; but trying something in a few weeks won't hurt anybody. I'm sure I will see her at the gym many times before then, so I'll just have to ignore her or smile and keep walking. (Suggestions?)

    I'd truly appreciate any feedback or ideas, or any similar happenings. Thanks in advance.

  2. You didn't escalate enough on day 1. Kiss on the cheek is friend stuff.

  3. Quote Originally Posted by RaxeAttaxe View Post
    You didn't escalate enough on day 1. Kiss on the cheek is friend stuff.
    I agree completely on both of those - but what else was I to do at the gym? I kino'd her a good amount, as much as I possibly could. It was definitely escalating. I would've opted for a much more exciting/escalatable day 2, but there weren't many options available (there's tons of outside things to do, but the weather isn't permitting this time of the year).

    And why would she mention she isn't ready to date "yet?" is this just a bs line? I'm just trying to make sense of it so I avoid another lame-ass LJBF situation in the future.

  4. Hmm...

    Dont over think the "Friend" thing. Until she she says Lets Just Be Friends I dont think its an indication she doesnt want to do sex.

    Wed - How come you didnt have anything planned after supper so you could esculate better? (Logistics may have been tricky still manageable)

    Go flirt with other B-Rods at the Gym - Should be able to gauge her reaction whether or not she is into you.

  5. Quote Originally Posted by molson View Post
    How come you didnt have anything planned after supper so you could esculate better? (Logistics may have been tricky still manageable)
    I did have it planned, but it was getting late and she had work in the morning. The whole goal was to get her back to my place, absolutely not to fuck her (sex was seriously the last thing on my mind... maybe that was my problem), but to build seduction/attraction by doing fun shit and interacting with each other - instead of sitting at a freakin dinner table. Comfort was handled, I had that done. She is comfortable around me, that isn't my problem at all. It's just that I had to get that attraction built, and I somehow managed to screw it up. I didn't even have a chance to get to seduction for whatever reason.

    You seem to think her text of wanting to be just friends means she's only Anti-relationship. I saw it more as a "yeah thanks for inviting me out but I'm not attracted to you." Am I wrong here?

  6. Quote Originally Posted by rocket87 View Post
    You seem to think her text of wanting to be just friends means she's only Anti-relationship. I saw it more as a "yeah thanks for inviting me out but I'm not attracted to you." Am I wrong here?
    From my experience - A girl calling me friend didnt influence having sex in the future. In essence its what you guys are.

    My thoughts - Shes attracted to you maybe not sure if she wants to sleep with you. Have you tried to qualify why you like her?

  7. Quote Originally Posted by molson View Post
    In essence its what you guys are.
    Yeah - Dont get me wrong.. If we could be fuck buddies that would be amazing. I wouldn't mind it at all. It's just that I set the whole thing up with less of a sexual frame in an effort to avoid doing what every other slave guy does to her (wants to fuck her) - which, again, could've been my mistake.. maybe that ended up screwing me.) I haven't given her a reason why I like her. I guess I don't usually do that with girls before I sleep with them - I let the subtle compliments do the work and that's it.

    One of my friends suggested this, and that it had to be done QUICKLY. - Initiate contact via phone asap, and begin sexual banter / innuendos immediately. I was thinking I could call her up and have her come to the mall tomorrow or some day this week, and help me shop for a new set of jeans. And while talking to her on the phone and while in person being overly sexual and setting that total sexual frame. What do you think? Any improvements I could make to that? I'm a little afraid it'll come off as an act of desperation..

  8. She brought up the dating part - even though she said she doesnt - she may.
    Maybe with the strong sexual frame she figured she would get pounded on and not sure if you like her or not. Thats my assumption.

    Awesome Text Line - " I need your help! My mom is going to give me up for adoption if I dont find a date." Send this in a few days and if shes interested it should help you setup a second date. How old are you kids by the way?

    99% of things women say means Bat Shit to most. Her not responding that is a sign - maybe too eager.

  9. Haha yeah, 99% of it really is bat shit.

    I am 24 and she is 23. She works full time, 9-5, barely any hobbies, and kind of an uninteresting life... I really don't see much in her to be honest... other than her being super attractive. (I gave her crap for it too, playfully.. I was trying to dig for more but it was difficult).

    Where as I'm a business owner who makes my own schedule, investor, constantly travelling, and playing with toys for fun (driving, sportbike riding, flying). It's like she couldn't "get" my non-conformist life, she was like a lost puppy trying to figure me out it seemed.

    I just need a plan. This girl is ridiculously hot. If she truly is that boring, I don't want a relationship with her anyway. I know the eagerness was too much too soon, but I would really like to devise a plan to try and salvage at least something from it. I think contacting tomorrow is too soon, so maybe I'll wait til weds/thurs this week or whenever I see her next. I have to research some crazy overly sexual lines/routines, because that's going to be HUGE in making this work in my favor.

    Btw, you've successfully convinced me that this isn't an epic fail at all, and that it is absolutely no big deal; and while I may have screwed up some aspects of the interaction, it's still completely gameable and workable. I hope you're right man.

  10. Thats where she may love you. Where you have a very interesting life that she could enjoy it with.
    Out of curiousity what kind of business...

    Maybe she feels that you dont know her (Rapport). Try transitioning she knows and seen the sexual part - thats why she met went out on a date.
    Just ask her Whats up in her world. If you came off to sexual it may have turned away as well.

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