Why do EXes come back if we dont talk to them?
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  1. Why do EXes come back if we dont talk to them?

    We all know it works. Probably up to 50% of the time if we follow all the steps perfectly. If they break up with us and we want them back, we cut all contact with them. Within a few months, they want us back.

    I want to know why this works. The reason its important is because when they come back. What drives them back? Is it because they just suddenly really miss us? Or because by not calling them, we actually become a stronger person in their eyes? Or because they tried other relationships and they didn't work (in other words you are a backup?). Its important to know, because if/when they do come back, I dont want to screw it up again and I dont want to take her back for the wrong reasons (if I am a backup)

    Does "no contact" work better in some situations than other (like if two people have been together longer or did more together or were in love?) What if a girl is seeing someone else? Is she still likely to come back?

  2. #2
    IDSC Guest

    All great questions! I don't have then answers but highly reco others to think 'bout this too

  3. #3

    If she broke up with you and you are going to cut her completely off, I don't think i't will work. You have to show her that you have moved on and don't want her back (even if you want her back)! Everyone wants the things that they can't have! You can sleep with some off her friends... or something like that!

  4. #4

    People tend to remember the GOOD things that happened in a previous relationship. Never really the bad things as much. It is possible that your EX gf may be missing you and all the "good emotions and feelings" that you allowed her to have.

    She might contact you b/c you have moved on and she is..jealous that she has not moved on as quickly as you. This can even occur if she is the one dumping you.

    Girls also never ever like to cut contact off with anyone completely. Ever notice that girls keep about 90% of the phone numbers they have accumulated over their life?

    Its about validation, loneliness, and nostalgia of better times.

  5. /\ Well Put

  6. ...

    Because most guys try to almost harass their ex's and bug them. They become an nuisance and its awkward and something for her to bitch about her girlfriends about. It makes you look desperate, pathetic.

    By not being around calling, txting and going out and living your life meeting girls and such. She remembers what she had , and what she has lost. She realizes that she has or is loosing you ( the good catch ) and that she wants you back! She must miss you though.

    you never really realize what you had till its gone. And for her to realize that you must be .... GONE

  7. Yeah, that sounds about right. I was sooo tempted to call my ex today, but I have a great female friend, who is a master of the game. She kept telling me not to. I said "Can I just text her to ask her when she wants to pick up the rest of her stuff?" No. She said that I am feeling like she might be moving on. More importantly, she will start to feel like I am moving on. This is really important. Until she feels that way, she wont really think she has lost anything because deep down inside, she knows she can get you back at the snap of a finger.

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