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    Problem getting hard, but can get hard to porn, help?!

    Hey guys,
    so problem is, with my current girlfriend we've done everything and kinda had sex. But, i can't get hard when we're making out, every now and then i have a random surge of hardness but then when i reach for the condom i lose it. I never used to have this problem, then all of a sudden it happened with one chick (that i had met once before, got her number, then met and went to hers) i think coz i didn't know her at all i wasn't comfortable and lost it, then it happened with the next chick, and now happening with my current girlfriend. how can i stop it? I tried not watch porn for 2 weeks, nothing much changed. i dont masterbate that often either TBH, like 2-3 times a week. when i watch porn, even if the chicks arent THAT hot in it, i'll still get a hard on, but in real life its not the same
    help?!
    If u have any really good advice can you email me so i can see it on my phone, i'll be out the rest of today.
    P.s i havent really had sex before. with my current girlfriend i penetrated but lost erection, guess it counts tho.
    Many thanks guys,
    Last edited by Awesomedude; 03-27-2010 at 05:35 AM. Reason: more info



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    I've had kinda the same problem my first time!
    tbh it still happens sometimes, and I really dont know why
    your problem might be being nervous, insecure,...?

    kinda weird to talk about, but when you feel losing it, just keep going or you'll be all done

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    Wait. So you're watching porn but not masturbating? That's funny.

    Seriously though, cut out porn AND masturbating. You sound young and are inexperienced. Don't worry, we were all there once. You know your body better than anyone, and the next time you're about to have sex, tell the girl what you like and get her to do it for you. Whatever it is that gets you hot, have her help you out. So when that time comes, you'll be ragin' like a rocket, and ready to go.

    Nerves suck. You just gotta get past the first time or two, and you'll be fine.

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    this is funny because i just saw a viagra commercial. if all else fails, get some viagra from your doctor.... 20 million men have it.
    "Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes."
    Oscar Wilde

    Quote Originally Posted by CMPitts View Post
    It's simple. You don't make her 'gina tingle anymore.


    http://www.theattractionforums.com/best-forum/141942-2011-up-date-community-guide.html

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    I think you might be getting performance anxiety, and haven't gotten into messing around enough. Your girl should be giving HJs and BJs, but make sure when she's giving you hand relief, it's to your liking and don't be afraid to criticize her if she's doing it too fast and too hard. In the case of BJs, you have to be a lot more careful about being critical, but a handjob I have no problem telling someone how I like it.

    What's going through your head that's causing you to lose your erection?


    Quote Originally Posted by Awesomedude View Post
    Hey guys,
    so problem is, with my current girlfriend we've done everything and kinda had sex. But, i can't get hard when we're making out, every now and then i have a random surge of hardness but then when i reach for the condom i lose it. I never used to have this problem, then all of a sudden it happened with one chick (that i had met once before, got her number, then met and went to hers) i think coz i didn't know her at all i wasn't comfortable and lost it, then it happened with the next chick, and now happening with my current girlfriend. how can i stop it? I tried not watch porn for 2 weeks, nothing much changed. i dont masterbate that often either TBH, like 2-3 times a week. when i watch porn, even if the chicks arent THAT hot in it, i'll still get a hard on, but in real life its not the same
    help?!
    If u have any really good advice can you email me so i can see it on my phone, i'll be out the rest of today.
    P.s i havent really had sex before. with my current girlfriend i penetrated but lost erection, guess it counts tho.
    Many thanks guys,

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    You're focusing too much on penetration. Try pleasing your girl and saying, "I don't want you to touch me". Be her sex-slave for a while. Focusing your mind and body on pleasing her will gradually take your attention away from your erection. Give this time, there's no rush.

    The problem might take a while to fix but the fact that you're getting hard to porn indicates it's a psychological block, and that physically you're functioning well. Your doctor is there to help you too.

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    I have a problem with getting hard for sex at first til i realised that it was nerve. She is your girlfriend, so start the sex stuff by making a complete fool of yourself somehow, get both of you laughing about it and relax..
    The secret to ALL success is the same - patience, practice and confidence.

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    Stop watching porn in general. It is toxic to both mind and body. Whilst watching porn your body gets used to "visual" excitement as oppose to "emotional" excitement, and you become too focussed on the visual parts of sex. In return this releases different hormones which you cannot get from having normal sex. Cut out the porn as a whole and your mind and body will heal.

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    This is common and nothing to worry about. Just masturbate sometimes and just use your imagination to get yourself hard. Porn makes you rely only on the visual aspect of sex making ur imagination go numb. So when the time comes to have sex with a girl since you need to rely on more earthly stimulation its only natural to not be able to get yourself hard. Even then just pleasure her with your fingers and mouth and eventually u ll ge a hard on.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jazzman88 View Post
    Stop watching porn in general. It is toxic to both mind and body. Whilst watching porn your body gets used to "visual" excitement as oppose to "emotional" excitement, and you become too focussed on the visual parts of sex. In return this releases different hormones which you cannot get from having normal sex. Cut out the porn as a whole and your mind and body will heal.
    That's deep like hell and very true

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