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Discuss Have you ever had a woman ask you to hit her during sex? at the Sex within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Have you ever had a woman ask you to hit her during sex? WTF right. ...
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    Have you ever had a woman ask you to hit her during sex?

    WTF right.

    Its like this: This blonde HB9 I'm dating really gets off on being humiliated and domineered during sex. Pushing her head down, holding her wrists, she completely gets off on being powerless. She loves it when I cum on her face, because she says it denigrates her. She only likes these things in the "game of sex" as she calls it, not in the rest of a relationship.

    She recently asked me how I felt about hitting her during sex. Even though inside I was like "WTF". I said: "how many teeth you want me to knock out?"

    She got defensive and said look I'm sharing things with you I've never told anyone please don't joke about it as I like you and am afraid of how you'll respond.

    Cut a long story short she enjoys being slapped in the face during sex (not too hard) just to get a kick on the "being put in her place" thing.

    Anyone else had anything similar?



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    Dude, absolutely do not make jokes about her desires. Personally my motto is to give the girl what she wants. The ass is an area that can take alot of slap/spanks without it hurting her. I'm personally open to all that, but that's just me.
    If you don't believe in yourself, no one else will.

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    Do a search -- this has been covered quite a bit before.
    When I am writing in red, it's as an Attraction Forums Admin. When I write in normal text, it's just me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by gold333 View Post
    WTF right.

    Its like this: This blonde HB9 I'm dating really gets off on being humiliated and domineered during sex. Pushing her head down, holding her wrists, she completely gets off on being powerless. She loves it when I cum on her face, because she says it denigrates her. She only likes these things in the "game of sex" as she calls it, not in the rest of a relationship.

    She recently asked me how I felt about hitting her during sex. Even though inside I was like "WTF". I said: "how many teeth you want me to knock out?"

    She got defensive and said look I'm sharing things with you I've never told anyone please don't joke about it as I like you and am afraid of how you'll respond.

    Cut a long story short she enjoys being slapped in the face during sex (not too hard) just to get a kick on the "being put in her place" thing.

    Anyone else had anything similar?
    First of all, as Starfox said, never ever joke at her desires. You want her to feel safe enough with you to be able to express her desires and - if you also like it, act them out - and you also want to be able to act out your desires.

    If you make jokes about her, it is a very big risk that she will feel rediculed, and will not want to share her desires with you any more. So first off - sincerely apologize to her for laughing at her (even if it was a while ago).

    Just a simple and calm "Sorry for making a joke the other day when you told me you like being slapped, it just caught me a bit off guard, and I acted immaturely" should do.

    Secondly, yes, this is very common. Almost all women I have had sex with are more or less submissive in bed, and get off on being dominated at least to a certain degree in bed. For some, light bondage and/or being blindfolded while I explore their bodies and them being told what to do in bed is enough, ranging all the way up to wanting pretty hard S/M stuff.

    Now, if you like this stuff - good for you; just go with the flow. If you are not in to it, then maybe you should try to slightly tone down your dominate energies when picking up girls, and you will attract girls that are less submissive.

    One piece of advice, though; if you want to explore the advanced BDSM stuff; read about it, play it safe with safeword etc, and try to learn more from an experienced BDSM master, as this stuff can bring out very strong emotions in the submissive (not to mension the actual risks for physical damage if you don't know what is safe and not). It is vital that you know how to handle those emotions. In everything but light dominance and spanking, the girl literally puts her complete trust over her well-being in your hands, so you must assume full responsibility and know what to do, or she can get seriously fucked up.

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    Thanks for the advice. I'd just never had a woman ask me to hit them in the face before. But it makes sense in that I should have responded better.

    No I'm not into full on BDSM and I guess I never will be.

    If it's a fuckbuddy type relationship or a relationship based around sex I guess I'd have no problem slapping her around if that's what she really wants. But as soon as this happens any love I felt for them will go out the window I think.

    I mean being dominant is one thing, that's what we are instinctually as men, but we are also more than just that. Beating someone because they enjoy it is something else. That just relegates all feelings to the bedroom and leaves nothing else.

    I think it just enforces my desire to meet someone who I couldn't really bear to hit (in the face), then again that type of girl wouldn't get off on it anyway.

    Oh well. Love is rarer than sex.

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    If this is someone you just started dating and she said she's never done this before? I find that part interesting.

    Why would she have you do this and no one else?

    If she asks you to do something you're uncomfortable with, just tell her it's not something you're comfortable with doing....for now. "I need to think about it". She probably won't hold it against you. But she's probably going to open up more about her fantasies with you, and most of the time her just thinking about it can excite her just as much as doing it.

    She'd probably be up for playing a prostitute showing up at a cheap sleazy motel, with wig, high heels, and cheap perfume, but you both should pick names.

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    Quote Originally Posted by sdnightfly View Post
    If this is someone you just started dating and she said she's never done this before? I find that part interesting.

    Why would she have you do this and no one else?
    She didn't say she'd never done it before she just never openly discussed it.

    @sdnightfly, lol that's a good one..

    Yeah I'm fine with hitting her in the face during sex like she wants. But I have trouble feeling anything meaningful towards that person afterwards if you see what I mean. Her personality doesn't really fascinate me after that.

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    Sorry to hear that. She might be thinking relationship as you gradually lose respect for her doing what you're doing.

    I'm not saying to have the discussion right now, but if she keeps wanting to take it further and further, might want to put the brakes on it. Hard to say how intimate and open she's going to be with you if you're looking for something more than role play dom/sub stuff.

    Quote Originally Posted by gold333 View Post
    She didn't say she'd never done it before she just never openly discussed it.

    @sdnightfly, lol that's a good one..

    Yeah I'm fine with hitting her in the face during sex like she wants. But I have trouble feeling anything meaningful towards that person afterwards if you see what I mean. Her personality doesn't really fascinate me after that.

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    No, but I had one half strangle me last weekend. Ive slammed her a few times now and last time we screwed we were really getting into it. She climbed on top of me and was ragging the hell out of me, I close my eyes for a second and the next thing her hands are round my neck like a vice and she is smashing my head into the pillow while riding me! It took me a few seconds of my head bobbing around like a speed ball before I realized what was happening. Most surreal thing Ive ever had happen to me in bed. Apparently her ex used to like it...bloody weirdo he must of been!

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