Discuss Almost LJBF'd but kinda salvaged - Advice needed! at the Relationships within the The Attraction Forums. Dating Advice.; Almost LJBF'd but kinda salvaged - Advice needed!
The situation is thus:
1. I began ...
Almost LJBF'd but kinda salvaged - Advice needed!
The situation is thus:
1. I began seeing a great girl about a month ago. She had a bf at the time but good game allowed me to lure her away...!
2. The relationship actually got pretty intense pretty quickly, and there was never much mention of the previous (i thought...) bf while we were together.
3. A week ago she left for overseas, she'll be back in 2 weeks. The night before she leaves I see her and we have a very deep and a little bit awkward conversation about her trying to LJBF me for her previous bf (it even involved a note...) I managed to wrangle the convo out of the 'definite' and into the 'loose/vague' to gain some ground/time. Essentially I looked at it from her perspective - "either a relationship that's stable and secure (prev-bf), or excitement and novelty of something fresh (me)" - and instead of using any form of logic, I appealed to her emotions to "see where we could end up"...
So there was no real concrete understanding gained at the end of the night, other than an unstable anxiety knowing that we would work shit out when she comes back...
3a. In post-analysis I realised that continuing attraction during and after comfort/seduction is really important. I felt that I settled into normal convo/routine too quickly once we 'were together'. More attraction would have cemented my position in her life by: a) giving her that little bit of anxiety over losing me that pushing-pulling achieves, and b) providing more interest in her life, above the security of comfort.
4. So now whilst I have been enjoying the fruits of my new freedom, I'm still thinking that there is potential to once again bf-destroy when she gets back. I reckon the best course of action is to essentially game-as-normal but I think it will need some tweaking/adjustment. Plus, I move back and forward on whether to contact her when she's away...
Anyone been in this position? What adjustments are needed to continue gaming when she gets back? Any thoughts on contact while she's away? Advice appreciated!
AKA, she wanted to keep things open in the event she met some guy when she was away.
She's the one in power in this situation. Why? - because she has options. She can see you, her bf, or the random guy on her trip.
You're being needy. Date other girls.
Last edited by BigDuke6; 04-29-2008 at 10:15 AM.
You should never steal away other peoples girls on purpose. Thats some really low shit. I think you should let her go back to her old BF and then date some other girls.